Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2006 2:09:59 GMT -5
(It's mid-afternoon. The sun is shining brightly, but the temperature is sub-freezing. A young black kid stands in front of the Quick-E-Mart, playing with his yo-yo. A tall, skinny gentleman, vaguely resembling Seinfeld star Michael Richards, approaches the young kid and begins screaming at him.)
"What are you doing with my yo-yo?! That's my yo-yo! Give me my yo-yo!"
(The man attempts to grab the yo-yo out of the kid's hand.)
"Are you crazy, man? I just bought this yo-yo. Get off of me, fool!"
(The two begin struggling in a tug of war over the tiny, plastic toy. Suddenly, WCF wrestler Bobby Cairo runs in from out of nowhere and shoves the man away from the kid.)
"Leave this young man alone! I saw him buy that yo-yo inside the store. That's his yo-yo!"
(The man seems a bit shaken and taken aback by the interference of the up-and-coming grappler, Cairo. While trying to compose himself, he manages to sputter out a few words.)
"Wh-who are you?"
"I'm Bobby Cairo, the newest recruit of the Wrestling Championship Federation! I haven't wrestled a match yet, but I expect that I will at some point in the future. Who, may I ask, are you?"
"My name is Jasper Cartwright, I'm a yo-yo enthusiast. In fact, I'm married to a yo-yo. We've been married for 16 years. That's how much I love yo-yo's."
"No shit? That's pretty crazy. Why were you trying to take this young man's yo-yo away from him?"
"I have an addiction... an addiction to yo-yo's. Whenever I see one, I must have it."
"Dude, they have a whole stack of yo-yo's inside the Quick-E-Mart. In fact, they're on sale. It's a buy 2 get 1 free special."
"Holy moly, that's the best news I've ever heard in my life. If you gentlemen will excuse me, I'm off to buy some yo-yo's."
(Jasper walks away from Bobby and the kid, and enters the store. The kid looks up at Bobby with a very relieved look on his face.)
"Thanks for your help, man. That dude was bonkers."
"No problem, it was my pleasure. What's your name, son?"
"Shawn. Shawn Wallace."
"Shawn, I want to teach you how to defend yourself the next time a crazy man harasses you."
(A crazed lunatic in a mechanic’s outfit, wielding a lead pipe, charges at Bobby. Bobby takes the man down with a drop toe-hold and locks him into a Fujiwara armbar. The man cries out in pain.)
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Phaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarg!"
"Did you see what I did there, Shawn? I fell to the ground, placing one foot at the front of this gentleman's ankle and the other in the back of his shin. Then after he fell, I quickly positioned myself at a 90-degree angle to him. I leaned on him to prevent him from moving, and then I hooked his arm and pulled back into my body. That stretches his forearm, biceps and pectoral muscles."
"Let me go, you bastard! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggh!"
(Shawn stares at Bobby in awe while the crazed-looking man struggles to break free.)
"That's the coolest shit I've ever seen, man. You kick ass!"
(Bobby finally releases the hold, and the man sighs in relief and begins rubbing his arm and shoulder.)
"I want you to give it a try now, Shawn, so that you have some experience."
(Shawn walks over to the man, kicks him in the head and locks him in the armbar.)
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Nooooooooooooooooooo!"
"That's good, Shawn. Good technique and I liked that kick to the head. That was a nice touch."
"This is fun!"
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!"
"What are you doing with my yo-yo?! That's my yo-yo! Give me my yo-yo!"
(The man attempts to grab the yo-yo out of the kid's hand.)
"Are you crazy, man? I just bought this yo-yo. Get off of me, fool!"
(The two begin struggling in a tug of war over the tiny, plastic toy. Suddenly, WCF wrestler Bobby Cairo runs in from out of nowhere and shoves the man away from the kid.)
"Leave this young man alone! I saw him buy that yo-yo inside the store. That's his yo-yo!"
(The man seems a bit shaken and taken aback by the interference of the up-and-coming grappler, Cairo. While trying to compose himself, he manages to sputter out a few words.)
"Wh-who are you?"
"I'm Bobby Cairo, the newest recruit of the Wrestling Championship Federation! I haven't wrestled a match yet, but I expect that I will at some point in the future. Who, may I ask, are you?"
"My name is Jasper Cartwright, I'm a yo-yo enthusiast. In fact, I'm married to a yo-yo. We've been married for 16 years. That's how much I love yo-yo's."
"No shit? That's pretty crazy. Why were you trying to take this young man's yo-yo away from him?"
"I have an addiction... an addiction to yo-yo's. Whenever I see one, I must have it."
"Dude, they have a whole stack of yo-yo's inside the Quick-E-Mart. In fact, they're on sale. It's a buy 2 get 1 free special."
"Holy moly, that's the best news I've ever heard in my life. If you gentlemen will excuse me, I'm off to buy some yo-yo's."
(Jasper walks away from Bobby and the kid, and enters the store. The kid looks up at Bobby with a very relieved look on his face.)
"Thanks for your help, man. That dude was bonkers."
"No problem, it was my pleasure. What's your name, son?"
"Shawn. Shawn Wallace."
"Shawn, I want to teach you how to defend yourself the next time a crazy man harasses you."
(A crazed lunatic in a mechanic’s outfit, wielding a lead pipe, charges at Bobby. Bobby takes the man down with a drop toe-hold and locks him into a Fujiwara armbar. The man cries out in pain.)
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Phaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarg!"
"Did you see what I did there, Shawn? I fell to the ground, placing one foot at the front of this gentleman's ankle and the other in the back of his shin. Then after he fell, I quickly positioned myself at a 90-degree angle to him. I leaned on him to prevent him from moving, and then I hooked his arm and pulled back into my body. That stretches his forearm, biceps and pectoral muscles."
"Let me go, you bastard! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggh!"
(Shawn stares at Bobby in awe while the crazed-looking man struggles to break free.)
"That's the coolest shit I've ever seen, man. You kick ass!"
(Bobby finally releases the hold, and the man sighs in relief and begins rubbing his arm and shoulder.)
"I want you to give it a try now, Shawn, so that you have some experience."
(Shawn walks over to the man, kicks him in the head and locks him in the armbar.)
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Nooooooooooooooooooo!"
"That's good, Shawn. Good technique and I liked that kick to the head. That was a nice touch."
"This is fun!"
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!"
