Post by Steve Thunder on Jun 27, 2011 13:05:34 GMT -5
A Voice in my Head.
Recollecting; I look back. I remember the toils of the past, the desperation I felt as I gasped for my final breaths as my father threw me against the wall. I recall upon the fact that my father beat me, and showed me how to take a beating and come back stronger. I still look back wondering, if at ten years old, I would have stood up and hit my father back, would I be here today?
And so I advance, I move on to the point in which my maturity level had raised, I move to a point in which my whole family had been blessed enough to win a large sum of money. However, my mother had died. She was murdered, it was clear. Probably over my father’s debt or even my father’s doing. My father since, had multiple opportunities to whip my ass in to shape, and he knew an opportunity, so he did. I was bruised each day, but it was all worth it in the end.
It’s worth it now.
Have you ever wondered how I, Steve Thunder, became me? Have you ever questioned what brought me to the dance? Have you ever pondered upon the fact that nothing you ever come up with, quite makes enough sense as to why I am here? Don’t you ever question, what my life altering moment was, what was it like? Maybe I should show you. Maybe I should look back on that, reflect on that one fateful day, that one day when, after all the money we won, and the house we bought, I altered my own life, in a very different way. I altered my life in a way in which you can only alter yourself. I twisted my own fate and made my life exactly what it is today, in one day, in one moment.
One Split Second.
My life was drastically changed after my mother was killed. I had nobody there for support. I had a cocaine and heroin addicted father, who used practically every penny of our money that we won on drugs and houses to sell drugs from. He never cared that we needed new clothes, new sofas, just what he wanted. Anything we wanted was only a dream; anything my father wanted was a harsh reality. Strictly speaking, we didn’t win the money.
My FATHER did.
He knew that with money, he could get away with murder and child abuse, and he made me suffer his wrath every day as he beat me down for no reason. Perhaps boredom was an often occurring problem in my father’s life, what else triggers child abuse?
Nothing I can think of for him.
I no longer fear my father, I no longer need to. I stopped fearing my father when I was seventeen, on that one fateful day, my one life altering moment. The first time in a long time that I felt free was on that day.
What was that Day?
You’re soon to see. My life altering moment came in the summer of two thousand and three, when I was seventeen years old. Only eight years ago. Fear still runs through my veins, about just what the consequences of my actions will be. I don’t know, I don’t think I want to, I just know that my life alteration came on that one day, and whether I liked it or not, it couldn’t be changed.
Allow me to take you back to two thousand and three, allow me to take you back to when I was seventeen years old, when I wasn’t Steve Thunder the superstar, when I wasn’t Steve Thunder the millionaire, but when I was Steve Spencer, the guy whose parents won a lot of money.
Regular Guy; Regular Steve.
The twisted illusions shall now all be shattered as I reflect on what’s happened to me over the course of those eight years. I will not bore you with the story, I will however take you back to the summer of two thousand and three.
That One Fateful Day...
That One Life Alteration...
That One Split Second...
The Scene Finally Opens.
This time the scene looks more familiar, being only two thousand and three. Graffiti is on every wall, and litter is spread so vastly across the side of the road and the side paths that it is barely recognisable. The society is bleak, there isn’t very many people in sight. However it does look like we are on private property. It looks like we are at somebodies mansion, in somebodies yard.
Looking around we see that there is a very large amount of land, something, or some amount that would most certainly be very difficult to fill out. However it’s been done. Whoever lived here had done a very good job of filling the area of land with masses of junk, nothing of any use. It seems that they were "Rich Slobs" the kind of people who are worth a lot of money, but do nothing to keep it that way.
Fade to Black.
Shoot back Up.
We are now at a school, and in the near distance we can see what looks like a younger Steve Thunder, or Steve Spencer as he was known then by his real name, not too young to be unrecognisable, but not old enough to be current day. Thunder looks around seventeen years old, and we presume that’s his age. He is standing with an attractive young woman, who to our knowledge is Carmen, but that’s not a certainty.
Thunder has a hold of the young woman with adoration in his eyes, as he holds her like she is everything to him. He grabs hold of her hand as they begin to walk down the street, at a somewhat slow pace, they don’t talk, just walk.
The two stop for a few moments, as they reach a nearby fountain, the young woman watches it, as though it’s the most beautiful thing in the world, and it seems as though Thunder is looking at the girl with that same look. She obviously means a lot to him, to be looking at her like that anyway.
If the girl, is as we believe Carmen then it is worth noting that Thunder is no longer with Carmen but that is most certainly a part of the story that will be told at a later date. As the girl looks away from the fountain she stands on her toes and kisses Thunder gently on the lips as he looks down smiling at her. The two then take one last glance over toward the fountain and begin to walk a little more, they then reach a house.
