Post by Jack of Blades on Apr 26, 2006 14:16:19 GMT -5
Director's Note: Wooden Epidermis is over for now. Jack is back to his promo-making himself.
(A short one now, Jack of Blades is in a chair reading this week's TV Guide. He's not dressed as his 'Wooden Epidermis' self but has reverted back to his usual attire of a victorian suit underneath a ebony trenchcoat. His shoulder-long hair is shaped and styled as well, not slicked back.)
Jack of Blades: "Sunday, 20:00. The Simpsons. In a new episode, Mr. Burns opens up a casino and it is discovered that Marge has a gambling problem. Celebrities Starring This Week: David Schwimmer, Jennifer Aniston, Courtney Cox, Matt LeBlanc, Matthew Perry (Lisa Kudrow refused to appear), Prince Charles, The artist formerly known as Prince, Michael Jackson (again), Tom Cruise's baby, God.
Followed by Lost, 20:30. The survivors discover a dilipidated ice-cream truck and its contents haven't melted. Eerily enough, the number of cornetto's equally match the number of survivors."
(Jack takes a pen out of his pocket and highlights where he was reading.)
Sorry, I was just finding out what was on Television this coming Sunday. I'll obviously be out entertaining but I'm gonna suggest something radical. Havock, stay in, put your feet up, watch television, invite the team over, have a barbecue and make your world famous lemon chicken. But don't come to the arena. You're not needed. You're not important. That match will all be about Ellis and I locking arms. No one is paying to watch you. No one is paying to watch Chrissy's jugs jiggle. No one is paying to see the belt defended. Let's just read the blurb for Payback shall we:
"20:00. Wrestling Championship Federation presents Payback as Outcast tries to demonstrate himself as more than a 'paper champion.' Also on the card Torture attempts to get his final revenge on those that have slaughtered his family and Jack of Blades makes his Pay-Per-View debut facing off against the hideous Ellis. Capping this off are two rookie matches between NWA veteran Biggs and former gambler, Ace and the religious New Messiah versus the distraught Ripper."
Not a single mention of your name there, Havock, my friend. Now you may consider you and the rest of the Judas Jockies or the Sedition Squad or whatever you call yourselves to be the talk-of-the-town but TV Guide says otherwise. And TV Guide is always right, except for programme times but that's irrelevant.
And yes, I know with your one-dimensional mind, you consider Ellis to be nothing more than a lost scared girl and you view myself as nothing more than a pretentious bully tormenting a lost scared girl. But no, oh no, we're much more than that. We're the talk of the town. We're the innovators. We are the main event. And, we both fucking hate it.
So, Havock it would be best if you are absent at Payback. But if you do make an appearance, don't bring Chrissy. We already have a spare wheel in you.
(Jack continues to read the magazine and mutters something to the effect of 'Ooohhh, Stella gets her groove back at nine' as the camera fades out.)
(A short one now, Jack of Blades is in a chair reading this week's TV Guide. He's not dressed as his 'Wooden Epidermis' self but has reverted back to his usual attire of a victorian suit underneath a ebony trenchcoat. His shoulder-long hair is shaped and styled as well, not slicked back.)
Jack of Blades: "Sunday, 20:00. The Simpsons. In a new episode, Mr. Burns opens up a casino and it is discovered that Marge has a gambling problem. Celebrities Starring This Week: David Schwimmer, Jennifer Aniston, Courtney Cox, Matt LeBlanc, Matthew Perry (Lisa Kudrow refused to appear), Prince Charles, The artist formerly known as Prince, Michael Jackson (again), Tom Cruise's baby, God.
Followed by Lost, 20:30. The survivors discover a dilipidated ice-cream truck and its contents haven't melted. Eerily enough, the number of cornetto's equally match the number of survivors."
(Jack takes a pen out of his pocket and highlights where he was reading.)
Sorry, I was just finding out what was on Television this coming Sunday. I'll obviously be out entertaining but I'm gonna suggest something radical. Havock, stay in, put your feet up, watch television, invite the team over, have a barbecue and make your world famous lemon chicken. But don't come to the arena. You're not needed. You're not important. That match will all be about Ellis and I locking arms. No one is paying to watch you. No one is paying to watch Chrissy's jugs jiggle. No one is paying to see the belt defended. Let's just read the blurb for Payback shall we:
"20:00. Wrestling Championship Federation presents Payback as Outcast tries to demonstrate himself as more than a 'paper champion.' Also on the card Torture attempts to get his final revenge on those that have slaughtered his family and Jack of Blades makes his Pay-Per-View debut facing off against the hideous Ellis. Capping this off are two rookie matches between NWA veteran Biggs and former gambler, Ace and the religious New Messiah versus the distraught Ripper."
Not a single mention of your name there, Havock, my friend. Now you may consider you and the rest of the Judas Jockies or the Sedition Squad or whatever you call yourselves to be the talk-of-the-town but TV Guide says otherwise. And TV Guide is always right, except for programme times but that's irrelevant.
And yes, I know with your one-dimensional mind, you consider Ellis to be nothing more than a lost scared girl and you view myself as nothing more than a pretentious bully tormenting a lost scared girl. But no, oh no, we're much more than that. We're the talk of the town. We're the innovators. We are the main event. And, we both fucking hate it.
So, Havock it would be best if you are absent at Payback. But if you do make an appearance, don't bring Chrissy. We already have a spare wheel in you.
(Jack continues to read the magazine and mutters something to the effect of 'Ooohhh, Stella gets her groove back at nine' as the camera fades out.)
