A path of violence and destruction
Oct 24, 2018 19:04:29 GMT -5
Night Rider, Kaz, and 1 more like this
Post by Deleted on Oct 24, 2018 19:04:29 GMT -5
The scene opens up in a kitchen. It’s a larger apartment and seated at the table eating cereal is former WCF wrestler, Chester. Someone is seated in the chair next to him, holding up a newspaper, reading the inside of it. It’s the sports section and on the front page is an advertisement and article for WCF’s upcoming Helloween. A picture of Odin Balfore and Noble Savage is in the main picture. The date on the paper is from a week ago. Chester speaks to the person holding up the newspaper.
Chester: Did you watch War, dude?
An affirmative grunt comes from the person holding up the newspaper.
Chester: Man, Odin wrecked Bonnie. I was dying over that shit, watching her just get pummeled. It was great camera work and hearing the commentators try to frantically put her in a positive light during that match, making it look like they were evenly matched.
But the best part of the night was watching Noble Savage win War. It’s always fucking great to see someone new, especially a rookie win Wa---
Chester’s eyes grow wide and he looks up at the person holding the newspaper, who folds down part of it to glare at Chester, while not revealing their identity.
Chester: Fuck, my bad? Too soon? Well anyway, I was talking to some of the guys in your lockerroom the other day and heard a rumor that a couple of possible prospects had dropped out of being on Odin’s team. There’s honestly not a whole lot of names that could really stand up to The Guardians.
The man holding the newspaper suddenly puts it down revealing WCF Legend Gravedigger...like you didn’t know already. Gravedigger has a confused look on his face.
Gravedigger: The fuck did you just say?
Chester: Their team isn’t finalized either, but I’ve heard rumors that The Guardians are on the team opposing Odin Balfore.
Gravedigger: And there’s still open spots on Odin’s team?
Chester nods in affirmation. Gravedigger’s head turns to the camera with a smirk on his face as the scene fades out.
==============
The scene opens up again, this time in the WCF Studios. A swarm of makeup people and attendants surround a large, muscle bound man. As they start walking away, it’s revealed to be Gravedigger, wearing his trademark MS-13 biker jacket. Another man walks onto the set and is swarmed by the same group of people and once they peel away from him it’s WCF’s own Hank Brown.
Hank is eventually given the signal to begin speaking and he turns towards the camera while glancing at Gravedigger.
Hank Brown: Wow, I’m just in complete shock, Gravedigger.
Gravedigger smirks.
Hank Brown: I never thought I’d be interviewing you again here on WCF TV, Gravedigger. Hell, I never even thought I’d see you in WCF ever again especially after you started your own company. First of all, thanks so much for sitting down with me and second, how are things going over in your action-filled company?
Gravedigger: Thanks, Hank! It’s great to be interviewed by you again. Until I heard about the Helloween situation from Chester the other day, I never entertained the thought of returning here either. And things are going great in my company, but I won’t talk about that too much. I’m not sure how much of a sore spot that still is, plus that’s not why I’m here anyway.
Hank Brown nods his head.
Hank Brown: That’s understandable. So why exactly have you returned to WCF? Absolutely NO ONE expected that.
Gravedigger grins.
Gravedigger: Well, for one thing, Torture was pretty pissed. He thought I was leaving our company and returning to WCF full-time for another “one last run”.
Hank Brown leans forward in his chair.
Hank Brown: Well are you?
Gravedigger shakes his head.
Gravedigger: No, I’m not here for another run. I’m here for the sole purpose of helping Odin and the rest of his team win Hellimination.
Hank Brown: Is this to avenge your showing from last year and to also get revenge on Stephen Singh who will now be on the other team?
Gravedigger: No, that’s not it either. Although it will be sweet if I end up being one of the survivors for our team and also being responsible for Singh’s elimination. That would definitely be fucking sweet, but no, I’m just here to fuck up The Guardians’ night. It’s always the greatest thing to see them pissed.
Hank Brown: Well, recently War happened, which your brother told me is still a sore subject.
Gravedigger shrugs, with a look of confusion on his face.
Hank Brown: But I’m sure you probably caught this year’s pay-per-view and watched as rookie sensation Noble Savage won it and will now face Odin Balfore at One in the main event. What are your thoughts?
Gravedigger: Well, I want to say congratulations to Noble. As I showed in 2003 and then almost showed last year, War is a helluva match to win. It is not easy and is one of the most difficult matches to win.
Hank Brown: Do you look forward to facing her in the Hellimination match this week?
Gravedigger chuckles.
Gravedigger: Hank, I look forward to facing everyone in this fucking match. I’ve got no real goals, no plans, no pressure in regards to this match. My placing in this match won’t affect my WCF career nor my legacy. I’m not here to make one last run. I’m here just to fucking crush people and ruin their night.
Unlike Odin and the rest of the people on my team, the out come for this match won’t affect me at all. I’m here to break bones and end careers. That’s the beautiful thing about the position I’m in. There’s not a single thing on the line for me unlike everyone else. You’ve got people trying to keep from defending titles or getting title shots or people just trying to look good in a match of this caliber, then you’ve got Gravedigger.
I brought Mara Salvatrucha with me so you know I’m not playing around here. I want to leave as much violence and destruction in my wake as possible. I don’t give a fuck if I ruin the One main event by snapping Noble’s neck. I’ll snap everyone’s neck in this match on the other team so that Odin can just fucking chill out in the Bahamas for One and not even have to give a fuck about it.
Hank Brown: Any last words for the people watching this interview?