The house seems to be very well kept, very tidy. As the two stand outside the gate of the house they stare at each other. The two finally kiss after a few brief words. Thunder then holds onto the girls hand as she tries to walk away and pulls her back to him, showing us that he really doesn’t want to let her go. Is that his first love? If so then it is certainly Carmen.
Thunder speaks after a little smile.
Steve Thunder: Don’t go, Carmen. You can come back to my house can’t you? It’s only like four thirty; your parents won’t mind.
That’s me and Carmen. We were so happy back then and I never wanted to leave her side, that’s why I pulled her back. Every time I looked down on her I knew I had something so special and so unbelievable that I had to keep it, and for a long time I did. Carmen and I aren’t together any more, but this day is the one day that truly changed my life.
Thunder innocently smiles at Carmen as she looks back at him, smiling herself.
Carmen moves in and kisses Thunder again and then takes a step back, still holding his hand, and speaks.
Carmen: No, I have to go. I told my parents I would get home early today, and thanks to you I am already later than I said I would be. So, no. I will see you later on anyway; you’re coming round, right?
Steve Thunder: Yeah. But I wanna see you now... and later, too.
Thunder began to put on a little act of being upset as Carmen smiled at him. He then laughed and kissed Carmen, letting go of her hand as she walked towards her house. Thunder watched her all the way to her door and shouted out.
Steve Thunder: See ya tonight, baby!
Carmen froze and turned around giggling she asked Thunder to keep it down, but blew him a kiss while she still could, before her parents saw. Carmen walked inside her house and just as she was shutting the door she came back outside quickly.
Carmen: Go... Don’t wait here!
Carmen and Thunder laughed as Carmen went inside. Thunder then began walking away from the house, kicking a stone along the way.
Thunder kicked the stone too far though and it landed in the road. He went to get it. As he reached the stone, with no cars around he quickly looked past the stone as he spotted a shiny, long silver chain. He walked over to it and grabbed it.
Thunder began to examine the chain as he walked back to the path and began to continue on his journey home. Along the way Thunder was spinning the chain and just generally making the best of what he could do when he was walking alone.
I have always been able to make fun from anything, I was brought up with nothing, so every a piece of candy could be fun to me, and this chain was just passing the time fantastically. That chain is the one item that helped me in my life changing moments, it helped to shape what I am today. When I picked that chain up off the ground, I had no idea the impact it would make on my life. I had no idea what it would bring me to.
Thunder walks on, ignoring everything and everyone around him; he just kept walking on and trying to get home. Realising that he was almost home, Thunder spun the chain a final time and then wrapped it around his hand and smiled.
Thunder began to walk a little slower as he reached his gate, and as he was about to open it he paused.
Realising that he was at his own house he shook off the thought that he wasn’t used to this life yet.
By this life I mean, he was now living in a house of unbelievably large size and his Father owned a white Porsche. With the assets that Thunder now had in his life, he often froze and wondered exactly how it became that way, but it was simple... A lottery win.
I never wanted a life of luxury, I mean sure it was nice but at the end of the day, by the time we had the money my Mother had died and my Father was beating me every day because my Mum wasn’t there for me anymore. When I got home every day I wondered what would be waiting for me. A leather strap? A fist or two? A bottle of beer to the head? I was on edge for years.
Thunder opens the gate slowly and then begins to walk up the path at a somewhat normal speed, looking left and right occasionally. Thunder then reaches the door of his house and stands there; he lets out a deep breath and then opens the door.
Steve Thunder: I'm Home! Dad? Hello... I'M HOME!
Thunder didn’t receive an answer and for Thunder this was unusual because it meant he had no clue which way his Father would come. For all Thunder knew his Father could be dead in the living room because he took an overdose of Heroin or something.
If my Father didn’t answer, I didn’t care, I wasn’t waiting for an answer, I just went upstairs. I couldn’t wait; I couldn’t risk it. I was always worried about where my Father was because if he was in front of me at least I could avoid the hits, but what if he was behind me? What if he was waiting to beat me up? What if he had a knife and be was ready to jump out and stab me until I die?
Thunder looked left... Looked right and then ran upstairs and to his room, closing the door behind him Thunder stood there with a relieved look on his face. Not for long though, the phone rang. Thunder answered it quickly.
Steve Thunder: Hello? Who is it?
Thunder spoke with nerves in his voice as he waited for a response that seemed to take an eternity to come.
Voice: Its Carmen. I’m bored, I wanted to call you, baby. What’s wrong? You seem out of breath.
