“Forget the Church; Remember the Initials”
Jan 23, 2019 21:08:34 GMT -5
Corey Black, Stephen Singh, and 1 more like this
Post by Leon "Purple" Hayze on Jan 23, 2019 21:08:34 GMT -5
--Matt's Bullpen, forgive some of the...oddities...in this roleplay. Question marks, what are those...one wonders when they can't figure out an Italian keyboard that they never should have bought, and yet, when one lives in Italy for two years.... There's some other funky problems with this keyboard as well. I remember now, back in the early summer of 2018, why I bought this piece of shit. It's because I thought, oh well, I've been handy around a keyboard for a good twentyish years, why not just give it a try and fuck it. Now I'm thinking I should have gotten one from Amazon delivered. Hmmm, probably was too impatient. Anyway, it's buggin the fuck outta me, and I'm definitely picking up a regular keyboard/mouse set, now that I live in America again (Que up the Team America theme song, question mark) Also, I think I'm going to keep this Matt's Bullpen thing, lol. I'm not expecting credit from it, but...I think I'll stop this now...o.k. Bye bye, on to the roleplay...
P.S. That was resolved, but damn was it annoying for awhile!--
[Friday, January the 18th, 2019 – Portland, Oregon
The shot opens up to Leon Hayze, and for all the different chairs in the world that he might have been seated at, to see him sitting in the typical chair for a typical barber shop is the one he's currently lounged in—long hair and all. Even as the barber moves to one side of Leon and begins clipping, Hayze starts talking. He's happy, with a smile on his face—not the huge, stoned grin we might have seen on him, once upon a time, and his green pupils are framed by actual whites of the eyes, rather than any sort of shade of pink.]
L”P”H: That's right folks, hashtag it, share it on Facebook—if you're still on that shit—and any other social media platform you want: The Hayze Craze is back! Even if only a few folks are excited by my return, here in a few da...ahh hell, what am I goin on about? You're seeing this, Micheal X, after the fact of my return. Of course, I don't really know how that's going to turn out right now, but I can say this with confidence, even right now. Understand now X that, whatever match I'm booked into for my return, I'm going to make your last name a statement, whenever and wherever I can, because it's that important. It's a real easy one; we'll trade that X moniker for an actual letter X. On your forehead, and let's just call that X a target. And I have a few missile dropkicks, amongst other tools in my aresnal, that I fully intend on aiming toward that target. Micheal, please believe I'm not going to be missing that bulls-eye either. You either Singh, I don't give a damn what your status is, eventually you'll hear this and come around, or I'll come around, and force you to listen to what I have to say.
[Leon's bangs are noticeably short now, and the old barber's hands are deftly clipping for all their worth at the sides of Hayze's head now, before moving to obscure the camera totally by stepping in front of the wrestler's face.]
L”P”H: So it's like this X, and you, Singh, you need to know—and I know your lurking around Steve'o—that I'm not going to...hey Joe, can you get outta the way, I'm workin here?
Joe (the Barber): Can you let me work, how about?
L”P”H: Well...hmm...point taken my old friend.
Joe: Yeah, I thought so. Never really wanted a camera crew in here either.
L”P”H: I mean, it's one guy with a good—but not huge—sized camera, are you really suffering that much, huh? It's not like it's driving out business, for fuck sakes.
Joe: What'd I tell you about the f bombs?
L”P”H: What, you want me to put money in the swear jar, like we were one line characters in Luke Cage, hangin around Pop's place?
Joe: Luke who?
L”P”H: Oohhh man, you're sh...kidding me, right? Not a Netflix fan?
Joe: Cable t.v.'s been good enough for me since the 80's kid; I ain't changing now, no matter how much my daughter wants to 'help me cut the cord'. I like my cord just where it is! Thousands of channels...
L”P”H: Right, for like 80, 90 bucks or more, pass. Anyway, ya know what? Why don't I let you do your work actually, and I'll do mine later, hmm?
[Joe can just be seen to nod his head slightly, before moving to Leon's left side, working on that area now. Leon just makes a mock frown into the camera before the scene cuts out.]
[Tuesday, January 22nd, 2019 – Portland, Oregon
Leon Hayze is behind the wheel of a car, with the camera—shooting lesser quality video than we just saw—pointing at his face. He looks into it for a moment, before reverting those unclouded, green eyes back on the road.]
