Post by logan on Jul 11, 2006 17:22:00 GMT -5
The scene opens up, we find Logan browsing on his laptop in his locker room.
Logan: WGC.. WWE.. HIW... Ah! Here we go, WCF..
Logan opens up a website, where "WCF" appears.
Logan: Wait, since when did we get any nude women.. oh.. I see..
Logan sits back in his computer, looking confused.
Logan: Wet Cock Fun! Not the WCF I was looking for. Oh, here we go.
Logan finally makes it to the website, and looks over information for next weeks show.
Logan: Night of The Singles Matches? Huh, MY name, and Nate Nytro?!
Logan turns his head to the camera.
Logan: Do I look SINGLE to you? I mean, I can believe Nate Nytro being single.. but me? No way.
Logan continues to carry the dumb founded look on his face, before shutting down the computer. He doesn't quite understand that singles matches met one on one matches, sigh, what an idiot.
Logan: The most sexiest man in WCF, single? Haha! They wish. I'm actually seeing a cute little blondie, and she happens to be with us at this very moment.
The camera scans around the room, not seeing anyone.
Logan: Well, she's kind of shy.. her name is Linda. Come out Linda, there is nothing to be ashamed of.
Finally, we spot a blow up doll that Logan was talking to. She's sitting at the desk, with a blonde wig on, and "slut" written on her chest.
Logan: Whoa, whoa.. wait a second.
Logan runs in front of her real quick, grabbing a black magic marker, crossing out "slut", and writing "Linda" above that.
Logan: No idea where that came from.
A glare spreading over Logan's face, as he storms out of his locker room, and steps out into the hall way.
Logan: If I find out who's been writing graffiti on my girlfriend, your fired!
Logan goes back into his lockeroom, slamming the door.
Logan: No respect for people, it's horrible. I'm so sorry, Linda.
Logan leans over the blow up doll, kissing it on the cheek.
Logan: Wouldn't want to kiss you on the mouth would we?
Logan leans back, chuckling.
Logan: Well, if you would excuse me honey.. I have a promo to do.
Logan grabs her by the arms, sitting her up on the desk in front of him with her legs spread out as he takes a seat.
Logan: So.. where did I begin? Hm? Should I start this off in a positive light, or should I just go ahead, and begin with the boudle insults?
Logan rubs his chin.
Logan: Good ole Nate Nytro! Uh, how you been.. buddy? It's been years since we've wrestled hasn't it?
Logan sighs.
Logan: This just isn't working. So, this week it's good ole boudle Nytro huh? I honestly can't remember the last time we wrestled, actually, I don't even think I know who you are. I do know your part of The New Douches of Wrestling, and your really proud of it. So how does it feel Nate? Huh? Feel good being apart of a group like that? I bet it would, hanging out with Creeping Death, and the oh so mighty Tort! Ohhh, Tort. Get a f'n grip. Torture, and Creeping Death. Need I really say more? Do I even have to even bother changing their names up to make fun of them? Nope. It looks as if that's self explanatory. So, I guess you could say they've already done me a favor. It's sad to see "Torture" plated on the world title belt, it makes you wonder if there is any bondage going on in WCF. I really don't know where this is going, but Nate, just look at yourself for a few seconds. You see anything? Let me give you a little help with that, because you see, I see three things wrong with you Nytro. Your pathetic. No future in wrestling. A washed up boudle that never got the chance to even become a has been. There, that's what I see. Nate, you've never got the chance to.. retire, or go out with a bang. You've never shot out at WCF with a bang, you seem to fade away whenever your name gets thrown around. I mean really dude, do you understand what I'm trying to tell you? Your a nobody. You've never been anything, and you'll never be remembered for squat. You don't even deserve to be in the ring with me, boudle. I mean look at me Nate, just f'n look at this. The Face of Treachery, the only WCF superstar that's STILL here from the very beginning, four time world champion, two time war winner.. legend. Hell do you even understand how hard it is to win a War? I mean really, have you ever put fourth that much effort in your wrestling career? To win a War, you've got to survive through every WCF superstar