Post by jasoncash on Oct 22, 2016 18:27:32 GMT -5
And that was that. Pantheon had won this battle after Joey Flash pinned Adrian Archer. It was a hard fought battle, neither side willing to give up. The deciding factor? Numbers. pantheon simply has the numbers. It was yet another run in by Jared Holmes, the six god, that would cost the match. He'd already cost Gemini Battle his title. This after he saved his Pantheon teammates at War. When would this end? When would they be put in their place? Only time could tell. Pantheon was dominant in the numbers game and it showed. There was a glimmer of hope, however. They needed those numbers to win. They needed outside interference to get by. They wouldn't always have that.....
Jason Cash stumbled backstage. No, it wasn't due to alcohol. Jason drank constantly, but it didn't affect him quite as much as most would assume. The truth was that he simply didnt know. He'd felt weak. He'd seen double. His body felt like it was fighting him tooth and nail just to stay conscious. It been that way for hours. To put it truthfully, the man known as the hillbilly hero simply should never have fought. But you can't tell Jason these things. The man was tough as nails. He would never listen anyway. He'd fought as hard as he could. He'd hit the rebel yell on Joey flash, rendering the WCF legend incapacitated...Needing to be saved via his teammates. He'd attacked the ringside Pantheon members head on. But what was wrong?
Jason was being led to the Zero Tolerance locker room by Crazy J and Adrian Archer. Each had an arm around the big man, who could barely move his own feet. "Stop! I gotta sumbitchin puke.", Jason yelled just as they got to the door. His ZT brother leaned him up against the wall and watched as our hillbilly hero puked his guts out. J looked down. Normally, he would have something insane to say. After all, J was about five beers short of a six pack. But what he saw on that floor brought a sense of clarity. This wasn't half digested food and liquid ion the floor. No. This was blood. J looked at it wide eyed. A worried look crossed his face as Jason just kept puking and puking. "We have to get him to a hospital!", said Archer. "My ass is fine, At. I just need a beer.", Jason weakly answered, blood dripping from his mouth. Archer shook his head. "Nah man. You need a doctor. You're puking up blood." Archer said, obviously worried about his new friend. Jason meekly shook his head. "My ass ain't goin ta no doctor.", Jason answered. "My ass just damn it needs a sumbitchin beer!", Jason added. His vision blurred. His vision blinked. His vision blacked out.
Light. Intense, white light flooded Jason Cash's eyes as he slowly opened them. Pain shot through those eyes, causing him to try and blink the pain away. It didn't work, however. The pain shot through his eye sockets like bullets and came to a stop in his head. He tried to tough his face, but he felt his arms tied down. He looked to his left. He looked to his right. Straps. His arms were strapped down. He looked down as much as he could. He was make. His heart started beating so fast that he thought it would leave or explode in his chest. He looked around. He was in a hospital bed, the constant beeping of the heart monitor let him know that he was still alive.
The room was all white. There was the usual equipment there above him. There was the heart monitor. There was the oxygen monitor. There was an IV going into his arm. Jason's jaw dropped when he saw what was going through the IV. Instead of the usual clear liquid, this was black and thick looking. His heart started beating faster. He looked around the white room. No sunlight came through the curtained window. And the room was cold. Jason had never been so cold before. Maybe it was due to the fact that he was naked.
The door opened with a creak. Jason's eyes grew wide. He'd been alone this whole time, who could this be? A man walked through the door. He was a large man. His face was painted white with black accents around the eyes. He had a short Mohawk that was died blood red. He wore hot pink scrubs and a white doctors jacket.
"Crazy J?"
The man cocked his head to the side. "Crazy J? Who is Crazy J?", the doctor asked. Jason tried to grin but the pain was too much. "Yer ass is J. Dont damn it fuck wit me.", Jason replied. The doctor chuckeled out loud. It was a creepy sound. It sounded like skin crawling. "Im not Crazy J, Jason. Im Dr. Boneherhard.", The good doctor .answered. Jason, again, tried to laugh, but pain shot through his body. "Calm down, Jason. You're in no shape to be doing any of that.", Dr. Boneherhard said flatly. "Sumbitch.", Jason started as he tried to get loose. "J! Gotdamn it. Let my ass up!", Jason finished. The good doctor, again, cocked his head to the side. "I told you. Im not J.", Dr. Boneherhard said as he looked at his notes. He then frowned. "It's gone to your head already. This is not good news.", Dr. Boneherhard said worriedly. Jasons eyes grew wide. "What's gone to my sumbitchin head?", Jason asked. Dr Bonherhard scratched his head as if he'd thought his patient knew what he had. Then he shrugged his shoulders. "Why you have Likith ghonnashyphilaids. And a bad case of it.", Dr. Boneherhard told our hillbilly hero. "Gonna sypha what?", Cash asked. The doctor grinned. "Ghonnasyphilaids...Lilith's ghonnasyphilaids to be exact. This means that an acid like disease is eating your insides much like the acid that comes from Lilith's snatch.", Dr. Boneherhard said flatly. Jason, again, tried to get loose.
"Tell me, Mr. Cash...Have you gone down on Lilith any time this year?"
"Shit naw. I wouldn't touch that bitch with yer dick.", Jason answered. Dr. Boneherhard chuckled. "Yea I didn't ask you that. Have you touched her snatch with your mouth?", Dr. Boneherhard asked our hero. Jason felt sick, which only made his pain worse. "Shit naw.", Jason answered. Dr. Boneherhard wrote the answers down on his paper. "Well..You may have gotten it rectally.", the good doctor said with a smile. Jason furrowed his eye brows. "Rectally? The hell does that mean?", Jason asked. Dr Boneherhard smiled a big smile, showing his popcorn butter colored teeth. "Why up the ass of course. And there is only one way to find out.", Dr. Boneherhard said with glee. He walked over to the far corner, reached into a drawer and pulled out a serrated, foot long peice of metal. Jason cringe as the doctor began to walk over to him.
"Noooooooo!"
Light. Intense, bright white light flooded Jasons eyes when he tried to open them. Pain shot through him from his eyeballs to the back of his head. It was wearing pain. His body felt like he'd been hit by a truck. He was pale. He felt weak. He looked down. Blue hospital gown. He looked around. All the usual equipment was there. There was an IV going through to his right arm. The liquid going through it was clear. Our hillbilly hero thought to himself, "what in the shit is goin on?". He heard a toilet flush. The door opened. Erik's wife, Nicole, walked..No..waddled into the room. She wore jjeans and a maternity shirt. It was blue with gold trim. She was about eight months pregnant after all. Her blue eyes lit up when she saw Jason awake. "Babe!", she said excitedly. Jason smiled. "I've been waiting for you to wake up for hours.", she said. Jason scratched his head. "I just took a little nap a little bit ago.", Jason replied. Nicole shook her head. "Babe, you've been in a coma for an entire day.", she said. Jasons heart began to beat faster. That explained the weird dream. He was hoping that he really didnt have rectal ghonnasyphilaids. "Dr Boneherhard around?", Jason asked. Nicole stared at him. "Dr who?", she asked. Jason looked at her for a moment. "Tknow. Dr. Boneherhard. Sumbitch told me I had ghonnasyphilaids. Said he was gone shove somethin up my ass to diagnose.", Jason answered. This made his wife laugh a bit. She always did find something funny in serious situations. "Jason, your doctors name if Fuchs.", she told him. "So I don't have rectal ghonnasyphilaids?", he said letting out a sigh of relief. "Where the fellas?", he asked. "Erik sent them away in business. He wanted to be here himself, but got an urgent call and had to leave.", she told him. Jason nodded his head. He understood everything. It was all business after all.