Gravedigger: I talk about leaving violence and destruction in my path, but it’s always been what I’m all about, and the WCF Universe knows that better than anybody. But at Helloween, I am unleashed. I am unchained. I will be unhinged. I have been released for one night only. Forget Jason. Forget Freddy. Forget Michael. It’s Gravedigger you have to fear. I don’t bring machetes or knives or bladed fingers, but Grave Markers and Death Drivers for all!
The scene fades out.
=============
The final scene opens up in a nicely designed, very lit living room. Gravedigger is seated on a large, black couch and a camera on a tripod sits across the room from him. Gravedigger hits a button on a remote that he points towards the camera and after a couple of seconds of gathering his thoughts, he begins speaking.
Gravedigger: Has the shock settled in yet for everyone watching me on WCF TV? Have you gotten over the shock of seeing Gravedigger in a WCF ring again? Are you going through those same emotions once more seeing me here in this promo? Don’t get too excited though WCF fans, because this is for ONE NIGHT ONLY. This isn’t yet another return of Gravedigger to once again climb to the top of the mountain. I’m here for Hellimination. I’m here for my boy Odin Balfore.
Speaking of emotions though, there’s some other emotions floating around in WCF right now: horror, fear, insecurity, self-loathing. Any semi-intelligent person would know who I’m talking about: The Guardians.
For those who haven’t met me before, and there’s quite a few new faces since I was last here in January, I’m Gravedigger and I co-own another wrestling company. I won’t be a douche and say the name, but let’s just say there’s a lot of ACTION there.
I’ll tell you what else is there: The Guardians. Not the same exact ones that are here in WCF, but a couple of their other members. The Guardians leave this putrid stench everywhere they go and this group is like an infection upon the wrestling world. No matter how hard people have tried over the years, they just can’t get rid of them. It’s not like they’re surviving because they’re successful.
Gravedigger laughs for a few seconds at that comment.
Gravedigger: No, no, see, they survive because they’re like cockroaches. They’re hiding under rocks and blades of grass and only emerge when no one is paying attention and they grab the smallest morsels of food or in this analogy, they grab the smallest little morsels of success in this sport. THE. SMALLEST. Bonnie Blue and Alex Richards. Two names that strike fear in the hearts of wrestlers everywhere, right? I’m serious people they do. They strike fear in everyone who has to climb into the ring with them because being in the ring with The Guardians brings down your career.
I’m good though, because my career, my legacy here is cemented. I have the kind of career and legacy here that Alex Richards and Bonnie Blue can only dream of. This isn’t UCI guys. You’ll never have that kind of success here. Hell you guys were in my company and you couldn’t hack it there either.
Let’s take Alex Richards. Former UCI World Champion...won a bunch of tag titles in multiple companies….not done much else in his career worth mentioning. This dude won the TV title in my company and the moment he lost it to a guy who’d just started his career, the dude retired from the sport. Yeah, Alex Richards fled the sport in shame. He probably cried like the fat bitch he is. What’s that? “But, Gravedigger, he’s here in WCF and he’s not retired.” Calm down, people, I’ll get to that. See, Alex Richards was booked in a match against Sam Kidsgrove and L Verez and those watching the show were forced to watch one of the most ridiculous moments in this sport when Alex Richards carefully cradled the head of each of his two opponents and lightly kissed them on the forehead before pinning him in his retirement match. Torture and myself were yelling at each other backstage wondering who approved this, but then we realized that only the Guardians could come up with such a hilariously absurd moment in wrestling. The lowest point in the night for our ratings was that match, but hey, it’s The Guardians so you come to expect it.
Let’s continue talking about you though, Richards. Last year we faced off in Hellimination and surprisingly to everyone including yourself you had a great showing even though you were eventually eliminated, but you haven’t done a fucking thing since. I could sit here and say the same exact shit about you that I did last year and sadly it would still apply. Alex, why don’t you do everyone a favor and just fuck off into the sunset already? You’ve been here a while and as you’ve done your whole career, you always show up and act like you’ve changed things and improved yourself only to be the same, talentless sack of shit you have always been and then you “retire” again.
At Helloween, I’m not going to hit you with some big moves and then pin you or make your fat ass tap out. Nah, I’m going to terrorize you. I’m going to bully the fuck out of you. I’m going to humiliate you. And look, Alex, I swear to God, if I see you pucker up your lips one fucking time in that match, preparing to kiss someone, I will get in the ring and fuck you up. I don’t give a shit if you call it your new move the Lip Lock. Your lips pucker, your ass will pucker next as I kick your teeth right down your throat. This is a fucking wrestling ring, not the set of The Bachelor, you fat sack of dog shit.
Speaking of people who should fuck off, let’s talk about Bonnie Blue. Another person whose only success was in UCI. UCI world champ in UCI and then held the same belt in my company this past summer. But again, not much else success outside of that. I mean you won a belt in my company earlier this year, but then you lost it to Anton Chase, a guy that rarely ever wins. You even got your ass beat repeatedly by Reece Shaw and Felix Stapleton, Jr., two other rookies. You didn’t lose to these people to put them over the same way legends like me do. No, these people beat you straight up, because they were more talented than you. Who loses to those types of people? OH WAIT, it’s YOU!
I brought you up because of mentioning the concept of “fucking off” and that’s what you did until this past week on Slam. You were in the main event at War against Odin Balfore and you lost your shot at the world title and what did you do? You do what Bonnie Blue always does. You fucked off to somewhere else. You tucked your fucking tail between your legs and limped on back home.
I’ve watched WCF for a while since leaving in January and I’ve watched you here in WCF during that time and I’m shocked that no one got mad at you for getting the shot at the world title at War. I was watching the shows and wondering why did Bonnie Blue of all people deserve the world title shot? You ate shit in the Ultimate Showdown match and you were eliminated first. Sure, you won nearly every match after that leading up to the week before War, but you were beating guys who are normally in dark matches or in the TV title divisions in most feds. Oops, sorry Alex.
