Beards, Ratios and Fast Metabolism
Sept 29, 2018 22:50:54 GMT -5
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Alex Richards, Bonnie Blue, and 1 more like this
Post by 'Jazzy' John McCarty on Sept 29, 2018 22:50:54 GMT -5
It was a cold September's night, and a mysterious hooded figure was wondering through the streets of New Orleans. Those who saw him that night really couldn't say much, except that he was wearing black. Black hoodie, black trousers, black shoes. It was late, and the House of Blues was quiet that night, so the bartender decided to close early. The hooded figure storms in as the bartender is about to turn off the lights.
Bartender: Excuse me, sir, but we're closed.
The figure takes off his hood.
Bartender: No way...
John: How's it going?
It turns out that the one and the only 'Jazzy' John McCarty was under the hood, wandering around the streets of New Orleans.
Bartender: Where were you?
John: Not here.
Bartender: And the beard! You grew a beard!
John: It happens when you don't shave.
Bartender: Jeez, it's actually been quite... Um... Un-entertaining without you here.
John: Well, thank you.
Bartender: Come over and sit down at the bar, I'll whip up a beer on the house.
John walks over to the bar as the Bartender quickly walks behind the bar stand.
John: I actually miss this. Been a while since my last drink.
John and the Bartender were alone in the House of Blues, having a friendly conversation.
Bartender: So, tell me what happened. I have so many questions. Why did you stop wrestling? Where did you go? When are you wrestling again?
John: Well... I stopped because I could, I went away, and I'm wrestling at WAR.
Bartender <as he gives some beer to John>: Hmm... You're not as talkative as you used to. Tell me, do you still talk shit about your opponents?
John: I can try.
Bartender: Great! WCF actually just released a list of all the WAR competitors! How come you're not in the list?
John: Uh... Um... Ah...
Bartender: Never mind. Alex Richards. Tell me about him.
John: Alex Richards. He's a cool guy. In fact, I've had a couple glasses of Zim-Quilla myself. Of course, Alex is the guy who created Zim-Quilla.
Bartender: Anything else?
John: That's really all you thought I was gonna say? I still need to talk shit about him.
Bartender: Proceed.
John: From my understanding, I believe that Alex is a very violent man due to a traumatic childhood. He also medicates himself, which isn't great either. As much as I respect Mr. Zim-Quilla, there is no way that he is going to win WAR. He's one to watch though.
Bartender: Um... That wasn't really talking shit about him. That was just you giving a prediction.
John: Well, if you really want me to go all out... "The Archduke of Mass Confusion"... The only thing that confuses me is how you came up with such a pathetic name. You need it to make sense, be slick, like "Jazzy". That's a cool nickname. And that's not the most pathetic thing about him. Ohh no. His self-esteem is pathetic. 'Medicating' himself. After a concussion, I get it, but because you didn't like your former self? The wrestling industry is made up of respect for others. And how can you respect others when you can't even respect yourself? Don't get me wrong, Alex is a cool guy, but after a closer look at him, you realise he's quite pathetic.
Bartender: That's better! Now tell me about Teo Del Sol!
John: Now, I have done some research about Teo leading up to this match... I don't believe I have ever faced him in a one-on-one match, and with his technique, I wouldn't look forward to it. However, I'm fairly confident going up against him in this WAR match, because he has never got an elimination in his life. I'm looking for this trend to continue.
Bartender: Ugh, you're so formal. Loosen up a little bit!
John: No, I'm okay...
But the Bartender had already whipped up a beer. John reluctantly accepted it.
John: Ah... What else? Well, Teo just seems like some guy that keeps on flip-flopping between personalities whenever it doesn't work out for him. Literally, Teddy Blaze couldn't cut it as a wrestler and became Del Sol. Then this thing called the 'Mexico incident' happened, and became Teddy Blaze. And then, yet again, he's back to Teo Del Sol. He just can't make up his mind!
Bartender: What about Stephen Singh?