There was a knock on the door. Nicole got off of the bed as she'd been sitting on it. The door opened and in walked a rather short lady. She was about as wide as she was tall, which was about five feet. The first thought through Jason's mind was "This cant be a midget stripper". And it wasn’t. "I'm Dr Reynolds. I’m glad you're awake. We didn’t think you'd be awake for a while", The doctor said. Jason didnt know whether he should be happy and smile, or worried and frown, so he did the only thing he knew to do. He stared blankly at her until she looked at the chart. "We believe you were poisoned.", She said. Nicole gasped. Jason stared blankly. "We're not sure what was in it. We do know that rat poison was in there, was was rufelin.", The doctor said with a straight voice. Jason couldn’t hold it. He started laughing. "Somebody damn it rufied my ass?!", he yelled. Nicole shook her head. The doctor, who didnt really know Jason Cash simply nodded. "Sort of. Do you have any enemies, Jason?", She asked. Jason grinned from ear to ear. "Enemies? Well...Them Panteen sumbitches dont like my ass too much, but I don’t damn it thank they'd poison my ass.", Jason told her. Dr. Reynolds nodded. "We'll take some more blood. You'll be good to go home after. It seems like the effects have worn off", She said. Jason gulped. If there was one thing in this world Jason Cash hated..It was needles.
...The next evening....
The sun had gone down on Detroit, Michigan. It had been a rainy day for those in Detroit after storm after storm had moved through the area with high winds and hail. It was something that the Detroit area very rarely saw, so most people decided to raid the super markets and grocery stores for supplies. That mean that there wasn’t anyone on the streets as Erik Black stared out of his window. He was lost in thought. Who could have poisoned Jason? Darkness? Someone else? Someone from Pantheon? They were the type to do that sort of thing..Anything to get a win, yknow? But would they? They thought themselves superior anyway? Then again, they did always need Jared Holmes to interfere to win.
"Mr. Black. He's here"
The two double doors that led into Erik Black's office swung open at the touch of a button. In walked Jason Cash. He looked tired... Dead tired. His skin was pale. He walked with a limp. He looked like the walking dead. Maybe the poison was still in his system. Maybe he was just tired from the flight. He and Nicole had gotten on the soonest flight to make it back so quickly. He walked straight for the mini fridge and got himself a beer. He took a long drink. Erik waited, eyes looking over at Jason as if he were studying our hillbilly hero. "How do you feel?", Erik asked when Jason reached in for a second beer. Jason shrugged and took another long drink. "Fine I reckon. Sumbitchin doctor said I got ruffied.", Jason told Erik. Black rubbed his chin, thinking. "Think them Panteen sumbitches did it? They do any damn thang ta get that win.", Jason asked. Erik shook his head. "No. I think it was some one else.", Erik said. Jason thought for a minute as well. Erik broke the silence. "I believe it was darkness.", Erik said. Jason's jaw dropped. "YOu think he was in hawaii?", Jason asked. Erik nodded. "We never found a body and I thought he was dead years ago. I wouldn’t put it past him", Erik said as calm as he could. Deep inside the man was burning. He wanted to feel Darkness' heart stop with his own hands...again. Jason did as well. If Darkness was behind this, he nearly killed Jason. He couldn’t imagine what would happen to his family with him gone. He did have another child on the way after all. "We have to find him before this gets worse.", Erik said. He walked over to his desk and pressed his intercom button. "Jennifer. Get me Rex. Send him straight in when he gets here.", Erik said.
Jason sat down on the white leather couch. If was one of the most comfortable couches he'd ever put his ass on. He nearly feel asleep, but remembered that he had beer to drink. It'd been nearly two days since he'd had one. Part of him said to take it slow...But the part that didn’t give a shit took over. He'd just finished his third beer when the doors opened. In walked Rex Butler. Rex was once an in ring competitor with Zero Tolerance. He was a big man. He stood about six foot ten. He weight about three hundred pounds. His head was shaved and he had the eyes of a killer. He wore simple jeans and a blood stained grey shirt. He and Jason had retired the Global WRestling Alliance Tag Team Titles when the place closed years ago. They ewre undefeated. Erik Black had even feuded with Rex in AWA a year or two before Gemini Battle arrived there. Erik always said that there were two people on this earth that he would consider his toughest matchups. ONe was REx. The other was Jaymz. Jaosn and Rex were a strange, but very capable and dangerous team. ONe could think of them as the odd couple. Rex was always very serious. He wasnt one to joke around. He had a very quick temper. Jason hasn’t changed one bit. He's still the beer swilling country boy he'd always been.
It had been years since Jason and Rex had seen each other. Jason jumped off the couch with a huge smile across his face. This was a smile so wide that his chew nearly fell out of his mouth. REx saw the hug coming and rolled his eyes. "Big Ugly!", Jason yelled as he hugged Rex. "Jason Cash.", Rex said, trying to his his annoyance. Jason didn’t notice the tone. He did have that habit of not really getting what was going on around him. Rex tolerated him. Jaymz hated him. And Cash was none the wiser. "How the hell ya been, big ugly?", Jason asked. Rex shrugged his shoulders. "You know...Just killin.", Rex said. Jason's eyes grew wide. "Boy yer ass aint damn it changed a bit!", Jason said. Erik cleared his throat. Jason looked at his with a cocked eybrow. "Get that mess outa yer throat?", He asked. Erik put his head down and rubbed his temples. "Rex. Where did you track Darkness to?", Erik asked. Rex Butler stopped to think. "Well. I didn’t see any tracks on the road near Bloomfield Hills. I got some security footage that would place him near the airport.", Rex said. Erik's icy blue eyes glimmered with recognition. "When?", Erik asked. "Saturday morning", Rex answered. Erik thought for a moment.
Meanwhile, Jason was still in awe of seeing Rex again. It had been over seven years since he'd seen REx last. Hell Jason was barely over drinking age while they were dominating. "Do you think he could have gone to Hawaii?", Erik asked. Rex looked at Jason, who was getting himself another chew, out of the corner of his eyes. Erik nodded. Rex slowly nodded. "I do.", He added. Erik had thought as much. Darkness had taken a step away from simple stalking and taken a step toward murder. He needed to be stopped. He needed Jaymz. Erik walked back behind his desk. Rex sat beside the wide eyed Jason Cash.
Scene began to fade.
..........
Thwak! Buzzzz!
The camera slowly zoomed put from the WCF News logo that sat at the center of the news desk. It panned up to the wide grin of Jigaboo Jerome, who was the only one sitting at the desk. His wide grin showed off a bit of the chew he had in his lip.
Jerome: Hello and welcome to a WCF News Special Report. Im Jigaboo Jerome.
He turned slightly to hulis right and began to straighten some papers.
Jerome: For years Zombie McMorris terrorized the hardcore and internet division. He'd held those title many times. His snarky comments on twitter garnered him quite a bit of fame. But lately, he's been facing loss after loss. He's been pinned ny Zero Tolerance three times now in the three times he's been in the ring with them. He's become known as Crazy Js bitch. Has he lost his luster? Has he lost that IT factor? I sent Big Dick Daryll out to find the answer.
Thwak! Buzzzz!
Big Dick Daryll walked through a Detroit shopping mall, microphone in hand. He found a rather old, well dressed man with greying hair. Big Dick quickly stopped the man.
Big Dick: Excuse me sir. Can I ask you a few questions?
The old man stopped and nodded. Big Dick put his right arm around the mans shoulders, nearly swallowing the smaller man.
Big Dick: What is your name, sir?
Man: Alex.
Big Dick smiled.
Big Dick: Nice to meet you, Alex. Tell me. Are you a WCF fan?
Alex: You bet your big ass I am.
Big Dick nodded.
Big Dick: So I assume you know Zombie McMorris. Tell me, Alex. Is he a WCF legendary champion? Or is he simply ZTs bitch?
Alex: ZTs bitch!
Well that was quick? But why did he think Zombie was simply ZTs bitch?
Big Dick: Why do you think this, Alex? ZMac has held a few championships. He might be the greatest ainternet Champ of all time.
Alex: Well..When you have three straight losses against what basically amounts to half a stable..You kind of become their bitch.
Again, Big Dick nodded.
Big Dick: So its safe to assume that Jason Cash will pin him to win the four way match at slam?
Alex nodded.
Alex: Jason Cash is my favorite .wrestler! I love that guy! His accent is sexy.
And Big Dick Daryll nearly fell over with a gut busting laugh.
Big Dick: Thank you, Alex.
Alex: I'd like to get me some of that.
Big Dick walked away as quickly as he could, laughing till he cried. He walked a bit more. He was approached by a skinny blonde kid. The young man wore skinny jeans, converse shoes and a tattered ZMac shirt. His teeth were damn near black and acne covered his face.
Kid: Big Dick Daryll!
Big Dick looked at the kid, but decided against it. He basically ignored the kid. But the kid yelled again. Big Dick stopped and looked at him.
