Post by russellmorris on Jul 23, 2011 23:52:16 GMT -5
*Hank Brown stands in front of a WCF backdrop alone, mic in hand.*
Brown: Ladies and gentlemen, the man who survived the “over the top rope, you’re fired” match, “Magnificent” Russell Morris.
*Russell and Annabelle walk onto camera. Russell is in a tan Jones New York suit, sky blue striped button down and corresponding tie. Annabelle is in a form-fitting light blue Versace dress. Before Brown can begin, Russell starts.*
Russell: *trying to irritate Hank Brown.* Oh Hank boy, I’m sure it just chaps your ass to see me back here this week.
Brown: *remaining calm and collected.* Mr. Morris, I put my professionalism above personal bias when conducting an interview.
Russell: Oh I see it in your eyes, *pointing his fingers right in Brown’s face.* righhhht there. *Brown shoves Russell’s hand out of his face. Russell laughs while Annabelle just snickers.*
Brown: Mr. Morris, you were able to win this past week in your match…
Russell: (Arrogantly) Oh, wasn’t that fantastic Hank? (Looking behind the camera) We got the replay guys? Anybody?
Brown: (Irritated) No we don’t. As I was saying you won last week…
Russell: Well that just sucks Hank. Gotta get on the ball. *Brown glares at Morris.* Speaking of, I gotta get a hold of whoever had the contracts of those three guys, ya know, whose it, what’s his name and that guy…used to wear a shirt.
Brown: (Frustrated) Thunder, Tek and Montuori?
Russell: *brushing him off* Yeah, whatever. Nobody cares. But I wanted their old contracts as…well…trophies. I ‘spose. I killed their careers, I can mount ‘em the wall like a stuffed deer head.
Brown: (Attempting to regain control of the interview) ANYWAYS, you won your match and earned a shot at the WCF Television Title in a three-way match with the champion Kaylyn James Evans and “The Hero” Ryan Blake.
Russell: *Rubbing his hands together and looking off in the distance* My first shot at championship gold, or *quitting rubbing his hands and turning back to Brown.* should I say, my first championship in WCF.
Brown: (With a look of “Really?”) Aren’t you putting the cart in front of the horse here Russell?
Russell: *Looking at Brown* Hank Brown, what have we already established over the past four weeks? When I say I’m gonna do something, brotha, you can take it to the bank. *Looking back at the camera* When I said I would win my first night in WCF, I DID! When I said I would do you fans a service and get rid of those three guys not worthy to shine my boots, I DID!
Brown: (Under his breath) What about that whole “Ultimate Showdown Main Event” thing?
Russell: *cutting his eyes back to Brown* What was that Hank?
Brown: (Covering) Nothing.
Russell: You bet your sorry ass it was nothing.
Brown: (Annoyed) Well, how do you feel you match up with your opponents this week?
Russell: (mocking Brown) Good question HB! *looking off as if thinking* How do I match up with my opponents? That’s like asking how a tornado matches up with a trailer park. *Back at Brown* We all know how this show is gonna end, but it’ll be entertaining to watch ‘til then. You ever been through a tornado, Hank?
Brown: No.
Russell: Well it is an invigorating experience. During it, you have no idea what’s happenin’ ‘round you, but you know it ain’t good. Then afterwards, all that’s left is destruction and devastation. And until you’ve experienced it first hand, you have no idea how truly terrifying and devastating it is. No matter what is in its way, a tornado will win EVERY time.
Brown: So you are going to “destroy” Ryan and Kaylyn?
Russell: And you can take it to the bank. *Brown runs his fingers back and forth across the bridge of his nose, holding the mic up but looking down.* I mean, Ryan Blake, 6 foot, 175 pounds, ooo, I’m shakin’ in my boots. Yet another Mexican jumping bean we have here in WCF. Boy, you oughta know better. Ain't you learned nothing in your years wrestlin' or have you just had the little bit of sense left in ya, knocked outta ya? *nudging at Brown* Who knows, could’ve been that tainted water in New Jersey made this kid crazy.