L”P”H: Right, this might work better actually. Lots to talk about right? So, why not take a long car trip. Like down to Reno, actually—which is where I'm heading right now. Gonna go meet a friend, stay a few days while I enjoy, I say with a question in my voice, some of Nevada's finest weed. Which is to say, at least of the last time I went to Mint, that I wasn't really happy with the quality. Probably stay the night in a hotel or maybe a cool Air B&B place tonight, and then my driving day tomorrow is just most of the day, instead of staying up all night to take advantage of some open, desert highway. Tempting, but I need my rest now; gotta wake up as rested as possible in the morning, so I hit that gym with as much fervor as possible. I mean, I'm going to need to stay in as tip top of condition as possible, if I'm going to take the Church of Singh down, I figure.
L”P”H: So where the hell have I been, why did it take so long, and why the bald head? Well, I'll explain that last one for right now. It speaks to new beginnings, of wiping the slate clean and starting over, despite whatever foul language that was on that blackboard before. It says to me, most importantly, that you CAN put that Purple back betwixt my name, that I'm embracing the past, but the same ol Leon isn't the Leon Hayze that's starting off the new year right! Happy, but focused. Fun, but in control. Lovin the dutch as much as Nigel Power's hated 'em, right, but not a hot dumpster full of weed type of fire, yeah? Sorry, just watched Goldmember the other night, so forgive the old reference. Hell, I'm guessing the WCF needed me almost as much as I needed it. But make no mistake friends, I needed it. I need to start that climb to the very top again; I know that about myself, I know I need to lift up that WCF Heavyweight title. More importantly now though, much more important? I need to redeem myself from the horrible person that was Saint Hayes. Leon Hayze though? He ain't so religious, so I don't know how to repent—not really. I don't really know about hail Marrys, and confessional, and any of it. So I'm not going to bow and scrape and whine for forgiveness. WCF fans, potential Hayze Crazers—I AM sorry! However, you'll forgive me in time or you won't, and that has to be o.k. with me. So how am I going to redeem my real, true sin? That of “turning my back” on my fans? Easy enough, at least on paper. I do everything I can to become more of a wrecking ball than Miley ever could have, and demolish the Church of Singh!
[The car comes to a stop as Leon hits some bad traffic. He grimaces into the camera, and though his right hand comes off the wheel for a moment, Hayze turns his head down a little and to where his hand was starting to go. Shaking his head slightly, the frown turns into a smile as he looks back up to the traffic in front of him.]
L”P”H: All that later on though; I'm patient enough, so it'll come eventually. To linger just a little longer on the subject though, man it was fun giving you a little token of my depreciation Mr. X! I mean, a LOT of fun. Like...maybe I shouldn't have enjoyed that as much as I did, but damn...whaddya gonna pretend to want a cheeseburger value meal when someone offers you a fat, juicy steak dinner instead? Naw, you say thanks sir or ma'am, sit down to your steak meal, and enjoy the shit out of it! Veg-heads, vegans; slap in something appropriate, ehh? Ya'll get the point I'm trying to make though. Micheal X and even you Steve Singh, you're gonna remember every boot you laid into my side, every hit to the back, every chair shot to the face. If you've never seen Annihilation, first off, what are you doing with your life? Second, let's just say that each of those hits are coming back to you two, refracted and refracted, and refracted another time just for good measure.
[Hayze shoots another glance at the camera, a hard look of determination in those green eyes that doesn't match up with the smile on the man's face.]
L”P”H: Well, old grudges—well deserved as they might be—can wait for awhile, because I need to address you Teo Blaze. Ya know, I like it man; your new persona, that is. Us facing each other, during my first match back. Yeah, it really works. I dig it man! Two men who've reinvented themselves in the past and, in my case, are doing so again. Jesus, what was I thinking back then?
[Leon sighs heavily as he makes slight head motions to look at his mirrors, before continuing on.]
L”P”H: I...I'm not talking about that right now. What's more important, at the moment, is what's right in front of my face. I mean, shit, talk about pressure right? First match back, and I'm thrust into the spot light with a Television Title match, and against a pillar that holds up the house called Wrestling Championship Federation. Fact is though Teo, if we're calling you a pillar of the company, I worry for the roof above our head, yeah? Your good enough T.B., but I'm L...P...H! Actually, I'm not worried over that roof, now that I think about it. I'll just insert myself into that spot, and then we've got an even stronger, sturdier brace in place. The brace that holds up the pl....naw, that doesn't sound good. Maybe something like that though. Maybe...