That’s the question we have to be asking ourselves here when we think of Bonnie Blue is...Why Bonnie Blue? That’s probably the first time anyone has ever asked that question. That’s how little anyone cares about that talentless little shit nugget called Bonnie Blue. She comes strutting down the ramp like some stupid, autistic fuck, trying to show off her flabby “C-Section scarred body on a Tuesday night in a strip club” figure and tries to put up this aggressive front which looks equally ridiculous. But you know, every time she walks to the back and loses, which is often if she’s fighting anyone with even the slightest bit of talent, and she probably fucking cries her eyes out.
She cries her eyes out because she knows she can’t hack it. You have women like Sarah Twilight, and this is how bad Bonnie Blue is that I’m going to compliment Twilight, but you have a woman like Sarah Twilight who rose to the top of the fed and became the first woman in WCF history to become world champion. Then you’ve got a woman, and I use the term as loosely as Bonnie is when she’s in the Guardians lockerroom turning tricks to boost her self-confidence, she’s a woman who can’t fucking hack it.
I think I know what the reasoning was. The owners of WCF wanted to give Odin an easy win. They needed someone to fill a spot and who is better at that than Bonnie Blue? See, that’s all you’re good for is filling a spot. You’re never going to be someone’s first pick in this sport. No one is interested in watching your matches. No one is interested in listening to your promos, to hear that annoying, grating voice of yours on the mic.
Let’s talk real quick about something else from your return the other night, that cloak you were wearing. This is professional wrestling. Why the fuck are you wearing a cloak? This isn’t Dungeons and Dragons, bitch. This isn’t Game of Thrones. This isn’t Final Fantasy 20 or whatever the fuck number they’re on. This is professional wrestling. At least have some fucking creativity, but why should I be surprised?
The thing about you, Bonnie, is that you’re just not talented. You were given opportunity after opportunity in my company and nearly every single time you ate the mat and were pinned or forced to tap out. That’s all you’re ever going to be good at. Look at WCF here. You only beat the bottom of the barrel talent. I gotta ask you, how did it feel earlier this year when you watched Adam Young become the world champion here? How did it feel when he did something you’ll never be able to accomplish? This match has a stipulation that if your team wins, you get a world title shot at Payback, but that’s not fucking happening on my watch. The sport needs champions like Odin. What’s the point in your team winning for you to get a title shot? What the fuck are you going to do with yet another world title shot here in WCF? You’re going to shit the bed again in another match against Odin. You’re then going to run the fuck away again only to return either to my company to once again shit the bed there or you’ll eventually return here. Why put yourself through that? Hell, why put the FANS through that? Bonnie, you’re nothing and that’s sad because of who you are.
You’re supposed to be the clone/daughter of Johnny Reb, a Hall of Famer and multiple time world champion here in WCF. He won the title multiple times and he did it with ease. You know, I’m not up on my scientific/technological terms enough, but is there some kind of word for failed experiment? A term for a failed clone? In the movies, they typically take people like you and just throw them in the trash compactor, but for whatever reason you were spared. Bonnie, after Hellimination, when you pick up your battered, bruised body off of the canvas, just walk over to the nearest trash dump and throw yourself in where you belong and close the lid.
Because if you or Alex Richards come to Hellimination, you’ll get buried. I promise you both.
I’m not back here in WCF to play. I’m not here just to make an appearance. I’m here to help my Odin Balfore defeat the infestation known as The Guardians. I mean there’s no way I can completely rid WCF of you all in one night, but knowing the lot of you as well as I do, striking one major blow will set you back for months, long enough for Odin to finish the job.
Speaking of Odin, the WCF World Champion, he’s got this opponent at One. Noble Savage. The winner of this year’s War match. As a fellow War winner, I have to congratulate you, Miss Savage. Watching War, I did notice how talented you are, just be careful on this team with The Guardians as I can promise you that aligning yourself with The Guardians is akin to career suicide. Don’t believe me? Talk to your new friends. Ask them what happened to Jay Omega? L Verez? Jaice Wilds? Sam Kidsgrove? Polar Phantasm? Do I need to keep going? You probably don’t recognize any of those names because they’re the names of people who joined The Guardians and have had little to no success afterwards.
The Guardians think they’re a group of people with the determination to be a family and to watch each other’s back and build each other up, but they do nothing but bring each other down and really do nothing but fill up space on company rosters. See, they’re latching onto you as a beacon of success. Richards will never see anything more than a gimmick title or a tag title over his shoulder. Bonnie’s attempts at having a successful career ended the moment the referee slapped the mat a third time at War. They see your success, like they have done to others, and they befriend you in an attempt to make themselves look good.
But you, Miss Savage, you have talent. You will be successful in this company. You’ll hold multiple titles and maybe one day, the world title. Being part of The Guardians is going to do nothing but ruin your chances at that ever happening. Should you stick with The Guardians and not beat Odin at One, you’ll never see that kind of major match ever again. I know this as someone who has shared the ring with them. I know this as someone who watched them both from the commentary table in UCI where they did have success and from the back as their employer.
However, let’s get one thing straight about my compliments towards you. I say you have talent. I say you will have success, but I’m only comparing you with the talent that’s currently here. You’re not being compared with the people who were here in the past like Joey Flash, Jonny Fly, Corey Black, myself, Ethan King, Andre Holmes, Steve Orbit, Wade Moor, Roy Speede. The list could go on and on, Miss Savage.