Brown: *with a confused look* What the hell are you talking about?
Russell: Well, steppin’ into the ring with me. (Back to the camera) Boy, all you do is come out and pander to these morons and imbeciles who aren’t worth their weight in salt. *Brown throws his hands up, as if to say “I give up”.* And now, you gonna worry about them fools and try to step into the ring with me. Bad idea Skippy. So go on up, hop around like everybody out there in the audience wants to see and don’t mind me. I’ll be the one in ring, worry about *pointing to himself* number one, *pointing at the camera* taking care of b’ness, and winning the TV Title. (Mocking Blake) And it will be epic. (Aside to Brown) What kind of catchphrase is that?
Brown: YOU’RE gonna tell people about catchphrases?
Russell: Oh, bite me Brown.
Brown: (Getting back to the interview) You brought up walking out the TV champion, what about the champ, Kaylyn James Evans.
Russell: KJE, the newest Playboy centerfold. (Aside to Brown) Man, Hef must be gettin’ desperate for hoochies to drop trou. (Getting more personal with Brown) I mean, I’m sure you’ve gotta browser history that’ll make a sailor blush with shame. Hell, I’d put good money that yours has a bunch of sailors on it, don’t it Hank? *Brown steps back, appalled and offended by the insinuation made. Russell turns back to the camera* Calm down squirt. Don’t get your panties in a bunch. (Back to the camera) Kaylyn, you say you are “The Perfect Ten”. Really?! Well, I ‘spose maybe in your prime or up here in Pennsylvania because I don’t know whether I gotta newer model or just the Texas Edition, either way, *motioning at Annabelle* I gotta much better version. You know why? *pointing at the camera* You may be a ten, but (In a fake British accent) this one goes to eleven. (Back in his regular voice to Annabelle) Go ahead, give ‘em a preview of the goods. *Russell holds Annabelle’s hand high in the air as she does a slow 360 for the camera. Russell looks over to Hank Brown, whose mouth is hanging wide open.* (To Brown while fanning him) Breathe Hank! Breathe! *Brown shakes his head to get rid of the cobwebs as Annabelle just smirks. Russell pulls his arm down and breathes on his fingers.* OOO, too hot to handle. (Aside to Brown) I mean, come on, can’t top that, can ya?
Brown: (Stammering for words) Well…ummmm…uhhhh…
Russell: (Back to the camera) I think that says it all. And Kaylyn, not only do I have the best lookin’ woman in not only professional wrestling, but the entire world, in my corner, but when I get into the ring with you, which I’m sure what you’ve been waiting for since I got here…*Annabelle slaps his arm* (To Annabelle) What?! It’s her, not me. *Annabelle rolls her eyes* (Back to camera again) Anyway, when you get in the ring with me, you’ll realize that I am the class of the professional wrestling world. And sweetie, it doesn’t matter to me how big or little you are, how long you’ve had the belt, or how many backstage *looking at Brown before giving air quotes* “matches” you’ve had to keep that title, I’ll show you why this is man’s game and why I am on my way to becoming the greatest wrestler of all-time.
Brown: *Looking at his watch* Alright, let’s wrap this up.
Russell: (To Brown) Don’t rush me Brown? I’ll get out of here when I damn well please. (Back to the camera once again) You know, I love to surround myself with beautiful things; (growing in excitement and volume with everything he lists) beautiful cars, beautiful clothes, *pulling in Annabelle* beautiful women, (slowing and quieting down) but I am missing something. (softly, but with growing intensity with each statement) Ryan, Kaylyn, you’ve seen me each of the past three Mondays. You know, when I step into that ring, I am as good as gold, and come this Monday, I’m gonna prove that to everyone out there. And *pointing at the camera* THAT…*looking at Brown then back at the camera with the same Morris smirk. He continues in a medium-volume but still intense voice.* is just the way it is.
*Russell and Annabelle walk off camera arm-in-arm. Hank Brown watches them leave then looks back at the camera.*
Brown: Russell Morris, seemingly ready for his TV title shot this Monday at Slam.