Steve Thunder: Yeah I ran upstairs. I needed the bathroom really bad.
Carmen: Okay then, have you been now? Or do you need to go?
Thunder never told Carmen what his Father did to him; he never felt that she should hear that.
Carmen: Ste?
Steve Thunder: Err... Hello... Yeah Carmen... Sorry I didn’t hear ya..
Carmen: Have you been to the bathroom?
Thunder ‘s eyes close with a light hearted smile as Carmen lets out a little laugh at Thunder being so out of it.
Thunder replies.
Steve Thunder: Yeah, I went as soon as I got home.
Carmen: Okay good... Is it okay if I come over? I’m really bored.
Steve Thunder: Are you sure you want to? My Dad will be home soon..
It goes silent for a moment.
Carmen: Of course I want to come over, can I?
Steve Thunder: Err... Yeah sure, okay. I'll see ya in say ten minutes?
Carmen: Yeah. About that...
Thunder and Carmen exchange their good byes and then Thunder hangs up the phone with a half-smile on his face.
I wanted Carmen there; I wanted somebody who could be there and not care that my Father was there, because she didn’t know what he did to me. I also didn’t want Carmen there because I didn’t want her to see how my Father, Chris by the way, acted toward me. I didn’t want her to see him kick my ass from wall to wall around the house because he was wasted.
Thunder went and lay down on his bed, and closed his eyes imaging what life without his Fathers asshole behaviours would be like.
As Thunder lay with closed eyes, he heard the door slam. The same way in which his Father slammed the door after a night out with his friends, in which he had not come home. Sure enough within ten seconds of the door shutting Thunder heard the shout of his Father that he had been longing not to hear.
Chris: Boy... Where are you, boy?!
Steve Thunder: I'm upstairs in my room!
Chris: Well then get your ass down here, I have something for you!
Thunder wasn’t stupid enough for that trick, he knew what his Father had for him, a right hook that’s what.
Even though Thunder knew what was coming he got up from his bed and walk to the door of his bedroom and opened it, slowly. Thunder then closed the door slowly and walked downstairs. As Thunder reached the bottom step of the stairs there was a knock at the door.
Thunder went straight to the door, seeing his Father to his left sat in his chair.
It was Carmen.
An angel is disguise. She had saved me from a beating, but I didn’t want her to save me, I wanted her to get out of harm’s way. I wanted my girlfriend to stay away from all this.
Carmen: Hey, baby.
Steve Thunder: Hey... Come in, go right upstairs.
Carmen: Oh... It’s like that today huh?
Carmen smiles and then walks inside Thunders house and kisses him, walking upstairs.
Steve Thunder: I'll be up in a while Carmen, I gotta talk to my Dad.
Carmen smiles and then continues upstairs as Thunders Father walks into the kitchen, brushing right by Thunder, who follows him to the kitchen.
Steve Thunder: What do you want, Dad?
Thunders Father snaps his head round.
Steve Thunder: What?!
Chris: Who do you think you’re talking to?!
Thunders Father grew a sick grin that spread across his face. As Thunder stood looking at his Father and impatiently waiting for his Father to answer he was tapping his chain with his fingers by closing his hand and then opening it.
I was getting so annoyed, how could he stand there and completely ignore what I was saying, and still have a sick grin across his face at the same time? How could he stand there and act as though he wasn’t planning something, knowing that he was..
Thunders Father began to walk over to Thunder with that sick grin slowly fading to an angry expression.
I wanted to walk away and stay out of him hitting me but I couldn’t. I froze. I knew that I had to stand my ground and take the beating like a man, however bad it was... However much it hurt.
Chris: Listen to me, boy. YOU do not question ME! I wanted to give you something, but since your little slut of a girlfriend has shown up I don’t think I will be able to give it to you anymore. I think you will have to wait until later for it.
I didn’t want it later, I wanted him to get it over with, the drinking had finally caught up to him and he was probably unable to even hit me. I wasn’t waiting though; I wasn’t waiting for Carmen to leave. Why postpone the pain?
Thunder looked at his Father and in an attempt to anger him enough to get it over with Thunder spoke up.
Steve Thunder: Why? What’s wrong, Dad? All that drinking, and drug using, catching up on you? Can’t you do it?
Chris: Oh I can do it, boy! I don’t have any problems, and I will show you right now if that’s how you want it!
Steve Thunder: Hey, now I never said I wanted to get my ass kicked every day, but did that ever stop you?!
Chris: YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!
Steve Thunder: NO YOU LISTEN TO ME!
Thunders Father took a step back in realisation that his Son was ready to finally be a man, to finally stand up to him and stop the pain.