L”P”H: Anywhoooooo... Leon Hayze, in a Main Event match again...and deservedly so? At least this time. Not like those times I bragged about it in the past, and when only one or two of those appearances were really warranted. If I'm in that oh so bright and fantastic spot light again, from here on out, I mean to make it based on merit, and nothing else. No more hiding behind Singh, no more slinking around with Micheal X—it's just about Leon “Purple” Hayze and his opponent in a fantastic match. Ya know Blaze, you talked about ego, merit, accomplishments, and not getting that ego over inflated with pride. It's fine to have an ego though, right? It's fine to list off those accomplishments, yeah? It is, don't worry Teo. I'm not downing on you for that, don't be overconfident and all that. You've a long list of accomplishments, and well damn son, I'd be singing those praises up and down the block a few times before I felt like I let my voice rest a bit, ya know? Just ahh, don't lose sight of what's in front of you, and I won't either, right?
L”P”H: I've been talking a lot about the Church of Singh, Teo, and you gotta forgive me for that. I mean, I think any one would be entitled to spew some venom at those that put them on the shelf...for so long, ammiriiiight? Maybe not as long as they would have thought, and yet the equation is the same; the sum of that shitty math problem equaled me being gone for quite awhile. X didn't give it to ya though, I did. Grrrrr...just call me DMX then, cause I'm hungry dawg...woof! Hungry for lots of things, Teo Blaze—sorry, let me keep the focus on you. Forget my hunger for redemption and...well fuck...let's call a Bird Box a Shitty Movie...revenge. Ahh, but my hunger to climb to the top of the WCF mountain starts anew this week, and it starts with you Blaze. It'll be a fantastic match, and as I understand it, you've been an equally fantastic TV champ. Thing is, I'm hungry for more things than what I've listed above; I see a big, juicy...well chicken dinner, since I talked about hamburgers and steaks earlier. I'm gonna get me that chicken dinner Blaze, and I'll be a winner winner for sure. So T.B., sorry about your luck buddy, as well as that cheesy last pun/joke/thing. You've got a big ol t.v. dinner, in the form of that title, and this Hungry...fellow...is ready for seconds, how about that? Seconds on that TV title, and what a tasty meal it is (puts on a Gollum from the Lord of the Rings voice) preciousssss. (Normal voice again) Wow, my reference game is like middle style huh, rather than strong? Fuck it, ya'll get where I'm going with that.
[Leon looks over to the glove box again, as if in longing, and quickly looks back to the road, but his right hand does stray from the wheel for a bit. Soon enough, that hand is grabbing for that water bottle and taking another drinking, before setting it down quickly enough and resting it back at roughly three o'clock on that leather wheel.]
L”P”H: I promised myself to be a good boy this year. And since that happens to come with the new Leon Hayze, lemme say this. A lot less getting high on air, or being high—well...getting high on camera, at least. I mean, not completely right, but not nearly so much. I mean, it is me though. Look, it's like this my Ultimate Weeediacs! The Elder Gods spoke to me brother, and they said this. Be an advocate, and I won't stop crying that out when and wherever I can. Understand that I'm definitely getting high when I fly home, ya know, or any of the truly green states. If it's recreational in your town, WCF fans, I'm down! But I'm not blazing that joint in the glove box, I'm just not. It's not right for the whole legality thing, ya know? I'm not getting behind the wheel, period, if I'm not in for the night...or day, or whatever is. Ahhh, but enough about that. Teo Blaze, speakin of blazin it up, you do understand I have to get that win next Monday, right; I gotta smoke your ass like a pound of my sweetest cheba, dig? How do I make a true comeback, and get to that Heavyweight title around my waist, if I don't take what's around your's right now? I do, eventually, but to take it back on my first, true night back? Micheal X beat down not withstanding, for various reasons. Mostly, because I'm not through with you X, not by damn sight. But actually because me surprising you're stupid ass at the end of your match can't really be called a match, can it. No, it can't. I mean...well everyone gets what I mean.
[Hayze grabs the water bottle again, and takes another long pull from the thing, before giving a quick look at the camera in frustration.]
L”P”H: I'm doing you a disservice Blaze, and I don't mean it. You've taken off the mask since I've been...gone, and you haven't looked back, to use a cheesy, old adage. Jesus, you took the fuck off, is what you did, forget a face adornment. First ever guy to unite the Infinity stones. Lemme just say, I want some of those in my future; well all 6, shit. Ahh, but you earned those at ONE, and that's that. I'm not asking for that, but I am asking for greatness in that Main Event; you know I'm bringing mine, and I need to see you bring your's T.B. I need that, because when I do get you for the win, I'll have made just about the best kind of comeback you can. The Television title; I've lifted it before, and I can do it proud once again. Beating the guy who holds all the Stones, what does that say? Well, greatness, of course. It says I beat a guy in line for the World Title...which, well...I mean. Well...fuck it. I'm climbing in the line, I'm bidding my time, and I'm thinking about the T.V. title first. Thing is Blaze, it's about beating you, that's what this is really all about. It's one more great that I've had actually beaten, when I beat you.. I have to beat you, I have to know that I'm capable of what I talk about, beating you in my first match back. All the greater an achievement when I strap that T.V. Title around my waist again. You're a smart guy Teo. It's like this. You know what I really want out of this match? I want to earn an exclamation point, that I can put on at the end of this statement I'm putting out today.