No, see you’re being compared with people like Buff Mustache, Night Rider, Teo Blaze, Luke Force, Bonnie Blue, and Ultimate Destroyer. Those are your peers. Your only real competition here in WCF is Stephen Singh and Odin Balfore. You’re not sharing the ring with a whole group of legends and potential main eventers. You’ve been sharing the ring here with people who for the most part will be hired as greeters at Walmart.
Had you been here in WCF last year or earlier, you would have fallen flat on your face. You wouldn’t have been the next SJW, a rookie who stormed through WCF all the way to the top his first year. Your talent is limited. You ARE talented, but it has its limits. You’ll reach that limit at Helloween.
We’ve not been in the ring before and that will change at Helloween. I’ll go ahead and tell you now to prepare for a severe beating and a bad night. The Guardians will tell you different because they’re beady eyed little vermin who will spread all kinds of lies, but Singh will tell you the truth. Singh went to war with me and he barely survived.
Let’s finish this up with Singh though. I saved you for last Singh. Helloween. Hellimination. They bring back such great memories from last year’s event. The one where you stabbed me in the back and eliminated me from the match. You could have very easily cost WCF that match against UCI, but then again we were facing people like Bonnie Blue and Alex Richards….wait.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SINGH?! It’s like you’ve become worse since last year. THIS year, you’re essentially teaming up with UCI’s B team. Is it that you like a challenge? Is this why you’ve aligned yourself with The Guardians?
I’m looking forward to our encounter in the ring. The last time we faced off was at One where you defeated me, but like your teammates I have to wonder if you’ve truly improved? “But Gravedigger, Singh won the world title a few weeks after he defeated you”. You think this fucking impresses me? In the year of 2018 where guys like Adam Young held the world title. The year where guys like Dune returned just to win the belt. The year when guys like Michael X finally win the world title.
Like how fucking hard was it to win the world title in 2018? It’s like we’re having deja vu here like right after the Mexico Incident. Hashtag Mexico. Hashtag Never Forget. But no really, all 2018 has been is a repeat of people returning to the company and winning the belt again.
But despite you rising above all the people in WCF history who have only won the world title a single time, it’s like you peaked then. You went on and formed a group called Church of Singh. Hey, Oblivion’s Churck of the Dark Saints called and wants its gimmick back. You really are working the whole Thieven Steven thing even in 2018, right?
Now that I think about it more it seems more obvious why you sided with the Guardians in this. You saw that their team had already started forming and that Odin was outnumbered, but I know you practically shit your pants when not only Kaz walked out from the back, but when you heard my music hit.
Singh, you have lost your way. You lost your faction. This past week on Slam you lost your hardcore title to the fifteenth guy to use the word Wolf in his name in WCF history. Now you’ve already lost at Helloween again, just like last year. But unlike last year, I won’t be betrayed by you. I won’t be eliminated because of you either. I won’t be eliminated at all. I will stand tall as a member of Team Balfore and you’ll slink back into the shadows once more. Just ask The Guardians for directions to the nearest shadow. They’re good about hiding there.
Helloween is not going to be a great night for you. Aside from that very brief world title reign, 2018 hasn’t been a great year for you. This isn’t going to end like last year’s PPV. It’s not going to end like our One match did. Nah, see, it’s not just Stephen Singh versus Gravedigger. You’ve got a whole team of my partners to contend with and MS-13 will be there in force. You know first hand that I do not walk alone. You’re going to be reminded of that at Helloween when I crush your world. When I chew you up and spit you out. Stephen Singh, you’re not prepared to face me at the pay-per-view just like you were not prepared to hear my music and see me walk out from the back. You figured you’d seen the last of me the day you saw me on the news, opening another wrestling company.
You were excited, not for me, but for yourself because you thought you wouldn’t have to deal with me. Even when you showed up at Havoc earlier this year and was in one of our biggest matches to date, you were relieved when I didn’t attack you. All that relief has gone out the window and been replaced by those same emotions I mentioned earlier that describe The Guardians. You fear me and you fear what I’ll do to you in the ring. Maybe I’ll just put you out of your misery completely and end your career. Finish you off and discard you with the Guardians. Maybe you’ll do the smart thing and turn on them at Helloween. Maybe…
So, here we are again, nearing the end of Gravedigger’s first WCF promo in nearly a year. As I’ve been saying, this isn’t the latest return of Gravedigger to WCF. This isn’t me returning on another quest for the WCF world title. No, those days are behind me. I’m not here to get my name on people’s lips and get into the spotlight again, because any true wrestling fan has seen me on another channel all year long.
I don’t need to get into the spotlight. I...AM the spotlight. Everyone on the other team wants to be like me and have a career like me. In every way, shape, or form, none of you will ever have a career that can hold a candle to mine. I AM the benchmark and I will prove that at Helloween when I clear the ring and lay claim once more.
I’m here to display my dominance. I’m here to remind those in the lockerroom who I am and I’m here to fuck up the night for The Guardians. You all thought you had walked away from me. You all thought you’d left me in the mirror, but here I am to ruin your fucking day and I know the moment my music hit that you lost your shit and went out of your minds. Before any of them brag about how they left my company, let me remind everyone that they left in shame because they couldn’t hack it.
The Guardians act like this super famous, ultra talented group, but the truth of the matter is that they bore everyone and they’re all mediocre at best. When you’ve been in this business for more than three years and been in countless companies and have a single world title to your name or not even that depending on who we’re talking about then it’s time to take a step back and re-evaluate your career. Running a company can be stressful and Hellimination is going to be all about stress relief. It’s just too bad for The Guardians that this stress relief is going to come in the form of Grave Markers, Respectos, and Death Drivers.
Guardians...Stephen Singh. Come to Helloween, get buried. You’ve been warned.