Big Dick: So you wanna be on tv? What's your name?
Kid: Bobby.
Big Dick: So Bobby. We're here today to find out what the people think about Zombie McMorris. Is he a legendary WCF champion? Or ZTs bitch?
Bobby: Oh he's legendary! Zmac is the fucking man and he's gonna beat the shit put of Jason Cash at Slam.
Big Dick nodded, waiting for Bobby to finish.
Big Dick: Care to expand on that?
Bobby: fuck yea! Nobody in ZT cant hang with Zmac! Crazy J and Salem Shepard got fucking lucky!
It was about that time when Big Dick Daryll kicked poor Bobby directly in the face. What teeth this guy had flew out of his mouth. He fell in a heap.
The scene faded.
The camera zoomed away from the WCF News logo, showing Jigaboo Jerome. He shuffled some papers and turned slightly to his right.
Jerome: Wow. That was some amazing reporting by Big Dick Daryll. It seems like our question was answered. ZOmbie McMorris is nothing more than ZTs bitch. The people have spoken. Wait...
Jerome put his hand to his ear.
Jerome: Im getting word that not everyone thinks ZMac is ZTs bitch. Well fuck you guys. You're all wrong ZMac is ZTs bitch. He will always be ZTs bitch until the day he dies..and since he's imortal....that means he'll be ZTs bitch forever!
Jerome straightened hat hat.
Jerome: This has been a WCF News Special Report. Im Jigaboo Jerome...Signing off.
Thawk! Buzzz!
Jason Cash turned off the tv. He'd been sitting on a tattered, once hello but now brown couch. He threw the remote to his right and too a drink from his beer bottle. "That's a damn good news show them guys put on.", he said. There was laughter to his right. It was his wife, Nicole. She sat in a black leather recliner. Truthfully, it was the nicest thing in the trailer. That's right, they had a huge home, but still mainly lived in that beat the fuck up old trailer. "You're kidding, right?", she said. Jason turned his head quickly to look at her. "The hell you talkin bout, woman?", pur hillbilly hero asked. "Nothing, but you said THEY.", she answered. Jason looked at her with his eyebrow cocked. "Yea..THEY put on a damn good show. My favorite is that Jerome feller", Jason said with a wide grin. Nicole got up, walked over to Jason, and tapped him right in the balls. Jason doubled over. "Shouldn’t you be resting? You have a match...Which for some reason you agreed to.", She said. Jason, who was in quite a bit of pain from the ball slap weakly replied, "You thank I'm weak? Hell I could beat Blaze, ZMac n cheese and whoever the hell Danny Anderson is if I was crippled.". Nicole rolled her eyes. "You almost died this week. You shouldnt be wrestling.", She said. Jason laughed as much as he could. "I don’t damn it rassle. My as fiights. You wont see my ass doin them booty holds...or them sumbitchin flipity dos. My ass don’t do that mess. I just go in that sumbitch and put boots ta asses.", He said. She rolled her eyes again. "Well, whatever you want to call it...You shouldn’t be doing it.", She replied. Jason shook his head. She'd never really understand why Jason did what he did. He did it for her and his kids. But..You know...women. She walked away and left Jason sitting there on that yellow, but now brown couch.
The Tv, which was a smart TV, buzzed to life. Jason scratched his head. He'd never seen that happen before and really had no idea it was even possible. His jaw dropped and his dip fell out of his lip when he saw what was on it. He sat there watching Darkness enter the locker room. Darkness took out a vial and emptied the contents into an open beer bottle. Laughter echoed through the hall. Darkness heard. Darkness quickly left. He didn’t bother mixing the contents. I guess he knew that Jason wouldn’t bother looking anyway.
The door slammed behind Darkness as he left. A few seconds later, The door opened. Jason walked in with a HUGE smile on his face. "Panteen! We gone whoop that ass!", He yelled to himself. He took a drink of the beer. It appeared to taste a bit funny to him, but he turned that sumbitch up and drank it down. He heard his music hit on the PA. "Shit!", he yelled as he ran out the door.
The TV shut off with a thwack. Jason sat there speechless. He felt his phone buzz. He looked at it. It was a text from Erik. And even though Cash doesn’t read too good, he knew what it said "Get to my office.". Jason shoved the phone back in his pocket. "baby! I'm going to Erik's office! I'll be back in a little bit", He said.
The man-beast known as Darkness stood just beyond the tree line on this cloudy day in Michigan. He stood there under a fairly large oak tree, staring at the large yard of Jason Cash. His ears perked. He heard footsteps.
"Darkness", Came a voice. Darkness turned around. It was Rex Butler. "This is over.", Rex said. Darkness smiled from beneath his black hat. "I agree".
........
Jason Cash sat on the tailgate of his rusted up truck. It was dark out. The truck was parked by the Bloomfield hills pond.
"Danny fuck Anderson. Who in the fuck is Danny Anderson? Anybody know? My ass'll wait till yall do. I'd look that mess up, but my ass dont read too good. Yall know 'at mess. Where he from? Where he been? Where he goin? Hell I can tell ya that. He goin to get that ass handed to him. Hell last sumbitchin time I heard 'is name, he was gettin that ass handed to him by Corey Black. And Ai mean handed to him. Corey Black fed that sumbitch his own ass. Didnt even break a sweat neither. An seein that ..how in the actual hell is that sumbitch even in this match? Hell this match involves two current champs an a has been. Now..My ass knows that I dont know a damn thang bout him. Anderson could be a former champ. His ass could be a badass. Hell if zi know. Hell if I care either. The sumbitch is just in my sumbitchin way...and Im gone remove his no good ass from it...by way of a size thirteen boot up 'is ass. This mess aint about fuckin Danny Anderson. Hell naw. This sumbitch is about brangin them Pantyhose sumbitches down a notch. They asses aint damn it lost since war. They been havin that snivelin little bastard Jared Holmes interferin in shit. An I aint about ta let some piss poor little bastard like Danny Anderson stop my ass from takin down a member of panthose...Im lookin at you, ZMac. Yer ass is ZTs bitch..but at Slam, Im gone make ya my personal bitch for the night. As the great Negan from Walkin Dead says...Its bout ta get all pee pants city up in here fer yer ass. So Danny? Nothin personal..Seth just decided ta damn it throw yer ass to the wolves. You mighta done somethin ta piss that sumbitch off. I dont know. What my ass does know..Is that you in the wrong places.. On the wrong sumbitchin night..Against the wrong sumbitch. Yer luck mustve shit its pants an ran the fuck off."
Jason took a drink from his bottle of beer.
"ZMac n cheese! Boy its been a while since I've had the pleasure of takin yer old head an stompin on that sumbitch with my boots. How ya been? Good? I see yer ass has recovered perty damn good from the beatins my brother done gave yer ass. Hell Archer an me's the only ZT guys what aint pinned yer ass. Of course I was able ta stomp yer ass when we first got here.. J pinned ya after feedin you yer own ass. Hell..I thought you was tough shit, Z. The horrocore champ. A legend in the internet division! But know what? My ass was left wantin more. Hell I love a good fight an yer ass didn't brang it. You was in there lookin like a puppy dog bitch. Hell yer ass started lookin like a bitch soon as ZT got here..an now that ya got some buddies..I bet yer ass is thankin ya aint just a bitch no more. Shit son. Yer ass is immortal. You always gone be our bitch. Till the day yer ass dies...which is never. That means yer always gone be our bitch. We got alot of bitches...So you'd never be lonely.
Hell Im kinda sad that I haven't hear yer el oh el faggot schtick...you know..The one yer ass has ran into the ground? I get 'at mess though. Ya get comes up on 'at nose candy an ya just lose yer sumbitchin mind.....ya start gettin yer ass whooped an suddenly..all ya can say is el oh el faggot over an over again. I get 'at mess. I really do. It's sad. Ya had so much...potential. Ya had everything ya needed. An what happened? ZT happened..thats what. An we put yer ass in yer place. Showed ya that you aint shit. You never was shit..compared to us anyway....An yer ass would never BE shit. Ya mighta been shit 'fore ZT got here..but ya aint shit no more. Now? Hell son...now yer just another bitch...A has been.