[Leon doesn't look away from the wheel, but his smile widens into a true grin then.]
L”P”H: You consume it when you want T.B., just like a great Netflix show—but you're gonna feel my words live, and for those in Columbus that see it up close and personal like you? They're going to understand that those three little letters are back, for better or worse WCF, because I just don't know what the fans are going to think about all this. Aligning myself with slime for so long, I still have to have some coating my skin, right? I'll prove my answer of no emphatically, to those that I called my brothers, when I was last here. I'll prove it each and every time I run in to 'em in the locker room, if I see them in the corporate offices; shit maybe I'll hang out in the crowds for your matches X; I can do that. If it seems personal Monday night Blaze, it's not...it's frustrations being played about on your body, and I'm sorry for that. I'm not seeking forgiveness for that though, I'm just not, but I'm not happy to do it. But some times, you have to do those things you don't like to do, or don't want to do. Thing is, I just want that exclamation point, like I said, and your face just happens to be the first that I'll be punching and kicking: luck of the draw? That exclamation point though Teo, it says, to any people I don't know that don't know me, that I'm not just another new comer. I've been around folks; you know Blaze. You know what's coming, and I just hope you prepare for my Patty Labelle ass, cause this Leon's got a new attitude, honey! Whooooooooooooo! But seriously Blaze, one last thing. Don't over look me, you're resume is impressive, but mine isn't exactly either. Any people that don't know the initials, you will. It just takes time, but if you're curious, look up my stats. Look up my stats, Teo Blaze, in case you might have forgotten them while I was gone. Double Internet and People's Champion at the same time. Former Alpha Champion, former Hardcore champ—just ask one former world champion Bonnie Blue about that one—and lastly T.B., former Television champion. I might be new to some of my fellow competitors in the locker room, but you know that I'm not just another pretty face that's “fresh” to the block. I mean, I am that, in a technical sense. Especially this new sexy, bald look huh? That's fresh, I mean. Yeah, I like it too. Ahhhh, but anyway. It's like this T.B. You're very good; just look at that impressive list of accomplishments. I need to prove to the WCF that I'm better than you, than Blue, than Savage...than whoever is put in front of my face, here on out. Forget you know me, actually Teo Blaze, and I'll forget the masked guy I remember from before, and we can just have a great match, and I can just beat you. I'm not going to destroy you, or bury you, or any other harsh adjective one might wanna put in there. My demeanor's a little different, ya'll will see that, but it's not personal like that, like I said before. But you need to forget that old Leon Hayze, cause it's a new L.P.H. that you'll be facing on Monday night, and I only hope that you're prepared for it Blaze. I know I am...to be the Television champion again!
[Hayes grimaces at some thought not expressed aloud, and keeps the look of displeasure on his face as he continues on.]
[The grimace turns to a look of outright disgust.]
[There's a bottle of water from off screen that Hayes grabs up, takes a sip, and looks away for awhile. When he starts speaking again, he brings his attention back to our point of view.]
[Hayes takes another sip of water before continuing.]
P.S. That was resolved, but damn was it annoying for awhile!--
Leon “Purple” Hayze
in
“Forget the Church; Remember the Initials”
in
“Forget the Church; Remember the Initials”
[Friday, January the 18th, 2019 – Portland, Oregon
The shot opens up to Leon Hayze, and for all the different chairs in the world that he might have been seated at, to see him sitting in the typical chair for a typical barber shop is the one he's currently lounged in—long hair and all. Even as the barber moves to one side of Leon and begins clipping, Hayze starts talking. He's happy, with a smile on his face—not the huge, stoned grin we might have seen on him, once upon a time, and his green pupils are framed by actual whites of the eyes, rather than any sort of shade of pink.]
L”P”H: That's right folks, hashtag it, share it on Facebook—if you're still on that shit—and any other social media platform you want: The Hayze Craze is back! Even if only a few folks are excited by my return, here in a few da...ahh hell, what am I goin on about? You're seeing this, Micheal X, after the fact of my return. Of course, I don't really know how that's going to turn out right now, but I can say this with confidence, even right now. Understand now X that, whatever match I'm booked into for my return, I'm going to make your last name a statement, whenever and wherever I can, because it's that important. It's a real easy one; we'll trade that X moniker for an actual letter X. On your forehead, and let's just call that X a target. And I have a few missile dropkicks, amongst other tools in my aresnal, that I fully intend on aiming toward that target. Micheal, please believe I'm not going to be missing that bulls-eye either. You either Singh, I don't give a damn what your status is, eventually you'll hear this and come around, or I'll come around, and force you to listen to what I have to say.