John: Stephen Singh... I know he's going to do well, Top 5 at least, but there is no way he's going to win. I mean, come on, he's a fucking priest of the Church of Singh. You might as well make your own religion while you're at it. He's a smart boy, don't get me wrong, but surely you have better things to do than make your own church. Actually, he chose to have a wrestling career after excelling at school, so he may not be as smart as people think he is.
John: However, I do have some respect for him. As I said, the wrestling industry thrives from respect, and respect is what I do. Why do I respect him, though? Well, he's a talented wrestler. And he has avoided alcohol. And rumour has it that he got beat up by Daniel Wanderlay and came back to the same gym the next day. I can only say I'm 1 one of those 3 things. So I won't mind if I get eliminated by him. Wait. Church of Singh. Forgot about that. He sucks.
Bartender: Okay, have you heard of El Gran Grande Devorador De Planetas Gigantesco Behemotho and El Ainsley?
John: Um... No. I haven't. But I believe their names loosely translate to 'The Grand Devourer of Planets, Gigantic Behemoth' and 'The Ainsley'. Their names sound familiar, but I don't recall them being in WCF when I was last here. All I know is that they do not stand a chance.
Bartender: Why not?
John: Well... El Behemotho is a 600-pound luchador, and the other guys name is The Ainsley. And they're both luchadors. Name one luchador that has won WAR or anything similar.
Bartender: Rey Mysterio.
John: Shut up. Anyways, they seem dodgy. They claim that they're from Spain City in Spain. And we both know...
Bartender: That...
John: It is a very nasty part of Spain.
Bartender: Yes. It is. Anyways, tell me about Samuel McPherson
John: Samuel McPherson. I vaguely remember that guy. I have never been up against him before, so I'm looking forward to WAR. He's a 6 foot 6 giant, but I feel I can take him down. I reckon his skill is as good as his vocabulary. He's one of those guys that need a manager to speak for him. And he should speak great English, he was born in Nevada! And his excuse is he's autistic? I've known plenty of people with autism that speak fine.
Bartender: Um... John...
John: No. Let me finish. I don't care if I'm crossing any lines. He has no excuse. Why the hell is he even wrestling if he can't speak? It's bullshit.
Bartender: John, tell me about Kylie Moore and Liliana Rose.
John: I remember these girls... I had a fair few fights with them. They were tag matches and I was partnered up with people I had fought last week. Dark times. When I first joined WCF, they were the Lesbian Alliance. Then they became the Darkness Sisters or something. And now, they are the Carnival of Darkness. I mean, what the fuck? They're just as indecisive as Teo Del Sol. And nothing has changed either... They're still posting pics of themselves on Instagram, they're still saying 'You go girl ♥ ♥' to each other on Instagram, all that's changed is they've got two new members, Karma Bishop and Jesus Christ'
Bartender: I believe it's pronounced Jesis Kryst
John: What is the difference? They both suck anyways.
Bartender: Whoa... Okay...
The bartender whips up another beer as John accepts it yet again.
John: Definitely my last one.
Bartender: Now tell me about Ultimate Destroyer.
John: Ultimate Destroyer is actually quite pathetic when you think about it. He's a bulky 7 foot giant that almost resembles the incredible Hulk. He's pure muscle, which is why he is very strong. If his strength was represented by a number, it would be a 100. However, his performance, well... I do not recall him winning any championship. His performance as a number would be around... 32.
Bartender: That means your performance would be a 32 too, because you haven't won any championships.
John: Yes, but my strength is not a 100. It's a 47. You can find out how good a wrestler is by their strength:performance ratio is.
Bartender: Well, you're drunk.
John: Nope. Anyways, Destroyers S:P ratio is 100:32, which is bad. But my S:P ratio is 47:32, this meaning I am better than Ultimate Destroyer.
Bartender: Well... You're drunk. Great.
John <very soberly>: I'm not drunk. What are you talking about?
Bartender: But, you were drunk a moment ago...