Ya remind me of that troll what lived under the bridge. Always runnin yer mouth. Cept instead of paying the bridge troll money to get to the other side..Its you ain't in the dub unless you done stomped a mudhole in ole Zs ass. Always just talkin mess. Like with Battle. How many times that sumbitch done stomped a mudhole in yer ass. An yer ass still goes at 'im like you ain't never lost to 'im. Hell Z...yer startin to remind me of Adam Young. I haven't seen that sumbitch win a match yet an he goes round like his ass I king of the sumbitchin world when he just gettin laughed at. Hell you damn near the same...only difference I yer ass surrounded herself with folks better than you. Which makes my ass laugh. Coked up madman surrounds his self with better. I tell ya what..yer ass ain't worth a pint of piss in a fight...but when it comes ta trollin? Hell yer the master...Thang is ...this is a fight an you ain't equipped too good ta handle it. Yer brangin a banana to a sumbitchin nuclear war. Thank that'll work out fer ya? That shit wont. You can get all coked out. Do all the drugs. Fuck the finish..Dont matter. Ya just ain't got it, son. Not no more atlesast..an I have ta damn it wonder if ya ever were. Hell my ass ain't seen ya do shit in my time here. An I know we aint been in wsssf long but...hell ya just keep gettin yer ass whooped over an over again. How in the hell was you ever even a champ in that damn rang? Huh? I just dont get I. You a bitch, Z. You's a bitch. At this point, you oughta just retire...Save a little face. Tell Pantyhose ya quit cause ya got so much bitch in ya..its hard to get up in the mornin. Thad be better 'an gettin a big ole Zero Tolerance ass whoopin over an over an over again. Right? Right. But not this week...Oh hell no..Not this week. See this week ya gone get feed yer own ass....an Im the cook. That means I'll be beatin ya from pillar ta sumbitchin post..while ya scream like the bitch you are. An if yer little buddy Jared wants ta come in? Well I'll be glad ta play marionettes with his ass.... While my boots up 'is ass makin 'im dance.
Yer a funny sumbitch though, Walkin Dead. I give ya that mess. I watch ya..laugh my ass off..then feel bad fer ya. I feel bad cause you actually believe the bullshit what comes out yer mouth. Just mouth shittin all over the sumbitchin place. See..yer the type of sumbitch what thanks runnin his cock sucker wins matches. I reckon that's why I aint seen yer worthless ass win a sumbitchin match till them Partheon sumbitches came back. I mean..Ive seen ya flap yer nut sack lickers....then good dick suckin lips of yers...an in the three or four months ZT been here..You just been gettin yer ass handed to ya. For fucks sake last slam was the only damn time yer ass ain't lost since we been here. An then that sumbitch hit me like a truck. That's when my ass realized that you actually believe than runnin those piss flaps you call a mouth is what wins. So I gotta ask. Just what in the hell you gone do? Just get in that sumbitchin rang talkin? Cause Im just gone shove my boot so far up yer ass yer gone be tastin shit an leather fer the rest of yer life. An I mean 'at mess. Im gone actually shove my gotdamn boot right up yer ass.
An all tho talk bout gimmicks. That's all yall sumbitches do is talk bout gimmicks. Gimmick this..gimmick that. I aint no gimmick. ZT aint no gimmick. At..Sep..J...aint no gimmick. I love a good ass fight. Tougher the sumbirch cross from me I..more my ass likes it. But I reckon actually bein real is a gimmick..cause 'ats all yall Partheon sumbitches say. But since we on 'at mess..I bet I can guess yer gimmick. I bet my ass can. An its fuckin brilliant. Yer gimmick..is that yer a sumbitch what just gets 'is ass whooped. Kinda like Rocky..but yer ass never wins.. Sound bout right? I reckon so...cause that's what ya do every damn time ya step 'tween them ropes....Ya lose.
Then there Partheon...I still dont know why them sumbitches picked ya. From what I've seen..they atlesst win on a consistent basis. While they winnin...You eatin ass with a spoon. While they gettin their hand raised, yer layin there talkin bout el oh el faggot after you just got that ass whooped...again...an again..an again. For fucks sake...they decent in the rang...Yer bout as worthless as a retarded cripple in that sumbitch. It ain't the drugs why they took ya in. They got 'at mess anyway. It aint yer fightin shot..Cause the only thang yer ass can do in that sumbitch is get beat on. Now...My ass dont claim to be the smartest sumbitch around...but I can put two an two together...an only thang I can figure is that when you ain't runnin yer cock sucker...You got them piss flaps you call lips wrapped round a Partheon dick...puttin 'at sumbitch to good use. Yer a fuckin joke, Mac..A damn joke. Aint worth a shit. Yer an even bigger joke than Adam Young.
Jason grinned and stared out at the pond. The moonlight glittered off the pond.
"Then there was Teddy Blaze. What can I say bout this sumbitch? He's good in the rang. He beat Battle twice in one sumbitchin night.. So ya know his ass aint no slouch. He can handle his self. Cant take that mess away from 'im. Thang is.. His ass aint never been in that rang with a sumbitch like me. Whats that mean? Well It means he's gone get that ass whooped, of course! See...I know I don’t have exactly the greatest rasslin moves. I don’t do flips. I don’t do them fancy submission hold. Hah. A good choke'll work. No need ta wrap yer legs round an ole boy six times while ya pink 'is left ass cheek and whiper "I love you" in 'is ear. Nah... A good ole choke'll work. No need ta take them sumbitches ta suplex city. I can take yer ass ta pee pants city with a stomp of my boot. But Teddy Blaze is damn good all the same. Beatin a guy like Gemini Battle twice in one night aint nothing to over look. It's means his ass is damn good. But...is damn good....good enough? I don’t damn it thank so. Nah... To whoop my ass ya gotta be better than damn good. You gotta be good as all hell ta whoop this ass. If ya aint? Well hell son..If ya aint then yer gone get beat from pillar to sumbitchin post and aint a damn thang yer ass can damn it do bout that mess. Not a damn thang.
But while Teddy here is damn good in the rang... I kinda fee bad. I mean..I gotta beat 'is ass an everythang. And I’m gone beat that ass. Aint not doubt about that mess...I'm gonna put boots ta his ass. But...I"m thankin this sumbitch might be homeless. I mean.. Have we seen his home? Have we seen his ass sleepin in a bed? Naw...His ass sleeps in the locker room. Hell his ass might just be dedicated as all hell. Sumbitch sleeps in the locker room..Flies to the next arena...and just lives in that sumbitch... and then does that mess all over again. So....I guess you could say he aint homeless... But lets face it.. That sumbitch is homeless. Dedicated... but homeless as hell. Least his ass dont look homeless.... Like bishop or Nuke rat. Nuke Rat looks like his ass just climbed out the sumbitchin gutter.....worthless ass.... But Teddy? Teddy aint worthless. He dangerous.... But I’m dangerous....er. That’s right. I'm dangerouser than Teddy.
I just wanna say..Teddy.. This mess aint personal. It aint. Hell any other time, I wouldn’t be stompin a mud hole in yer ass...But see...I gotta brang Pantyhose down a notch. And that means I gotta put Zmac n Cheese in his place. I gotta pin 'im..I gotta embarrass that sumbitch.. And you? Yer just colateral damage, son... Just somebody who oughta be watchin from the sidelines while Pantyhose gets put down a rung on this damn ladder. Hell I'm gone knock Walkin Dead off that sumbitch. Yer ass can try an stop it...Wont do no damn good. I'll just beat the hell outta all three of yall sumbitches. An that aint no damn threat...that sumbitch is a promise. Jason Cash don’t make threats...Hell naw! Jason Cash makes promises. Either one of yall sumbitches get in my way of takin down Walkin Dead....I'm gone wipe my ass with ya."
Jason took a drink of his beer. It'd been sitting there, ignored and was now warm. Jason made a funny face, but drank it down anyway.
"I reckon what I’m tryin ta say is this mess. Yall luck done damn it run away. It done shit it's pants an was replaced by saddness..Saddness of havin ta be in that rang with a sumbitch what don’t give a damn what you thank you can do...What you thank you done in the past...An what you thank you can do in the damn future. It don’t make a damn..Cause at Slam...Yall getting in the rang with Jason CAsh....The man whats called the hillbilly hero for a sumbitchin reason. What that reason is..I don’t damn it know. I still don’t get that mess...Weird as hell...But what I do know...Is that I'm gone beat that ass....All the ass...It's gone get beat. Anderson..Blaze...an specially Walkin Dead... I'm gone beat his ass till that sumbitch falls off."