[Leon's bangs are noticeably short now, and the old barber's hands are deftly clipping for all their worth at the sides of Hayze's head now, before moving to obscure the camera totally by stepping in front of the wrestler's face.]
L”P”H: So it's like this X, and you, Singh, you need to know—and I know your lurking around Steve'o—that I'm not going to...hey Joe, can you get outta the way, I'm workin here?
Joe (the Barber): Can you let me work, how about?
L”P”H: Well...hmm...point taken my old friend.
Joe: Yeah, I thought so. Never really wanted a camera crew in here either.
L”P”H: I mean, it's one guy with a good—but not huge—sized camera, are you really suffering that much, huh? It's not like it's driving out business, for fuck sakes.
Joe: What'd I tell you about the f bombs?
L”P”H: What, you want me to put money in the swear jar, like we were one line characters in Luke Cage, hangin around Pop's place?
Joe: Luke who?
L”P”H: Oohhh man, you're sh...kidding me, right? Not a Netflix fan?
Joe: Cable t.v.'s been good enough for me since the 80's kid; I ain't changing now, no matter how much my daughter wants to 'help me cut the cord'. I like my cord just where it is! Thousands of channels...
L”P”H: Right, for like 80, 90 bucks or more, pass. Anyway, ya know what? Why don't I let you do your work actually, and I'll do mine later, hmm?
[Joe can just be seen to nod his head slightly, before moving to Leon's left side, working on that area now. Leon just makes a mock frown into the camera before the scene cuts out.]
[Tuesday, January 22nd, 2019 – Portland, Oregon
Leon Hayze is behind the wheel of a car, with the camera—shooting lesser quality video than we just saw—pointing at his face. He looks into it for a moment, before reverting those unclouded, green eyes back on the road.]
L”P”H: Right, this might work better actually. Lots to talk about right? So, why not take a long car trip. Like down to Reno, actually—which is where I'm heading right now. Gonna go meet a friend, stay a few days while I enjoy, I say with a question in my voice, some of Nevada's finest weed. Which is to say, at least of the last time I went to Mint, that I wasn't really happy with the quality. Probably stay the night in a hotel or maybe a cool Air B&B place tonight, and then my driving day tomorrow is just most of the day, instead of staying up all night to take advantage of some open, desert highway. Tempting, but I need my rest now; gotta wake up as rested as possible in the morning, so I hit that gym with as much fervor as possible. I mean, I'm going to need to stay in as tip top of condition as possible, if I'm going to take the Church of Singh down, I figure.
L”P”H: So where the hell have I been, why did it take so long, and why the bald head? Well, I'll explain that last one for right now. It speaks to new beginnings, of wiping the slate clean and starting over, despite whatever foul language that was on that blackboard before. It says to me, most importantly, that you CAN put that Purple back betwixt my name, that I'm embracing the past, but the same ol Leon isn't the Leon Hayze that's starting off the new year right! Happy, but focused. Fun, but in control. Lovin the dutch as much as Nigel Power's hated 'em, right, but not a hot dumpster full of weed type of fire, yeah? Sorry, just watched Goldmember the other night, so forgive the old reference. Hell, I'm guessing the WCF needed me almost as much as I needed it. But make no mistake friends, I needed it. I need to start that climb to the very top again; I know that about myself, I know I need to lift up that WCF Heavyweight title. More importantly now though, much more important? I need to redeem myself from the horrible person that was Saint Hayes. Leon Hayze though? He ain't so religious, so I don't know how to repent—not really. I don't really know about hail Marrys, and confessional, and any of it. So I'm not going to bow and scrape and whine for forgiveness. WCF fans, potential Hayze Crazers—I AM sorry! However, you'll forgive me in time or you won't, and that has to be o.k. with me. So how am I going to redeem my real, true sin? That of “turning my back” on my fans? Easy enough, at least on paper. I do everything I can to become more of a wrecking ball than Miley ever could have, and demolish the Church of Singh!
[The car comes to a stop as Leon hits some bad traffic. He grimaces into the camera, and though his right hand comes off the wheel for a moment, Hayze turns his head down a little and to where his hand was starting to go. Shaking his head slightly, the frown turns into a smile as he looks back up to the traffic in front of him.]
