El Taco De Genial, having left Seth's mansion after Lerch tried to snack on his meaty filling, is nervously wandering the nearby woods. Before he left he had tried to get his oversized hands on a weapon, unfortunately the only thing he was able to find stashed away in the mansion was a collection of dildoes and lubrication. After a legthy debate with himself, El Taco De Genial decided that any weapon was better than no weapon, so he grabbed Lerch's prized double ended black dildo and set off to find any other survivors.
Now, as he cautiously makes his way through the brush, trying to avoid stepping on any loose twigs or leaves, he can't help but wonder if he was better off just trying to survive Seth's advances. He had wanted so bad to much on what he thought was simply a giant taco, and not a man-taco. El Taco De Genial had tried to reason with him, tried to tell him that he wasn't fully a taco and that it would still be cannibalism, but Seth just wouldn't listen. So he had to do the only logical thing and smash Seth over the head with a vase.
The sound of branches cracking nearby breaks El Taco De Genial's thoughts and he quickly twists around to find the source. He can't see anything in the darkness but the unmistakable sound of zombie groaning brings about his worst fears. El Taco De Genial quickly turns back around and scuttles in the opposite direction as quickly as he can.
Suddenly without warning a lone zombie breaks through the brush in front of him. With a mighty/girl-like yell, El Taco De Genial whips out the large black double ended dildo he liberated from Seth's closet and begins repeatedly smacking the zombie in the face with it.
It of course has no effect.
Realizing that he's screwed, El Taco De Genial drops the dildo to the ground and runs off, the zombie in tow, and begins screaming for help.
Post by The 8th Wonder on Jul 2, 2012 14:10:10 GMT -5
In Reading, Markus Jayson and Kelvin Staylor, The 8th Wonder, walk down an empty street.
Jayson: Have you noticing that there are no people out today?
Jayson: I saw Billy the Mailman eating one of mom's chicken's this morning. That's not weird to you?
Staylor: No. Chicken is high in protein.
Jayson: Oh, yeah, good point.
The dumb duo keep walking down the street alerting a stray zombie from a side street. The zombie begins to lumber towards them from the left. Jayson and Staylor turn and look at what used to be a man, but now is a blood covered rotting corpse walking toward them.
Staylor: Poor homeless man. I bet you he could use a dollar!
Staylor approaches the zombie to give him a dollar from his pocket.
Jayson: I don't know if I would -
The zombie buries his teeth into Staylor's arm.
Kelvin is too dumb to move away and continues to get bitten.
Staylor: WHY IS HE SO ANGRY!?
His brother finally comes to try and unlatch the zombie from his step-brother. His brilliant plan to do this is to tap the zombie on the shoulder and ask him to stop nicely. So, yeah, he gets bitten too. Ten minutes late Markus Jayson and Kelvin Staylor are lying on the pavement providing a meal to one hungry zombozo. You didn't really think the two dumbest members of the WCF roster were going to survive a zombie outbreak, did you?
When news of the outbreak began, Doc sent Mary to the Carribean onboard his luxury yacht. There she would be safe, however, Doc was zooming along on a 'borrowed' dirtbike, his pistols at his side. When people all around him began the transformation to zombification, Doc did the first thing that came natural, he took a big healthy upper decker in the Pantheon locker room. After that satisfying evacuation, Doc busted into the nearest sporting goods store and raided the ammunition, and grabbing a double barrel coach gun, and a lever action .45 rifle.
Nearing a country road intersection, Doc noticed a few cars piled up. Slowing to a stop, he pulled the shotgun, and one of his Peacemakers. There were a few corpses strewn about, and not knowing what else to do, he put a pair of rounds in each of their heads. As he reloaded his pistol, a half naked zombie came running after him. Calmly Doc turned and blew her head off with a pull on both triggers of his shotgun, a true doubletap... "What a waste of good pussy..." At that moment a glint caught his eye, coming down the road towards him. Doc took cover behind the motorbike and reloaded his weapons as a car began to come into view...
An old beat up Ford Ranchero....
86/114/50 4x RPotW 23x MotW 7x WotW 5x WCF Tag Champ 2x WCF TV Champ 1x WCF US Champ 1x WCF Hardcore Champ 1x WCF Internet Champ 2x Confed Champ 2010 TTotY
~-_.*You are surrounded by total Darkness, with just a television set in front of You, the following was heard....
News Reporter: OH MY-Y-Y-Y GOD!! THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!! THE NEWS STUDIO IS IN SHAMBLES!! PEOPLE ARE DYI-!! AGG-H-HGG-GG <garble-garble>
~-_.*You continue to witness the disastrous activity upon the television, that's when You see a herd a shuffling zombies slowly shuffle across the screen. The news reporter convulses as part of his head has been removed. Intestines hang out, some a half dozen zombies snack on him. You begin to drool at the site, then You hear the voice...