Chris: Don’t you ever talk to me like that you little fucker! I will come over there and beat the living shit out of you next time you EVER speak to me like that… You got that, BOY?!
Oh I had it all logged. I was trying to make him hit me, I knew he wouldn’t, I knew he was too wasted to hit me. I was toying with him the way he toyed with me for seventeen years. I was provoking him, and I knew it was causing him as much pain as he caused me in knowing that he COULDN’T hit me, for once in his life.
Chris: I said... Have you got that, BO---
Thunder cuts his Father off, which brings even more anger to his Fathers eyes.
Steve Thunder: Yeah. I know what you said.
Chris: Well...
Thunder lets out a small grin, sensing it was all working.
I knew this was eating my Father up, or at least I thought it was.
Steve Thunder: Yeah, I got you, Dad.
Chris: Are you GOING to speak to me like that again?!
Steve Thunder: No, Dad... I won’t.
Thunder laughed, not even realising he was doing so. Thunders Father grew angry in the belief that Thunder was ignoring him.
Steve Thunder: Probably...
Chris: THAT’S IT!
Thunders Father walked over to him and got right in Thunders face.
Chris: You want to start a fight with me, BOY? Well you've done it... Come on, let’s see what you got!
Thunder looked at his Father.
Chris: What?! What are you looking at? Hit me! Come on, LETS FIGHT!
I wasn’t going to satisfy that asshole, he didn’t deserve me hitting him, I didn’t want to give in the way he wanted me to.
Thunder looked his Father dead in the eyes.
Steve Thunder: I aint gonna fight you, Dad. You’re too drunk.
Thunders Father grabbed a hold of Thunders throat and pushed him up against the wall, giving Thunder enough air to speak.
Steve Thunder: Get the hell... Off me, Dad.
Chris: Why don’t you get me off you?
Steve Thunder: I said I aint gonna hit you and I aint.
Thunders Father, keeping hold of Thunders throat, let out a laugh.
I don’t know why he was laughing, I mean I do now, but then I was worried he seemed insane. He was laughing at my terminology… Which in my eyes is absolutely no reason to be laughing?
Chris stopped laughing as he looked into Thunders eyes.
Chris: Oh you 'aint gonna' hit me?
Thunder pushed his Father away.
Steve Thunder: No! I AINT!
Thunder looked his Father up and Down with disgrace on his face.
Steve Thunder: Look at you.
Thunder paused.
Steve Thunder: Your pathetic!
Chris: YOU SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH RIGHT NOW!
Steve Thunder: No.
Thunder gave a cocky grin.
Chris: Don’t you look at me like that.
Steve Thunder: Fine I won’t look at you at all, asshole.
Chris: What did you call me?!
Thunder stands up straight and grins again, as we see where the cockiness comes from.
Steve Thunder: You heard me…
Chris: Yeah I did…
Thunder looked at his Father one last time, waiting for more, but he got nothing. Thunder turned away and tried to walk away.
As Thunder walked his Father grabbed his shoulder and span him around, as he was facing his Father again, Thunders Father hit him across the face with a brutal right hand, sending Thunder crashing down.
Thunders Father looked down on him and smiled and then began to walk towards the kitchen table.
Steve Thunder: Where are you going? That all you got?
Chris does not turn to face Thunder but instead stops dead in his tracks and replies.
Chris: Oh I have a lot more than that…
Chris stands there, and unknown to him Thunder is getting up.
Thunder makes it to his feet with anger in his face and walks over to his Father.
Thunder puts a hand on his Fathers left shoulder and spins him around to face him, as his Father turns, at a rather fast speed Thunder lashes out with his right hand, and as he does it connects with his Fathers face sending his father falling backwards. As his Father falls Thunder looks at his Right Hand realising that his hand still had the chain wrapped around it.
Steve Thunder: …………………
Thunder s Father continued to fall and then as he was he hit his head on the corner of the table, which made his head snap up, a potential killer way to fall. Thunder looked down on his fallen Father as he was bleeding from the back and front of his head, and not moving at all… Not even his chest was moving from breath.
What had I done?! Had I killed my Father? I think so, I killed my Father. I was speechless, so I didn’t speak I just did what most people would do.
Thunder looked at his Father one last time, and then walked to the table himself, he looked around it and then grabbed something. Thunder ran to the front door and looked at the stairs remembering Carmen was upstairs.
Thunder closed his eyes for a moment and then opened the front door and ran out of it to the Porsche that his Father owned. He put a set of keys in and opened the door, he then started the engine and sped away as his Father lay dead in the kitchen and his girlfriend was left clueless in his bedroom.
