Post by James Wolf on Jan 27, 2019 11:10:57 GMT -5
A brief history of Undertakers
By: Richard Rawlinson
We then get the following voice over from Richard Rawlinson, as it will describe the theme of this week. This week the symbolism needs to be driven hard into the memory banks of everybody on the roster, and especially into the thick skull of one Jay Omega. But first things first let's hear this brief history, and then we will take care of business regarding slam, and future plans of the WCF Hardcore Title.
“In medieval times, the word ‘undertaker’ was used vaguely for anyone undertaking a task, whether house building or funeral work. It doesn’t derive from taking the deceased six feet under but, by the 17th century, the term ‘funeral undertaker’ was being abbreviated to ‘undertaker’ and, as this association became widespread, folk in other trades stopped calling themselves ‘undertakers’. Death by association.”
“I’m not sure when undertakers started referring to themselves as funeral directors, but my hunch is it was in the early-20th century, or perhaps the 19th century? The title reflects the public, ceremonial role played on the big day itself, conjuring up an image of somber-suited bearers and polished hearses. It perhaps glosses over the preparation done before arriving at this stage: the embalming or ‘hygiene treatment’; the safekeeping in the Chapel of Rest or cold storage in the ‘hub’.”
“Then again, you expect a director to be an efficient administrator, entrusted with booking venues and celebrants, and answering individual needs. You also expect to talk business with a director, to buy their products and services. This is in stark contrast to the word ‘mortician’, someone you envisage wearing rubber gloves and performing rather unpleasant acts in a back room. Ironically, the American trade coined the word, ‘mortician’, believing it sounded less gloomy than ‘funeral director’—surely only to those who didn’t know the Latin root of ‘mort’? They also thought it had a professional ring. Exactly, it sounds rather too much like ‘physician’ “
“Early undertakers tended to work as builders, joiners and carpenters, skills that translated to coffin-making at times of death in the village. This was often the case even in the early 20th century. The family would inform their doctor first to certify a death, and then the local ‘layer out’—usually a woman—would help carry out the ‘last offices’, attending to the needs of both bereaved and deceased. They would call on the parish priest to perform the Last Rites, and summon the undertaker to take measurements for a bespoke coffin, made in haste from sanded and polished hardwood, and sealed inside with wax and bitumen to avoid leakage.”
“The undertaker would return to the house to deliver the coffin, sometimes having to remove a window as the door was too narrow. The deceased, clothed in their best nightdress or Sunday suit, would then rest in the front parlour until the funeral, usually held three or four days after death. Sweet smelling flowers were placed around the room to absorb bad odours and the undertaker would visit to check on any unpleasantness. Embalming was only performed for wealthy clients, and it wasn’t until the 1950s that Chapels of Rest became established in funeral homes.”
“The typical cost of a funeral in the mid-1940s was about £20, which included the making of the coffin, providing four bearers, hearse and car, church fees and grave digger. The fee of half a crown was paid to the person who performed the ‘laying out’. With the average wage being only £2.75 per week, the cost of funerals today is comparable.”
The voice over fades out as we now wonder how this will be explained but its pretty clear what this means for Jeremiah Locke. A man who is essentially missing in action, but when he finally does show up at Monday Slam Jeremiah may again find himself in some very humble beginnings.It was time to get down to business as WCF ALL ACCESS appears across your television screen followed by that very familiar theme of Madhouse by Anthrax.
When we catch up with James Wolf he is of course studying up on all things strange. One of them being a man who made his home completely out of caskets. How some people use casket's as an actual bed in their daily lives and the list goes on but if it did well there wouldn't be a James Wolf promo to follow, and while that may make a lot of people happy James was always happy to spoil their day! The important man of the hour who hasn't been seen yet. James was hoping that would change but now it looks like he'll be putting another nobody out of their fucking misery! One thing he absolutely loves to do! Before he does mention one Jeremiah Locke he wants to make sure he at least his brief history covered. Even if the man is too scared to walk to the ring and face his own competition.
Walking around all of these weird things could be creepy. Others might think it was cool but James thought it was just strange but it was this deep study that would help put away his competition at Monday Night Slam!
