Post by russellmorris on Jul 1, 2011 0:08:33 GMT -5
*Hank Brown is standing on the tarmac at the Lancaster Airport. A Cessna Citation taxis down the runway towards the terminal. As it approaches, we see a “Lone Star III” on the nose of the plan with a small Texas state flag next to it. Brown trots towards the door as the plane finally stops. The ground crew hurries over to open the door. Hank Brown stands at the bottom of the steps, ready to interview one of the WCF’s newest wrestlers. Russell emerges from the plane. He buttons the jacket of his new Hugo Boss pinstripe suit with his shirt’s two top buttons undone. He reaches into his inner jacket pocket and puts on his Ray-Bans while making his way down the stairs onto the tarmac.*
Brown: Ladies and gentlemen, we are here with one of the newest members of the WCF roster, “Magnificent” Russell Morris. Well, Russell, I was just wondering…
*Before Hank Brown can finish his question, Annabelle emerges from the plane and hangs off of Russell’s shoulder.*
Russell: Whatcha need babe?
Annabelle: Crew is wondering where to put the luggage.
Russell: Take ‘em over to the car. Lemme take care of this and I’ll be right over, alright?
Annabelle: Alright.
*The two give each other a little peck. She calls back to the crew to show them where to put the luggage. As she walks by Russell gooses her, causing her to jump with a soft screech, then a big grin as she looks back at Russell. He realizes Hank Brown has been standing there the whole time.*
Russell: Alright man, whatchu wanna know ‘bout me?
Brown: Well, first of all, *curious* is this jet yours?
Russell: Do you honestly think the grandson of A. John Morris, the founder of South Plains Oil, would EVER travel with these filthy people here in the northeast. Yeah, didn’t think so.
Brown: Well, Russell, how do you feel you are ready for WCF?
Russell: Really?! Are you serious Brown? You are in the presence of the hottest free agent commodity in the professional wrestling world and you are asking if I’m ready for WCF? The better question, do you think they are ready for me? And that would be a resounding HELL no!
Brown: But Russell, you are in a match with five other combatants. Certainly you have to feel a little vulnerable with those kind of odds in winning.
Russell: Well, let’s take a look at brothas they put me in the match with. First we got, “Da Funk”. Yeah, his mama “Give up da” and his daddy “Bringin’ da” must be so proud of their little funker. Boy, you ain’t got no sense, hoppin’ ‘round like a damn fool because I guess it gives you that…”funky” feelin’ inside. Who’s next? *Looking down at the card in Hank Brown’s hand* Oh, Tek, *mockingly* “The Legend Thriller”. Brother, you wouldn’t be able to thrill a whore with 500 bucks hangin’ out your fly. Both these boys are just left coast losers who don’t know how a real professional should look, should dress, should act in and out of the ring.
Brown: Okay. What about the other man making his debut in this match, Paul Montuori?
Russell: From what I see here, he’s from Long Island, strike one. He’s some hippy-lookin’ brotha. Strike two. And, at the end of the day, when you are making your debut with the man who will one day be known as the greatest wrestler in the world. Sorry ‘bout that Paulie, but that is strike three.
Brown: *almost puzzled that someone could be so self-assured without proving anything to anyone* Umm…what about Creeping Death? CERTAINLY, you have to have made plans regarding him.
Russell: You know, I’ll give the devil his due. Creeping Death is a great in-ring competitor. He brought himself into this match and I am glad he did because I respect the man…but that doesn’t mean I have to like him. *Morris begins looking off into the sky like he is having a vision of what his future holds* Me and Creeping Death will undoubtedly be the final two competitors standing and I look forward to writing my name in the history books as the man, who on his first night, not only took Creeping Death to the limit, he beat CD on his way to be the top dog that WCF had ever seen.
Brown: *struggling to come up with anything to try and regain control of this interview* Well, umm… guess that only means there is one man left is Shadow. Have you heard some of the things Shadow’s manager Blair said about you?
Russell: Well, I sure did. I heard that loudmouth Brit try to run me down. He starts spoutin’ off all these reasons why “I’m not really from where I’m from.” Yeah, when I’m gonna get called out on how “Park Cities” and “Texas” I am, its gonna be by some limey, tea-suckin’ bastard.
Blair, I know, like everyone else in this country, you wish you could have just a day to experience the life I have. To wake up everyday with the most beautiful woman in the world *motioning towards the car off camera Annabelle went to* in the bed with you. To walk into a finely furnished house from your bedroom. Walk outside and drive the nicest cars to the finest clothiers and get the world’s finest clothes custom-tailored to your body, even though I don’t think Hugo Boss has a Squat and Fat shop. *Russell chuckles to himself* You see, I live the life that you want. The life you think you NEED. But lemme tell you this, you will never, EVER be able to live anywhere close to the one I live. Courtside at an NBA Finals game, luxury suites to the World Series, a field-level club for America’s Team AND the Super Bowl. I know that someone from England watches a sport, well, that’s too generous for a game I could master at 4 years old, a game that is beneath all of these, and certainly, not one I sully my day with caring about. I live the life everyone wants and no one but me can ever dream of. And that…is just the way it is! *Morris begins to walk off camera but catches himself* OH! One more thing. I’m a Longhorn born, a Longhorn bred, and when I die I’ll be Longhorn dead. And for that little stunt with “Horns down” your little mist-spewing karate kid has earned him one hellacious, Texas-sized ass whuppin’. And when I’m done with him Blair, I’m coming for you. Because y’all have messed with the bull, and now *holding up the “Hook ‘em Horns”* you get the Horns.