L”P”H: All that later on though; I'm patient enough, so it'll come eventually. To linger just a little longer on the subject though, man it was fun giving you a little token of my depreciation Mr. X! I mean, a LOT of fun. Like...maybe I shouldn't have enjoyed that as much as I did, but damn...whaddya gonna pretend to want a cheeseburger value meal when someone offers you a fat, juicy steak dinner instead? Naw, you say thanks sir or ma'am, sit down to your steak meal, and enjoy the shit out of it! Veg-heads, vegans; slap in something appropriate, ehh? Ya'll get the point I'm trying to make though. Micheal X and even you Steve Singh, you're gonna remember every boot you laid into my side, every hit to the back, every chair shot to the face. If you've never seen Annihilation, first off, what are you doing with your life? Second, let's just say that each of those hits are coming back to you two, refracted and refracted, and refracted another time just for good measure.
[Hayze shoots another glance at the camera, a hard look of determination in those green eyes that doesn't match up with the smile on the man's face.]
L”P”H: Well, old grudges—well deserved as they might be—can wait for awhile, because I need to address you Teo Blaze. Ya know, I like it man; your new persona, that is. Us facing each other, during my first match back. Yeah, it really works. I dig it man! Two men who've reinvented themselves in the past and, in my case, are doing so again. Jesus, what was I thinking back then?
[Leon sighs heavily as he makes slight head motions to look at his mirrors, before continuing on.]
L”P”H: I...I'm not talking about that right now. What's more important, at the moment, is what's right in front of my face. I mean, shit, talk about pressure right? First match back, and I'm thrust into the spot light with a Television Title match, and against a pillar that holds up the house called Wrestling Championship Federation. Fact is though Teo, if we're calling you a pillar of the company, I worry for the roof above our head, yeah? Your good enough T.B., but I'm L...P...H! Actually, I'm not worried over that roof, now that I think about it. I'll just insert myself into that spot, and then we've got an even stronger, sturdier brace in place. The brace that holds up the pl....naw, that doesn't sound good. Maybe something like that though. Maybe...
L”P”H: Anywhoooooo... Leon Hayze, in a Main Event match again...and deservedly so? At least this time. Not like those times I bragged about it in the past, and when only one or two of those appearances were really warranted. If I'm in that oh so bright and fantastic spot light again, from here on out, I mean to make it based on merit, and nothing else. No more hiding behind Singh, no more slinking around with Micheal X—it's just about Leon “Purple” Hayze and his opponent in a fantastic match. Ya know Blaze, you talked about ego, merit, accomplishments, and not getting that ego over inflated with pride. It's fine to have an ego though, right? It's fine to list off those accomplishments, yeah? It is, don't worry Teo. I'm not downing on you for that, don't be overconfident and all that. You've a long list of accomplishments, and well damn son, I'd be singing those praises up and down the block a few times before I felt like I let my voice rest a bit, ya know? Just ahh, don't lose sight of what's in front of you, and I won't either, right?
L”P”H: I've been talking a lot about the Church of Singh, Teo, and you gotta forgive me for that. I mean, I think any one would be entitled to spew some venom at those that put them on the shelf...for so long, ammiriiiight? Maybe not as long as they would have thought, and yet the equation is the same; the sum of that shitty math problem equaled me being gone for quite awhile. X didn't give it to ya though, I did. Grrrrr...just call me DMX then, cause I'm hungry dawg...woof! Hungry for lots of things, Teo Blaze—sorry, let me keep the focus on you. Forget my hunger for redemption and...well fuck...let's call a Bird Box a Shitty Movie...revenge. Ahh, but my hunger to climb to the top of the WCF mountain starts anew this week, and it starts with you Blaze. It'll be a fantastic match, and as I understand it, you've been an equally fantastic TV champ. Thing is, I'm hungry for more things than what I've listed above; I see a big, juicy...well chicken dinner, since I talked about hamburgers and steaks earlier. I'm gonna get me that chicken dinner Blaze, and I'll be a winner winner for sure. So T.B., sorry about your luck buddy, as well as that cheesy last pun/joke/thing. You've got a big ol t.v. dinner, in the form of that title, and this Hungry...fellow...is ready for seconds, how about that? Seconds on that TV title, and what a tasty meal it is (puts on a Gollum from the Lord of the Rings voice) preciousssss. (Normal voice again) Wow, my reference game is like middle style huh, rather than strong? Fuck it, ya'll get where I'm going with that.
[Leon looks over to the glove box again, as if in longing, and quickly looks back to the road, but his right hand does stray from the wheel for a bit. Soon enough, that hand is grabbing for that water bottle and taking another drinking, before setting it down quickly enough and resting it back at roughly three o'clock on that leather wheel.]