Brown: Ladies and gentlemen, the man who survived the “over the top rope, you’re fired” match, “Magnificent” Russell Morris.
*Russell and Annabelle walk onto camera. Russell is in a tan Jones New York suit, sky blue striped button down and corresponding tie. Annabelle is in a form-fitting light blue Versace dress. Before Brown can begin, Russell starts.*
Russell: *trying to irritate Hank Brown.* Oh Hank boy, I’m sure it just chaps your ass to see me back here this week.
Brown: *remaining calm and collected.* Mr. Morris, I put my professionalism above personal bias when conducting an interview.
Russell: Oh I see it in your eyes, *pointing his fingers right in Brown’s face.* righhhht there. *Brown shoves Russell’s hand out of his face. Russell laughs while Annabelle just snickers.*
Brown: Mr. Morris, you were able to win this past week in your match…
Russell: (Arrogantly) Oh, wasn’t that fantastic Hank? (Looking behind the camera) We got the replay guys? Anybody?
Brown: (Irritated) No we don’t. As I was saying you won last week…
Russell: Well that just sucks Hank. Gotta get on the ball. *Brown glares at Morris.* Speaking of, I gotta get a hold of whoever had the contracts of those three guys, ya know, whose it, what’s his name and that guy…used to wear a shirt.
Brown: (Frustrated) Thunder, Tek and Montuori?
Russell: *brushing him off* Yeah, whatever. Nobody cares. But I wanted their old contracts as…well…trophies. I ‘spose. I killed their careers, I can mount ‘em the wall like a stuffed deer head.
Brown: (Attempting to regain control of the interview) ANYWAYS, you won your match and earned a shot at the WCF Television Title in a three-way match with the champion Kaylyn James Evans and “The Hero” Ryan Blake.
Russell: *Rubbing his hands together and looking off in the distance* My first shot at championship gold, or *quitting rubbing his hands and turning back to Brown.* should I say, my first championship in WCF.
Brown: (With a look of “Really?”) Aren’t you putting the cart in front of the horse here Russell?
Russell: *Looking at Brown* Hank Brown, what have we already established over the past four weeks? When I say I’m gonna do something, brotha, you can take it to the bank. *Looking back at the camera* When I said I would win my first night in WCF, I DID! When I said I would do you fans a service and get rid of those three guys not worthy to shine my boots, I DID!
Brown: (Under his breath) What about that whole “Ultimate Showdown Main Event” thing?
Russell: *cutting his eyes back to Brown* What was that Hank?
Brown: (Covering) Nothing.
Russell: You bet your sorry ass it was nothing.
Brown: (Annoyed) Well, how do you feel you match up with your opponents this week?
Russell: (mocking Brown) Good question HB! *looking off as if thinking* How do I match up with my opponents? That’s like asking how a tornado matches up with a trailer park. *Back at Brown* We all know how this show is gonna end, but it’ll be entertaining to watch ‘til then. You ever been through a tornado, Hank?
Brown: No.
Russell: Well it is an invigorating experience. During it, you have no idea what’s happenin’ ‘round you, but you know it ain’t good. Then afterwards, all that’s left is destruction and devastation. And until you’ve experienced it first hand, you have no idea how truly terrifying and devastating it is. No matter what is in its way, a tornado will win EVERY time.
Brown: So you are going to “destroy” Ryan and Kaylyn?
Russell: And you can take it to the bank. *Brown runs his fingers back and forth across the bridge of his nose, holding the mic up but looking down.* I mean, Ryan Blake, 6 foot, 175 pounds, ooo, I’m shakin’ in my boots. Yet another Mexican jumping bean we have here in WCF. Boy, you oughta know better. Ain't you learned nothing in your years wrestlin' or have you just had the little bit of sense left in ya, knocked outta ya? *nudging at Brown* Who knows, could’ve been that tainted water in New Jersey made this kid crazy.
Brown: *with a confused look* What the hell are you talking about?
