Post by suicideking on Aug 26, 2006 13:17:51 GMT -5
(We open our scene to show everyone's favorite (you KNOW you love him...) anti-hero, "The Suicide King" Chad Allen. He is thankfully not riding in a friggin limo (damn original one there...) or dancing a jig in a skirt, which already makes this promo not suck. He IS however getting to the arena, wearing his "KILL YOURSELF" t-shirt (soon to be available to the public ONLINE!) and carrying his gear bag. From inside the arena steps a midget in a tux, wearing a lucha mask and carrying a mic. Our little friend speaks...)
Ladies and Gentlemen, I am the Masked Midget, and I am here to get a few words with Your New Hero, The Extreme Asshole, the one and only "Suicide King" Chad Allen. SK, we have heard from both of your opponents, the amazingly unoriginally named Thunder, and "The Wolf" Conrad Howell. All of the King's Subjects want to know what you think of your impending match?
(Chad looks the mini-announcer over for a second, chuckles, and pats him on his little head...)
Aren't you just the cutest goddamn thing? It is like they shrunk some other crappy announcer. Well Short Stuff, I think that both Thunder and and the Wolf are in for a MAJOR disappointment on the respective debuts.
Thunder, let's start with you. I want to congratulate you, for being the most unoriginal person I have ever seen, I mean, I know ol Wolfie is some Hot Rod type of thing apparently, but no one has done that in a little while. But you...YOU are riding in limos and acting all snooty to the people around you, and you have picked a name that has been used SO MANY TIMES, that everyone immediately stops caring. IN FACT, I am sure most people didn't care to start. If you are so rich and high powered, go buy a real f**kin name you suck job.
As for you Wolfman, I don't care if you are Scottish, Irish, or Swedish, you suck and people don't like you. The only reason people watch your entrance is because they think you are one of the divas at first. But once they get past the skirt and your bitch tits, they figure out that you are just one ugly chick. Now that Shanon you bring to the ring with you, that ain't bad. Maybe she will bring that nice little deerskin skirt over to the King. I would be more than happy to show her the difference between you just Riverdancing around her, and me horizontal mambo-ing on top of her.
In short, KILL YOURSELVES, it will be easier for all of us!
The King is punching out...
(With that the Suicide King bumps the Masked Midget out of the way as he heads into the arena...)
Ladies and Gentlemen, I am the Masked Midget, and I am here to get a few words with Your New Hero, The Extreme Asshole, the one and only "Suicide King" Chad Allen. SK, we have heard from both of your opponents, the amazingly unoriginally named Thunder, and "The Wolf" Conrad Howell. All of the King's Subjects want to know what you think of your impending match?
(Chad looks the mini-announcer over for a second, chuckles, and pats him on his little head...)
Aren't you just the cutest goddamn thing? It is like they shrunk some other crappy announcer. Well Short Stuff, I think that both Thunder and and the Wolf are in for a MAJOR disappointment on the respective debuts.
Thunder, let's start with you. I want to congratulate you, for being the most unoriginal person I have ever seen, I mean, I know ol Wolfie is some Hot Rod type of thing apparently, but no one has done that in a little while. But you...YOU are riding in limos and acting all snooty to the people around you, and you have picked a name that has been used SO MANY TIMES, that everyone immediately stops caring. IN FACT, I am sure most people didn't care to start. If you are so rich and high powered, go buy a real f**kin name you suck job.
As for you Wolfman, I don't care if you are Scottish, Irish, or Swedish, you suck and people don't like you. The only reason people watch your entrance is because they think you are one of the divas at first. But once they get past the skirt and your bitch tits, they figure out that you are just one ugly chick. Now that Shanon you bring to the ring with you, that ain't bad. Maybe she will bring that nice little deerskin skirt over to the King. I would be more than happy to show her the difference between you just Riverdancing around her, and me horizontal mambo-ing on top of her.
In short, KILL YOURSELVES, it will be easier for all of us!
The King is punching out...
(With that the Suicide King bumps the Masked Midget out of the way as he heads into the arena...)
