Post by Crazy J zt on Aug 26, 2016 10:38:51 GMT -5
Crazy J, is sitting between Shep and Cash on their way to Grand Cayman Island. The three of the them had enough to drink and J has either taken no meds or many meds depending if the dreams were dreams or if they was real at least the waking up parts…. J seems to in his happy stage at this point as he was just forced to change seats with the cunt but he was happy he was no longer stuck between two fat fucks.
Crazy J: so cash you’re a redneck you should know this one were do you get virgin wool from… Ugly sheep … get it fucker.
One of the flight attendants come over and she looks over at Cash and she looks down at his rebel Flag belt buckle.
Cash: So man..you like my sumbitchin belt buckle? It's look might fine with yer forehead on it neath it
Crazy J: I am sorry he is a little slow... but if you was a tree my boy cash would be a squirrel and he would store his nuts in you… but hey lady… did you hear about the blind whore? Well you got to hand it to her… get it because she blind you have to put your dick in her hand… Why aren’t you laughing… damn it we got us another stuck up cunt.
Flight attendant you guys need to watch your language…. But let me leave you with this… life is like toilet paper because you are either on a roll or you are taking shit from some asshole… with that I will ask you three to be quiet.
Schizo Shep: I haven’t even said anything…
Crazy J: Damn it shep you always have to take it to far
Cash: Well Fuck Shep… Shut it up.
the three laugh as the flight attendant walks off. J looks at his phone and flips through 100s of picture of him and Lisa… the guys notice and they seem to understand that they have to play along like she is real or it could be what sends J over the deep end. J then looks at the WCF webpage at his opponets.
Crazy J: Lester the molester… we seen firsthand how useless he is. I am not worried about this guy at all…. He will not stand a chance against me or anyone else in this match… honestly puzzle jesus does not belong in this match.
Schizo Shep: Puzzle Jesus and cock cage… haha those two fucks are lucky they had Gemini as a partner… and guys I am…
Crazy J: Bro Lester last promo last week was so bad I hope the WCF network took even more time away I would hate to see the WCF network to lose ratings over it or hell kill people with his stupid shit… I had some fans stop me on the way to arena and they was like… what the fuck was he talking about and I replied I don’t know I don’t drink from Karma cum fountain. Oh hey I pooped my pants in the elevator the other day… I be taking this shit to a whole new level. My sources told me that Lester use to work at the sperm bank but he got fired?
Cash: fur what?
Crazy J: For drinking on the job… Karma vagina is the only thing in this world that has drank more cum them him. Hey what does Lester and Bishop have in common with an ambulance?
Schizo Shep: I can’t wait to hear this…What?
Crazy J: they both go WHOO-WHOO and they both get loaded from the backside… booom…. Best joke of the day. But I am not saying Lester is gay but his boyfriend is. You see last week Bishop said my promo was all gay jokes… but I had Lisa watch it and she said only 10% of it was actual gay jokes… that means it was 90%gay free and that makes it mostly gay friendly. I got to go take a Doc Henry real quick!
Crazy J stands up and walks to the back of the jet and the camera stays with them. Shep looks over at the flight attendant.
Schizo Shep: I would love to join the mile high club with her… Fuck I would be tagging that ass daily and twice on Sunday… fuck I bet that monkey looks good.
the fasten seatbelt light comes on and the jet shakes a little. Crazy J is walking back as Cash and Shep are talking to each other… J sits down and he has an odd look on his face.
Crazy J: I fucking hit my head in the bathroom trying to take that shit… So where was I before I announced I needed to shit. Oh yes Doc Henry. I watched your promo while I was taking a shit and you just like everyone wants to call me and ICP lookalike… but that’s funny I don’t have dreads, I don’t paint my face like a clown and I am not spraying faygo pop… I got that name because every was always saying Jay is crazy… that crazy ass Jay and eventually it got to be Crazy J… but it has nothing to do with The clowns from me home state. You say I am still green… mother fucker what you talking about… I have already had a main event match and I have defeated the current hardcore champ and have a win over the peoples champ… hell I pushed Gemini to his limit and to be honest I think if we had a second go at it ZT would win. When your top champion gives me credit for being a bad ass… then you have to realize that I am someone. But hey think I am just a jobber that doesn’t matter because this jobber isn’t afraid to kick your ass and prove you wrong it is what I do. But then you say that you have a couple of monsters and if ZMac is a monseter then I am a monster killer because that guy has already fallen to me and this week won’t be no different. Then you talked about puzzle jesus and I am sorry but being fat and wearing a mask doesn’t make you a monster it makes you a fucking loser… I am sexy and I wear face paint much different… I am not chasing lisa… we are getting married you stupid fuck…
Schizo Shep: what else did the dumb ass say bro?