Thoughts raced at speed comparable to light speed if you will inside of his mind. He had heard rumblings in the backstage area about this “Gentleman” Jeremiah Locke. How he was suppose to be the next “Break Out Star” the WCF had signed but all James could see was that the man was going to be known not as the next “Gentleman” with animalistic tendencies but a fucking lowly jobber that never was. Not because the WCF didn't take its chances on the man but because the man himself was too scared to really pull the trigger to show case just what he had to offer here himself.
Needing a break from all things strange and weird James takes a walk outside. In one hand is a cup with a lid and a straw. It's just Dr. Pepper. Stores close to Museums usually don't sell whiskey.... with that James is also ready to speak on this man who calls himself “The Gentleman” Jeremiah Locke.
Here we are, mere moments from Slam, and I'm gearing up for what will likely be another easy week. But before I prove myself right let's do the work just in case the man actually decides to stop being fat and lazy this week. Surprises tend to happen around me, and I hate surprises because you never know what to expect!
Now, I rocked you with the brief symbolism of Undertakers before speaking with you tonight! There is a reason for that and that is because I, take a huge “under taking” with the WCF every week with little to no reward, and I'm not complaining about it. I just do my job like you're suppose too while the WCF over looks me on opportunity after opportunity. There was a death by association reputation. People stopped calling themselves “undertakers” , and well you can read the rest. The reason for the added symbolism however was I was telling Mr. Jeremiah Locke know that this is the final nail in his career!
Back in the era of the Victorian West; where all of our cowboy legends were made people of that era used railroad ties to nail the coffins down. While a lot of people will say it was because of some silly superstition, the real reason is likely that materials were scarce, and they used what they had. This also prevented in leakage from the casket itself. You may be telling yourself that's a little morbid for me to explain. You are absolutely correct! But, I need you to understand, and take this stance on all failing careers. Especially regarding my opponent Jeremiah Locke. While he is off enjoying a vacation he dreamed up for himself I, on the other hand, will be taking him to task on just why he hasn't done anything for the WCF. And hey if the WCF wants to send nobodies my way to cut some dead weight I understand. We all have to do somebody else's dirty work every now and then but I'm not just going to make my name off of nobodies. I specifically want a championship here in the WCF. I'm growing impatient, and the more I look around here, the more the desire I previously felt for this business is boiling over.
That's bad for you Jeremiah beause it means I'm going to make short work of you, and then I'm going to get a closer view of Jay Omega, and Kennedy Matthews in that little tag match. What are my intentions? Well I guess we're just going to have to see when I get there. You know Jeremiah, its okay to be a gentleman. But when you're so much of a gentleman that you don't have any work ethic then that's a problem. A big problem, and then the WCF books you against somebody who is going to take out the garbage. The truth is that it really could have been anybody, but it ultimately ended up being me! While you're coming down that aisle all ready being so nervous that you've chewed your finger nails to the nubs I want you to remember something. I'm going to enjoy this! I'm going to enjoy putting you out of your misery so that next sack of shit that follows me doesn't have to bother with it!
James all of a sudden thinks of the landscape that is changing in the Hardcore Division, and suddenly he knows how he can get under both Kennedy Matthews, and Jay Omega's skin! But he never goes off topic and again he speaks about his current opponent.