John: I guess living in the country leads to a fast metabolism.
Bartender: But...
John: Don't question it.
Bartender: Okay then. Tell me about Eccentrix.
John: Who?
Bartender: Eccentrix.
John: Eccentrix. Sounds like some boy band from the 90s. Or some grocery store exclusive brand. Your pick. I mean, how did he even get that name? Is it his birth name? Anyways, from my understanding, he's some guy that realised how fake his life was and decides to take his anger out on everyone. You know what, I would take him more seriously if his name wasn't fucking Eccentrix!
The Bartender and John both give a little laugh.
John: I'm fairly certain he's coming into WAR hoping to make a statement. Then again, so is everybody else. But with Exxy here, he's not gonna do much. I'm willing to put money on that one.
Bartender: Okay, this guy may be a bit more of a threat... Kurt Navarro
John: Kurt Navarro? I have heard a little bit about this guy. I hear he is holder of 2 infinity stones, which is 2 more than me. But I've also heard he's part of a struggling family detective business. He really shouldn't be wrestling, keeping a family business together and paying a stripper to be ringside.
Bartender: I don't think a stripper is Navarro's manager...
John: Well, I believe that a stripper and a manager of a strip club are the same thing. Anyone who works in a strip club are strippers. True story.
Bartender: Speaking of strippers, tell me about Buff Mustache.
John: Buff Mustache is in WAR? Some people say you love him or hate him, and I love him. I find his sense of humour funny, and the way he manages to find a sexual innuendo out of everything. That's about it though. He can barely wrestle and will barely survive WAR. Only real wrestlers can survive WAR.
Bartender: But you haven't really accomplished much...
John: Hush. That was old me. I shall promise myself to not go back to the ways as old John. This is a new era for me, the return of Jazzy. And I am planning on a strong return.
Bartender: Righty-o then. Can you tell me about Noble Savage?
John: I do not know him, but I have heard that he is favourite to get the most eliminations in war, but there is no way he'll win. I betcha. He sounds kinda psycho though.
Bartender: Um, John, hate to interrupt but Noble Savage isn't a 'he'.
John: ...Noble Savage is a 'she'?
Bartender: Yep. Brandi Savage.
John: Well, Christ. WCF is starting to have a solid Women's Division. Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, she sounds like a psycho. They say she'll probably eliminate 7 people. That's quite a fair bit. And this isn't some over-the-top-rope shit. This is an actual pinfall sorta thing. So, respect.
Bartender: But...?
John: She hasn't eliminated 7 people in WAR. This is all just a prediction. In fact, I think I'll be the one getting 7 eliminations. Now that I've had a break, I'm feeling energised and ready to do this. Back to Noble, she has a nasty split personality. At any moment, her violent personality can suddenly change into her more docile side. You never know with these WCF weirdos.
Bartender: What about Amos?
John: Amos, I don't know too much about him. I did some research as I was curious to see who he was... And it turns out, he is a scam.
Bartender: What?
John: He's an African Prince!
The Bartender and John have a good laugh before continuing the conversation.
John: Anyways, he's an African Prince that hails from Cape Town, and he has not won a single match in WCF yet. He's 0-4. So he should pose no threat in this match. However, if I could tell him one thing, it would be to put more effort in. I'm not sure why, but it seems like Amos is not putting in 100%. Perhaps it's because he's royalty? I don't know, but he needs to put more effort in. But I'm gonna make sure I target him in WAR, and perhaps eliminate him too.
Bartender: Tell me about Night Rider.
John: I do not know who he is. But I do know that this is not his first run in the WCF. He had a run back in 2012. I'm not sure how it affects anything, but he did that.
Bartender: Anything else?
John: Not much. He calls himself the original Angel of Death, which is bullshit, because that would be Hades.
Bartender: Hang on, you believe in Greek Mythology?
John: Somewhat. Oh, I've also heard he rides his motorcycle down to the ring. So he must be some relative to Ghost Rider or he's just blatantly copying one if the most underrated heroes ever. Boom. I said it.
