Episode AQUARIUS

[FPV]

KOTDM NIGHT 1: Episode AQUARIUS

Seth made the announcement on Slam, and the press barely had any time to react. The news that I would be participating in the second annual King of The Deathmatch Tournament after almost two months on hiatus definitely generated some buzz. Along with fellow veterans Wade Moor and Crow McMorris, it's easy to see myself as one of the star attractions of this whole tournament. That's an expectation my fans have of me, and quite frankly (pun possibly intended) it was time for me to stop disappointing them.

As one would expect, getting an interview with me on such short notice for the first night of action was almost impossible. I must've had dozens of different blogs and magazines reach out to me. But anyone who knows me knows that there is only one man I'd let interview me for such an occasion.

Hank Brown sauntered into my hotel room in the wee hours of the morning. I had just arrived there myself, and was beginning to finally get settled when he arrived. I greeted my friend with a firm handshake that turned into a warm hug.

Hank Brown: Good to see you back Frank. Where've you been these past few months?

FPV: Oh you know, getting my head back on straight and such. The usual.

He looked at me weirdly. Clearly he could sense I was dodging his question.

Hank Brown: Frank, c'mon now, don't try to be sneaky with me. You should know better then that.

FPV: I'm not playin Hank. Went and took a couple trips around the country. New York, Denver, Seattle, places like that.

Right after I said that I realized I probably shouldn't have mentioned Seattle. I had meant to keep that part a secret, because Hank would probably know about my connections over there. About the D'arby boys and their various attempts on my life, their mother, and of course...Peter Quinn. I was hoping Hank wouldn't bring that man up, he was the type of hard boiled investigator who would ask such a question. Thankfully he seemed to move on from it, perhaps pressed for time, perhaps in respect to my friendship with him. Either way he said...

Hank Brown: Well gimme a sec to get this camera set up and we'll roll. I'll try not to spend too much of your time.

...and went right to work doing just that. The man got that shit set up by himself within a minute, his years of experience were beginning to show. After checking the camera's settings were all good, he sat down beside me on my freshly made bed and began the interview.

Hank Brown: Hello WCF Galaxy, Hank Brown here with a WCF.com EXCLUSIVE interview. Seth did not lie, the man is right here in front of me, Frank Patrick Venable has returned to participate in the George A. Romero King of the Deathmatch tournament! First off, it's great to have you back Frank, how did you enjoy your little hiatus.

FPV: It was good, got a chance to put everything aside for a brief moment, focus on myself, recharge my batteries and all that. I'm pumped, I'm ready to go, and I cannot WAIT to get into that ring.

Hank Brown: Excellent! Now while Seth has not announced any tangible prizes other then the Corey Black match for the winner, is there anything you'd like to win in this tournament?

FPV: Honestly? No. To me, Corey Black IS my goal. If I get like a World title shot out of this, then awesome! But that's not my main focus. I had a match against Corey Black earlier this year under the pretense it would be my last chance to ever prove myself to him, and I came up short. As soon as that match ended I thought to myself "Welp, so much for that goal. Guess I'll just have to live with this forever." This tournament? This is my REDEMPTION. Win the block. Win the finals. Beat Corey Black. I do all of that, I'm a happy camper.

Hank Brown: I see. And lastly, tonight you have your first match up against Andre Aquarius in an AQUA MATCH. Your thoughts?

FPV: Well my main thought is that I'm sad they couldn't get the ACTUAL Hardcore Andre to put against me, that match would actually be a challenge compared to this A$AP Mob reject. Dude is a FOUNDING MEMBER of #beachkrewe. FOUNDING. MEMBER. And yet no one gives a shit about him. Wade Moor and Jared Holmes got themselves that World title, the closest Aquarius ever got to a title was when he went for Torture's Hardcore title in WAR and failed. Dude was the ONLY ONE actively trying to win that title and he failed HARD. And I got people saying I've got "the king of fartcore" to deal with in night one? Please, gimme a fuckin' break.

Let's not forget his whole fucked up dynamic with the other Andre. You know, the competent one? He blindsided him outta nowhere sayin' he was coming for that hardcore title, made a big stink about it, drove Holmes nuts...then just said "Haha you fools! I was in cahoots with Holmes all along! #fuccbooois!" All of that build up...for that.

The actual fuck, my dude?

So not only did you waste all of our time hyping us up for a match that never happened, but afterwards you felt perfectly fine letting Andre have all of the glory being hardcore champ? Some fucking hardcore competitor you are.

Aquarius, I'm gonna walk into Panama City Beach and fuck you up so bad I'm gonna have the NAACP on me. By the time I'm done filling your lungs with salty sea water I'm gonna have Rev. Al Sharpton lookin' for my head. You ever felt that panic, Aquarius? That feeling of helplessness as you flail around trying to get just a LITTLE BIT of oxygen into your body? Cause if not, you're gonna be in for the lesson of a lifetime tonight my boi. You better hope that referee knows some goddamn CPR.

That's all I have to say to him. I'll see you tonight, Hank.

Hank shut the camera off, said his goodbyes, and made a quick exit. I quickly glanced over to my plane ticket, still showing my arrival from Seattle, and made a mental note never to show this to anyone. At least for now.