Jason threw the empty bottle into the bond
scene fades
Jason Cash stumbled backstage. No, it wasn't due to alcohol. Jason drank constantly, but it didn't affect him quite as much as most would assume. The truth was that he simply didnt know. He'd felt weak. He'd seen double. His body felt like it was fighting him tooth and nail just to stay conscious. It been that way for hours. To put it truthfully, the man known as the hillbilly hero simply should never have fought. But you can't tell Jason these things. The man was tough as nails. He would never listen anyway. He'd fought as hard as he could. He'd hit the rebel yell on Joey flash, rendering the WCF legend incapacitated...Needing to be saved via his teammates. He'd attacked the ringside Pantheon members head on. But what was wrong?
Jason was being led to the Zero Tolerance locker room by Crazy J and Adrian Archer. Each had an arm around the big man, who could barely move his own feet. "Stop! I gotta sumbitchin puke.", Jason yelled just as they got to the door. His ZT brother leaned him up against the wall and watched as our hillbilly hero puked his guts out. J looked down. Normally, he would have something insane to say. After all, J was about five beers short of a six pack. But what he saw on that floor brought a sense of clarity. This wasn't half digested food and liquid ion the floor. No. This was blood. J looked at it wide eyed. A worried look crossed his face as Jason just kept puking and puking. "We have to get him to a hospital!", said Archer. "My ass is fine, At. I just need a beer.", Jason weakly answered, blood dripping from his mouth. Archer shook his head. "Nah man. You need a doctor. You're puking up blood." Archer said, obviously worried about his new friend. Jason meekly shook his head. "My ass ain't goin ta no doctor.", Jason answered. "My ass just damn it needs a sumbitchin beer!", Jason added. His vision blurred. His vision blinked. His vision blacked out.
Light. Intense, white light flooded Jason Cash's eyes as he slowly opened them. Pain shot through those eyes, causing him to try and blink the pain away. It didn't work, however. The pain shot through his eye sockets like bullets and came to a stop in his head. He tried to tough his face, but he felt his arms tied down. He looked to his left. He looked to his right. Straps. His arms were strapped down. He looked down as much as he could. He was make. His heart started beating so fast that he thought it would leave or explode in his chest. He looked around. He was in a hospital bed, the constant beeping of the heart monitor let him know that he was still alive.
The room was all white. There was the usual equipment there above him. There was the heart monitor. There was the oxygen monitor. There was an IV going into his arm. Jason's jaw dropped when he saw what was going through the IV. Instead of the usual clear liquid, this was black and thick looking. His heart started beating faster. He looked around the white room. No sunlight came through the curtained window. And the room was cold. Jason had never been so cold before. Maybe it was due to the fact that he was naked.
The door opened with a creak. Jason's eyes grew wide. He'd been alone this whole time, who could this be? A man walked through the door. He was a large man. His face was painted white with black accents around the eyes. He had a short Mohawk that was died blood red. He wore hot pink scrubs and a white doctors jacket.
"Crazy J?"
The man cocked his head to the side. "Crazy J? Who is Crazy J?", the doctor asked. Jason tried to grin but the pain was too much. "Yer ass is J. Dont damn it fuck wit me.", Jason replied. The doctor chuckeled out loud. It was a creepy sound. It sounded like skin crawling. "Im not Crazy J, Jason. Im Dr. Boneherhard.", The good doctor .answered. Jason, again, tried to laugh, but pain shot through his body. "Calm down, Jason. You're in no shape to be doing any of that.", Dr. Boneherhard said flatly. "Sumbitch.", Jason started as he tried to get loose. "J! Gotdamn it. Let my ass up!", Jason finished. The good doctor, again, cocked his head to the side. "I told you. Im not J.", Dr. Boneherhard said as he looked at his notes. He then frowned. "It's gone to your head already. This is not good news.", Dr. Boneherhard said worriedly. Jasons eyes grew wide. "What's gone to my sumbitchin head?", Jason asked. Dr Bonherhard scratched his head as if he'd thought his patient knew what he had. Then he shrugged his shoulders. "Why you have Likith ghonnashyphilaids. And a bad case of it.", Dr. Boneherhard told our hillbilly hero. "Gonna sypha what?", Cash asked. The doctor grinned. "Ghonnasyphilaids...Lilith's ghonnasyphilaids to be exact. This means that an acid like disease is eating your insides much like the acid that comes from Lilith's snatch.", Dr. Boneherhard said flatly. Jason, again, tried to get loose.
"Tell me, Mr. Cash...Have you gone down on Lilith any time this year?"
"Shit naw. I wouldn't touch that bitch with yer dick.", Jason answered. Dr. Boneherhard chuckled. "Yea I didn't ask you that. Have you touched her snatch with your mouth?", Dr. Boneherhard asked our hero. Jason felt sick, which only made his pain worse. "Shit naw.", Jason answered. Dr. Boneherhard wrote the answers down on his paper. "Well..You may have gotten it rectally.", the good doctor said with a smile. Jason furrowed his eye brows. "Rectally? The hell does that mean?", Jason asked. Dr Boneherhard smiled a big smile, showing his popcorn butter colored teeth. "Why up the ass of course. And there is only one way to find out.", Dr. Boneherhard said with glee. He walked over to the far corner, reached into a drawer and pulled out a serrated, foot long peice of metal. Jason cringe as the doctor began to walk over to him.
"Noooooooo!"
Light. Intense, bright white light flooded Jasons eyes when he tried to open them. Pain shot through him from his eyeballs to the back of his head. It was wearing pain. His body felt like he'd been hit by a truck. He was pale. He felt weak. He looked down. Blue hospital gown. He looked around. All the usual equipment was there. There was an IV going through to his right arm. The liquid going through it was clear. Our hillbilly hero thought to himself, "what in the shit is goin on?". He heard a toilet flush. The door opened. Erik's wife, Nicole, walked..No..waddled into the room. She wore jjeans and a maternity shirt. It was blue with gold trim. She was about eight months pregnant after all. Her blue eyes lit up when she saw Jason awake. "Babe!", she said excitedly. Jason smiled. "I've been waiting for you to wake up for hours.", she said. Jason scratched his head. "I just took a little nap a little bit ago.", Jason replied. Nicole shook her head. "Babe, you've been in a coma for an entire day.", she said. Jasons heart began to beat faster. That explained the weird dream. He was hoping that he really didnt have rectal ghonnasyphilaids. "Dr Boneherhard around?", Jason asked. Nicole stared at him. "Dr who?", she asked. Jason looked at her for a moment. "Tknow. Dr. Boneherhard. Sumbitch told me I had ghonnasyphilaids. Said he was gone shove somethin up my ass to diagnose.", Jason answered. This made his wife laugh a bit. She always did find something funny in serious situations. "Jason, your doctors name if Fuchs.", she told him. "So I don't have rectal ghonnasyphilaids?", he said letting out a sigh of relief. "Where the fellas?", he asked. "Erik sent them away in business. He wanted to be here himself, but got an urgent call and had to leave.", she told him. Jason nodded his head. He understood everything. It was all business after all.
There was a knock on the door. Nicole got off of the bed as she'd been sitting on it. The door opened and in walked a rather short lady. She was about as wide as she was tall, which was about five feet. The first thought through Jason's mind was "This cant be a midget stripper". And it wasn’t. "I'm Dr Reynolds. I’m glad you're awake. We didn’t think you'd be awake for a while", The doctor said. Jason didnt know whether he should be happy and smile, or worried and frown, so he did the only thing he knew to do. He stared blankly at her until she looked at the chart. "We believe you were poisoned.", She said. Nicole gasped. Jason stared blankly. "We're not sure what was in it. We do know that rat poison was in there, was was rufelin.", The doctor said with a straight voice. Jason couldn’t hold it. He started laughing. "Somebody damn it rufied my ass?!", he yelled. Nicole shook her head. The doctor, who didnt really know Jason Cash simply nodded. "Sort of. Do you have any enemies, Jason?", She asked. Jason grinned from ear to ear. "Enemies? Well...Them Panteen sumbitches dont like my ass too much, but I don’t damn it thank they'd poison my ass.", Jason told her. Dr. Reynolds nodded. "We'll take some more blood. You'll be good to go home after. It seems like the effects have worn off", She said. Jason gulped. If there was one thing in this world Jason Cash hated..It was needles.