Bartender: Do you know Kennedy Matthews?
John: I don't know him, but...
Bartender: She's a girl too. Not a him.
John: What the hell? Who names their daughter Kennedy?
Bartender: Um... Her parents?
John: Shut up. Don't be a smart-ass. Can you tell me about her? I don't have a clue who she is.
Bartender: Matthews is a spoiled girl with rich parents, pretty much. If she wants it, she will get it. I don't know why she's wrestling though. She might break a nail!
John: Christ, there are some really stupid people here in WCF. Hopefully, I don't have to face these weirdos after WAR. I want to face real wrestlers, like Odin Balfore, Bonnie Blue, even Teo Del Sol. He seems pretty good outside of WAR. I just don't want to get stuck opening shows again.
Bartender: Do you know Estrella Luiz?
John: Nope. Is she one of those ♥ ♥ girls?
Bartender: Yep. She's your classic girl next door. 4 foot 11...
John: 4 foot 11? She's gonna get crushed!
Bartender: Yep.
John: It also seems that Luiz has no skill whatsoever. The day that Estrella Luiz wins WAR is the day that the Mustache Family give up on sex. Other than that, there's not much I can say. Actually, I believe she is undefeated. But she's only beaten Amos. So, she's not that strong.
Bartender: Tell me about Scott Slayer.
John: I have heard a bit about him... I have heard he likes to create chaos, so he should be used to WAR. In fact, he'd be used to this sort of environment. But, once again, rookie. So what if he's dangerous, so what if he was in one of Slam's fastest matches? Those are just newbies. When you go up against the likes of Alex Richards, and even myself, he doesn't stand a chance. He just accepted a challenge from Amos! What I'm saying is that he will be stuck in the lower half of the card for a while.
Bartender: What do you have to say about Jayson Price?
Bartender: There we go! An actual wrestler! He might be part-time, but who cares? Just look at his accomplishments. Enough to make anyone drool. But, alas, Price is getting old. There is no way he can keep up with us younger talent. It's sadly time to let go, Jayson. There is simply no way you can win WAR.
Bartender: Tell me about James Wolf.
John: James Wolf. I remember this guy. I have gone face to face with him before. I believe he's gotten far since I left, and because of this, he's my pick to win WAR, if it's not me of course. I'm glad he's ditched the shopping trolley with weapons, it has made him more mature. Still, I don't have respect for him. He relies on hardcore weapons to win matches and the WCF population hates him. This hate might travel backstage too, perhaps? So, maybe, thinking about him, I might earn respect if I eliminate James Wolf. It won't be easy, but I'm sure I can beat him.
Bartender: Okay, now tell me about you. What have you been doing these past months?
John pondered for a little bit before revealing his story.
John: Well. I was sick of WCF, so I ran. Somewhere in Arkansas. Found a little cabin by a little stream. Nice view. No one seemed to be living there so I made it my own. There was a little town a few miles away. It was only a 2-minute drive there. They had a grocery store, which was good enough. I got groceries there every Friday. The only other thing I got there was a chair, so I could sit on the front porch and look at the view. There was a bed already in the cabin, and that's all I needed.
Bartender: Is that all? Surely you did something else!
John: Ooh yeah. There was a hill a hundred metres away from the cabin. It was a pretty big hill, but I didn't care. Every day, twice if I was feeling good, ran up the hill, 20 push-ups, 20 squats, 20 sit-ups, and a 10-minute plank. And that nearby town, I would usually jog to that town and back. Possibly 3-4 times a week. Who knows?
Bartender: Wow... You must be ripped!
John: Ooh yeah. Well, I'm going now. I need to sleep. Perhaps squeeze in some pre-WAR training.
Bartender: Wait! I still have so... There's other...
But John had alreany left.
Bartender: See ya.
The Bartender then pushed in a few chairs, wiped down the bench and finally turned off the lights before heading out the back door.