Fade to Black.
Recollecting; I look back. I remember the toils of the past, the desperation I felt as I gasped for my final breaths as my father threw me against the wall. I recall upon the fact that my father beat me, and showed me how to take a beating and come back stronger. I still look back wondering, if at ten years old, I would have stood up and hit my father back, would I be here today?
And so I advance, I move on to the point in which my maturity level had raised, I move to a point in which my whole family had been blessed enough to win a large sum of money. However, my mother had died. She was murdered, it was clear. Probably over my father’s debt or even my father’s doing. My father since, had multiple opportunities to whip my ass in to shape, and he knew an opportunity, so he did. I was bruised each day, but it was all worth it in the end.
It’s worth it now.
Have you ever wondered how I, Steve Thunder, became me? Have you ever questioned what brought me to the dance? Have you ever pondered upon the fact that nothing you ever come up with, quite makes enough sense as to why I am here? Don’t you ever question, what my life altering moment was, what was it like? Maybe I should show you. Maybe I should look back on that, reflect on that one fateful day, that one day when, after all the money we won, and the house we bought, I altered my own life, in a very different way. I altered my life in a way in which you can only alter yourself. I twisted my own fate and made my life exactly what it is today, in one day, in one moment.
One Split Second.
My life was drastically changed after my mother was killed. I had nobody there for support. I had a cocaine and heroin addicted father, who used practically every penny of our money that we won on drugs and houses to sell drugs from. He never cared that we needed new clothes, new sofas, just what he wanted. Anything we wanted was only a dream; anything my father wanted was a harsh reality. Strictly speaking, we didn’t win the money.
My FATHER did.
He knew that with money, he could get away with murder and child abuse, and he made me suffer his wrath every day as he beat me down for no reason. Perhaps boredom was an often occurring problem in my father’s life, what else triggers child abuse?
Nothing I can think of for him.
I no longer fear my father, I no longer need to. I stopped fearing my father when I was seventeen, on that one fateful day, my one life altering moment. The first time in a long time that I felt free was on that day.
What was that Day?
You’re soon to see. My life altering moment came in the summer of two thousand and three, when I was seventeen years old. Only eight years ago. Fear still runs through my veins, about just what the consequences of my actions will be. I don’t know, I don’t think I want to, I just know that my life alteration came on that one day, and whether I liked it or not, it couldn’t be changed.
Allow me to take you back to two thousand and three, allow me to take you back to when I was seventeen years old, when I wasn’t Steve Thunder the superstar, when I wasn’t Steve Thunder the millionaire, but when I was Steve Spencer, the guy whose parents won a lot of money.
Regular Guy; Regular Steve.
The twisted illusions shall now all be shattered as I reflect on what’s happened to me over the course of those eight years. I will not bore you with the story, I will however take you back to the summer of two thousand and three.
That One Fateful Day...
That One Life Alteration...
That One Split Second...
.:: My Past – The Childhood – Part I ::.
The Scene Finally Opens.
This time the scene looks more familiar, being only two thousand and three. Graffiti is on every wall, and litter is spread so vastly across the side of the road and the side paths that it is barely recognisable. The society is bleak, there isn’t very many people in sight. However it does look like we are on private property. It looks like we are at somebodies mansion, in somebodies yard.
Looking around we see that there is a very large amount of land, something, or some amount that would most certainly be very difficult to fill out. However it’s been done. Whoever lived here had done a very good job of filling the area of land with masses of junk, nothing of any use. It seems that they were "Rich Slobs" the kind of people who are worth a lot of money, but do nothing to keep it that way.
Fade to Black.
Shoot back Up.
We are now at a school, and in the near distance we can see what looks like a younger Steve Thunder, or Steve Spencer as he was known then by his real name, not too young to be unrecognisable, but not old enough to be current day. Thunder looks around seventeen years old, and we presume that’s his age. He is standing with an attractive young woman, who to our knowledge is Carmen, but that’s not a certainty.
Thunder has a hold of the young woman with adoration in his eyes, as he holds her like she is everything to him. He grabs hold of her hand as they begin to walk down the street, at a somewhat slow pace, they don’t talk, just walk.
The two stop for a few moments, as they reach a nearby fountain, the young woman watches it, as though it’s the most beautiful thing in the world, and it seems as though Thunder is looking at the girl with that same look. She obviously means a lot to him, to be looking at her like that anyway.
If the girl, is as we believe Carmen then it is worth noting that Thunder is no longer with Carmen but that is most certainly a part of the story that will be told at a later date. As the girl looks away from the fountain she stands on her toes and kisses Thunder gently on the lips as he looks down smiling at her. The two then take one last glance over toward the fountain and begin to walk a little more, they then reach a house.