...The next evening....
The sun had gone down on Detroit, Michigan. It had been a rainy day for those in Detroit after storm after storm had moved through the area with high winds and hail. It was something that the Detroit area very rarely saw, so most people decided to raid the super markets and grocery stores for supplies. That mean that there wasn’t anyone on the streets as Erik Black stared out of his window. He was lost in thought. Who could have poisoned Jason? Darkness? Someone else? Someone from Pantheon? They were the type to do that sort of thing..Anything to get a win, yknow? But would they? They thought themselves superior anyway? Then again, they did always need Jared Holmes to interfere to win.
"Mr. Black. He's here"
The two double doors that led into Erik Black's office swung open at the touch of a button. In walked Jason Cash. He looked tired... Dead tired. His skin was pale. He walked with a limp. He looked like the walking dead. Maybe the poison was still in his system. Maybe he was just tired from the flight. He and Nicole had gotten on the soonest flight to make it back so quickly. He walked straight for the mini fridge and got himself a beer. He took a long drink. Erik waited, eyes looking over at Jason as if he were studying our hillbilly hero. "How do you feel?", Erik asked when Jason reached in for a second beer. Jason shrugged and took another long drink. "Fine I reckon. Sumbitchin doctor said I got ruffied.", Jason told Erik. Black rubbed his chin, thinking. "Think them Panteen sumbitches did it? They do any damn thang ta get that win.", Jason asked. Erik shook his head. "No. I think it was some one else.", Erik said. Jason thought for a minute as well. Erik broke the silence. "I believe it was darkness.", Erik said. Jason's jaw dropped. "YOu think he was in hawaii?", Jason asked. Erik nodded. "We never found a body and I thought he was dead years ago. I wouldn’t put it past him", Erik said as calm as he could. Deep inside the man was burning. He wanted to feel Darkness' heart stop with his own hands...again. Jason did as well. If Darkness was behind this, he nearly killed Jason. He couldn’t imagine what would happen to his family with him gone. He did have another child on the way after all. "We have to find him before this gets worse.", Erik said. He walked over to his desk and pressed his intercom button. "Jennifer. Get me Rex. Send him straight in when he gets here.", Erik said.
Jason sat down on the white leather couch. If was one of the most comfortable couches he'd ever put his ass on. He nearly feel asleep, but remembered that he had beer to drink. It'd been nearly two days since he'd had one. Part of him said to take it slow...But the part that didn’t give a shit took over. He'd just finished his third beer when the doors opened. In walked Rex Butler. Rex was once an in ring competitor with Zero Tolerance. He was a big man. He stood about six foot ten. He weight about three hundred pounds. His head was shaved and he had the eyes of a killer. He wore simple jeans and a blood stained grey shirt. He and Jason had retired the Global WRestling Alliance Tag Team Titles when the place closed years ago. They ewre undefeated. Erik Black had even feuded with Rex in AWA a year or two before Gemini Battle arrived there. Erik always said that there were two people on this earth that he would consider his toughest matchups. ONe was REx. The other was Jaymz. Jaosn and Rex were a strange, but very capable and dangerous team. ONe could think of them as the odd couple. Rex was always very serious. He wasnt one to joke around. He had a very quick temper. Jason hasn’t changed one bit. He's still the beer swilling country boy he'd always been.
It had been years since Jason and Rex had seen each other. Jason jumped off the couch with a huge smile across his face. This was a smile so wide that his chew nearly fell out of his mouth. REx saw the hug coming and rolled his eyes. "Big Ugly!", Jason yelled as he hugged Rex. "Jason Cash.", Rex said, trying to his his annoyance. Jason didn’t notice the tone. He did have that habit of not really getting what was going on around him. Rex tolerated him. Jaymz hated him. And Cash was none the wiser. "How the hell ya been, big ugly?", Jason asked. Rex shrugged his shoulders. "You know...Just killin.", Rex said. Jason's eyes grew wide. "Boy yer ass aint damn it changed a bit!", Jason said. Erik cleared his throat. Jason looked at his with a cocked eybrow. "Get that mess outa yer throat?", He asked. Erik put his head down and rubbed his temples. "Rex. Where did you track Darkness to?", Erik asked. Rex Butler stopped to think. "Well. I didn’t see any tracks on the road near Bloomfield Hills. I got some security footage that would place him near the airport.", Rex said. Erik's icy blue eyes glimmered with recognition. "When?", Erik asked. "Saturday morning", Rex answered. Erik thought for a moment.
Meanwhile, Jason was still in awe of seeing Rex again. It had been over seven years since he'd seen REx last. Hell Jason was barely over drinking age while they were dominating. "Do you think he could have gone to Hawaii?", Erik asked. Rex looked at Jason, who was getting himself another chew, out of the corner of his eyes. Erik nodded. Rex slowly nodded. "I do.", He added. Erik had thought as much. Darkness had taken a step away from simple stalking and taken a step toward murder. He needed to be stopped. He needed Jaymz. Erik walked back behind his desk. Rex sat beside the wide eyed Jason Cash.
Scene began to fade.
..........
Thwak! Buzzzz!
The camera slowly zoomed put from the WCF News logo that sat at the center of the news desk. It panned up to the wide grin of Jigaboo Jerome, who was the only one sitting at the desk. His wide grin showed off a bit of the chew he had in his lip.
Jerome: Hello and welcome to a WCF News Special Report. Im Jigaboo Jerome.
He turned slightly to hulis right and began to straighten some papers.
Jerome: For years Zombie McMorris terrorized the hardcore and internet division. He'd held those title many times. His snarky comments on twitter garnered him quite a bit of fame. But lately, he's been facing loss after loss. He's been pinned ny Zero Tolerance three times now in the three times he's been in the ring with them. He's become known as Crazy Js bitch. Has he lost his luster? Has he lost that IT factor? I sent Big Dick Daryll out to find the answer.
Thwak! Buzzzz!
Big Dick Daryll walked through a Detroit shopping mall, microphone in hand. He found a rather old, well dressed man with greying hair. Big Dick quickly stopped the man.
Big Dick: Excuse me sir. Can I ask you a few questions?
The old man stopped and nodded. Big Dick put his right arm around the mans shoulders, nearly swallowing the smaller man.
Big Dick: What is your name, sir?
Man: Alex.
Big Dick smiled.
Big Dick: Nice to meet you, Alex. Tell me. Are you a WCF fan?
Alex: You bet your big ass I am.
Big Dick nodded.
Big Dick: So I assume you know Zombie McMorris. Tell me, Alex. Is he a WCF legendary champion? Or is he simply ZTs bitch?
Alex: ZTs bitch!
Well that was quick? But why did he think Zombie was simply ZTs bitch?
Big Dick: Why do you think this, Alex? ZMac has held a few championships. He might be the greatest ainternet Champ of all time.
Alex: Well..When you have three straight losses against what basically amounts to half a stable..You kind of become their bitch.
Again, Big Dick nodded.
Big Dick: So its safe to assume that Jason Cash will pin him to win the four way match at slam?
Alex nodded.
Alex: Jason Cash is my favorite .wrestler! I love that guy! His accent is sexy.
And Big Dick Daryll nearly fell over with a gut busting laugh.
Big Dick: Thank you, Alex.
Alex: I'd like to get me some of that.
Big Dick walked away as quickly as he could, laughing till he cried. He walked a bit more. He was approached by a skinny blonde kid. The young man wore skinny jeans, converse shoes and a tattered ZMac shirt. His teeth were damn near black and acne covered his face.
Kid: Big Dick Daryll!
Big Dick looked at the kid, but decided against it. He basically ignored the kid. But the kid yelled again. Big Dick stopped and looked at him.
Big Dick: So you wanna be on tv? What's your name?
Kid: Bobby.
Big Dick: So Bobby. We're here today to find out what the people think about Zombie McMorris. Is he a legendary WCF champion? Or ZTs bitch?