Cash: boy he done woke up the crazy one… get tem
Crazy J: he was playing with wood and he talked about my wood and how he would touch it and shape it and how awesome it would be… some type of freak… he must be from green bay because he seems to be a packer… he thinks he can make me a better me and he is on the track and going somewhere that fucker thinks he get in my mind and take me to a dark place… fucker has no idea how fucked up I am and how his level of darkness, crazy or hardcore doesn’t even come close. I am not really sure what he wants me to do second guess and say that my victories so far don’t mean shit but I have beaten some of the best around here. Doc I am sure you will get a title someday but for now this isn’t going to be your match. You and Puzzle Jesus will bother struggle in this match its really a 3-way match with two douchebags thrown in for us to beat on. Oh and that train you here is going to lie to you… when you say I think I can… I think I can know that you can’t… I am taking that title and I am not on a train I am not on a roll I am just better then you and the other boys trying to make it.
Cash: where is the drink cart girl?
Crazy J: Guys when we land I want to go out and see the sting rays they are so awesome well… that’s what lisa said… I told her I would check it out for her because we might be coming back for our honeymoon… Shep dog why you so quiet.
Schizo Shep: sorry man I was thinking about the match…
Crazy J: Look man let it go its not good to hold in but look When it comes to the ring or life I want you to know I trust you with my life… We are the brothers in paint and the freekshow and Zero tolerance is strong... Look man in life I don’t have many friend because I don’t trust people it comes with who I am… but I trust you enough to consider you my best friend… I wanted to wait to ask this but really I think it is best to just ask it now… Shep would you be willing to be my best man at the wedding?
Schizo Shep: Bro but what about your long time tag partners Jaymz and Scott Master? What about Cash?
Crazy J: Well to be honest Shep… Jaymz and Scott have not been very supportive of me and lisa and they don’t support me like you do they seem to really have changed a lot but then again maybe it was me that changed but if I changed I changed for the better. But I am about to release this monster inside of me this week and show everyone why I am Crazy J.
Schizo Shep: bro it would be my honor.
Crazy J: so cash… look man I can only have one best man but I would like you to fill a roll as one of the important parts of the ceremony. I want you to know I will pay for your tux as I know your redneck ass doesn’t have one… but look I want you to walk down with lisa Niece… Lisa hasn’t stopped talking about her and how much she loves her…. But I would like you to be the ring bearer will you carry the heart pillow and rings.
Cash: Da Fuck…. Aint no child
Crazy J: Well Maybe you can sleep on it… Well I am going to get some shut eye it will be sun up and time to go as soon as we land.
Crazy J closes his eyes and Cash just glares at him and shep closes his eyes
and cash flags down an attendant and gets a drink coming his way and then he to closes his eyes. The scene flashes out and the three men are seen walking out of the airport and J and Shep have changed into board shorts and zt tank tops and Cash is wearing Jeans a cowboy hat and shirt and three guys walk out of the airport and they have a porter that is pushing a cart with their bag and black suburban pulls up and the guys get in and they tip the porter after he loads their bags. The guys look over and you can see a carnival cruise ship out in the ocean and a Disney cruise ship. The guys pull up to a building and they get out J goes in and the guys follow him and J comes out with a bathing suit for Cash but he doesn’t want to put it on but he finely goes and puts it on and he comes out with long white socks on that the shorts come down and cover it’s a Budweiser suit and he still has his cowboy hat and shirt on. They get back in the vehicle and they reach the swimming with the sting rays excursion point and they get on the ship and so do some sexy girls they head out
Cash: Why do we have to go in the water?
Crazy J: keep this up and you wont be my ring bearer anymore… this is my last guy weekend because in just a few short weekends I will be married and starting a family. Guys lets have fun they sell bear on the boat when it leaves.
Cash: I am good then I guess
The guys interact with each other as they drink some of the ladies mix in with them and they seem to be having fun the boat reaches the famous sand bar and they get off the boat Cash removes his shirt but leaves his hat on and J walks up behind him and rubs a shrimp on his back they get in the water and a sting ray comes towards them J feeds it a piece and it circles around and it stats sucking on Cash back and he freaks out the tour guide tells him to stop before it stings him… Cash gets pissed when it lets go he storms back on the ship and he changes back into his jeans and J and Shep continue to look at the animals. They get back on the boat and they have a few drinks waiting for others to finish they are drinking rum punch and the scene fades out as the boat speeds off Cash still looks angry.
the scene cuts back in and they stop at a bank and Crazy J gets out and he brings in a duffel bag with him and he comes back out with a huge smile he jumps in.