that's active. I've beaten any big name that ever had anything to do with this place. But no Nate, I'm not bragging to you.. I'm just letting you know that I'm the opposite of you, I'm going to be remeberd.. your not. You've got nothing on me Nytro. But hey, there is such a thing as fairy tales, and miracles can happen. So let's just say that somehow out of a freak occurrence, a miracle, or a little kids wish to finally see Nate shine, and beat the best superstar that WCF ever had.. let's just say that does actually happen, and you do beat me. Well, damn Nate then you might have something for yourself there.. you would've just beat the man TO beat, and your career would be uphill from there. You see what I'm saying? Beating me would make you remembered, just for beating ME. But what would happen to me? Ah, not too much. It's true, legends never die. It'd go down in the history books, your right about that, but there would always be talk.. "Oh, Logan was past his prime during the match.", "Nate got lucky." Do you know why people would talk about the match that way? Because when you compare me, to you, it's just not the same. Our wrestling careers have nothing incommon, and quite frankly your just not in my league. Did I just bust that little star you had in your eyes when you heard the news you were facing Logan? Ah, I'm sorry to put you down like this.. especially before you lose to me, but hey.. the truth hurts, deal with it. People will learn to understand losing, the more they face me.
Logan smacks his hands together, as if he was dusting dirt off.
Logan: Well, that's a wrap for Nate Crapo.
Logan sighs.
Logan: The New Dynasty of Wrestling, HA! Torture. World Champion. Creeping Death. Hardcore Champion. Nate Nytro. Boudle.
Logan falls back in his seat laughing.
Logan: Oh, good one.. you like that Linda? Oh, still mad about what happened today? I bet you are. I can't believe they treated you that way. Well, fans, and boudles.. you probably have no idea what I'm talking about right now, but I do have some footage of me, and Linda going to the movies today. You wouldn't believe the way they treated her. Well, I'll just let everyone take a look..
-Earlier Today-
The scene reopens to previously recorded footage, so any edits, or voice overs may occur during the viewing of this. I'm one of them type of guys who like to roll the credits at the beginning of the film, so.. here you have it.
Credits:
Extras Boudles
Woman #2 Boudle
Logan Logan
Blowup Doll Linda
Logan Slipping On Spilt Soda (StuntMan) Joe Brown
Director Seth Lerch
The scene opens up, we find Logan standing inside the snack room, with Linda next to him, her arm over his shoulder.
Logan: So baby, extra butter on the popcorn? Or no..?
We got a shot of the blowup doll, or as Logan would call it.. Linda. The doll is worn out looking, "slut" written on the chest, smeared lipstick on the lips, and looks ready to blow at any second. Logan notices a small leak between her legs, air is slowly hissing out of the doll. The lady behind the snack bar stares at Logan as he wraps duck tape between her legs, the leak stops. Logan notices he's been stared at.
Logan: Hey, it's that time of month..
Logan gets closer to the woman behind the snack bar, and lowers his voice to a whisper.
Logan: She's on her period. Shhh.
Woman: Right.
Logan: So honey bun, what size should I get? The King Size butterfingers, or the regular?
Logan turns his attention back to the snack bar lady.
Logan: There's nothing she can fit in her mouth, I think we'll go with kingsize.
Logan lets off a little wink, before paying for the candy bar.
Logan: Off we go.
Logan drags the blowup doll down the hall, going to the theater. Logan turns to Linda, whispering in it's ear.
Logan: You ever done it in a public place?
Logan makes the doll shake it's head. You hear Seth Lerch yelling "CUT!" in the background, something they forgot to edit out during the making of this promo. The scene fast forwards to Logan, and the doll going inside the theater. Logan has a glow to him, and looks spent. The doll on the other hand, as more lipstick smeared on her lips. Logan, and Linda find a seat as Logan turns his attention to the camera.
Logan: Well, here we are WCF.. me, and MY GIRLFRIEND at the movies. Me single? Right. I'm a f'n hound dog. Oh, sorry Linda.. you know your the only one.