Bobby: Oh he's legendary! Zmac is the fucking man and he's gonna beat the shit put of Jason Cash at Slam.
Big Dick nodded, waiting for Bobby to finish.
Big Dick: Care to expand on that?
Bobby: fuck yea! Nobody in ZT cant hang with Zmac! Crazy J and Salem Shepard got fucking lucky!
It was about that time when Big Dick Daryll kicked poor Bobby directly in the face. What teeth this guy had flew out of his mouth. He fell in a heap.
The scene faded.
The camera zoomed away from the WCF News logo, showing Jigaboo Jerome. He shuffled some papers and turned slightly to his right.
Jerome: Wow. That was some amazing reporting by Big Dick Daryll. It seems like our question was answered. ZOmbie McMorris is nothing more than ZTs bitch. The people have spoken. Wait...
Jerome put his hand to his ear.
Jerome: Im getting word that not everyone thinks ZMac is ZTs bitch. Well fuck you guys. You're all wrong ZMac is ZTs bitch. He will always be ZTs bitch until the day he dies..and since he's imortal....that means he'll be ZTs bitch forever!
Jerome straightened hat hat.
Jerome: This has been a WCF News Special Report. Im Jigaboo Jerome...Signing off.
Thawk! Buzzz!
Jason Cash turned off the tv. He'd been sitting on a tattered, once hello but now brown couch. He threw the remote to his right and too a drink from his beer bottle. "That's a damn good news show them guys put on.", he said. There was laughter to his right. It was his wife, Nicole. She sat in a black leather recliner. Truthfully, it was the nicest thing in the trailer. That's right, they had a huge home, but still mainly lived in that beat the fuck up old trailer. "You're kidding, right?", she said. Jason turned his head quickly to look at her. "The hell you talkin bout, woman?", pur hillbilly hero asked. "Nothing, but you said THEY.", she answered. Jason looked at her with his eyebrow cocked. "Yea..THEY put on a damn good show. My favorite is that Jerome feller", Jason said with a wide grin. Nicole got up, walked over to Jason, and tapped him right in the balls. Jason doubled over. "Shouldn’t you be resting? You have a match...Which for some reason you agreed to.", She said. Jason, who was in quite a bit of pain from the ball slap weakly replied, "You thank I'm weak? Hell I could beat Blaze, ZMac n cheese and whoever the hell Danny Anderson is if I was crippled.". Nicole rolled her eyes. "You almost died this week. You shouldnt be wrestling.", She said. Jason laughed as much as he could. "I don’t damn it rassle. My as fiights. You wont see my ass doin them booty holds...or them sumbitchin flipity dos. My ass don’t do that mess. I just go in that sumbitch and put boots ta asses.", He said. She rolled her eyes again. "Well, whatever you want to call it...You shouldn’t be doing it.", She replied. Jason shook his head. She'd never really understand why Jason did what he did. He did it for her and his kids. But..You know...women. She walked away and left Jason sitting there on that yellow, but now brown couch.
The Tv, which was a smart TV, buzzed to life. Jason scratched his head. He'd never seen that happen before and really had no idea it was even possible. His jaw dropped and his dip fell out of his lip when he saw what was on it. He sat there watching Darkness enter the locker room. Darkness took out a vial and emptied the contents into an open beer bottle. Laughter echoed through the hall. Darkness heard. Darkness quickly left. He didn’t bother mixing the contents. I guess he knew that Jason wouldn’t bother looking anyway.
The door slammed behind Darkness as he left. A few seconds later, The door opened. Jason walked in with a HUGE smile on his face. "Panteen! We gone whoop that ass!", He yelled to himself. He took a drink of the beer. It appeared to taste a bit funny to him, but he turned that sumbitch up and drank it down. He heard his music hit on the PA. "Shit!", he yelled as he ran out the door.
The TV shut off with a thwack. Jason sat there speechless. He felt his phone buzz. He looked at it. It was a text from Erik. And even though Cash doesn’t read too good, he knew what it said "Get to my office.". Jason shoved the phone back in his pocket. "baby! I'm going to Erik's office! I'll be back in a little bit", He said.
The man-beast known as Darkness stood just beyond the tree line on this cloudy day in Michigan. He stood there under a fairly large oak tree, staring at the large yard of Jason Cash. His ears perked. He heard footsteps.
"Darkness", Came a voice. Darkness turned around. It was Rex Butler. "This is over.", Rex said. Darkness smiled from beneath his black hat. "I agree".
........
Jason Cash sat on the tailgate of his rusted up truck. It was dark out. The truck was parked by the Bloomfield hills pond.
"Danny fuck Anderson. Who in the fuck is Danny Anderson? Anybody know? My ass'll wait till yall do. I'd look that mess up, but my ass dont read too good. Yall know 'at mess. Where he from? Where he been? Where he goin? Hell I can tell ya that. He goin to get that ass handed to him. Hell last sumbitchin time I heard 'is name, he was gettin that ass handed to him by Corey Black. And Ai mean handed to him. Corey Black fed that sumbitch his own ass. Didnt even break a sweat neither. An seein that ..how in the actual hell is that sumbitch even in this match? Hell this match involves two current champs an a has been. Now..My ass knows that I dont know a damn thang bout him. Anderson could be a former champ. His ass could be a badass. Hell if zi know. Hell if I care either. The sumbitch is just in my sumbitchin way...and Im gone remove his no good ass from it...by way of a size thirteen boot up 'is ass. This mess aint about fuckin Danny Anderson. Hell naw. This sumbitch is about brangin them Pantyhose sumbitches down a notch. They asses aint damn it lost since war. They been havin that snivelin little bastard Jared Holmes interferin in shit. An I aint about ta let some piss poor little bastard like Danny Anderson stop my ass from takin down a member of panthose...Im lookin at you, ZMac. Yer ass is ZTs bitch..but at Slam, Im gone make ya my personal bitch for the night. As the great Negan from Walkin Dead says...Its bout ta get all pee pants city up in here fer yer ass. So Danny? Nothin personal..Seth just decided ta damn it throw yer ass to the wolves. You mighta done somethin ta piss that sumbitch off. I dont know. What my ass does know..Is that you in the wrong places.. On the wrong sumbitchin night..Against the wrong sumbitch. Yer luck mustve shit its pants an ran the fuck off."
Jason took a drink from his bottle of beer.
"ZMac n cheese! Boy its been a while since I've had the pleasure of takin yer old head an stompin on that sumbitch with my boots. How ya been? Good? I see yer ass has recovered perty damn good from the beatins my brother done gave yer ass. Hell Archer an me's the only ZT guys what aint pinned yer ass. Of course I was able ta stomp yer ass when we first got here.. J pinned ya after feedin you yer own ass. Hell..I thought you was tough shit, Z. The horrocore champ. A legend in the internet division! But know what? My ass was left wantin more. Hell I love a good fight an yer ass didn't brang it. You was in there lookin like a puppy dog bitch. Hell yer ass started lookin like a bitch soon as ZT got here..an now that ya got some buddies..I bet yer ass is thankin ya aint just a bitch no more. Shit son. Yer ass is immortal. You always gone be our bitch. Till the day yer ass dies...which is never. That means yer always gone be our bitch. We got alot of bitches...So you'd never be lonely.
Hell Im kinda sad that I haven't hear yer el oh el faggot schtick...you know..The one yer ass has ran into the ground? I get 'at mess though. Ya get comes up on 'at nose candy an ya just lose yer sumbitchin mind.....ya start gettin yer ass whooped an suddenly..all ya can say is el oh el faggot over an over again. I get 'at mess. I really do. It's sad. Ya had so much...potential. Ya had everything ya needed. An what happened? ZT happened..thats what. An we put yer ass in yer place. Showed ya that you aint shit. You never was shit..compared to us anyway....An yer ass would never BE shit. Ya mighta been shit 'fore ZT got here..but ya aint shit no more. Now? Hell son...now yer just another bitch...A has been.