---
NOTE:
Sorry it isn't color-coded, it's hard typing up such a long RP on your phone, let alone color-code it. I would also like to apologise if I have offended anyone. Any points of view my character has, doesn't mean I think that OOC too. Yeah, that's about it. Good luck in WAR.
Bartender: Excuse me, sir, but we're closed.
The figure takes off his hood.
Bartender: No way...
John: How's it going?
It turns out that the one and the only 'Jazzy' John McCarty was under the hood, wandering around the streets of New Orleans.
Bartender: Where were you?
John: Not here.
Bartender: And the beard! You grew a beard!
John: It happens when you don't shave.
Bartender: Jeez, it's actually been quite... Um... Un-entertaining without you here.
John: Well, thank you.
Bartender: Come over and sit down at the bar, I'll whip up a beer on the house.
John walks over to the bar as the Bartender quickly walks behind the bar stand.
John: I actually miss this. Been a while since my last drink.
John and the Bartender were alone in the House of Blues, having a friendly conversation.
Bartender: So, tell me what happened. I have so many questions. Why did you stop wrestling? Where did you go? When are you wrestling again?
John: Well... I stopped because I could, I went away, and I'm wrestling at WAR.
Bartender <as he gives some beer to John>: Hmm... You're not as talkative as you used to. Tell me, do you still talk shit about your opponents?
John: I can try.
Bartender: Great! WCF actually just released a list of all the WAR competitors! How come you're not in the list?
John: Uh... Um... Ah...
Bartender: Never mind. Alex Richards. Tell me about him.
John: Alex Richards. He's a cool guy. In fact, I've had a couple glasses of Zim-Quilla myself. Of course, Alex is the guy who created Zim-Quilla.
Bartender: Anything else?
John: That's really all you thought I was gonna say? I still need to talk shit about him.
Bartender: Proceed.
John: From my understanding, I believe that Alex is a very violent man due to a traumatic childhood. He also medicates himself, which isn't great either. As much as I respect Mr. Zim-Quilla, there is no way that he is going to win WAR. He's one to watch though.
Bartender: Um... That wasn't really talking shit about him. That was just you giving a prediction.
John: Well, if you really want me to go all out... "The Archduke of Mass Confusion"... The only thing that confuses me is how you came up with such a pathetic name. You need it to make sense, be slick, like "Jazzy". That's a cool nickname. And that's not the most pathetic thing about him. Ohh no. His self-esteem is pathetic. 'Medicating' himself. After a concussion, I get it, but because you didn't like your former self? The wrestling industry is made up of respect for others. And how can you respect others when you can't even respect yourself? Don't get me wrong, Alex is a cool guy, but after a closer look at him, you realise he's quite pathetic.
Bartender: That's better! Now tell me about Teo Del Sol!
John: Now, I have done some research about Teo leading up to this match... I don't believe I have ever faced him in a one-on-one match, and with his technique, I wouldn't look forward to it. However, I'm fairly confident going up against him in this WAR match, because he has never got an elimination in his life. I'm looking for this trend to continue.
Bartender: Ugh, you're so formal. Loosen up a little bit!
John: No, I'm okay...
But the Bartender had already whipped up a beer. John reluctantly accepted it.
John: Ah... What else? Well, Teo just seems like some guy that keeps on flip-flopping between personalities whenever it doesn't work out for him. Literally, Teddy Blaze couldn't cut it as a wrestler and became Del Sol. Then this thing called the 'Mexico incident' happened, and became Teddy Blaze. And then, yet again, he's back to Teo Del Sol. He just can't make up his mind!
Bartender: What about Stephen Singh?
John: Stephen Singh... I know he's going to do well, Top 5 at least, but there is no way he's going to win. I mean, come on, he's a fucking priest of the Church of Singh. You might as well make your own religion while you're at it. He's a smart boy, don't get me wrong, but surely you have better things to do than make your own church. Actually, he chose to have a wrestling career after excelling at school, so he may not be as smart as people think he is.