Logan winks at the camera.
Logan: Yeah, right. Anyhow, like I was saying.. why they actually posted that crap on the WCF site, I'll never know. Who made that stupid webpage anyway?
............
Logan turns to Linda.
Logan: You were great last night, maybe we could make tonight another magical one. Well, I have a few minutes before the movie starts.. so I'll just get right down to the point. The New Douches of Wrestling are trying to make an impact, or wait.. maybe they already did? But to me, you know who stands out the most? The number one douche of them all, Nate Nytro. You see what I'm doing right now Nate, I'm hanging out with my old lady, and we're enjoying some company time. You bet you had this didn't you? You never will. Your just not as successful as me, women like this just have not interest in boudles, or anyone that would associate themselves with The Douches of Wrestling. The biggest group of boudles to ever grace WCF, and shoot the man whoever thought of the name! Because really, come on.. Dynasty? I can understand someone having three titles, winning a title three times, or a group of three champions. But two champions, and a boudle..? THAT'S DYNASTY?! Give me a f'n break. What's so good about that? Is Nate a little bit behind, getting carried perhaps? Hear that Nate? SHUT UP! This f'n promo wouldn't finish without hearing one of them. But really Nate, how is that working out for you? Your in the shadow of Torture, and Creeping Death. You know you can't stand it, I'm sure it eats you up every time they parade around the ring with their titles, and your stuck there behind the flashing lights. Talk to me, admit that your jealous. I know you despise them, you have to. But the real question is, when will you pick up a title belt, and make your team a true dynasty? Can't go for hardcore, I don't know who would really want to in the first place, and I'm sure you couldn't win the T.V. title if you tired. So, Nate.. your screwed. You will continue to be shadowed in your team, and you will continue to let down your teammates. The New Dynasty of Wrestling? What a joke. I got a movie to watch with my girlfriend Nate, your wasting my time.
Logan cuts a hole in the bottom of the popcorn box, as we seen Linda's hand reaching inside as the scene fades out.
Logan: WGC.. WWE.. HIW... Ah! Here we go, WCF..
Logan opens up a website, where "WCF" appears.
Logan: Wait, since when did we get any nude women.. oh.. I see..
Logan sits back in his computer, looking confused.
Logan: Wet Cock Fun! Not the WCF I was looking for. Oh, here we go.
Logan finally makes it to the website, and looks over information for next weeks show.
Logan: Night of The Singles Matches? Huh, MY name, and Nate Nytro?!
Logan turns his head to the camera.
Logan: Do I look SINGLE to you? I mean, I can believe Nate Nytro being single.. but me? No way.
Logan continues to carry the dumb founded look on his face, before shutting down the computer. He doesn't quite understand that singles matches met one on one matches, sigh, what an idiot.
Logan: The most sexiest man in WCF, single? Haha! They wish. I'm actually seeing a cute little blondie, and she happens to be with us at this very moment.
The camera scans around the room, not seeing anyone.
Logan: Well, she's kind of shy.. her name is Linda. Come out Linda, there is nothing to be ashamed of.
Finally, we spot a blow up doll that Logan was talking to. She's sitting at the desk, with a blonde wig on, and "slut" written on her chest.
Logan: Whoa, whoa.. wait a second.
Logan runs in front of her real quick, grabbing a black magic marker, crossing out "slut", and writing "Linda" above that.
Logan: No idea where that came from.
A glare spreading over Logan's face, as he storms out of his locker room, and steps out into the hall way.
Logan: If I find out who's been writing graffiti on my girlfriend, your fired!
Logan goes back into his lockeroom, slamming the door.
Logan: No respect for people, it's horrible. I'm so sorry, Linda.
Logan leans over the blow up doll, kissing it on the cheek.
Logan: Wouldn't want to kiss you on the mouth would we?
Logan leans back, chuckling.
Logan: Well, if you would excuse me honey.. I have a promo to do.