Russell: Well, steppin’ into the ring with me. (Back to the camera) Boy, all you do is come out and pander to these morons and imbeciles who aren’t worth their weight in salt. *Brown throws his hands up, as if to say “I give up”.* And now, you gonna worry about them fools and try to step into the ring with me. Bad idea Skippy. So go on up, hop around like everybody out there in the audience wants to see and don’t mind me. I’ll be the one in ring, worry about *pointing to himself* number one, *pointing at the camera* taking care of b’ness, and winning the TV Title. (Mocking Blake) And it will be epic. (Aside to Brown) What kind of catchphrase is that?
Brown: YOU’RE gonna tell people about catchphrases?
Russell: Oh, bite me Brown.
Brown: (Getting back to the interview) You brought up walking out the TV champion, what about the champ, Kaylyn James Evans.
Russell: KJE, the newest Playboy centerfold. (Aside to Brown) Man, Hef must be gettin’ desperate for hoochies to drop trou. (Getting more personal with Brown) I mean, I’m sure you’ve gotta browser history that’ll make a sailor blush with shame. Hell, I’d put good money that yours has a bunch of sailors on it, don’t it Hank? *Brown steps back, appalled and offended by the insinuation made. Russell turns back to the camera* Calm down squirt. Don’t get your panties in a bunch. (Back to the camera) Kaylyn, you say you are “The Perfect Ten”. Really?! Well, I ‘spose maybe in your prime or up here in Pennsylvania because I don’t know whether I gotta newer model or just the Texas Edition, either way, *motioning at Annabelle* I gotta much better version. You know why? *pointing at the camera* You may be a ten, but (In a fake British accent) this one goes to eleven. (Back in his regular voice to Annabelle) Go ahead, give ‘em a preview of the goods. *Russell holds Annabelle’s hand high in the air as she does a slow 360 for the camera. Russell looks over to Hank Brown, whose mouth is hanging wide open.* (To Brown while fanning him) Breathe Hank! Breathe! *Brown shakes his head to get rid of the cobwebs as Annabelle just smirks. Russell pulls his arm down and breathes on his fingers.* OOO, too hot to handle. (Aside to Brown) I mean, come on, can’t top that, can ya?
Brown: (Stammering for words) Well…ummmm…uhhhh…
Russell: (Back to the camera) I think that says it all. And Kaylyn, not only do I have the best lookin’ woman in not only professional wrestling, but the entire world, in my corner, but when I get into the ring with you, which I’m sure what you’ve been waiting for since I got here…*Annabelle slaps his arm* (To Annabelle) What?! It’s her, not me. *Annabelle rolls her eyes* (Back to camera again) Anyway, when you get in the ring with me, you’ll realize that I am the class of the professional wrestling world. And sweetie, it doesn’t matter to me how big or little you are, how long you’ve had the belt, or how many backstage *looking at Brown before giving air quotes* “matches” you’ve had to keep that title, I’ll show you why this is man’s game and why I am on my way to becoming the greatest wrestler of all-time.
Brown: *Looking at his watch* Alright, let’s wrap this up.
Russell: (To Brown) Don’t rush me Brown? I’ll get out of here when I damn well please. (Back to the camera once again) You know, I love to surround myself with beautiful things; (growing in excitement and volume with everything he lists) beautiful cars, beautiful clothes, *pulling in Annabelle* beautiful women, (slowing and quieting down) but I am missing something. (softly, but with growing intensity with each statement) Ryan, Kaylyn, you’ve seen me each of the past three Mondays. You know, when I step into that ring, I am as good as gold, and come this Monday, I’m gonna prove that to everyone out there. And *pointing at the camera* THAT…*looking at Brown then back at the camera with the same Morris smirk. He continues in a medium-volume but still intense voice.* is just the way it is.
*Russell and Annabelle walk off camera arm-in-arm. Hank Brown watches them leave then looks back at the camera.*
Brown: Russell Morris, seemingly ready for his TV title shot this Monday at Slam.