Oblivion: WHAT'S THIS FUCKING NONSENSE?!? ZOMBIES!?! THOSE AREN'T FUCKING ZOMBIES... THOSE ARE THE TRUE FLESH EATING MONSTERS...[/color]
~-_.*Oblivion points and The Pet pans the camera to the right and shows drooling and snarling sexual beasts that are The Vixens. they begin to scream out...
The Vixen: We need to join in the fun!! PLEASE!! PLEASE!! PLEASE!! Those aren't the true flesh eaters.... WE ARE!! WE ARE THE ONLY ONES THAT CAN STOP THEM AND YOU KNOW IT TO BE TRUE... OBI!![/color]
Oblivion: OKAY!! OKAY!! DAMN IT!! ZOMBIES!! YOU ARE DEAD MEAT!![/color]
~-_.*You continue to plaster your eyes towards the television, then within The Darkness You hear it, once more... CLICKING, MOANING, HISSING, AND GROANING!! The Gathering is close and so is Oblivion. You hear the eerie giggling from The Vixen. You begin to smell the odoriferous aroma of algae and sulfur get stronger. You hear the scraping of long nails against cold steel. You feel the warm breath of the dead against your cold pasty skin...
Oblivion: GUESS WHAT?! YOU'RE COMING WITH US!![/color]
~-_.*A large hand grabs You, by the back of your scruff and pull You away. As soon as You are pulled away from the television, You are enthralled deep inside the underbelly, of The Darkness. You hear screaming of torturous activities as visions of bodies being pulled apart and being devoured whole. you begin to scream out in complete insanity. Your entire body is being grabbed and pulled on, until your body is at rest and EVERYTHING.... STOPS!!
Oblivion: OPEN YOUR EYES!![/color]
Location: New York City Time: 11:37 P.M.
~-_.*Manhattan is completely overrun by the brain dead death walkers. Oblivion, along with IT's cameraman The Pet, You and IT's Children, stand there contemplating on their next moves...
Melissa: I say we go in there with our chainsaws and saw'd off shotguns and do what he do best...[/color]
The Children: KILL MEATSACKS!![/color]
Oblivion: Remember.... a few rules![/color]
The Vixens: Aw-w-w- ma-aann![/color]
Oblivion: IT is serious!! NO BITING!! VIXENS THIS NEXT RULE IS FOR YOU... NO FUCKING ANYONE!! NO FUCKING...NO SUCKING... NOTHING!! KILL!! KILL!! KILL!! IT HATES TO SAY THIS AND IT KNOWS YOU WILL BE COMPLAINING ABOUT IT... BUT KILL ONLY ZOMBIES!![/color]
The Children: Aw-w-w-ma-aann![/color]
Oblivion: YOU READY?!?!?[/color]
The Children: YEAH![/color]
Oblivion: NO!! ARE YOUR SERIOUSLY READY?!?!?[/color]
The Children: FUCK YEAH![/color]
Oblivion: OKAY THEN... LET'S GO-O-O-O-O!![/color]
~-_.*Then off they went, with chainsaws, shotguns, and cutting implements in hand. As You watch everything going in slow motion... the snarling heard of Oblivion and IT's Children running down the street towards the gnarly band of zombies...
Mini Oblivion: FUCK YOU ZOMBIE-IE-IE-EE-E-ES!![/color]
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Post by Kira Sakazaki on Jul 2, 2012 20:38:36 GMT -5
meanwhile in an unknown place.....
we can see an old-school TV plays this videoclip. and then a white-haired (cosplay) dude appeared while singing the song on that video clip.
Kira Sakazaki: Rasa sayang yang terus menerus meluas..... HEAVY ROTATION!!!
but that clip cutted for a breaking news....
Kira Sakazaki: oh, man! why you have to cut that videoclip? stupid newsreader!!
"In a response to the evergrowing spread of what is now being labeled as the "Agent Z Virus", the President of the United States has authorized a full military operation to handle the infection. Ground troops have already been mobilized to "Ground Zero", aka Maryland, where the heaviest concentration of the infected are. Troops that were previously overseas have been pulled out of their respective posts and are on there way to the various other temporary bases in Pennsylvania, Ohio, New Jersey, New York, Delaware and Virginia.
At this time we cannot confirm the number of infected that are currently walking the land, but it's easily in the millions. We can also confirm that the infection has begun spreading to the west, with reports coming in from as far west as Nebraska, as far North as Minnesota, and as far south as Louisina.