Gravedigger reaches up to turn off the camera, but then stops and looks off camera at the sound of an inaudible voice.
Gravedigger: Who? Damian Kaine? No, I didn’t forget to talk about him.
Gravedigger chuckles.
Gravedigger: He’s probably not even going to show.
The scene quickly cuts to black.
Chester: Did you watch War, dude?
An affirmative grunt comes from the person holding up the newspaper.
Chester: Man, Odin wrecked Bonnie. I was dying over that shit, watching her just get pummeled. It was great camera work and hearing the commentators try to frantically put her in a positive light during that match, making it look like they were evenly matched.
But the best part of the night was watching Noble Savage win War. It’s always fucking great to see someone new, especially a rookie win Wa---
Chester’s eyes grow wide and he looks up at the person holding the newspaper, who folds down part of it to glare at Chester, while not revealing their identity.
Chester: Fuck, my bad? Too soon? Well anyway, I was talking to some of the guys in your lockerroom the other day and heard a rumor that a couple of possible prospects had dropped out of being on Odin’s team. There’s honestly not a whole lot of names that could really stand up to The Guardians.
The man holding the newspaper suddenly puts it down revealing WCF Legend Gravedigger...like you didn’t know already. Gravedigger has a confused look on his face.
Gravedigger: The fuck did you just say?
Chester: Their team isn’t finalized either, but I’ve heard rumors that The Guardians are on the team opposing Odin Balfore.
Gravedigger: And there’s still open spots on Odin’s team?
Chester nods in affirmation. Gravedigger’s head turns to the camera with a smirk on his face as the scene fades out.
==============
The scene opens up again, this time in the WCF Studios. A swarm of makeup people and attendants surround a large, muscle bound man. As they start walking away, it’s revealed to be Gravedigger, wearing his trademark MS-13 biker jacket. Another man walks onto the set and is swarmed by the same group of people and once they peel away from him it’s WCF’s own Hank Brown.
Hank is eventually given the signal to begin speaking and he turns towards the camera while glancing at Gravedigger.
Hank Brown: Wow, I’m just in complete shock, Gravedigger.
Gravedigger smirks.
Hank Brown: I never thought I’d be interviewing you again here on WCF TV, Gravedigger. Hell, I never even thought I’d see you in WCF ever again especially after you started your own company. First of all, thanks so much for sitting down with me and second, how are things going over in your action-filled company?
Gravedigger: Thanks, Hank! It’s great to be interviewed by you again. Until I heard about the Helloween situation from Chester the other day, I never entertained the thought of returning here either. And things are going great in my company, but I won’t talk about that too much. I’m not sure how much of a sore spot that still is, plus that’s not why I’m here anyway.
Hank Brown nods his head.
Hank Brown: That’s understandable. So why exactly have you returned to WCF? Absolutely NO ONE expected that.
Gravedigger grins.
Gravedigger: Well, for one thing, Torture was pretty pissed. He thought I was leaving our company and returning to WCF full-time for another “one last run”.
Hank Brown leans forward in his chair.
Hank Brown: Well are you?
Gravedigger shakes his head.
Gravedigger: No, I’m not here for another run. I’m here for the sole purpose of helping Odin and the rest of his team win Hellimination.
Hank Brown: Is this to avenge your showing from last year and to also get revenge on Stephen Singh who will now be on the other team?
Gravedigger: No, that’s not it either. Although it will be sweet if I end up being one of the survivors for our team and also being responsible for Singh’s elimination. That would definitely be fucking sweet, but no, I’m just here to fuck up The Guardians’ night. It’s always the greatest thing to see them pissed.
Hank Brown: Well, recently War happened, which your brother told me is still a sore subject.
Gravedigger shrugs, with a look of confusion on his face.
Hank Brown: But I’m sure you probably caught this year’s pay-per-view and watched as rookie sensation Noble Savage won it and will now face Odin Balfore at One in the main event. What are your thoughts?
Gravedigger: Well, I want to say congratulations to Noble. As I showed in 2003 and then almost showed last year, War is a helluva match to win. It is not easy and is one of the most difficult matches to win.
Hank Brown: Do you look forward to facing her in the Hellimination match this week?
Gravedigger chuckles.
Gravedigger: Hank, I look forward to facing everyone in this fucking match. I’ve got no real goals, no plans, no pressure in regards to this match. My placing in this match won’t affect my WCF career nor my legacy. I’m not here to make one last run. I’m here just to fucking crush people and ruin their night.
Unlike Odin and the rest of the people on my team, the out come for this match won’t affect me at all. I’m here to break bones and end careers. That’s the beautiful thing about the position I’m in. There’s not a single thing on the line for me unlike everyone else. You’ve got people trying to keep from defending titles or getting title shots or people just trying to look good in a match of this caliber, then you’ve got Gravedigger.
I brought Mara Salvatrucha with me so you know I’m not playing around here. I want to leave as much violence and destruction in my wake as possible. I don’t give a fuck if I ruin the One main event by snapping Noble’s neck. I’ll snap everyone’s neck in this match on the other team so that Odin can just fucking chill out in the Bahamas for One and not even have to give a fuck about it.
Hank Brown: Any last words for the people watching this interview?
Gravedigger: I talk about leaving violence and destruction in my path, but it’s always been what I’m all about, and the WCF Universe knows that better than anybody. But at Helloween, I am unleashed. I am unchained. I will be unhinged. I have been released for one night only. Forget Jason. Forget Freddy. Forget Michael. It’s Gravedigger you have to fear. I don’t bring machetes or knives or bladed fingers, but Grave Markers and Death Drivers for all!
The scene fades out.
