Debut feedback

[Matt Storm]

It came several days later than I'd planned but it's finally up. I'm sure there are some errors bc I'm roleplaying via my iPhone right now. Anywho, I'd appreciate any feedback, positive or negative, bc I want to get better. The first ones are always tough in a new fed bc nobody knows your character, but I hate those debut rps that are little more than self-congratulatory fluff over what's been achieved in other Feds. So I tried to give a little background but shy away from patting myself too hard on the back. The whole gimmick is Storm used to be the man, but that's years ago when he was much younger. Now he's just out to prove, mainly to himself, whether he's still got it or not.

So..... whaddya think?

[Deleted]

I enjoyed it. Good character with solid history. Charismatic. A man who's clearly in control of his domain. He knows where he's been. Wants to get back to the top of the mountain. Sure he's got a few dings, but you'll trade some spring in your step for the wisdom that comes with being a veteran. I thought it was very good. Matt Storm is going to be successful in WCF, I would bet on that.