We can also confirm that the major cities on the East Coast (New York City, Washington D.C., Boston, Philadelphia and Baltimore) have stopped all evacuation procedures, per order of the President. While it's been a hugely controversial decision in many's minds, the thought is that the cities are full of too many infected and that the infected need to be contained. Some conspiracy theorists have speculated that the President may be planning a bombing to quell the infestation, but of course all theories have been shot down by the President's top aides.
Kira Sakazaki: .....are? Zombie? aah, Zombie is only available in videogames! come on, man! get a lif.....
a bunch of zombies crashes Kira's front door.
Kira Sakazaki: wo-ho-ho-howw!!!! yo, neighbors! thank you for coming! but, are you guys alright? ooh, Baka! they are zombies, they can't talk...... Zombies? Zombies?? oh God!! this is real!!
Zombies start to attack Kira but Kira can successfully evades those attacks. then he picks up a giant holy sword hanging in the wall.
Kira Sakazaki: Father, allow me to use this sword as my self-defense weapon!
then, Kira picks a twin revolver inside the shelf.
Kira Sakazaki: okay, preparation done! now, LET'S ROCK!!!!
Kira fights those zombies just like this:
after all zombies defeated, Kira leaves the house as the video clip on TV ends. Kira sings the last line of the song....
Kira Sakazaki: HEAVY...... RO~~TA~~TION!!!!
*peeeeeeep* the TV goes off as Kira starts his adventure to fight a zombies.
Disappointed that his amazing Dukes of Hazzard-style entrance had gone entirely unnoticed -- largely because Lerch had been busy doing very strange and borderline homoerotic things to a man in a taco suit -- Johnny Reb had promptly taken his leave of the Lerch estate. Clearly, his employer was so consumed by the horror of the situation that he had retreated deep into his own psyche, and might not ever return. The zombies probably wouldn't really want him anyway. Besides, his contract absolutely did not cover this...
He finds himself now driving down what was once a busy highway, weaving between abandoned vehicles scattered across the road. Movement up ahead catches his eye; not a zombie -- the movement is too purposeful, too furtive. A survivor, then. Johnny Reb parks a few yards away from a dirt bike, gets out of the car, and shoulders his sawed-off shotgun. As he nears, he realizes he recognizes the figure attempting to shelter behind the bike.
Reb: Doc? What the hell are you doin' way out here?
A ready to collapse from exhaustion El Taco De Genial finally emerges from the woods and, with a sigh of relief, drops to his knees and raises his arms in triumph.
"Yes! I Finally made it out of those woods and escaped the zombies!"
Suddenly a pair of zombies emerge from the woodline behind El Taco De Genial and tackle them to the ground. They begin clawing at his hard taco shell with their fingers, chipping away at it. One of them finds his meaty filling and begins to scoop it out. It sniffs it and then tosses it to the side. Apparently they don't like the taste of tacos. With a grunt, both zombies get off of El Taco De Genial and leave back into the woods. A frightened El Taco De Genial sits up and looks around.
"...what? Zombies don't like tacos?"
A confused El Taco De Genial pushes himself up to his feet and starts to walk away, muttering to himself, when a bear appears from out of nowhere and tackles him to the ground. The camera pans upwards to the sky as the screams of El Taco De Genial can be heard all over the Reading countryside. Turns out that while Zombies don't like Tacos, bears really do.
FPV paced back and forth inside his living room. Now that he actually had company with him, he realized that he might need to formulate a better plan then the one he had cooked up before. That, and the Monster he had just drank was making him feel a bit on edge. He turned to both Captain Punishment and Terry, who were sitting on his couch.
FPV: Allright, so guys, if we're gonna' live through this, we're gonna' need a plan. Does anyone have any ideas?
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Captain Punishment, previously nervously gnawing on his fingernails while hiding behind the couch, suddenly springs up to his feet.
CP: "Eureka! I've got it!"
Both FPV and Terry look to Punishment, hoping to hear a most suitable idea for how to survive this ordeal.
CP: "Here's the way I see it. The zombies...they're out there. And us...we're in here. They're out there...we're in here. So what I'm saying is....let's just stay in here. I mean, do we really have to go outside? I've already taken the liberty of inventorying our supplies and we have enough food and fresh water to last the three of us for at least two months. So unless something completely unexpected happens we should be just fine."
Punishment strikes his heroic pose as he waits for the applause he thinks he deserves.
Jeff Purse was sitting in his barn, shotgun in hand. The door to the barn was open. On the roof, Kari, with a rifle and a scope. She got the far ones, he got the close ones. It went like this for a while. Until they got bored/ran out of ammo. They barricaded themselves inside the barn, hoping that someone would come and bring them more ammo.