Logan grabs her by the arms, sitting her up on the desk in front of him with her legs spread out as he takes a seat.
Logan: So.. where did I begin? Hm? Should I start this off in a positive light, or should I just go ahead, and begin with the boudle insults?
Logan rubs his chin.
Logan: Good ole Nate Nytro! Uh, how you been.. buddy? It's been years since we've wrestled hasn't it?
Logan sighs.
Logan: This just isn't working. So, this week it's good ole boudle Nytro huh? I honestly can't remember the last time we wrestled, actually, I don't even think I know who you are. I do know your part of The New Douches of Wrestling, and your really proud of it. So how does it feel Nate? Huh? Feel good being apart of a group like that? I bet it would, hanging out with Creeping Death, and the oh so mighty Tort! Ohhh, Tort. Get a f'n grip. Torture, and Creeping Death. Need I really say more? Do I even have to even bother changing their names up to make fun of them? Nope. It looks as if that's self explanatory. So, I guess you could say they've already done me a favor. It's sad to see "Torture" plated on the world title belt, it makes you wonder if there is any bondage going on in WCF. I really don't know where this is going, but Nate, just look at yourself for a few seconds. You see anything? Let me give you a little help with that, because you see, I see three things wrong with you Nytro. Your pathetic. No future in wrestling. A washed up boudle that never got the chance to even become a has been. There, that's what I see. Nate, you've never got the chance to.. retire, or go out with a bang. You've never shot out at WCF with a bang, you seem to fade away whenever your name gets thrown around. I mean really dude, do you understand what I'm trying to tell you? Your a nobody. You've never been anything, and you'll never be remembered for squat. You don't even deserve to be in the ring with me, boudle. I mean look at me Nate, just f'n look at this. The Face of Treachery, the only WCF superstar that's STILL here from the very beginning, four time world champion, two time war winner.. legend. Hell do you even understand how hard it is to win a War? I mean really, have you ever put fourth that much effort in your wrestling career? To win a War, you've got to survive through every WCF superstar that's active. I've beaten any big name that ever had anything to do with this place. But no Nate, I'm not bragging to you.. I'm just letting you know that I'm the opposite of you, I'm going to be remeberd.. your not. You've got nothing on me Nytro. But hey, there is such a thing as fairy tales, and miracles can happen. So let's just say that somehow out of a freak occurrence, a miracle, or a little kids wish to finally see Nate shine, and beat the best superstar that WCF ever had.. let's just say that does actually happen, and you do beat me. Well, damn Nate then you might have something for yourself there.. you would've just beat the man TO beat, and your career would be uphill from there. You see what I'm saying? Beating me would make you remembered, just for beating ME. But what would happen to me? Ah, not too much. It's true, legends never die. It'd go down in the history books, your right about that, but there would always be talk.. "Oh, Logan was past his prime during the match.", "Nate got lucky." Do you know why people would talk about the match that way? Because when you compare me, to you, it's just not the same. Our wrestling careers have nothing incommon, and quite frankly your just not in my league. Did I just bust that little star you had in your eyes when you heard the news you were facing Logan? Ah, I'm sorry to put you down like this.. especially before you lose to me, but hey.. the truth hurts, deal with it. People will learn to understand losing, the more they face me.
Logan smacks his hands together, as if he was dusting dirt off.
Logan: Well, that's a wrap for Nate Crapo.
Logan sighs.
Logan: The New Dynasty of Wrestling, HA! Torture. World Champion. Creeping Death. Hardcore Champion. Nate Nytro. Boudle.
Logan falls back in his seat laughing.
Logan: Oh, good one.. you like that Linda? Oh, still mad about what happened today? I bet you are. I can't believe they treated you that way. Well, fans, and boudles.. you probably have no idea what I'm talking about right now, but I do have some footage of me, and Linda going to the movies today. You wouldn't believe the way they treated her. Well, I'll just let everyone take a look..
-Earlier Today-
The scene reopens to previously recorded footage, so any edits, or voice overs may occur during the viewing of this. I'm one of them type of guys who like to roll the credits at the beginning of the film, so.. here you have it.