Jeremiah when people look back on your legacy what will they actually say? My legacy is all ready cemented, and people here in the WCF, they hate that. It burns them alive inside! They all do the same thing any way. The blame individual X for getting heavy on the nostalgia, and then they turn right back around and when they do it, and in the context of how they do it then its suppose to be better than the other person. Do you know why that is Jeremiah? That's because wrestling runs on nostalgia. You can't possibly understand the future if you don't at least to some extent rely on the past. Everybodies career matters too. The things you've previously done aren't worthless. If they were you wouldn't still have a job. Yet, here I am taking another under taking for the WCF. Taking out their trash for them, and guess what? Next week it will be somebody else! Because that's how it works! I don't have the time or the patience to deal with your bull shit! You're making my life easier! Making it easier for my daughter to receive therapy when you don't show up, but you also don't give me any way for me to challenge myself and that's what pisses me off the most! But, you don't care. My words are idle and they're going in one ear, and out the other. However if you want to see what it's like to be animalistic I'll show you when I competely destroy you in that ring. You'll have done the smart thing. What's necessary! Quit before you've actually begun. Because you don't have the talent, or that special it factor it takes to stand toe to toe against me! You know it, I know it, and the WCF roster knew it as soon as this match was booked. Adios motherfucker, and good goddamn riddance! If there is a jobber purgatory for wrestlers I hope you end up there where you're stuck on losing. The button is stuck on repeat and you have no choice but to lose over and over again. That would be the perfect eternity for you Jeremiah. After I retire you at Monday Night Slam you can begin your descent in doubting yourself until you are ultimately forgotten about, and never heard from again! So Jeremiah, I'll see you at Monday Night Slam! I'll be getting my pay check early but I still have a little business to take care of while I'm there. So if you'll excuse me there is a little matter I need to address!
James did indeed hear Jay Omega's claim regarding the Hardcore Title, and it was now time for him to address it. Regardless of whether or not the WCF actually paid attention to it maybe just maybe they were going to take notice.
Jay Omega, correct me if I'm wrong but you don't know when the WCF is going to give you your shot at the WCF Hardcore Title correct? And just because you'll get a shot doesn't mean you'll win! I can make sure you don't! So I would advise you to keep your big mouth shut! Also you weren't here to see me beat your little go to boy friend Adam Young twice, and I also beat his stable members he sent after me! You see the difference between you and I? You like to talk out of your ass about shit you obviously have no clue about! While I did what nobody else had the balls to do! I actually challenged the champion to a match for the Hardcore title, but you see, there is an obvious disconnect going on around here on just what the Hardcore Title is, and what it stands for! It's not your title yet! I'm officially inserting myself back into my business, and you're going to be another casualty. I have a challenge for you now that I think of it! I know you were given an opportunity all ready for Kennedy Matthews Hardcore Title but what about if I beat you in a match I'm added into that Hardcore Title match and we make it a triple threat! This division was never going to be shaken up until I made my intentions absolutely clear! Do you need Kennedy's permission or do you accept?
Jay, I can see you have really low intelligence but it would be nice if you actually made some sense when you came out here to address me. I mean honestly, do you think I'm stupid, and I can't adjust what my original plan was? Kennedy Matthews wasn't brave enough to lose the belt to me so she thought she was taking a short cut in facing you but all roads lead back to me eventually, and I really don't give a shit who the place holder is. Whether its you, or Kennedy but we both know by now this place needs a change, and this WCF Hardcore Title needs a make over!
So just for a moment from a man whose held every incarnation of a “Hardcore” Title let's go over what it is. It's a staple to prove you are the best of the best. No excuses. All that you rely on is your blood, sweat, and tears, and your skill to get you by. That's all you have to rely on any way.
What it isn't?
It isn't a title that has non title clauses to it! In fact its usually a defend it or lose it title! It can be lost at any given moment so to keep this belt, and even to defend it makes it special. But the WCF has bastardized it! I'm ashamed to have to compete for a belt that is essentially a carbon copy of the TV Title! I mean this is a special attraction title! So what makes it special? Absolutely goddamn nothing! This isn't a competition problem! It's a WCF problem. I'm here to fix that Jay. I want the Hardcore Title to be as it should. So nobody can hide behind a non title match. Competition at is purest should mean everybody has a chance to be hardcore champion because in theory this special attraction belt is suppose to be the hardest to keep because you will do whatever it takes to keep it.
I'm not seeing that! So you can take your little trinket talk and shove it up your ass because clearly you don't have the IQ to understand what it takes to have a Hardcore Title, or keep one for that matter, and the WCF has no idea what it means to offer one! It fucking sickens me! So beside the challenge I made if you have any more question that are relevant you can ask. Other wise just shut the fuck up, and don't speak in matters you obviously have no knowledge in!