They also had lots of sex. If you might die, might as well do it while fucking.
2x WCF Champion WCF Hardcore Champion 2x WCF TV Champion WCF US Champion WCF Tag Champ w/Nightrider WCF Trios Champ with Jay Omega and Alex Richards War IX winner 5x RP of the week
Doc stood when Reb spoke and holstered his pistol, and picked up his coach gun. "Damn, nice to see that you have avoided becoming a zombie as well..." unloading his bags strapped to the bike, he carried them to the Ranchero and dropped them in the back seat. Pointing with the shotgun at a Hostess truck in the ditch, Doc seemed agitated. "I am having a serious craving for that delicacy known as a Twinkie..."
Waving Reb along, Doc started for the truck. Shouldering the shotgun, he rips the door open and prepares to shoot anyone or anything inside. Fortunately the truck is empty, well kinda. A large mound of boxes fall out... "Where are you, you spongy, yellow, delicious bastards?" After digging through the truck for a few minutes, Doc finally loses it and starts throwing things. Sno-Balls? Sno-Balls?!? Where's the fucking Twinkies?!?!?!" Slamming one of the doors shut, Doc flops on the ground, looking dejected, "I don't understand what the fucking problem is, the Zombies aren't eating them. Tell me Johnny, what does a guy have to do to get a fucking Twinkie around here?"
Last Edit: Jul 3, 2012 16:57:34 GMT -5 by Doc Henry
86/114/50 4x RPotW 23x MotW 7x WotW 5x WCF Tag Champ 2x WCF TV Champ 1x WCF US Champ 1x WCF Hardcore Champ 1x WCF Internet Champ 2x Confed Champ 2010 TTotY
Post by Noob Cha-Cha on Jul 3, 2012 20:43:23 GMT -5
(response to Reb and Doc)
I had spent that entire night since escaping the streets running through the woods getting face raped by branches and spider-webs. Luckily I was wearing my mask, which provided some protection in the woods. Noob Cha-Cha liked her exercise. This was ridiculous though. I lost five pounds since yesterday. Everywhere I turned lurked a zombie. Cha-Cha did not like this. My foot itself had become worn out from kicking them in the face. It was then that as they say I was out of the woods for now… or however briefly. It had been a few minutes since a zombie crossed my path, now were a good time to rest. I reached into my backpack retrieving the box of Twinkies I had brought with me and then I heard a gunshot coming from the highway up ahead.
Noob Cha-Cha: Oh?
The scene came into sight while I watched from the high grass. I saw a man duck down behind his motorcycle when a truck approached. Would he kill him? Loot his body? The two began talking and appeared familiar with other until the other gentlemen began losing it and ranting on about Twinkies. Well, Noob Cha-Cha could solve that dilemma. I crept through the weeds like the sneaky ninja I am and reached into my backpack grabbing a single Twinkie, hoisting it above my head and tossing it towards the Twinkie crazed man. It hit the side of his face.
Laid out on the lawn in front of FPV's home is WCF's Original Superhero, Captain Punishment. It seems the World Champion and Terry Roberts were not at all impressed with Punishment's plan for survival, so they beat the crap out of him and threw him out the nearest window. Punishment slowly starts to come to and then quickly realizes where he is at. He springs up to his feet and spins around to find the window he traveled through has been boarded up already. He looks around for any zombies and then sprints to the door where he begins banging with both fists.
CP: "LET ME IN! LET ME IN!"
From the other side of the door the World Champion can be heard shouting "No!". Suddenly a rustle from some nearby bushes causes Punishment to leap into the air. A zombie bursts through the brush and charges Punishment. Punishment quickly turns and runs off, his cape flapping in the wind. Punishment runs, the zombie chases and hilarity ensues as the two put on a performance that would be worthy of the Keystone Cops theme. Punishment in an attempt to elude the zombie climbs up the ladder of a slide. He thinks he's safe, but fails to realize that the slide was meant for a child and is only two feet off the ground. He tries to go down the slide but gets stuck partway. As the zombie draws near he unsuccessfully tries to free himself. The zombie reaches out only to grab handfuls of cape. Punishment gets free and tries to run off, only to get pulled to the ground by the cape.
CP: "Do I die a hero's death? Or part with my iconic ca...screw it!"
Punishment unties the blue bath towel from around his neck and takes off running, sans cape. The zombie, who had been chewing on the towel, spits it out of his mouth and takes off after him.
CP: "Ah, I can run so much faster without my cape. I should have gotten rid of that thing lon..."