Crazy J: I am taking care of some business here but guys I want you to know each of you have a cayman island bank account… but we will talk more later lets hit the beach.
Cash: I am not changing into shorts again.
Schizo Shep: be hot then bro
Crazy J: Doc Henry and Puzzle Jesus suck more than that sting ray thank god other wise Cash would have a huge hickey on his back...
Schizo Shep: But what about the zombie and the big monster?
Crazy J: I look forward to facing two of the monster in this place. but you see when it comes to monster I had the biggest monster in the world for my tag partner I watched him destroy people and Jaymz loved it. But hey Cash I was just fucking with you I want you to be a groomsman in my wedding.
Cash accepts and then J and Shep quickly fix their face paint from being in the ocean they both rush as they get closer to the beach… probably the worst face paint job they have ever done. They reach the beach and they head out and as they walk they run across a group of girls Shep is walking behind looking all around still taking it all in.
Crazy J: so cash you’re a redneck you should know this one were do you get virgin wool from… Ugly sheep … get it fucker.
One of the flight attendants come over and she looks over at Cash and she looks down at his rebel Flag belt buckle.
Cash: So man..you like my sumbitchin belt buckle? It's look might fine with yer forehead on it neath it
Crazy J: I am sorry he is a little slow... but if you was a tree my boy cash would be a squirrel and he would store his nuts in you… but hey lady… did you hear about the blind whore? Well you got to hand it to her… get it because she blind you have to put your dick in her hand… Why aren’t you laughing… damn it we got us another stuck up cunt.
Flight attendant you guys need to watch your language…. But let me leave you with this… life is like toilet paper because you are either on a roll or you are taking shit from some asshole… with that I will ask you three to be quiet.
Schizo Shep: I haven’t even said anything…
Crazy J: Damn it shep you always have to take it to far
Cash: Well Fuck Shep… Shut it up.
the three laugh as the flight attendant walks off. J looks at his phone and flips through 100s of picture of him and Lisa… the guys notice and they seem to understand that they have to play along like she is real or it could be what sends J over the deep end. J then looks at the WCF webpage at his opponets.
Crazy J: Lester the molester… we seen firsthand how useless he is. I am not worried about this guy at all…. He will not stand a chance against me or anyone else in this match… honestly puzzle jesus does not belong in this match.
Schizo Shep: Puzzle Jesus and cock cage… haha those two fucks are lucky they had Gemini as a partner… and guys I am…
Crazy J: Bro Lester last promo last week was so bad I hope the WCF network took even more time away I would hate to see the WCF network to lose ratings over it or hell kill people with his stupid shit… I had some fans stop me on the way to arena and they was like… what the fuck was he talking about and I replied I don’t know I don’t drink from Karma cum fountain. Oh hey I pooped my pants in the elevator the other day… I be taking this shit to a whole new level. My sources told me that Lester use to work at the sperm bank but he got fired?
Cash: fur what?
Crazy J: For drinking on the job… Karma vagina is the only thing in this world that has drank more cum them him. Hey what does Lester and Bishop have in common with an ambulance?
Schizo Shep: I can’t wait to hear this…What?
Crazy J: they both go WHOO-WHOO and they both get loaded from the backside… booom…. Best joke of the day. But I am not saying Lester is gay but his boyfriend is. You see last week Bishop said my promo was all gay jokes… but I had Lisa watch it and she said only 10% of it was actual gay jokes… that means it was 90%gay free and that makes it mostly gay friendly. I got to go take a Doc Henry real quick!
Crazy J stands up and walks to the back of the jet and the camera stays with them. Shep looks over at the flight attendant.
Schizo Shep: I would love to join the mile high club with her… Fuck I would be tagging that ass daily and twice on Sunday… fuck I bet that monkey looks good.
the fasten seatbelt light comes on and the jet shakes a little. Crazy J is walking back as Cash and Shep are talking to each other… J sits down and he has an odd look on his face.