John: However, I do have some respect for him. As I said, the wrestling industry thrives from respect, and respect is what I do. Why do I respect him, though? Well, he's a talented wrestler. And he has avoided alcohol. And rumour has it that he got beat up by Daniel Wanderlay and came back to the same gym the next day. I can only say I'm 1 one of those 3 things. So I won't mind if I get eliminated by him. Wait. Church of Singh. Forgot about that. He sucks.
Bartender: Okay, have you heard of El Gran Grande Devorador De Planetas Gigantesco Behemotho and El Ainsley?
John: Um... No. I haven't. But I believe their names loosely translate to 'The Grand Devourer of Planets, Gigantic Behemoth' and 'The Ainsley'. Their names sound familiar, but I don't recall them being in WCF when I was last here. All I know is that they do not stand a chance.
Bartender: Why not?
John: Well... El Behemotho is a 600-pound luchador, and the other guys name is The Ainsley. And they're both luchadors. Name one luchador that has won WAR or anything similar.
Bartender: Rey Mysterio.
John: Shut up. Anyways, they seem dodgy. They claim that they're from Spain City in Spain. And we both know...
Bartender: That...
John: It is a very nasty part of Spain.
Bartender: Yes. It is. Anyways, tell me about Samuel McPherson
John: Samuel McPherson. I vaguely remember that guy. I have never been up against him before, so I'm looking forward to WAR. He's a 6 foot 6 giant, but I feel I can take him down. I reckon his skill is as good as his vocabulary. He's one of those guys that need a manager to speak for him. And he should speak great English, he was born in Nevada! And his excuse is he's autistic? I've known plenty of people with autism that speak fine.
Bartender: Um... John...
John: No. Let me finish. I don't care if I'm crossing any lines. He has no excuse. Why the hell is he even wrestling if he can't speak? It's bullshit.
Bartender: John, tell me about Kylie Moore and Liliana Rose.
John: I remember these girls... I had a fair few fights with them. They were tag matches and I was partnered up with people I had fought last week. Dark times. When I first joined WCF, they were the Lesbian Alliance. Then they became the Darkness Sisters or something. And now, they are the Carnival of Darkness. I mean, what the fuck? They're just as indecisive as Teo Del Sol. And nothing has changed either... They're still posting pics of themselves on Instagram, they're still saying 'You go girl ♥ ♥' to each other on Instagram, all that's changed is they've got two new members, Karma Bishop and Jesus Christ'
Bartender: I believe it's pronounced Jesis Kryst
John: What is the difference? They both suck anyways.
Bartender: Whoa... Okay...
The bartender whips up another beer as John accepts it yet again.
John: Definitely my last one.
Bartender: Now tell me about Ultimate Destroyer.
John: Ultimate Destroyer is actually quite pathetic when you think about it. He's a bulky 7 foot giant that almost resembles the incredible Hulk. He's pure muscle, which is why he is very strong. If his strength was represented by a number, it would be a 100. However, his performance, well... I do not recall him winning any championship. His performance as a number would be around... 32.
Bartender: That means your performance would be a 32 too, because you haven't won any championships.
John: Yes, but my strength is not a 100. It's a 47. You can find out how good a wrestler is by their strength:performance ratio is.
Bartender: Well, you're drunk.
John: Nope. Anyways, Destroyers S:P ratio is 100:32, which is bad. But my S:P ratio is 47:32, this meaning I am better than Ultimate Destroyer.
Bartender: Well... You're drunk. Great.
John <very soberly>: I'm not drunk. What are you talking about?
Bartender: But, you were drunk a moment ago...
John: I guess living in the country leads to a fast metabolism.
Bartender: But...
John: Don't question it.
Bartender: Okay then. Tell me about Eccentrix.
John: Who?
Bartender: Eccentrix.