Suddenly Punishment collides with El Taco De Genial, who was also running away from a zombie.
CP: "Citizen Taco! How dare you run into me?"
El Taco De Genial: "What? You ran into me?"
The pair get into an argument over who ran into who, completely forgetting about the zombies until they're almost upon them. The two get up and sprint for a nearby shed. They scramble inside and then slam the door shut. Punishment then notices the chunks of shell and meat missing from El Taco De Genial. Also, there's a lack of an eye. And a hand. Really the man-taco just looks like shit.
CP: "What the hell happened to you? ...WAS IT A ZOMBIE??? ARE YOU INFECTED??? INFECTED! INFECTED!"
El Taco De Genial: "No you idiot, it wasn't a zombie. It was a bear."
CP: "A zombie bear?"
El Taco De Genial: "No, a bear bear."
CP: "So the bear was naked? Did he violate you?"
El Taco De Genial: "No he didn...okay well maybe a little bit."
Suddenly the pair feel the presence of another person in the tiny shed and turn around to find another of WCF's Survivors. It's Cahir!
Cahir: "The hell are you two doing in my shed? Can't you see this is Cahir's shed?"
CP: "I'm sorry, did you say Chair's shed?"
Cahir: "DAMNIT MY NAME'S CAHIR! NOT CHAIR!"
El Taco De Genial: "Cher? I LOVE CHER!"
Cahir: "NOT CHER! CHAIR!"
CP: "Share? You want to share? Well go ahead."
Cahir: "Agh. I'm better off with the zombies."
With a mighty huff Cahir grabs his trusty wood axe, throws open the door and walks out into the open where a pair of zombies are waiting. Punishment quickly shuts the door, turns the lock and then pushes a chair under the knob. The sound of axe meeting flesh can be heard briefly before a mighty, manly scream echos throughout the land. Punishment and El Taco De Genial exchange glances.
CP: "Eh, I'm sure he's good."
El Taco De Genial: "Yep, probably."
The two then take a seat on the floor and begin strategizing their next move.
Unlike most of the roster who was in Reading, PA when all this went down, Gravedigger had decided to take a few days to head to the beach. Gravedigger had headed down to Myrtle Beach, SC to visit with former WCF wrestler, Troy Malenko.
Along with Gravedigger was JJ, Mike D and Adrian. They were staying at one of Gravedigger's favorite hotels down in the Myrtle Beach area...well, actually it was in the Cherry Grove area just north of MB. The name of the place was The Prince Resort. Really awesome hotel with plenty to do, plenty of beachfront property, two restaurants, and a huge pier extending from the hotel to far out in the ocean with a two-story observation deck on the end of it. It was the only two-story observation deck on any pier on the East Coast to be exact.
Luckily for Gravedigger, Mike D, JJ, Adrian and Troy, they were all out on the pier that day when all hell broke lose. Cell phones started going off and people started pulling out their smart phones and within minutes, people on the pier were watching the early news of the zombie outbreak.
Gravedigger looked down along the beach front and after a few minutes, you started seeing people pulling up all their things off of the beach and hurrying back to their hotels. JJ turned to Gravedigger.
JJ: Should we head to Troy's place?
Troy shook his head.
Troy: No way, my place is too small for all of us. Actually, I have an idea. I'll be right back.
Troy runs down the pier along with all the other people panicking as the group turns and continues watching people freak out on the beach. A few minutes later, Troy pushes back through the rest of the crowd still trying to get off of the pier. Troy is carrying a long piece of paper. He directs everyone over to a nearby picnic table. He unfolds the paper and it turns out to be a map. Troy pulls out his smartphone and after hitting a few buttons on it and about 30 seconds of him looking through it, he takes out a pen and starts marking places on the map. Troy grins sheepishly.
Troy: Yeah, so I'm a zombie fanatic and I've planned for this day. First, these places on the map are gun stores.
Everyone looks at Troy like he's crazy.
Troy: Ok look, here's what is going to happen. As soon as we finish talking, immediately call your families and make sure they get to a safe place. That's priority number one. Then we're loading up a couple of vehicles. Here's what's going to start happening soon.
Some people here are going to be panicking and they will load their cars up and leave by tonight to head home like idiots. Some will go to homes where the outbreak hasn't reached, others will get caught up in it trying to get home.
I've got a couple of guns in my car. We're going to raid these gun shops...and then....
Troy starts marking some other places on the map.
Troy: Then we head to these places and scrounge for food. Like I said, some people are going to bail and leave here. Others will start rioting and looting. The police can't handle it all so we'll go to these places where the police are likely not to be at and we'll get what we need. Then we come back here.
Gravedigger finally speaks up.