L”P”H: I promised myself to be a good boy this year. And since that happens to come with the new Leon Hayze, lemme say this. A lot less getting high on air, or being high—well...getting high on camera, at least. I mean, not completely right, but not nearly so much. I mean, it is me though. Look, it's like this my Ultimate Weeediacs! The Elder Gods spoke to me brother, and they said this. Be an advocate, and I won't stop crying that out when and wherever I can. Understand that I'm definitely getting high when I fly home, ya know, or any of the truly green states. If it's recreational in your town, WCF fans, I'm down! But I'm not blazing that joint in the glove box, I'm just not. It's not right for the whole legality thing, ya know? I'm not getting behind the wheel, period, if I'm not in for the night...or day, or whatever is. Ahhh, but enough about that. Teo Blaze, speakin of blazin it up, you do understand I have to get that win next Monday, right; I gotta smoke your ass like a pound of my sweetest cheba, dig? How do I make a true comeback, and get to that Heavyweight title around my waist, if I don't take what's around your's right now? I do, eventually, but to take it back on my first, true night back? Micheal X beat down not withstanding, for various reasons. Mostly, because I'm not through with you X, not by damn sight. But actually because me surprising you're stupid ass at the end of your match can't really be called a match, can it. No, it can't. I mean...well everyone gets what I mean.
[Hayze grabs the water bottle again, and takes another long pull from the thing, before giving a quick look at the camera in frustration.]
L”P”H: I'm doing you a disservice Blaze, and I don't mean it. You've taken off the mask since I've been...gone, and you haven't looked back, to use a cheesy, old adage. Jesus, you took the fuck off, is what you did, forget a face adornment. First ever guy to unite the Infinity stones. Lemme just say, I want some of those in my future; well all 6, shit. Ahh, but you earned those at ONE, and that's that. I'm not asking for that, but I am asking for greatness in that Main Event; you know I'm bringing mine, and I need to see you bring your's T.B. I need that, because when I do get you for the win, I'll have made just about the best kind of comeback you can. The Television title; I've lifted it before, and I can do it proud once again. Beating the guy who holds all the Stones, what does that say? Well, greatness, of course. It says I beat a guy in line for the World Title...which, well...I mean. Well...fuck it. I'm climbing in the line, I'm bidding my time, and I'm thinking about the T.V. title first. Thing is Blaze, it's about beating you, that's what this is really all about. It's one more great that I've had actually beaten, when I beat you.. I have to beat you, I have to know that I'm capable of what I talk about, beating you in my first match back. All the greater an achievement when I strap that T.V. Title around my waist again. You're a smart guy Teo. It's like this. You know what I really want out of this match? I want to earn an exclamation point, that I can put on at the end of this statement I'm putting out today.
[Leon doesn't look away from the wheel, but his smile widens into a true grin then.]
L”P”H: You consume it when you want T.B., just like a great Netflix show—but you're gonna feel my words live, and for those in Columbus that see it up close and personal like you? They're going to understand that those three little letters are back, for better or worse WCF, because I just don't know what the fans are going to think about all this. Aligning myself with slime for so long, I still have to have some coating my skin, right? I'll prove my answer of no emphatically, to those that I called my brothers, when I was last here. I'll prove it each and every time I run in to 'em in the locker room, if I see them in the corporate offices; shit maybe I'll hang out in the crowds for your matches X; I can do that. If it seems personal Monday night Blaze, it's not...it's frustrations being played about on your body, and I'm sorry for that. I'm not seeking forgiveness for that though, I'm just not, but I'm not happy to do it. But some times, you have to do those things you don't like to do, or don't want to do. Thing is, I just want that exclamation point, like I said, and your face just happens to be the first that I'll be punching and kicking: luck of the draw? That exclamation point though Teo, it says, to any people I don't know that don't know me, that I'm not just another new comer. I've been around folks; you know Blaze. You know what's coming, and I just hope you prepare for my Patty Labelle ass, cause this Leon's got a new attitude, honey! Whooooooooooooo! But seriously Blaze, one last thing. Don't over look me, you're resume is impressive, but mine isn't exactly either. Any people that don't know the initials, you will. It just takes time, but if you're curious, look up my stats. Look up my stats, Teo Blaze, in case you might have forgotten them while I was gone. Double Internet and People's Champion at the same time. Former Alpha Champion, former Hardcore champ—just ask one former world champion Bonnie Blue about that one—and lastly T.B., former Television champion. I might be new to some of my fellow competitors in the locker room, but you know that I'm not just another pretty face that's “fresh” to the block. I mean, I am that, in a technical sense. Especially this new sexy, bald look huh? That's fresh, I mean. Yeah, I like it too. Ahhhh, but anyway. It's like this T.B. You're very good; just look at that impressive list of accomplishments. I need to prove to the WCF that I'm better than you, than Blue, than Savage...than whoever is put in front of my face, here on out. Forget you know me, actually Teo Blaze, and I'll forget the masked guy I remember from before, and we can just have a great match, and I can just beat you. I'm not going to destroy you, or bury you, or any other harsh adjective one might wanna put in there. My demeanor's a little different, ya'll will see that, but it's not personal like that, like I said before. But you need to forget that old Leon Hayze, cause it's a new L.P.H. that you'll be facing on Monday night, and I only hope that you're prepared for it Blaze. I know I am...to be the Television champion again!