John: Eccentrix. Sounds like some boy band from the 90s. Or some grocery store exclusive brand. Your pick. I mean, how did he even get that name? Is it his birth name? Anyways, from my understanding, he's some guy that realised how fake his life was and decides to take his anger out on everyone. You know what, I would take him more seriously if his name wasn't fucking Eccentrix!
The Bartender and John both give a little laugh.
John: I'm fairly certain he's coming into WAR hoping to make a statement. Then again, so is everybody else. But with Exxy here, he's not gonna do much. I'm willing to put money on that one.
Bartender: Okay, this guy may be a bit more of a threat... Kurt Navarro
John: Kurt Navarro? I have heard a little bit about this guy. I hear he is holder of 2 infinity stones, which is 2 more than me. But I've also heard he's part of a struggling family detective business. He really shouldn't be wrestling, keeping a family business together and paying a stripper to be ringside.
Bartender: I don't think a stripper is Navarro's manager...
John: Well, I believe that a stripper and a manager of a strip club are the same thing. Anyone who works in a strip club are strippers. True story.
Bartender: Speaking of strippers, tell me about Buff Mustache.
John: Buff Mustache is in WAR? Some people say you love him or hate him, and I love him. I find his sense of humour funny, and the way he manages to find a sexual innuendo out of everything. That's about it though. He can barely wrestle and will barely survive WAR. Only real wrestlers can survive WAR.
Bartender: But you haven't really accomplished much...
John: Hush. That was old me. I shall promise myself to not go back to the ways as old John. This is a new era for me, the return of Jazzy. And I am planning on a strong return.
Bartender: Righty-o then. Can you tell me about Noble Savage?
John: I do not know him, but I have heard that he is favourite to get the most eliminations in war, but there is no way he'll win. I betcha. He sounds kinda psycho though.
Bartender: Um, John, hate to interrupt but Noble Savage isn't a 'he'.
John: ...Noble Savage is a 'she'?
Bartender: Yep. Brandi Savage.
John: Well, Christ. WCF is starting to have a solid Women's Division. Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, she sounds like a psycho. They say she'll probably eliminate 7 people. That's quite a fair bit. And this isn't some over-the-top-rope shit. This is an actual pinfall sorta thing. So, respect.
Bartender: But...?
John: She hasn't eliminated 7 people in WAR. This is all just a prediction. In fact, I think I'll be the one getting 7 eliminations. Now that I've had a break, I'm feeling energised and ready to do this. Back to Noble, she has a nasty split personality. At any moment, her violent personality can suddenly change into her more docile side. You never know with these WCF weirdos.
Bartender: What about Amos?
John: Amos, I don't know too much about him. I did some research as I was curious to see who he was... And it turns out, he is a scam.
Bartender: What?
John: He's an African Prince!
The Bartender and John have a good laugh before continuing the conversation.
John: Anyways, he's an African Prince that hails from Cape Town, and he has not won a single match in WCF yet. He's 0-4. So he should pose no threat in this match. However, if I could tell him one thing, it would be to put more effort in. I'm not sure why, but it seems like Amos is not putting in 100%. Perhaps it's because he's royalty? I don't know, but he needs to put more effort in. But I'm gonna make sure I target him in WAR, and perhaps eliminate him too.
Bartender: Tell me about Night Rider.
John: I do not know who he is. But I do know that this is not his first run in the WCF. He had a run back in 2012. I'm not sure how it affects anything, but he did that.
Bartender: Anything else?
John: Not much. He calls himself the original Angel of Death, which is bullshit, because that would be Hades.
Bartender: Hang on, you believe in Greek Mythology?
John: Somewhat. Oh, I've also heard he rides his motorcycle down to the ring. So he must be some relative to Ghost Rider or he's just blatantly copying one if the most underrated heroes ever. Boom. I said it.
Bartender: Do you know Kennedy Matthews?
John: I don't know him, but...
Bartender: She's a girl too. Not a him.
John: What the hell? Who names their daughter Kennedy?
Bartender: Um... Her parents?