Gravedigger: Here as in the hotel? Why here?!
Troy gestures around them.
Troy: First, there's the ocean. We have one direction covered and second...there's the ocean. We're at a hotel with a pier. We can fish for food. Third, we're at a hotel. If we can keep it safe by barricading and working a system, we can keep the zombies out of the stairwells and we can stay on the upper levels, even all the way up to the 19 floors of this building. The lobby has doors right above the restaurant pier so as long as we keep that area barricaded in such a way, we could almost walk right from the hotel to the pier to fish more when needed.
Look, the place is going to be practically abandoned and the outbreak hasn't reached this far yet. It will probably be a couple of weeks at least before it does. It's in North Carolina right now, so we have at least a week.
Troy looks back over his shoulder at the pier which has pretty much cleared out. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small pistol and puts it in JJ's hand. Troy points towards the beach.
Troy: JJ, I'm giving you this pistol for protection right now. Not from zombies, but crazy people. You and Gravedigger, you two leave the pier and I want you to either split up or quickly head really far up the beach in one direction and then head back in the other and I want you two to grab up as much valuable stuff that was left behind as you can, if anyone left anything behind. Mike D, Adrian and myself are going to go ahead and start collecting all these fishing rods, equipment and the buckets of fish as we can. Give me your hotel keycard too, Digger, and we'll start taking all this stuff up as fast as we can. The hotel has power for now and there's no telling if the owners will stay here with some of the other crazies like us or if they'll turn out the power soon and run.
We should be able to get all this stuff back up to the rooms plus whatever you guys bring up by around 2pm or so and then we'll pile into the cars and head for the gun stores and the food stores. We should be back by tonight and since it'll be practically a ghost town with nothing but looters by then, we'll start setting things up by tomorrow.
Everyone stands there kind of stunned for a few seconds, trying to let all of this sink in. Adrian turns to Troy.
Adrian: You are one crazy motherfucker, homes.
Troy grins and turns to Adrian.
Troy: Yeah and I bet you would have thought I was crazy if I told you this whole zombie outbreak could ever happen, too.
Adrian smirks and shrugs, nodding. Gravedigger reaches into his pocket and hands Troy his keycard for his room. JJ slowly puts the gun in her purse.
Gravedigger: Ok, so we'll get back here in 2 hours at the latest if we find anything.
Troy looks down at his watch.
Troy: Ok, good 2 hours is a great time. Even though there's not much danger out there right now, good luck anyway.
Gravedigger and Troy shake hands. Gravedigger and JJ walk down the ramp towards the hotel. Troy, Adrian and Mike D quickly start gathering things around the pier. Gravedigger and JJ can be seen walking down the beach towards the north as the scene fades out.
FPV: Aight, so I think I just came up with a better plan then what Punishment came up with.
Terry Roberts was sitting back down on FPV's couch, fresh from tossing out Captain Punishment out the window. He listened intently to FPVs plan.
FPV: Step One, we go inside my garage and get out the Gran torino. Step Two, we nail up a whole bunch of custom made iron spikes. Step Three, make sure the tank is loaded and head out to find better shelter. I'm sure if we stayed holed up in here we'd be overcome pretty quickly. What do ya say?
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Post by Terry Roberts on Jul 4, 2012 17:16:40 GMT -5
Nodding his head in utter agreement. Terry empties the rest of his pack of gummi bears, tossing a few into his mouth
Terry: Hit any grocery stores, convience shops and hardware stores on the way, were going to need supplies and plenty of weapons. Chainsaws, axes, materials for home made bombs, and wherever we go we are going to need to make fortifiable defenses as well. Provisions first aid for any survivors as well.
Lifting the empty gummi bag waving it in the air in front of PV's face
Terry: And i need more gummi bears.
He then walks around the house, scavenging anything that could be of use on their journey.
Post by The Polar Phantasm on Jul 5, 2012 9:41:56 GMT -5
.... Iceberg-Six online.
.... Access to World Wide Web curtailed. Assuming emergency procedures. Contacting 'Pantheon' members....
.... Message sent. Entering standby mode for power conservation.
.... Iceberg-Six idle.
[Scene: The Ruby Slipper (New Orleans, Louisiana). Cornelius Casanova and Kid Phantasm sit on the sidewalk beside Cleveland Avenue eating breakfast.]
Cornelius: Man, you shoulda seen this chick. Her roommate wadn't bad, either, man...
Phantasm: You know I'm not interested, man. I already met my woman, and lost her... eventually, I'll find her again. Until then, I'm just trying to enjoy my vacation.
Cornelius: Kinda quiet out here today, man... normally there's all kinda hoes out on Canal Street. I don't even see the rollers cruisin' the neighborhood lookin' for dope fiends.