Credits:
Extras Boudles
Woman #2 Boudle
Logan Logan
Blowup Doll Linda
Logan Slipping On Spilt Soda (StuntMan) Joe Brown
Director Seth Lerch
The scene opens up, we find Logan standing inside the snack room, with Linda next to him, her arm over his shoulder.
Logan: So baby, extra butter on the popcorn? Or no..?
We got a shot of the blowup doll, or as Logan would call it.. Linda. The doll is worn out looking, "slut" written on the chest, smeared lipstick on the lips, and looks ready to blow at any second. Logan notices a small leak between her legs, air is slowly hissing out of the doll. The lady behind the snack bar stares at Logan as he wraps duck tape between her legs, the leak stops. Logan notices he's been stared at.
Logan: Hey, it's that time of month..
Logan gets closer to the woman behind the snack bar, and lowers his voice to a whisper.
Logan: She's on her period. Shhh.
Woman: Right.
Logan: So honey bun, what size should I get? The King Size butterfingers, or the regular?
Logan turns his attention back to the snack bar lady.
Logan: There's nothing she can fit in her mouth, I think we'll go with kingsize.
Logan lets off a little wink, before paying for the candy bar.
Logan: Off we go.
Logan drags the blowup doll down the hall, going to the theater. Logan turns to Linda, whispering in it's ear.
Logan: You ever done it in a public place?
Logan makes the doll shake it's head. You hear Seth Lerch yelling "CUT!" in the background, something they forgot to edit out during the making of this promo. The scene fast forwards to Logan, and the doll going inside the theater. Logan has a glow to him, and looks spent. The doll on the other hand, as more lipstick smeared on her lips. Logan, and Linda find a seat as Logan turns his attention to the camera.
Logan: Well, here we are WCF.. me, and MY GIRLFRIEND at the movies. Me single? Right. I'm a f'n hound dog. Oh, sorry Linda.. you know your the only one.
Logan winks at the camera.
Logan: Yeah, right. Anyhow, like I was saying.. why they actually posted that crap on the WCF site, I'll never know. Who made that stupid webpage anyway?
............
Logan turns to Linda.
Logan: You were great last night, maybe we could make tonight another magical one. Well, I have a few minutes before the movie starts.. so I'll just get right down to the point. The New Douches of Wrestling are trying to make an impact, or wait.. maybe they already did? But to me, you know who stands out the most? The number one douche of them all, Nate Nytro. You see what I'm doing right now Nate, I'm hanging out with my old lady, and we're enjoying some company time. You bet you had this didn't you? You never will. Your just not as successful as me, women like this just have not interest in boudles, or anyone that would associate themselves with The Douches of Wrestling. The biggest group of boudles to ever grace WCF, and shoot the man whoever thought of the name! Because really, come on.. Dynasty? I can understand someone having three titles, winning a title three times, or a group of three champions. But two champions, and a boudle..? THAT'S DYNASTY?! Give me a f'n break. What's so good about that? Is Nate a little bit behind, getting carried perhaps? Hear that Nate? SHUT UP! This f'n promo wouldn't finish without hearing one of them. But really Nate, how is that working out for you? Your in the shadow of Torture, and Creeping Death. You know you can't stand it, I'm sure it eats you up every time they parade around the ring with their titles, and your stuck there behind the flashing lights. Talk to me, admit that your jealous. I know you despise them, you have to. But the real question is, when will you pick up a title belt, and make your team a true dynasty? Can't go for hardcore, I don't know who would really want to in the first place, and I'm sure you couldn't win the T.V. title if you tired. So, Nate.. your screwed. You will continue to be shadowed in your team, and you will continue to let down your teammates. The New Dynasty of Wrestling? What a joke. I got a movie to watch with my girlfriend Nate, your wasting my time.
Logan cuts a hole in the bottom of the popcorn box, as we seen Linda's hand reaching inside as the scene fades out.