John: Shut up. Don't be a smart-ass. Can you tell me about her? I don't have a clue who she is.
Bartender: Matthews is a spoiled girl with rich parents, pretty much. If she wants it, she will get it. I don't know why she's wrestling though. She might break a nail!
John: Christ, there are some really stupid people here in WCF. Hopefully, I don't have to face these weirdos after WAR. I want to face real wrestlers, like Odin Balfore, Bonnie Blue, even Teo Del Sol. He seems pretty good outside of WAR. I just don't want to get stuck opening shows again.
Bartender: Do you know Estrella Luiz?
John: Nope. Is she one of those ♥ ♥ girls?
Bartender: Yep. She's your classic girl next door. 4 foot 11...
John: 4 foot 11? She's gonna get crushed!
Bartender: Yep.
John: It also seems that Luiz has no skill whatsoever. The day that Estrella Luiz wins WAR is the day that the Mustache Family give up on sex. Other than that, there's not much I can say. Actually, I believe she is undefeated. But she's only beaten Amos. So, she's not that strong.
Bartender: Tell me about Scott Slayer.
John: I have heard a bit about him... I have heard he likes to create chaos, so he should be used to WAR. In fact, he'd be used to this sort of environment. But, once again, rookie. So what if he's dangerous, so what if he was in one of Slam's fastest matches? Those are just newbies. When you go up against the likes of Alex Richards, and even myself, he doesn't stand a chance. He just accepted a challenge from Amos! What I'm saying is that he will be stuck in the lower half of the card for a while.
Bartender: What do you have to say about Jayson Price?
Bartender: There we go! An actual wrestler! He might be part-time, but who cares? Just look at his accomplishments. Enough to make anyone drool. But, alas, Price is getting old. There is no way he can keep up with us younger talent. It's sadly time to let go, Jayson. There is simply no way you can win WAR.
Bartender: Tell me about James Wolf.
John: James Wolf. I remember this guy. I have gone face to face with him before. I believe he's gotten far since I left, and because of this, he's my pick to win WAR, if it's not me of course. I'm glad he's ditched the shopping trolley with weapons, it has made him more mature. Still, I don't have respect for him. He relies on hardcore weapons to win matches and the WCF population hates him. This hate might travel backstage too, perhaps? So, maybe, thinking about him, I might earn respect if I eliminate James Wolf. It won't be easy, but I'm sure I can beat him.
Bartender: Okay, now tell me about you. What have you been doing these past months?
John pondered for a little bit before revealing his story.
John: Well. I was sick of WCF, so I ran. Somewhere in Arkansas. Found a little cabin by a little stream. Nice view. No one seemed to be living there so I made it my own. There was a little town a few miles away. It was only a 2-minute drive there. They had a grocery store, which was good enough. I got groceries there every Friday. The only other thing I got there was a chair, so I could sit on the front porch and look at the view. There was a bed already in the cabin, and that's all I needed.
Bartender: Is that all? Surely you did something else!
John: Ooh yeah. There was a hill a hundred metres away from the cabin. It was a pretty big hill, but I didn't care. Every day, twice if I was feeling good, ran up the hill, 20 push-ups, 20 squats, 20 sit-ups, and a 10-minute plank. And that nearby town, I would usually jog to that town and back. Possibly 3-4 times a week. Who knows?
Bartender: Wow... You must be ripped!
John: Ooh yeah. Well, I'm going now. I need to sleep. Perhaps squeeze in some pre-WAR training.
Bartender: Wait! I still have so... There's other...
But John had alreany left.
Bartender: See ya.
The Bartender then pushed in a few chairs, wiped down the bench and finally turned off the lights before heading out the back door.
---
NOTE:
Sorry it isn't color-coded, it's hard typing up such a long RP on your phone, let alone color-code it. I would also like to apologise if I have offended anyone. Any points of view my character has, doesn't mean I think that OOC too. Yeah, that's about it. Good luck in WAR.