[Kid P stands, putting his napkin and silverware on the table next to his half-eaten omelet.]
Phantasm: I gotta hit the head. Keep an eye on that omelet, man...
Cornelius: If it moves, shoot it. Gotcha.
[Kid Phantasm heads inside and looks to the TV, which shows CNN's reports regarding the unusual plague sweeping the east coast.]
TV Reporter: '...most of the eastern seaboard is affected, some places more heavily than others. New York City is pretty much a zombie wasteland at this point, as well as Boston... Washington DC... Philadelphia...'
[Forgetting about the bathroom, Kid Phantasm runs back outside.]
Phantasm: Fuck breakfast. It's Z-Day, Corndog... we gotta get to Pennsylvania and clique up with Pantheon.
Cornelius: ...what you mean we?
Phantasm: It's the end of the world, man - I could use the backup. Plus you've got a car.
From the files of Lucien Hicks, Renegade Reporter:
I've spent most of my adult life wondering how the end was coming... stray bullet, maybe? Streetcar accident? Meteor shower? Riot related to a Saints victory? My list of probable ways I'd be killed never included being eaten alive by the Walking Dead... in retrospect, I should have guessed that first. On the whole, this country has become obsessed with zombies over the past thirty years... and as this obsession grew to a fever pitch, it was only a matter of time before some poor fool actually unleashed something akin to the T-virus on the population.
I awoke like many other mornings, confused and on my futon in my home in New Orleans... on this morning, though, I awoke to a pounding on my front door. "Hicks, it's Cornelius and the Phantasm... if you're still human, let us the fuck in!" I opened the door to see two crazed-looking professional wrestlers, both armed. Cornelius had a wicked-looking sawed-off shotgun strapped across his back and what appeared to be a .45 at his hip... Kid Phantasm had a hunting rifle and a two-and-a-half foot long machete with him.
"I'm only mostly human at this hour, Kid. What's the scoop?" I packed my pipe, expecting Kid to have some sort of drug-related reason for being at my house before noon.
"It's started, Lucien. Some fucker let the bug loose, and now the Eastern seaboard's all shambling around looking for brains."
I dropped my pipe, shattering it on my hardwood floor. Phantasm was right to show when he did- this would be the biggest story of the decade, at the very least, and he was giving me an advance on it.
"You're gonna need some weapons, brah... you got anything sharp around here?" I'd only met Cornelius Casanova once, but I remember liking the guy. "If you got anything like a chainsaw or something, man, that might be what's up."
I went into the back of my house and came back a few minutes later with two ziploc bags full of various substances and a massive fire axe. "Think this'll do?"
"It's a start, Lucien...", Phantasm interjected. "It's definitely a start."
[Roughly five hundred miles later, our odd trio of heroes pulls into a truck stop in northern Alabama. The place looks deserted. Cornelius gets out of his green Oldsmobile and looks around cursively... Phantasm gets out, clutching the hunting rifle.]
Cornelius: I'm gonna go in and check to see if the pumps turn on still... one y'all got my back or what?
[Lucien Hicks gets out with his axe.]
Hicks: Fuck it. Only live once, right?
Phantasm: Unless you turn into the undead, sure.
[The three push through the slightly-barricaded truck stop door. Inside, there are bodies everywhere - headless ones, to be specific.]
Phantasm: Hmm... looks like somebody's already used these all up.
Post by Barnabus Smythe Esq. on Jul 5, 2012 10:56:59 GMT -5
The ‘Pride of the Seven Seas’ lumbers down a street in New York City. Despite attempts from the government to level the city, zombies are still everywhere. The city with the largest population of people in the United States, quite obviously, now has the largest population of zombies. Swarms upon swarms of zombies have converged on Captain Barnabus Smythe Esquire’s 1800’s pirate ship and are pounding on the wood and searching for ways to get aboard. The last pirate in the new world is in the midst of one of the greatest battles of his life. For the past several hours he and his crew have been frantically launching cannons into the mass of zombies trying to thin out their numbers. As they’ve broken containment and come aboard the crew has made quick work of them. Their purpose in New York is that of a rescue mission, but the swarm is close to overwhelming them.
The F-350 pulling his ship strains as it runs over zombie after zombie losing traction with the road as its tires spin on the corpses underneath. The ‘Pride’ is going no more than 10 knots down the street allowing the zombie swarm more time than ever to climb aboard. Barnabus Smythe Esq. stands in his crow’s nest looking down upon the hundreds and hundreds of zombies attacking his ship and the truck pulling it. His unflinching demeanor gives hope to his crew who are chanting pirate songs below. He watches as two zombies are able to climb aboard only to meet the end of a cutlass from one his alert crewmen. Other crewmen can be seen running around below loading the cannons for fire. As they are loaded we here the thunderous voice of Barnabus Smythe ring out.