James then immediately goes over to a trash can and throws his empty cup into the receptacle. From there he notices a carnival in the distance. As he walks toward it we immediately fade to black. WCF ALL ACCESS COPYRIGHT 2019 is seen and then fades out
By: Richard Rawlinson
We then get the following voice over from Richard Rawlinson, as it will describe the theme of this week. This week the symbolism needs to be driven hard into the memory banks of everybody on the roster, and especially into the thick skull of one Jay Omega. But first things first let's hear this brief history, and then we will take care of business regarding slam, and future plans of the WCF Hardcore Title.
“In medieval times, the word ‘undertaker’ was used vaguely for anyone undertaking a task, whether house building or funeral work. It doesn’t derive from taking the deceased six feet under but, by the 17th century, the term ‘funeral undertaker’ was being abbreviated to ‘undertaker’ and, as this association became widespread, folk in other trades stopped calling themselves ‘undertakers’. Death by association.”
“I’m not sure when undertakers started referring to themselves as funeral directors, but my hunch is it was in the early-20th century, or perhaps the 19th century? The title reflects the public, ceremonial role played on the big day itself, conjuring up an image of somber-suited bearers and polished hearses. It perhaps glosses over the preparation done before arriving at this stage: the embalming or ‘hygiene treatment’; the safekeeping in the Chapel of Rest or cold storage in the ‘hub’.”
“Then again, you expect a director to be an efficient administrator, entrusted with booking venues and celebrants, and answering individual needs. You also expect to talk business with a director, to buy their products and services. This is in stark contrast to the word ‘mortician’, someone you envisage wearing rubber gloves and performing rather unpleasant acts in a back room. Ironically, the American trade coined the word, ‘mortician’, believing it sounded less gloomy than ‘funeral director’—surely only to those who didn’t know the Latin root of ‘mort’? They also thought it had a professional ring. Exactly, it sounds rather too much like ‘physician’ “
“Early undertakers tended to work as builders, joiners and carpenters, skills that translated to coffin-making at times of death in the village. This was often the case even in the early 20th century. The family would inform their doctor first to certify a death, and then the local ‘layer out’—usually a woman—would help carry out the ‘last offices’, attending to the needs of both bereaved and deceased. They would call on the parish priest to perform the Last Rites, and summon the undertaker to take measurements for a bespoke coffin, made in haste from sanded and polished hardwood, and sealed inside with wax and bitumen to avoid leakage.”
“The undertaker would return to the house to deliver the coffin, sometimes having to remove a window as the door was too narrow. The deceased, clothed in their best nightdress or Sunday suit, would then rest in the front parlour until the funeral, usually held three or four days after death. Sweet smelling flowers were placed around the room to absorb bad odours and the undertaker would visit to check on any unpleasantness. Embalming was only performed for wealthy clients, and it wasn’t until the 1950s that Chapels of Rest became established in funeral homes.”
“The typical cost of a funeral in the mid-1940s was about £20, which included the making of the coffin, providing four bearers, hearse and car, church fees and grave digger. The fee of half a crown was paid to the person who performed the ‘laying out’. With the average wage being only £2.75 per week, the cost of funerals today is comparable.”
The voice over fades out as we now wonder how this will be explained but its pretty clear what this means for Jeremiah Locke. A man who is essentially missing in action, but when he finally does show up at Monday Slam Jeremiah may again find himself in some very humble beginnings.It was time to get down to business as WCF ALL ACCESS appears across your television screen followed by that very familiar theme of Madhouse by Anthrax.
When we catch up with James Wolf he is of course studying up on all things strange. One of them being a man who made his home completely out of caskets. How some people use casket's as an actual bed in their daily lives and the list goes on but if it did well there wouldn't be a James Wolf promo to follow, and while that may make a lot of people happy James was always happy to spoil their day! The important man of the hour who hasn't been seen yet. James was hoping that would change but now it looks like he'll be putting another nobody out of their fucking misery! One thing he absolutely loves to do! Before he does mention one Jeremiah Locke he wants to make sure he at least his brief history covered. Even if the man is too scared to walk to the ring and face his own competition.
Walking around all of these weird things could be creepy. Others might think it was cool but James thought it was just strange but it was this deep study that would help put away his competition at Monday Night Slam!