The house seems to be very well kept, very tidy. As the two stand outside the gate of the house they stare at each other. The two finally kiss after a few brief words. Thunder then holds onto the girls hand as she tries to walk away and pulls her back to him, showing us that he really doesn’t want to let her go. Is that his first love? If so then it is certainly Carmen.
Thunder speaks after a little smile.
Steve Thunder: Don’t go, Carmen. You can come back to my house can’t you? It’s only like four thirty; your parents won’t mind.
That’s me and Carmen. We were so happy back then and I never wanted to leave her side, that’s why I pulled her back. Every time I looked down on her I knew I had something so special and so unbelievable that I had to keep it, and for a long time I did. Carmen and I aren’t together any more, but this day is the one day that truly changed my life.
Thunder innocently smiles at Carmen as she looks back at him, smiling herself.
Carmen moves in and kisses Thunder again and then takes a step back, still holding his hand, and speaks.
Carmen: No, I have to go. I told my parents I would get home early today, and thanks to you I am already later than I said I would be. So, no. I will see you later on anyway; you’re coming round, right?
Steve Thunder: Yeah. But I wanna see you now... and later, too.
Thunder began to put on a little act of being upset as Carmen smiled at him. He then laughed and kissed Carmen, letting go of her hand as she walked towards her house. Thunder watched her all the way to her door and shouted out.
Steve Thunder: See ya tonight, baby!
Carmen froze and turned around giggling she asked Thunder to keep it down, but blew him a kiss while she still could, before her parents saw. Carmen walked inside her house and just as she was shutting the door she came back outside quickly.
Carmen: Go... Don’t wait here!
Carmen and Thunder laughed as Carmen went inside. Thunder then began walking away from the house, kicking a stone along the way.
Thunder kicked the stone too far though and it landed in the road. He went to get it. As he reached the stone, with no cars around he quickly looked past the stone as he spotted a shiny, long silver chain. He walked over to it and grabbed it.
Thunder began to examine the chain as he walked back to the path and began to continue on his journey home. Along the way Thunder was spinning the chain and just generally making the best of what he could do when he was walking alone.
I have always been able to make fun from anything, I was brought up with nothing, so every a piece of candy could be fun to me, and this chain was just passing the time fantastically. That chain is the one item that helped me in my life changing moments, it helped to shape what I am today. When I picked that chain up off the ground, I had no idea the impact it would make on my life. I had no idea what it would bring me to.
Thunder walks on, ignoring everything and everyone around him; he just kept walking on and trying to get home. Realising that he was almost home, Thunder spun the chain a final time and then wrapped it around his hand and smiled.
Thunder began to walk a little slower as he reached his gate, and as he was about to open it he paused.
Realising that he was at his own house he shook off the thought that he wasn’t used to this life yet.
By this life I mean, he was now living in a house of unbelievably large size and his Father owned a white Porsche. With the assets that Thunder now had in his life, he often froze and wondered exactly how it became that way, but it was simple... A lottery win.
I never wanted a life of luxury, I mean sure it was nice but at the end of the day, by the time we had the money my Mother had died and my Father was beating me every day because my Mum wasn’t there for me anymore. When I got home every day I wondered what would be waiting for me. A leather strap? A fist or two? A bottle of beer to the head? I was on edge for years.
Thunder opens the gate slowly and then begins to walk up the path at a somewhat normal speed, looking left and right occasionally. Thunder then reaches the door of his house and stands there; he lets out a deep breath and then opens the door.
Steve Thunder: I'm Home! Dad? Hello... I'M HOME!
Thunder didn’t receive an answer and for Thunder this was unusual because it meant he had no clue which way his Father would come. For all Thunder knew his Father could be dead in the living room because he took an overdose of Heroin or something.
If my Father didn’t answer, I didn’t care, I wasn’t waiting for an answer, I just went upstairs. I couldn’t wait; I couldn’t risk it. I was always worried about where my Father was because if he was in front of me at least I could avoid the hits, but what if he was behind me? What if he was waiting to beat me up? What if he had a knife and be was ready to jump out and stab me until I die?
Thunder looked left... Looked right and then ran upstairs and to his room, closing the door behind him Thunder stood there with a relieved look on his face. Not for long though, the phone rang. Thunder answered it quickly.
Steve Thunder: Hello? Who is it?
Thunder spoke with nerves in his voice as he waited for a response that seemed to take an eternity to come.
Voice: Its Carmen. I’m bored, I wanted to call you, baby. What’s wrong? You seem out of breath.
