Post by wblstudios on Mar 31, 2006 17:29:22 GMT -5
*Cherry Blossom Pink? What were they thinking? Eh. The scene opens in a place that's probably gonna seem pretty familiar the more we hear from this babe. A bar. And not one of those run down drunk tank dives either. One of those classy places. Where all the shit is made of marble. The camera scans across the bar with people in suit and tie chugging 'em down, and eventually the last few guys are looking offscreen in the direction of the pan... that's because a tall, blond, long-legged, athletic looking, and incredibly busty woman is sitting on the bar itself, a cup of hot sake (Rice wine for the uninitiated) in one hand, and a kendo stick in the other. Not the kind to force herself to get all fancied up just to get drunk, even in a place where most of the shit is made of marble, this woman's clad simply in a tight bikini top and a pair of comfortable jeans. From the look on her face and the various different bottles around her, it's obvious she 'started the party' already. Her voice is deep, and rather raspy, with a very thick Osakan accent*
Josephine: Greetings and salutations, motherfuckers. Let me tell you... you are some lucky sons of bitches. Let me tell you. Of all the rundown feds in all this country, I chose this place to launch my American invasion. And if you ain't heard of me, then you seriously need to get off your ass, turn off that bullshit they call American Wrestling, and get a dose full of something that won't totally fucking suck. And here's your shot right now... the International Superbitch, the greatest female wrestler this side of the sushi bar, Josephine Miyazaki. But y'all can call me Jojo.
Josephine: Now I know what you're thinking. Who's this bitch to tell us who we are, and what we're thinking? Well, I'm just being straight-up honest. I'm not the kind of person who'll bullshit. Take it or leave it, and I notice a lot of people here can't take it.
*Chugs the sake, and grabs another bottle from offscreen* And I would've been the first woman wrestler this fed had ever seen if I hadn't gotten pissed one night in my hotel room and puked all over my contract. But hey. I had reason to celebrate.
Josephine: Ya see, I've been around the world. In Mexico, I ripped off mask after mask and caught little flying freaks midair with kendo shots. In Austrailia, I went toe to toe with some of the biggest men and biggest drinkers around. In my native Japan, I drank a LOT of fucking sake and caned the hell out of some of the names I grew up watching. And now I'm here, with ONE mission only... TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR FAVORITE WRESTLER! And with the help of my pal, child prodigy and 16 year old college graduate Kikyo Daioh...
*A young girl's head peeks out over the top of the bar behind Jojo*
Kikyo: Konichiwaaaaaaa!
*The head goes back down behind the bar*
Josephine: ... I'm gonna show you what real women can do when cornered in the ring. And ya know, while we're on the subject... *chugs the bottle of sake and reaches for another one offscreen, unable to find one... Kikyo's hand peeks above the bar, placing another bottle on there, then disappears as Jojo grabs it* ... I recently took it upon myself to see what America thinks of it's women wrestlers. In Japan, you have to have skill, you need power and agility, and heart most of all, to make it in women's wrestling and win the hearts of the audience. Apparently in America, to qualify as a female "World Wrestler", you only need two things... *leans back and shakes her large chest slightly* and I'm MORE than ahead of the game in that. So you assholes better watch out, because Jojo's here to beat the shit out of your favorite wrestler, and I'm starting next week, when I beat the shit out of... of... fuck. Can't remember.
Kikyo: *hiding behind the bar* Rage and Rick Mad.
Josephine: *chugs her bottle of sake and tosses it offscreen with a shatter* Two on one? Fuck kind of hospitality is this to put me against two people? You're lucky that I got the skills to make some kills. Just remember assholes... life's a bitch... then you step in the ring with one. Let's go, Kikyo, this place is startin' to get to me. Where's my fucking car keys?
Kikyo: *peeks her head above the bar again* I left them at the hotel, Jojo-sempai. Can't have you driving like this. Kikyo-chan's already called a cab for Jojo-sempai.