Thoughts raced at speed comparable to light speed if you will inside of his mind. He had heard rumblings in the backstage area about this “Gentleman” Jeremiah Locke. How he was suppose to be the next “Break Out Star” the WCF had signed but all James could see was that the man was going to be known not as the next “Gentleman” with animalistic tendencies but a fucking lowly jobber that never was. Not because the WCF didn't take its chances on the man but because the man himself was too scared to really pull the trigger to show case just what he had to offer here himself.
Needing a break from all things strange and weird James takes a walk outside. In one hand is a cup with a lid and a straw. It's just Dr. Pepper. Stores close to Museums usually don't sell whiskey.... with that James is also ready to speak on this man who calls himself “The Gentleman” Jeremiah Locke.
Here we are, mere moments from Slam, and I'm gearing up for what will likely be another easy week. But before I prove myself right let's do the work just in case the man actually decides to stop being fat and lazy this week. Surprises tend to happen around me, and I hate surprises because you never know what to expect!
Now, I rocked you with the brief symbolism of Undertakers before speaking with you tonight! There is a reason for that and that is because I, take a huge “under taking” with the WCF every week with little to no reward, and I'm not complaining about it. I just do my job like you're suppose too while the WCF over looks me on opportunity after opportunity. There was a death by association reputation. People stopped calling themselves “undertakers” , and well you can read the rest. The reason for the added symbolism however was I was telling Mr. Jeremiah Locke know that this is the final nail in his career!
Back in the era of the Victorian West; where all of our cowboy legends were made people of that era used railroad ties to nail the coffins down. While a lot of people will say it was because of some silly superstition, the real reason is likely that materials were scarce, and they used what they had. This also prevented in leakage from the casket itself. You may be telling yourself that's a little morbid for me to explain. You are absolutely correct! But, I need you to understand, and take this stance on all failing careers. Especially regarding my opponent Jeremiah Locke. While he is off enjoying a vacation he dreamed up for himself I, on the other hand, will be taking him to task on just why he hasn't done anything for the WCF. And hey if the WCF wants to send nobodies my way to cut some dead weight I understand. We all have to do somebody else's dirty work every now and then but I'm not just going to make my name off of nobodies. I specifically want a championship here in the WCF. I'm growing impatient, and the more I look around here, the more the desire I previously felt for this business is boiling over.
That's bad for you Jeremiah beause it means I'm going to make short work of you, and then I'm going to get a closer view of Jay Omega, and Kennedy Matthews in that little tag match. What are my intentions? Well I guess we're just going to have to see when I get there. You know Jeremiah, its okay to be a gentleman. But when you're so much of a gentleman that you don't have any work ethic then that's a problem. A big problem, and then the WCF books you against somebody who is going to take out the garbage. The truth is that it really could have been anybody, but it ultimately ended up being me! While you're coming down that aisle all ready being so nervous that you've chewed your finger nails to the nubs I want you to remember something. I'm going to enjoy this! I'm going to enjoy putting you out of your misery so that next sack of shit that follows me doesn't have to bother with it!
James all of a sudden thinks of the landscape that is changing in the Hardcore Division, and suddenly he knows how he can get under both Kennedy Matthews, and Jay Omega's skin! But he never goes off topic and again he speaks about his current opponent.