Barnabus: FIRE YOU DIRTY DOGS! FIRE! SEND THEM ALL TO THE DEPTHS!
BOOM. Nearly ten cannons are fired simultaneously blasting through the swarm of zombies like bowling balls and delivering the final resting place of dozens of the flesh-eaters. Barnabus pulls out his blunderbuss pistol and fires it down into the swarm as he screams more commands to his crew.
Barnabus: They will never take me ship! Load the cannons, quickly!
Just then another group of zombies are able to board the ship. Noticing that his crew is busy with the guns, Barnabus shoots down one zombie with his pistol just as it’s about to attack on of his crewmen. He swings down from the crow’s nest with the use of a rope and makes quick work of the rest of the zombies with his cutlass. The cannons are ready for fire once more.
Barnabus: FIRE! The guns spare no man, even if he shall already be dead!
The blast from the cannons sends zombies flying once more. Barnabus notices a cloud of smoke in the distance. He brings out his telescope and looks through it, seeing only smoke. He turns to his boatswain who is busily preparing the cannons again.
Barnabus: Bosun, to the watchtower! What be that ahead?
The boatswain climbs up the rope to the crow’s nest and pulls out his telescope to give report.
Boatswain: It be…a man, cap’n! A man with a machine that be spittin’ fire! He be setting the flesh eaters ablaze, sir!
Barnabus stares intently off into the distance as the cloud of smoke comes closer and closer. Finally it engulfs the F-350 pulling the boat and we come to a stop.
Barnabus: Weigh anchor men! Prepare the guns and watch ye sides. Nobody gets aboard this ship without my accord!
The cloud of smoke has now engulfed the front of the ship on the right hand side. We can see streams of flame from within the white smoke as zombies on that side of the ship are set on fire. On the left hand side of the ship the zombies are still attacking and little by little making their way onto the ship where they quickly meet the end of the cutlasses from Barnabus’ crew.
Barnabus: Aye! Off with their heads!
The man, the fire, and the smoke circle around the back of the ship setting zombie upon zombie aflame. The man walks up the left hand side extinguishing every single zombie that had been attacking ‘The Pride of the Seven Seas.’ The flames stop and slowly the smoke subsides, leaving only the smiling face of Jonny Fly in its wake.
Fly: Permission to come aboard, Captain?
Barnabus: Aye! Lift him up you scabs!
Fly is helped onto the deck by Barnabus’ crewmen. Barnabus approaches him as he gets to his feet.
Barnabus: Who be you?
Fly: Jonny Fly. The guy who you’re here to rescue. I’m glad you made it. Those motherfuckers took over my house about three hours ago. I’m glad to see you.
Barnabus: Aye, if you be Jonny Fly, where be our treasure that was promised?
Fly nods his head.
Fly: Of course, of course.
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out two five gold watches.
Fly: Where I used to wrestle, they gave us these for winning World Title belts. You can have them. Not much good to me in the zombie apocalypse.
Barnabus’s eyes light up at the glimmer of the gold watches in Fly’s hands. He reaches for them, but Fly pulls them away.
Fly: Not quite yet. Your mission isn’t over, Captain. Turn this ship around, we’re sailing to Denmark! Once you get me there I’ll give you your treasure…plus more!
Barnabus: Argh! I don’t be liking much of them danes!
Fly: Do you like gold?
Fly shakes the watches in front of Barnabus’s eyes. His eyes light up and he licks his lips.
Barnabus: Avast! Men, we be making sail to Denmark straight away! Hard to Starboard! Turn me vessel around!
Fly smiles and tucks the watches back into his pocket.
Fly: Hey, Captain, wouldn't happen to have any wenches aboard, would you?
Fly's mischievous smile provides the last imagery of the scene as the ship slowly begins to turn around for its long journey to Denmark.
John Gable: Hey, Seth. I won't pretend to know what is going on but if you ever see this. I would just like to ask if you could at least grant access to the RP boards. I really like reading old RPs. They mean a lot to me. I put a lot of work into them.
Jun 8, 2020 13:47:58 GMT -5
John Gable: And there is a friend I have been wanting to show them to because they want to read them as well. So, it would mean a lot to me that, if you see this, you could open of the RP boards again just so I could see it. If it isn't any trouble.
Jun 8, 2020 13:48:58 GMT -5
John Gable: Please and thank you.
Jun 8, 2020 13:49:04 GMT -5