=============
The final scene opens up in a nicely designed, very lit living room. Gravedigger is seated on a large, black couch and a camera on a tripod sits across the room from him. Gravedigger hits a button on a remote that he points towards the camera and after a couple of seconds of gathering his thoughts, he begins speaking.
Gravedigger: Has the shock settled in yet for everyone watching me on WCF TV? Have you gotten over the shock of seeing Gravedigger in a WCF ring again? Are you going through those same emotions once more seeing me here in this promo? Don’t get too excited though WCF fans, because this is for ONE NIGHT ONLY. This isn’t yet another return of Gravedigger to once again climb to the top of the mountain. I’m here for Hellimination. I’m here for my boy Odin Balfore.
Speaking of emotions though, there’s some other emotions floating around in WCF right now: horror, fear, insecurity, self-loathing. Any semi-intelligent person would know who I’m talking about: The Guardians.
For those who haven’t met me before, and there’s quite a few new faces since I was last here in January, I’m Gravedigger and I co-own another wrestling company. I won’t be a douche and say the name, but let’s just say there’s a lot of ACTION there.
I’ll tell you what else is there: The Guardians. Not the same exact ones that are here in WCF, but a couple of their other members. The Guardians leave this putrid stench everywhere they go and this group is like an infection upon the wrestling world. No matter how hard people have tried over the years, they just can’t get rid of them. It’s not like they’re surviving because they’re successful.
Gravedigger laughs for a few seconds at that comment.
Gravedigger: No, no, see, they survive because they’re like cockroaches. They’re hiding under rocks and blades of grass and only emerge when no one is paying attention and they grab the smallest morsels of food or in this analogy, they grab the smallest little morsels of success in this sport. THE. SMALLEST. Bonnie Blue and Alex Richards. Two names that strike fear in the hearts of wrestlers everywhere, right? I’m serious people they do. They strike fear in everyone who has to climb into the ring with them because being in the ring with The Guardians brings down your career.
I’m good though, because my career, my legacy here is cemented. I have the kind of career and legacy here that Alex Richards and Bonnie Blue can only dream of. This isn’t UCI guys. You’ll never have that kind of success here. Hell you guys were in my company and you couldn’t hack it there either.
Let’s take Alex Richards. Former UCI World Champion...won a bunch of tag titles in multiple companies….not done much else in his career worth mentioning. This dude won the TV title in my company and the moment he lost it to a guy who’d just started his career, the dude retired from the sport. Yeah, Alex Richards fled the sport in shame. He probably cried like the fat bitch he is. What’s that? “But, Gravedigger, he’s here in WCF and he’s not retired.” Calm down, people, I’ll get to that. See, Alex Richards was booked in a match against Sam Kidsgrove and L Verez and those watching the show were forced to watch one of the most ridiculous moments in this sport when Alex Richards carefully cradled the head of each of his two opponents and lightly kissed them on the forehead before pinning him in his retirement match. Torture and myself were yelling at each other backstage wondering who approved this, but then we realized that only the Guardians could come up with such a hilariously absurd moment in wrestling. The lowest point in the night for our ratings was that match, but hey, it’s The Guardians so you come to expect it.
Let’s continue talking about you though, Richards. Last year we faced off in Hellimination and surprisingly to everyone including yourself you had a great showing even though you were eventually eliminated, but you haven’t done a fucking thing since. I could sit here and say the same exact shit about you that I did last year and sadly it would still apply. Alex, why don’t you do everyone a favor and just fuck off into the sunset already? You’ve been here a while and as you’ve done your whole career, you always show up and act like you’ve changed things and improved yourself only to be the same, talentless sack of shit you have always been and then you “retire” again.
At Helloween, I’m not going to hit you with some big moves and then pin you or make your fat ass tap out. Nah, I’m going to terrorize you. I’m going to bully the fuck out of you. I’m going to humiliate you. And look, Alex, I swear to God, if I see you pucker up your lips one fucking time in that match, preparing to kiss someone, I will get in the ring and fuck you up. I don’t give a shit if you call it your new move the Lip Lock. Your lips pucker, your ass will pucker next as I kick your teeth right down your throat. This is a fucking wrestling ring, not the set of The Bachelor, you fat sack of dog shit.
Speaking of people who should fuck off, let’s talk about Bonnie Blue. Another person whose only success was in UCI. UCI world champ in UCI and then held the same belt in my company this past summer. But again, not much else success outside of that. I mean you won a belt in my company earlier this year, but then you lost it to Anton Chase, a guy that rarely ever wins. You even got your ass beat repeatedly by Reece Shaw and Felix Stapleton, Jr., two other rookies. You didn’t lose to these people to put them over the same way legends like me do. No, these people beat you straight up, because they were more talented than you. Who loses to those types of people? OH WAIT, it’s YOU!
I brought you up because of mentioning the concept of “fucking off” and that’s what you did until this past week on Slam. You were in the main event at War against Odin Balfore and you lost your shot at the world title and what did you do? You do what Bonnie Blue always does. You fucked off to somewhere else. You tucked your fucking tail between your legs and limped on back home.
I’ve watched WCF for a while since leaving in January and I’ve watched you here in WCF during that time and I’m shocked that no one got mad at you for getting the shot at the world title at War. I was watching the shows and wondering why did Bonnie Blue of all people deserve the world title shot? You ate shit in the Ultimate Showdown match and you were eliminated first. Sure, you won nearly every match after that leading up to the week before War, but you were beating guys who are normally in dark matches or in the TV title divisions in most feds. Oops, sorry Alex.