Jeremiah when people look back on your legacy what will they actually say? My legacy is all ready cemented, and people here in the WCF, they hate that. It burns them alive inside! They all do the same thing any way. The blame individual X for getting heavy on the nostalgia, and then they turn right back around and when they do it, and in the context of how they do it then its suppose to be better than the other person. Do you know why that is Jeremiah? That's because wrestling runs on nostalgia. You can't possibly understand the future if you don't at least to some extent rely on the past. Everybodies career matters too. The things you've previously done aren't worthless. If they were you wouldn't still have a job. Yet, here I am taking another under taking for the WCF. Taking out their trash for them, and guess what? Next week it will be somebody else! Because that's how it works! I don't have the time or the patience to deal with your bull shit! You're making my life easier! Making it easier for my daughter to receive therapy when you don't show up, but you also don't give me any way for me to challenge myself and that's what pisses me off the most! But, you don't care. My words are idle and they're going in one ear, and out the other. However if you want to see what it's like to be animalistic I'll show you when I competely destroy you in that ring. You'll have done the smart thing. What's necessary! Quit before you've actually begun. Because you don't have the talent, or that special it factor it takes to stand toe to toe against me! You know it, I know it, and the WCF roster knew it as soon as this match was booked. Adios motherfucker, and good goddamn riddance! If there is a jobber purgatory for wrestlers I hope you end up there where you're stuck on losing. The button is stuck on repeat and you have no choice but to lose over and over again. That would be the perfect eternity for you Jeremiah. After I retire you at Monday Night Slam you can begin your descent in doubting yourself until you are ultimately forgotten about, and never heard from again! So Jeremiah, I'll see you at Monday Night Slam! I'll be getting my pay check early but I still have a little business to take care of while I'm there. So if you'll excuse me there is a little matter I need to address!
James did indeed hear Jay Omega's claim regarding the Hardcore Title, and it was now time for him to address it. Regardless of whether or not the WCF actually paid attention to it maybe just maybe they were going to take notice.
Jay Omega, correct me if I'm wrong but you don't know when the WCF is going to give you your shot at the WCF Hardcore Title correct? And just because you'll get a shot doesn't mean you'll win! I can make sure you don't! So I would advise you to keep your big mouth shut! Also you weren't here to see me beat your little go to boy friend Adam Young twice, and I also beat his stable members he sent after me! You see the difference between you and I? You like to talk out of your ass about shit you obviously have no clue about! While I did what nobody else had the balls to do! I actually challenged the champion to a match for the Hardcore title, but you see, there is an obvious disconnect going on around here on just what the Hardcore Title is, and what it stands for! It's not your title yet! I'm officially inserting myself back into my business, and you're going to be another casualty. I have a challenge for you now that I think of it! I know you were given an opportunity all ready for Kennedy Matthews Hardcore Title but what about if I beat you in a match I'm added into that Hardcore Title match and we make it a triple threat! This division was never going to be shaken up until I made my intentions absolutely clear! Do you need Kennedy's permission or do you accept?
Jay, I can see you have really low intelligence but it would be nice if you actually made some sense when you came out here to address me. I mean honestly, do you think I'm stupid, and I can't adjust what my original plan was? Kennedy Matthews wasn't brave enough to lose the belt to me so she thought she was taking a short cut in facing you but all roads lead back to me eventually, and I really don't give a shit who the place holder is. Whether its you, or Kennedy but we both know by now this place needs a change, and this WCF Hardcore Title needs a make over!
So just for a moment from a man whose held every incarnation of a “Hardcore” Title let's go over what it is. It's a staple to prove you are the best of the best. No excuses. All that you rely on is your blood, sweat, and tears, and your skill to get you by. That's all you have to rely on any way.
What it isn't?
It isn't a title that has non title clauses to it! In fact its usually a defend it or lose it title! It can be lost at any given moment so to keep this belt, and even to defend it makes it special. But the WCF has bastardized it! I'm ashamed to have to compete for a belt that is essentially a carbon copy of the TV Title! I mean this is a special attraction title! So what makes it special? Absolutely goddamn nothing! This isn't a competition problem! It's a WCF problem. I'm here to fix that Jay. I want the Hardcore Title to be as it should. So nobody can hide behind a non title match. Competition at is purest should mean everybody has a chance to be hardcore champion because in theory this special attraction belt is suppose to be the hardest to keep because you will do whatever it takes to keep it.
I'm not seeing that! So you can take your little trinket talk and shove it up your ass because clearly you don't have the IQ to understand what it takes to have a Hardcore Title, or keep one for that matter, and the WCF has no idea what it means to offer one! It fucking sickens me! So beside the challenge I made if you have any more question that are relevant you can ask. Other wise just shut the fuck up, and don't speak in matters you obviously have no knowledge in!
James then immediately goes over to a trash can and throws his empty cup into the receptacle. From there he notices a carnival in the distance. As he walks toward it we immediately fade to black. WCF ALL ACCESS COPYRIGHT 2019 is seen and then fades out