Steve Thunder: Yeah I ran upstairs. I needed the bathroom really bad.
Carmen: Okay then, have you been now? Or do you need to go?
Thunder never told Carmen what his Father did to him; he never felt that she should hear that.
Carmen: Ste?
Steve Thunder: Err... Hello... Yeah Carmen... Sorry I didn’t hear ya..
Carmen: Have you been to the bathroom?
Thunder ‘s eyes close with a light hearted smile as Carmen lets out a little laugh at Thunder being so out of it.
Thunder replies.
Steve Thunder: Yeah, I went as soon as I got home.
Carmen: Okay good... Is it okay if I come over? I’m really bored.
Steve Thunder: Are you sure you want to? My Dad will be home soon..
It goes silent for a moment.
Carmen: Of course I want to come over, can I?
Steve Thunder: Err... Yeah sure, okay. I'll see ya in say ten minutes?
Carmen: Yeah. About that...
Thunder and Carmen exchange their good byes and then Thunder hangs up the phone with a half-smile on his face.
I wanted Carmen there; I wanted somebody who could be there and not care that my Father was there, because she didn’t know what he did to me. I also didn’t want Carmen there because I didn’t want her to see how my Father, Chris by the way, acted toward me. I didn’t want her to see him kick my ass from wall to wall around the house because he was wasted.
Thunder went and lay down on his bed, and closed his eyes imaging what life without his Fathers asshole behaviours would be like.
As Thunder lay with closed eyes, he heard the door slam. The same way in which his Father slammed the door after a night out with his friends, in which he had not come home. Sure enough within ten seconds of the door shutting Thunder heard the shout of his Father that he had been longing not to hear.
Chris: Boy... Where are you, boy?!
Steve Thunder: I'm upstairs in my room!
Chris: Well then get your ass down here, I have something for you!
Thunder wasn’t stupid enough for that trick, he knew what his Father had for him, a right hook that’s what.
Even though Thunder knew what was coming he got up from his bed and walk to the door of his bedroom and opened it, slowly. Thunder then closed the door slowly and walked downstairs. As Thunder reached the bottom step of the stairs there was a knock at the door.
Thunder went straight to the door, seeing his Father to his left sat in his chair.
It was Carmen.
An angel is disguise. She had saved me from a beating, but I didn’t want her to save me, I wanted her to get out of harm’s way. I wanted my girlfriend to stay away from all this.
Carmen: Hey, baby.
Steve Thunder: Hey... Come in, go right upstairs.
Carmen: Oh... It’s like that today huh?
Carmen smiles and then walks inside Thunders house and kisses him, walking upstairs.
Steve Thunder: I'll be up in a while Carmen, I gotta talk to my Dad.
Carmen smiles and then continues upstairs as Thunders Father walks into the kitchen, brushing right by Thunder, who follows him to the kitchen.
Steve Thunder: What do you want, Dad?
Thunders Father snaps his head round.
Steve Thunder: What?!
Chris: Who do you think you’re talking to?!
Thunders Father grew a sick grin that spread across his face. As Thunder stood looking at his Father and impatiently waiting for his Father to answer he was tapping his chain with his fingers by closing his hand and then opening it.
I was getting so annoyed, how could he stand there and completely ignore what I was saying, and still have a sick grin across his face at the same time? How could he stand there and act as though he wasn’t planning something, knowing that he was..
Thunders Father began to walk over to Thunder with that sick grin slowly fading to an angry expression.
I wanted to walk away and stay out of him hitting me but I couldn’t. I froze. I knew that I had to stand my ground and take the beating like a man, however bad it was... However much it hurt.
Chris: Listen to me, boy. YOU do not question ME! I wanted to give you something, but since your little slut of a girlfriend has shown up I don’t think I will be able to give it to you anymore. I think you will have to wait until later for it.
I didn’t want it later, I wanted him to get it over with, the drinking had finally caught up to him and he was probably unable to even hit me. I wasn’t waiting though; I wasn’t waiting for Carmen to leave. Why postpone the pain?
Thunder looked at his Father and in an attempt to anger him enough to get it over with Thunder spoke up.
Steve Thunder: Why? What’s wrong, Dad? All that drinking, and drug using, catching up on you? Can’t you do it?
Chris: Oh I can do it, boy! I don’t have any problems, and I will show you right now if that’s how you want it!
Steve Thunder: Hey, now I never said I wanted to get my ass kicked every day, but did that ever stop you?!
Chris: YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!
Steve Thunder: NO YOU LISTEN TO ME!
Thunders Father took a step back in realisation that his Son was ready to finally be a man, to finally stand up to him and stop the pain.