Josephine: Great, ain't she? Always looking out for me... *reaches into her jeans and pulls out a paper fan with the Japan flag on it with her free hand, never having let go of her kendo stick, and whacks Kikyo on the head with the fan... just a paper fan, totally harmless* BUT DON'T FUCK WITH MY KEYS!
Kikyo: Gomen Nasai!
*Josephine finally hops off the bar amid the empty bottles of sake, stalking offscreen. Kikyo stands up, showing she's pretty damn short and wearing a Japanese schoolgirl's uniform, and grabs the marble bowl of peanuts sitting on the bar before following her offscreen. Fade out.*
Josephine: Greetings and salutations, motherfuckers. Let me tell you... you are some lucky sons of bitches. Let me tell you. Of all the rundown feds in all this country, I chose this place to launch my American invasion. And if you ain't heard of me, then you seriously need to get off your ass, turn off that bullshit they call American Wrestling, and get a dose full of something that won't totally fucking suck. And here's your shot right now... the International Superbitch, the greatest female wrestler this side of the sushi bar, Josephine Miyazaki. But y'all can call me Jojo.
Josephine: Now I know what you're thinking. Who's this bitch to tell us who we are, and what we're thinking? Well, I'm just being straight-up honest. I'm not the kind of person who'll bullshit. Take it or leave it, and I notice a lot of people here can't take it.
*Chugs the sake, and grabs another bottle from offscreen* And I would've been the first woman wrestler this fed had ever seen if I hadn't gotten pissed one night in my hotel room and puked all over my contract. But hey. I had reason to celebrate.
Josephine: Ya see, I've been around the world. In Mexico, I ripped off mask after mask and caught little flying freaks midair with kendo shots. In Austrailia, I went toe to toe with some of the biggest men and biggest drinkers around. In my native Japan, I drank a LOT of fucking sake and caned the hell out of some of the names I grew up watching. And now I'm here, with ONE mission only... TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR FAVORITE WRESTLER! And with the help of my pal, child prodigy and 16 year old college graduate Kikyo Daioh...
*A young girl's head peeks out over the top of the bar behind Jojo*
Kikyo: Konichiwaaaaaaa!
*The head goes back down behind the bar*
Josephine: ... I'm gonna show you what real women can do when cornered in the ring. And ya know, while we're on the subject... *chugs the bottle of sake and reaches for another one offscreen, unable to find one... Kikyo's hand peeks above the bar, placing another bottle on there, then disappears as Jojo grabs it* ... I recently took it upon myself to see what America thinks of it's women wrestlers. In Japan, you have to have skill, you need power and agility, and heart most of all, to make it in women's wrestling and win the hearts of the audience. Apparently in America, to qualify as a female "World Wrestler", you only need two things... *leans back and shakes her large chest slightly* and I'm MORE than ahead of the game in that. So you assholes better watch out, because Jojo's here to beat the shit out of your favorite wrestler, and I'm starting next week, when I beat the shit out of... of... fuck. Can't remember.
Kikyo: *hiding behind the bar* Rage and Rick Mad.
Josephine: *chugs her bottle of sake and tosses it offscreen with a shatter* Two on one? Fuck kind of hospitality is this to put me against two people? You're lucky that I got the skills to make some kills. Just remember assholes... life's a bitch... then you step in the ring with one. Let's go, Kikyo, this place is startin' to get to me. Where's my fucking car keys?
Kikyo: *peeks her head above the bar again* I left them at the hotel, Jojo-sempai. Can't have you driving like this. Kikyo-chan's already called a cab for Jojo-sempai.
Josephine: Great, ain't she? Always looking out for me... *reaches into her jeans and pulls out a paper fan with the Japan flag on it with her free hand, never having let go of her kendo stick, and whacks Kikyo on the head with the fan... just a paper fan, totally harmless* BUT DON'T FUCK WITH MY KEYS!
Kikyo: Gomen Nasai!
*Josephine finally hops off the bar amid the empty bottles of sake, stalking offscreen. Kikyo stands up, showing she's pretty damn short and wearing a Japanese schoolgirl's uniform, and grabs the marble bowl of peanuts sitting on the bar before following her offscreen. Fade out.*