That’s the question we have to be asking ourselves here when we think of Bonnie Blue is...Why Bonnie Blue? That’s probably the first time anyone has ever asked that question. That’s how little anyone cares about that talentless little shit nugget called Bonnie Blue. She comes strutting down the ramp like some stupid, autistic fuck, trying to show off her flabby “C-Section scarred body on a Tuesday night in a strip club” figure and tries to put up this aggressive front which looks equally ridiculous. But you know, every time she walks to the back and loses, which is often if she’s fighting anyone with even the slightest bit of talent, and she probably fucking cries her eyes out.
She cries her eyes out because she knows she can’t hack it. You have women like Sarah Twilight, and this is how bad Bonnie Blue is that I’m going to compliment Twilight, but you have a woman like Sarah Twilight who rose to the top of the fed and became the first woman in WCF history to become world champion. Then you’ve got a woman, and I use the term as loosely as Bonnie is when she’s in the Guardians lockerroom turning tricks to boost her self-confidence, she’s a woman who can’t fucking hack it.
I think I know what the reasoning was. The owners of WCF wanted to give Odin an easy win. They needed someone to fill a spot and who is better at that than Bonnie Blue? See, that’s all you’re good for is filling a spot. You’re never going to be someone’s first pick in this sport. No one is interested in watching your matches. No one is interested in listening to your promos, to hear that annoying, grating voice of yours on the mic.
Let’s talk real quick about something else from your return the other night, that cloak you were wearing. This is professional wrestling. Why the fuck are you wearing a cloak? This isn’t Dungeons and Dragons, bitch. This isn’t Game of Thrones. This isn’t Final Fantasy 20 or whatever the fuck number they’re on. This is professional wrestling. At least have some fucking creativity, but why should I be surprised?
The thing about you, Bonnie, is that you’re just not talented. You were given opportunity after opportunity in my company and nearly every single time you ate the mat and were pinned or forced to tap out. That’s all you’re ever going to be good at. Look at WCF here. You only beat the bottom of the barrel talent. I gotta ask you, how did it feel earlier this year when you watched Adam Young become the world champion here? How did it feel when he did something you’ll never be able to accomplish? This match has a stipulation that if your team wins, you get a world title shot at Payback, but that’s not fucking happening on my watch. The sport needs champions like Odin. What’s the point in your team winning for you to get a title shot? What the fuck are you going to do with yet another world title shot here in WCF? You’re going to shit the bed again in another match against Odin. You’re then going to run the fuck away again only to return either to my company to once again shit the bed there or you’ll eventually return here. Why put yourself through that? Hell, why put the FANS through that? Bonnie, you’re nothing and that’s sad because of who you are.
You’re supposed to be the clone/daughter of Johnny Reb, a Hall of Famer and multiple time world champion here in WCF. He won the title multiple times and he did it with ease. You know, I’m not up on my scientific/technological terms enough, but is there some kind of word for failed experiment? A term for a failed clone? In the movies, they typically take people like you and just throw them in the trash compactor, but for whatever reason you were spared. Bonnie, after Hellimination, when you pick up your battered, bruised body off of the canvas, just walk over to the nearest trash dump and throw yourself in where you belong and close the lid.
Because if you or Alex Richards come to Hellimination, you’ll get buried. I promise you both.
I’m not back here in WCF to play. I’m not here just to make an appearance. I’m here to help my Odin Balfore defeat the infestation known as The Guardians. I mean there’s no way I can completely rid WCF of you all in one night, but knowing the lot of you as well as I do, striking one major blow will set you back for months, long enough for Odin to finish the job.
Speaking of Odin, the WCF World Champion, he’s got this opponent at One. Noble Savage. The winner of this year’s War match. As a fellow War winner, I have to congratulate you, Miss Savage. Watching War, I did notice how talented you are, just be careful on this team with The Guardians as I can promise you that aligning yourself with The Guardians is akin to career suicide. Don’t believe me? Talk to your new friends. Ask them what happened to Jay Omega? L Verez? Jaice Wilds? Sam Kidsgrove? Polar Phantasm? Do I need to keep going? You probably don’t recognize any of those names because they’re the names of people who joined The Guardians and have had little to no success afterwards.
The Guardians think they’re a group of people with the determination to be a family and to watch each other’s back and build each other up, but they do nothing but bring each other down and really do nothing but fill up space on company rosters. See, they’re latching onto you as a beacon of success. Richards will never see anything more than a gimmick title or a tag title over his shoulder. Bonnie’s attempts at having a successful career ended the moment the referee slapped the mat a third time at War. They see your success, like they have done to others, and they befriend you in an attempt to make themselves look good.
But you, Miss Savage, you have talent. You will be successful in this company. You’ll hold multiple titles and maybe one day, the world title. Being part of The Guardians is going to do nothing but ruin your chances at that ever happening. Should you stick with The Guardians and not beat Odin at One, you’ll never see that kind of major match ever again. I know this as someone who has shared the ring with them. I know this as someone who watched them both from the commentary table in UCI where they did have success and from the back as their employer.
However, let’s get one thing straight about my compliments towards you. I say you have talent. I say you will have success, but I’m only comparing you with the talent that’s currently here. You’re not being compared with the people who were here in the past like Joey Flash, Jonny Fly, Corey Black, myself, Ethan King, Andre Holmes, Steve Orbit, Wade Moor, Roy Speede. The list could go on and on, Miss Savage.
No, see you’re being compared with people like Buff Mustache, Night Rider, Teo Blaze, Luke Force, Bonnie Blue, and Ultimate Destroyer. Those are your peers. Your only real competition here in WCF is Stephen Singh and Odin Balfore. You’re not sharing the ring with a whole group of legends and potential main eventers. You’ve been sharing the ring here with people who for the most part will be hired as greeters at Walmart.