Chris: Don’t you ever talk to me like that you little fucker! I will come over there and beat the living shit out of you next time you EVER speak to me like that… You got that, BOY?!
Oh I had it all logged. I was trying to make him hit me, I knew he wouldn’t, I knew he was too wasted to hit me. I was toying with him the way he toyed with me for seventeen years. I was provoking him, and I knew it was causing him as much pain as he caused me in knowing that he COULDN’T hit me, for once in his life.
Chris: I said... Have you got that, BO---
Thunder cuts his Father off, which brings even more anger to his Fathers eyes.
Steve Thunder: Yeah. I know what you said.
Chris: Well...
Thunder lets out a small grin, sensing it was all working.
I knew this was eating my Father up, or at least I thought it was.
Steve Thunder: Yeah, I got you, Dad.
Chris: Are you GOING to speak to me like that again?!
Steve Thunder: No, Dad... I won’t.
Thunder laughed, not even realising he was doing so. Thunders Father grew angry in the belief that Thunder was ignoring him.
Steve Thunder: Probably...
Chris: THAT’S IT!
Thunders Father walked over to him and got right in Thunders face.
Chris: You want to start a fight with me, BOY? Well you've done it... Come on, let’s see what you got!
Thunder looked at his Father.
Chris: What?! What are you looking at? Hit me! Come on, LETS FIGHT!
I wasn’t going to satisfy that asshole, he didn’t deserve me hitting him, I didn’t want to give in the way he wanted me to.
Thunder looked his Father dead in the eyes.
Steve Thunder: I aint gonna fight you, Dad. You’re too drunk.
Thunders Father grabbed a hold of Thunders throat and pushed him up against the wall, giving Thunder enough air to speak.
Steve Thunder: Get the hell... Off me, Dad.
Chris: Why don’t you get me off you?
Steve Thunder: I said I aint gonna hit you and I aint.
Thunders Father, keeping hold of Thunders throat, let out a laugh.
I don’t know why he was laughing, I mean I do now, but then I was worried he seemed insane. He was laughing at my terminology… Which in my eyes is absolutely no reason to be laughing?
Chris stopped laughing as he looked into Thunders eyes.
Chris: Oh you 'aint gonna' hit me?
Thunder pushed his Father away.
Steve Thunder: No! I AINT!
Thunder looked his Father up and Down with disgrace on his face.
Steve Thunder: Look at you.
Thunder paused.
Steve Thunder: Your pathetic!
Chris: YOU SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH RIGHT NOW!
Steve Thunder: No.
Thunder gave a cocky grin.
Chris: Don’t you look at me like that.
Steve Thunder: Fine I won’t look at you at all, asshole.
Chris: What did you call me?!
Thunder stands up straight and grins again, as we see where the cockiness comes from.
Steve Thunder: You heard me…
Chris: Yeah I did…
Thunder looked at his Father one last time, waiting for more, but he got nothing. Thunder turned away and tried to walk away.
As Thunder walked his Father grabbed his shoulder and span him around, as he was facing his Father again, Thunders Father hit him across the face with a brutal right hand, sending Thunder crashing down.
Thunders Father looked down on him and smiled and then began to walk towards the kitchen table.
Steve Thunder: Where are you going? That all you got?
Chris does not turn to face Thunder but instead stops dead in his tracks and replies.
Chris: Oh I have a lot more than that…
Chris stands there, and unknown to him Thunder is getting up.
Thunder makes it to his feet with anger in his face and walks over to his Father.
Thunder puts a hand on his Fathers left shoulder and spins him around to face him, as his Father turns, at a rather fast speed Thunder lashes out with his right hand, and as he does it connects with his Fathers face sending his father falling backwards. As his Father falls Thunder looks at his Right Hand realising that his hand still had the chain wrapped around it.
Steve Thunder: …………………
Thunder s Father continued to fall and then as he was he hit his head on the corner of the table, which made his head snap up, a potential killer way to fall. Thunder looked down on his fallen Father as he was bleeding from the back and front of his head, and not moving at all… Not even his chest was moving from breath.
What had I done?! Had I killed my Father? I think so, I killed my Father. I was speechless, so I didn’t speak I just did what most people would do.
Thunder looked at his Father one last time, and then walked to the table himself, he looked around it and then grabbed something. Thunder ran to the front door and looked at the stairs remembering Carmen was upstairs.
Thunder closed his eyes for a moment and then opened the front door and ran out of it to the Porsche that his Father owned. He put a set of keys in and opened the door, he then started the engine and sped away as his Father lay dead in the kitchen and his girlfriend was left clueless in his bedroom.
Fade to Black.