[We cut to a black screen with white, plain text saying the following:]
Leonard Hayes
Hayes – Look, so now starts the explanations. Where the fuck have I been, likely the best question I've been asked. Usually nicer than that, but ya know what I'm getting at. I couldn't have been injured for that long right. No, not really. Not physically. No doubt about it—Micheal X and Stephen Singh beat the shit out of me real well. I was in a hospital bed for a little over two months. That time in my life is honestly a bit shakey. I was real pissed that I'd been put on the shelf, so pissed that those little plans of mine from back then fell away. Doesn't really matter anymore though, does it. I've been gone, and now I'm back, and those who didn't like me before just have to deal.
[Hayes grimaces at some thought not expressed aloud, and keeps the look of displeasure on his face as he continues on.]
Hayes – What a tease, heh. Fuck, well this part's going to be an ongoing thing. Part my frustrations with how things should have played out, part life on the road, part just what I'm thinking or feeling when I turn this on. For a while though, it's gotta be about the explanations. There's a lot of 'em, and it's going to take time for any fans that I can win back to except them, maybe. I can understand if it takes some time, ya know? I mean...well shit, let's start at the beginning for those that don't know what I'm about.
[The grimace turns to a look of outright disgust.]
Hayes – Why did the Church of Singh start up, what the fuck was I thinking, huh? Well, I”ll explain all of that, because it doesn't take long. Stephen Singh, if you're listening to this part, please believe me when I tell you that the following is all true. From my point of view, or that's the real truth of the matter, or I'm lying to save some face...whatever. You believe what you want. You and X think whatever you want, and the WCF fans can think whatever they want. I'll tell ya like this though; I'll tell ya how it should have gone down. Did I ever really hate on the fans, did I ever REALLY turn on the fans. Well, it sure as shit must have seemed so.
[There's a bottle of water from off screen that Hayes grabs up, takes a sip, and looks away for awhile. When he starts speaking again, he brings his attention back to our point of view.]
Hayes – It's like this Singh. Had things gone the way I had intended, I'd have lifted the WCF title by now, and have had done so laughing in your face. I did want the title, please believe that. And, as I saw it, I was doing anything to get it. As in, making someone I truly despised to believe I was in league with him. As in play friendly with some idiot that's far inferior to me—Micheal X. As in make you, Singh, believe that I would be subservient to you. I pretended though man, I did. I did some truly heinous shit, and I always felt like slime when I did my part in that play. You came around, you looked me in the eye, and you tried to sell me something. I'm thinking you might have bought it for a time, but I must have slipped somewhere. Before I could get to the title picture, before I could have won that theoretical championship and made my true intentions known to the WCF hopeful, you must have seen where my head was really at. So, well fuck me right, you and X beat me down. I mean, to your guys' credits, it was certainly in the top 10 beat-downs I've ever had in my life. So, ya know, kudos to you lot.
[Hayes takes another sip of water before continuing.]
Hayes – I'm not back peddling, I'm just telling it like it is. You guys beat my ass, good for you. You got the better of me before I could do the same to you Singh, congraturations but the princess is in another castle. Something you'll never catch me saying, from this moment on, is that either of you are better than me in that ring. X, you've been a tag partner of mine—go back and look at the footage, because you need to know what you'll be getting into, later. Singh, same for you, in a way. Did we ever tag...well I can't remember, honestly. It's not important though; either we did or didn't. Study that footage though Singh. You too will need every little bit of advantage you can get to, when I come around for you. And Singh? If I have to drag you out of hiding, or a semi-retirement, or if you've gone to join Trump's cabinet, whatever. Come prove me wrong, or try as best as you can, cause I'm not done in the WCF until I wipe the Church of Singh from existence. If I have to do it with my own two hands, and take out every nail, board, and jizz covered piece of stained glass, then that's the burden I have in front of me. Oh and lads, my arms, hands, shoulders, and back feel just fine!