Post by Salem Shepard on Sept 12, 2016 23:06:20 GMT -5
Crazy J: Welcome to the next episode of Backstage with the FrEeKsHoW...as always I am your co host Big Daddy J and this is....
Schizo Shep: Your favorite schizo - your boy shep.
Crazy J: So you about to be tag team champs with our boy Cash...
Schizo Shep: yo dog... Did you know you could make biscuits out of Skittles?
Crazy J: yeah, bitch biscuits...them straight up taste like bitches... and your Boy J knows how bitches taste... When you can lick inside your own nose, the bitches get all worked up.
Schizo Shep: yo man that shit with Lisa last week... i know it was rough, but dude, I heard a rumor you dug her up and had sex with her?
Crazy J: Dude ...you cant believe everything you hear. That is how rumors spread bro
Schizo Shep: oh good, I am glad that didnt happen homie...
Crazy J: Oh no!!! That shit happened but you still should not believe everything... but for the record, i rocked the dead... i fucked that girl hard core.
Schizo Shep: You know, a long time ago I had a different tag partner.
Crazy J: Did you win Tag belts?
Schizo Shep: Naw dawg. See, it was my homie and we both had this same girl....So on the way out I would tag him in.
Crazy J: So you and Cash share the same girls too?
Schizo Shep: Dawg!! He married!!!
Crazy J: I know. I didnt know he shared her though..... hold on brother... dude did you know we have a WAR coming?
Schizo Shep: Yeah man me and Twilight are playing WAR tonight i am going to lay down and she is going to blow the fuck out of me.
Crazy J: Look-y look-y shep is going to box her tonight!
Schizo Shep: boxing?
Crazy J: yeah she is going to give you 20 blows to the head.
Schizo Shep: I think thats enough about my personal life...Lets talk about what happened tonight. I see that Cap Condom cost his team the match?
Crazy J: Yeah, he got lost in Bishops beard. I heard there was fries hiding in there somewhere.
Schizo Shep: Yeah, I snuck a few in his beard when we had a match with him a while back. I wanted to see if they were still there later. Did Cap Condom find them?
Crazy J: I think so....I dont know? He probably ate them if he did.
Schizo Shep: I have to ask, did he get blood all over the ring?
Crazy J: I dont know, I was just pissed i did not get to finish him off
Schizo Shep: I just wanted to make sure that condom he wears on his head didn't bust. I bet Trojan makes them for him, high quality product. Those have kept my wiener from swelling up to the size of a windex bottle many times.
Crazy J: Lets read some fan mail....So Billy is 11 years old from Humbolt California area; and he has a question for you Shep.... What do you do when your mom is being a cunt and wont let you watch WCF because her drug dealer is coming to play leap frog with her?
Schizo Shep: Leap frog?
Crazy J: I emailed him back and he says he caught her naked on the bed... on her hands and knees... and the drug dealer was trying to hop over her but he got stuck on her big ass... not sure whats going on their but what advice do you have for Billy?
Schizo Shep: Burn. The. House. Down. You cant unsee that shit, little man. So burn the house down, or stab your eyes out with sporks...WHATEVER!!!!! Try to erase that from your memory. its like seeing your sister in the shower, after a minute or two, you dont want to see that anymore.
Crazy J: yeah it only----A MINUTE OR TWO!? What the fuck homie!?!?!
Schizo Shep: I meant...um, turn away immediately!!! Ok, we have one more fan question: "Dear Zero Tolerance. I wanted to buy some of your merchandise, but most of them have a blood splatter ZT logo and my mom wont let me have anything with blood on it." Sincerely, Tommy Caraway. 10 years old"
Well, Tommy, first of all your mother is a whore!!! ok!!??
Crazy J: So does your whore master move out every 28 days when she is flowing blood all over pads and tampons and even her panties??? Hey if she has any dirty ones, take that shit to school and sell them to the older boys!! Make sure to put a ZT logo on it, sell it for $50 and send your homeboy Crazy J $25 for everyone, ok?
Schizo Shep: Well, I think that about wraps us up for the day. Your team won, Cash and I won...Another successful night for Zero fuckin Tolerance!!
Crazy J: Tune in next week!!! And make sure to be on the look out for another AMAZING episode of Backstage with the FrEeKsHoW!!!!