Had you been here in WCF last year or earlier, you would have fallen flat on your face. You wouldn’t have been the next SJW, a rookie who stormed through WCF all the way to the top his first year. Your talent is limited. You ARE talented, but it has its limits. You’ll reach that limit at Helloween.
We’ve not been in the ring before and that will change at Helloween. I’ll go ahead and tell you now to prepare for a severe beating and a bad night. The Guardians will tell you different because they’re beady eyed little vermin who will spread all kinds of lies, but Singh will tell you the truth. Singh went to war with me and he barely survived.
Let’s finish this up with Singh though. I saved you for last Singh. Helloween. Hellimination. They bring back such great memories from last year’s event. The one where you stabbed me in the back and eliminated me from the match. You could have very easily cost WCF that match against UCI, but then again we were facing people like Bonnie Blue and Alex Richards….wait.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SINGH?! It’s like you’ve become worse since last year. THIS year, you’re essentially teaming up with UCI’s B team. Is it that you like a challenge? Is this why you’ve aligned yourself with The Guardians?
I’m looking forward to our encounter in the ring. The last time we faced off was at One where you defeated me, but like your teammates I have to wonder if you’ve truly improved? “But Gravedigger, Singh won the world title a few weeks after he defeated you”. You think this fucking impresses me? In the year of 2018 where guys like Adam Young held the world title. The year where guys like Dune returned just to win the belt. The year when guys like Michael X finally win the world title.
Like how fucking hard was it to win the world title in 2018? It’s like we’re having deja vu here like right after the Mexico Incident. Hashtag Mexico. Hashtag Never Forget. But no really, all 2018 has been is a repeat of people returning to the company and winning the belt again.
But despite you rising above all the people in WCF history who have only won the world title a single time, it’s like you peaked then. You went on and formed a group called Church of Singh. Hey, Oblivion’s Churck of the Dark Saints called and wants its gimmick back. You really are working the whole Thieven Steven thing even in 2018, right?
Now that I think about it more it seems more obvious why you sided with the Guardians in this. You saw that their team had already started forming and that Odin was outnumbered, but I know you practically shit your pants when not only Kaz walked out from the back, but when you heard my music hit.
Singh, you have lost your way. You lost your faction. This past week on Slam you lost your hardcore title to the fifteenth guy to use the word Wolf in his name in WCF history. Now you’ve already lost at Helloween again, just like last year. But unlike last year, I won’t be betrayed by you. I won’t be eliminated because of you either. I won’t be eliminated at all. I will stand tall as a member of Team Balfore and you’ll slink back into the shadows once more. Just ask The Guardians for directions to the nearest shadow. They’re good about hiding there.
Helloween is not going to be a great night for you. Aside from that very brief world title reign, 2018 hasn’t been a great year for you. This isn’t going to end like last year’s PPV. It’s not going to end like our One match did. Nah, see, it’s not just Stephen Singh versus Gravedigger. You’ve got a whole team of my partners to contend with and MS-13 will be there in force. You know first hand that I do not walk alone. You’re going to be reminded of that at Helloween when I crush your world. When I chew you up and spit you out. Stephen Singh, you’re not prepared to face me at the pay-per-view just like you were not prepared to hear my music and see me walk out from the back. You figured you’d seen the last of me the day you saw me on the news, opening another wrestling company.
You were excited, not for me, but for yourself because you thought you wouldn’t have to deal with me. Even when you showed up at Havoc earlier this year and was in one of our biggest matches to date, you were relieved when I didn’t attack you. All that relief has gone out the window and been replaced by those same emotions I mentioned earlier that describe The Guardians. You fear me and you fear what I’ll do to you in the ring. Maybe I’ll just put you out of your misery completely and end your career. Finish you off and discard you with the Guardians. Maybe you’ll do the smart thing and turn on them at Helloween. Maybe…
So, here we are again, nearing the end of Gravedigger’s first WCF promo in nearly a year. As I’ve been saying, this isn’t the latest return of Gravedigger to WCF. This isn’t me returning on another quest for the WCF world title. No, those days are behind me. I’m not here to get my name on people’s lips and get into the spotlight again, because any true wrestling fan has seen me on another channel all year long.
I don’t need to get into the spotlight. I...AM the spotlight. Everyone on the other team wants to be like me and have a career like me. In every way, shape, or form, none of you will ever have a career that can hold a candle to mine. I AM the benchmark and I will prove that at Helloween when I clear the ring and lay claim once more.
I’m here to display my dominance. I’m here to remind those in the lockerroom who I am and I’m here to fuck up the night for The Guardians. You all thought you had walked away from me. You all thought you’d left me in the mirror, but here I am to ruin your fucking day and I know the moment my music hit that you lost your shit and went out of your minds. Before any of them brag about how they left my company, let me remind everyone that they left in shame because they couldn’t hack it.
The Guardians act like this super famous, ultra talented group, but the truth of the matter is that they bore everyone and they’re all mediocre at best. When you’ve been in this business for more than three years and been in countless companies and have a single world title to your name or not even that depending on who we’re talking about then it’s time to take a step back and re-evaluate your career. Running a company can be stressful and Hellimination is going to be all about stress relief. It’s just too bad for The Guardians that this stress relief is going to come in the form of Grave Markers, Respectos, and Death Drivers.
Guardians...Stephen Singh. Come to Helloween, get buried. You’ve been warned.
Gravedigger reaches up to turn off the camera, but then stops and looks off camera at the sound of an inaudible voice.
Gravedigger: Who? Damian Kaine? No, I didn’t forget to talk about him.
Gravedigger chuckles.
Gravedigger: He’s probably not even going to show.
The scene quickly cuts to black.