Ya remind me of that troll what lived under the bridge. Always runnin yer mouth. Cept instead of paying the bridge troll money to get to the other side..Its you ain't in the dub unless you done stomped a mudhole in ole Zs ass. Always just talkin mess. Like with Battle. How many times that sumbitch done stomped a mudhole in yer ass. An yer ass still goes at 'im like you ain't never lost to 'im. Hell Z...yer startin to remind me of Adam Young. I haven't seen that sumbitch win a match yet an he goes round like his ass I king of the sumbitchin world when he just gettin laughed at. Hell you damn near the same...only difference I yer ass surrounded herself with folks better than you. Which makes my ass laugh. Coked up madman surrounds his self with better. I tell ya what..yer ass ain't worth a pint of piss in a fight...but when it comes ta trollin? Hell yer the master...Thang is ...this is a fight an you ain't equipped too good ta handle it. Yer brangin a banana to a sumbitchin nuclear war. Thank that'll work out fer ya? That shit wont. You can get all coked out. Do all the drugs. Fuck the finish..Dont matter. Ya just ain't got it, son. Not no more atlesast..an I have ta damn it wonder if ya ever were. Hell my ass ain't seen ya do shit in my time here. An I know we aint been in wsssf long but...hell ya just keep gettin yer ass whooped over an over again. How in the hell was you ever even a champ in that damn rang? Huh? I just dont get I. You a bitch, Z. You's a bitch. At this point, you oughta just retire...Save a little face. Tell Pantyhose ya quit cause ya got so much bitch in ya..its hard to get up in the mornin. Thad be better 'an gettin a big ole Zero Tolerance ass whoopin over an over an over again. Right? Right. But not this week...Oh hell no..Not this week. See this week ya gone get feed yer own ass....an Im the cook. That means I'll be beatin ya from pillar ta sumbitchin post..while ya scream like the bitch you are. An if yer little buddy Jared wants ta come in? Well I'll be glad ta play marionettes with his ass.... While my boots up 'is ass makin 'im dance.
Yer a funny sumbitch though, Walkin Dead. I give ya that mess. I watch ya..laugh my ass off..then feel bad fer ya. I feel bad cause you actually believe the bullshit what comes out yer mouth. Just mouth shittin all over the sumbitchin place. See..yer the type of sumbitch what thanks runnin his cock sucker wins matches. I reckon that's why I aint seen yer worthless ass win a sumbitchin match till them Partheon sumbitches came back. I mean..Ive seen ya flap yer nut sack lickers....then good dick suckin lips of yers...an in the three or four months ZT been here..You just been gettin yer ass handed to ya. For fucks sake last slam was the only damn time yer ass ain't lost since we been here. An then that sumbitch hit me like a truck. That's when my ass realized that you actually believe than runnin those piss flaps you call a mouth is what wins. So I gotta ask. Just what in the hell you gone do? Just get in that sumbitchin rang talkin? Cause Im just gone shove my boot so far up yer ass yer gone be tastin shit an leather fer the rest of yer life. An I mean 'at mess. Im gone actually shove my gotdamn boot right up yer ass.
An all tho talk bout gimmicks. That's all yall sumbitches do is talk bout gimmicks. Gimmick this..gimmick that. I aint no gimmick. ZT aint no gimmick. At..Sep..J...aint no gimmick. I love a good ass fight. Tougher the sumbirch cross from me I..more my ass likes it. But I reckon actually bein real is a gimmick..cause 'ats all yall Partheon sumbitches say. But since we on 'at mess..I bet I can guess yer gimmick. I bet my ass can. An its fuckin brilliant. Yer gimmick..is that yer a sumbitch what just gets 'is ass whooped. Kinda like Rocky..but yer ass never wins.. Sound bout right? I reckon so...cause that's what ya do every damn time ya step 'tween them ropes....Ya lose.
Then there Partheon...I still dont know why them sumbitches picked ya. From what I've seen..they atlesst win on a consistent basis. While they winnin...You eatin ass with a spoon. While they gettin their hand raised, yer layin there talkin bout el oh el faggot after you just got that ass whooped...again...an again..an again. For fucks sake...they decent in the rang...Yer bout as worthless as a retarded cripple in that sumbitch. It ain't the drugs why they took ya in. They got 'at mess anyway. It aint yer fightin shot..Cause the only thang yer ass can do in that sumbitch is get beat on. Now...My ass dont claim to be the smartest sumbitch around...but I can put two an two together...an only thang I can figure is that when you ain't runnin yer cock sucker...You got them piss flaps you call lips wrapped round a Partheon dick...puttin 'at sumbitch to good use. Yer a fuckin joke, Mac..A damn joke. Aint worth a shit. Yer an even bigger joke than Adam Young.
Jason grinned and stared out at the pond. The moonlight glittered off the pond.
"Then there was Teddy Blaze. What can I say bout this sumbitch? He's good in the rang. He beat Battle twice in one sumbitchin night.. So ya know his ass aint no slouch. He can handle his self. Cant take that mess away from 'im. Thang is.. His ass aint never been in that rang with a sumbitch like me. Whats that mean? Well It means he's gone get that ass whooped, of course! See...I know I don’t have exactly the greatest rasslin moves. I don’t do flips. I don’t do them fancy submission hold. Hah. A good choke'll work. No need ta wrap yer legs round an ole boy six times while ya pink 'is left ass cheek and whiper "I love you" in 'is ear. Nah... A good ole choke'll work. No need ta take them sumbitches ta suplex city. I can take yer ass ta pee pants city with a stomp of my boot. But Teddy Blaze is damn good all the same. Beatin a guy like Gemini Battle twice in one night aint nothing to over look. It's means his ass is damn good. But...is damn good....good enough? I don’t damn it thank so. Nah... To whoop my ass ya gotta be better than damn good. You gotta be good as all hell ta whoop this ass. If ya aint? Well hell son..If ya aint then yer gone get beat from pillar to sumbitchin post and aint a damn thang yer ass can damn it do bout that mess. Not a damn thang.
But while Teddy here is damn good in the rang... I kinda fee bad. I mean..I gotta beat 'is ass an everythang. And I’m gone beat that ass. Aint not doubt about that mess...I'm gonna put boots ta his ass. But...I"m thankin this sumbitch might be homeless. I mean.. Have we seen his home? Have we seen his ass sleepin in a bed? Naw...His ass sleeps in the locker room. Hell his ass might just be dedicated as all hell. Sumbitch sleeps in the locker room..Flies to the next arena...and just lives in that sumbitch... and then does that mess all over again. So....I guess you could say he aint homeless... But lets face it.. That sumbitch is homeless. Dedicated... but homeless as hell. Least his ass dont look homeless.... Like bishop or Nuke rat. Nuke Rat looks like his ass just climbed out the sumbitchin gutter.....worthless ass.... But Teddy? Teddy aint worthless. He dangerous.... But I’m dangerous....er. That’s right. I'm dangerouser than Teddy.
I just wanna say..Teddy.. This mess aint personal. It aint. Hell any other time, I wouldn’t be stompin a mud hole in yer ass...But see...I gotta brang Pantyhose down a notch. And that means I gotta put Zmac n Cheese in his place. I gotta pin 'im..I gotta embarrass that sumbitch.. And you? Yer just colateral damage, son... Just somebody who oughta be watchin from the sidelines while Pantyhose gets put down a rung on this damn ladder. Hell I'm gone knock Walkin Dead off that sumbitch. Yer ass can try an stop it...Wont do no damn good. I'll just beat the hell outta all three of yall sumbitches. An that aint no damn threat...that sumbitch is a promise. Jason Cash don’t make threats...Hell naw! Jason Cash makes promises. Either one of yall sumbitches get in my way of takin down Walkin Dead....I'm gone wipe my ass with ya."
Jason took a drink of his beer. It'd been sitting there, ignored and was now warm. Jason made a funny face, but drank it down anyway.
"I reckon what I’m tryin ta say is this mess. Yall luck done damn it run away. It done shit it's pants an was replaced by saddness..Saddness of havin ta be in that rang with a sumbitch what don’t give a damn what you thank you can do...What you thank you done in the past...An what you thank you can do in the damn future. It don’t make a damn..Cause at Slam...Yall getting in the rang with Jason CAsh....The man whats called the hillbilly hero for a sumbitchin reason. What that reason is..I don’t damn it know. I still don’t get that mess...Weird as hell...But what I do know...Is that I'm gone beat that ass....All the ass...It's gone get beat. Anderson..Blaze...an specially Walkin Dead... I'm gone beat his ass till that sumbitch falls off."
Jason threw the empty bottle into the bond
scene fades