*Morris walks off camera and gets in the back of the waiting Cadillac with Annabelle. The car speeds off once the door closes*
Brown: *Shaking his head to the side, almost in disbelief of the arrogance* Confidence, certainly not lacking in the newest WCF wrestler “Magnificent” Russell Morris.
Brown: Ladies and gentlemen, we are here with one of the newest members of the WCF roster, “Magnificent” Russell Morris. Well, Russell, I was just wondering…
*Before Hank Brown can finish his question, Annabelle emerges from the plane and hangs off of Russell’s shoulder.*
Russell: Whatcha need babe?
Annabelle: Crew is wondering where to put the luggage.
Russell: Take ‘em over to the car. Lemme take care of this and I’ll be right over, alright?
Annabelle: Alright.
*The two give each other a little peck. She calls back to the crew to show them where to put the luggage. As she walks by Russell gooses her, causing her to jump with a soft screech, then a big grin as she looks back at Russell. He realizes Hank Brown has been standing there the whole time.*
Russell: Alright man, whatchu wanna know ‘bout me?
Brown: Well, first of all, *curious* is this jet yours?
Russell: Do you honestly think the grandson of A. John Morris, the founder of South Plains Oil, would EVER travel with these filthy people here in the northeast. Yeah, didn’t think so.
Brown: Well, Russell, how do you feel you are ready for WCF?
Russell: Really?! Are you serious Brown? You are in the presence of the hottest free agent commodity in the professional wrestling world and you are asking if I’m ready for WCF? The better question, do you think they are ready for me? And that would be a resounding HELL no!
Brown: But Russell, you are in a match with five other combatants. Certainly you have to feel a little vulnerable with those kind of odds in winning.
Russell: Well, let’s take a look at brothas they put me in the match with. First we got, “Da Funk”. Yeah, his mama “Give up da” and his daddy “Bringin’ da” must be so proud of their little funker. Boy, you ain’t got no sense, hoppin’ ‘round like a damn fool because I guess it gives you that…”funky” feelin’ inside. Who’s next? *Looking down at the card in Hank Brown’s hand* Oh, Tek, *mockingly* “The Legend Thriller”. Brother, you wouldn’t be able to thrill a whore with 500 bucks hangin’ out your fly. Both these boys are just left coast losers who don’t know how a real professional should look, should dress, should act in and out of the ring.
Brown: Okay. What about the other man making his debut in this match, Paul Montuori?
Russell: From what I see here, he’s from Long Island, strike one. He’s some hippy-lookin’ brotha. Strike two. And, at the end of the day, when you are making your debut with the man who will one day be known as the greatest wrestler in the world. Sorry ‘bout that Paulie, but that is strike three.
Brown: *almost puzzled that someone could be so self-assured without proving anything to anyone* Umm…what about Creeping Death? CERTAINLY, you have to have made plans regarding him.
Russell: You know, I’ll give the devil his due. Creeping Death is a great in-ring competitor. He brought himself into this match and I am glad he did because I respect the man…but that doesn’t mean I have to like him. *Morris begins looking off into the sky like he is having a vision of what his future holds* Me and Creeping Death will undoubtedly be the final two competitors standing and I look forward to writing my name in the history books as the man, who on his first night, not only took Creeping Death to the limit, he beat CD on his way to be the top dog that WCF had ever seen.
Brown: *struggling to come up with anything to try and regain control of this interview* Well, umm… guess that only means there is one man left is Shadow. Have you heard some of the things Shadow’s manager Blair said about you?
Russell: Well, I sure did. I heard that loudmouth Brit try to run me down. He starts spoutin’ off all these reasons why “I’m not really from where I’m from.” Yeah, when I’m gonna get called out on how “Park Cities” and “Texas” I am, its gonna be by some limey, tea-suckin’ bastard.
Blair, I know, like everyone else in this country, you wish you could have just a day to experience the life I have. To wake up everyday with the most beautiful woman in the world *motioning towards the car off camera Annabelle went to* in the bed with you. To walk into a finely furnished house from your bedroom. Walk outside and drive the nicest cars to the finest clothiers and get the world’s finest clothes custom-tailored to your body, even though I don’t think Hugo Boss has a Squat and Fat shop. *Russell chuckles to himself* You see, I live the life that you want. The life you think you NEED. But lemme tell you this, you will never, EVER be able to live anywhere close to the one I live. Courtside at an NBA Finals game, luxury suites to the World Series, a field-level club for America’s Team AND the Super Bowl. I know that someone from England watches a sport, well, that’s too generous for a game I could master at 4 years old, a game that is beneath all of these, and certainly, not one I sully my day with caring about. I live the life everyone wants and no one but me can ever dream of. And that…is just the way it is! *Morris begins to walk off camera but catches himself* OH! One more thing. I’m a Longhorn born, a Longhorn bred, and when I die I’ll be Longhorn dead. And for that little stunt with “Horns down” your little mist-spewing karate kid has earned him one hellacious, Texas-sized ass whuppin’. And when I’m done with him Blair, I’m coming for you. Because y’all have messed with the bull, and now *holding up the “Hook ‘em Horns”* you get the Horns.
*Morris walks off camera and gets in the back of the waiting Cadillac with Annabelle. The car speeds off once the door closes*
Brown: *Shaking his head to the side, almost in disbelief of the arrogance* Confidence, certainly not lacking in the newest WCF wrestler “Magnificent” Russell Morris.