Crazy J: I fucking hit my head in the bathroom trying to take that shit… So where was I before I announced I needed to shit. Oh yes Doc Henry. I watched your promo while I was taking a shit and you just like everyone wants to call me and ICP lookalike… but that’s funny I don’t have dreads, I don’t paint my face like a clown and I am not spraying faygo pop… I got that name because every was always saying Jay is crazy… that crazy ass Jay and eventually it got to be Crazy J… but it has nothing to do with The clowns from me home state. You say I am still green… mother fucker what you talking about… I have already had a main event match and I have defeated the current hardcore champ and have a win over the peoples champ… hell I pushed Gemini to his limit and to be honest I think if we had a second go at it ZT would win. When your top champion gives me credit for being a bad ass… then you have to realize that I am someone. But hey think I am just a jobber that doesn’t matter because this jobber isn’t afraid to kick your ass and prove you wrong it is what I do. But then you say that you have a couple of monsters and if ZMac is a monseter then I am a monster killer because that guy has already fallen to me and this week won’t be no different. Then you talked about puzzle jesus and I am sorry but being fat and wearing a mask doesn’t make you a monster it makes you a fucking loser… I am sexy and I wear face paint much different… I am not chasing lisa… we are getting married you stupid fuck…
Schizo Shep: what else did the dumb ass say bro?
Cash: boy he done woke up the crazy one… get tem
Crazy J: he was playing with wood and he talked about my wood and how he would touch it and shape it and how awesome it would be… some type of freak… he must be from green bay because he seems to be a packer… he thinks he can make me a better me and he is on the track and going somewhere that fucker thinks he get in my mind and take me to a dark place… fucker has no idea how fucked up I am and how his level of darkness, crazy or hardcore doesn’t even come close. I am not really sure what he wants me to do second guess and say that my victories so far don’t mean shit but I have beaten some of the best around here. Doc I am sure you will get a title someday but for now this isn’t going to be your match. You and Puzzle Jesus will bother struggle in this match its really a 3-way match with two douchebags thrown in for us to beat on. Oh and that train you here is going to lie to you… when you say I think I can… I think I can know that you can’t… I am taking that title and I am not on a train I am not on a roll I am just better then you and the other boys trying to make it.
Cash: where is the drink cart girl?
Crazy J: Guys when we land I want to go out and see the sting rays they are so awesome well… that’s what lisa said… I told her I would check it out for her because we might be coming back for our honeymoon… Shep dog why you so quiet.
Schizo Shep: sorry man I was thinking about the match…
Crazy J: Look man let it go its not good to hold in but look When it comes to the ring or life I want you to know I trust you with my life… We are the brothers in paint and the freekshow and Zero tolerance is strong... Look man in life I don’t have many friend because I don’t trust people it comes with who I am… but I trust you enough to consider you my best friend… I wanted to wait to ask this but really I think it is best to just ask it now… Shep would you be willing to be my best man at the wedding?
Schizo Shep: Bro but what about your long time tag partners Jaymz and Scott Master? What about Cash?
Crazy J: Well to be honest Shep… Jaymz and Scott have not been very supportive of me and lisa and they don’t support me like you do they seem to really have changed a lot but then again maybe it was me that changed but if I changed I changed for the better. But I am about to release this monster inside of me this week and show everyone why I am Crazy J.
Schizo Shep: bro it would be my honor.
Crazy J: so cash… look man I can only have one best man but I would like you to fill a roll as one of the important parts of the ceremony. I want you to know I will pay for your tux as I know your redneck ass doesn’t have one… but look I want you to walk down with lisa Niece… Lisa hasn’t stopped talking about her and how much she loves her…. But I would like you to be the ring bearer will you carry the heart pillow and rings.
Cash: Da Fuck…. Aint no child
Crazy J: Well Maybe you can sleep on it… Well I am going to get some shut eye it will be sun up and time to go as soon as we land.
Crazy J closes his eyes and Cash just glares at him and shep closes his eyes
and cash flags down an attendant and gets a drink coming his way and then he to closes his eyes. The scene flashes out and the three men are seen walking out of the airport and J and Shep have changed into board shorts and zt tank tops and Cash is wearing Jeans a cowboy hat and shirt and three guys walk out of the airport and they have a porter that is pushing a cart with their bag and black suburban pulls up and the guys get in and they tip the porter after he loads their bags. The guys look over and you can see a carnival cruise ship out in the ocean and a Disney cruise ship. The guys pull up to a building and they get out J goes in and the guys follow him and J comes out with a bathing suit for Cash but he doesn’t want to put it on but he finely goes and puts it on and he comes out with long white socks on that the shorts come down and cover it’s a Budweiser suit and he still has his cowboy hat and shirt on. They get back in the vehicle and they reach the swimming with the sting rays excursion point and they get on the ship and so do some sexy girls they head out
Cash: Why do we have to go in the water?
Crazy J: keep this up and you wont be my ring bearer anymore… this is my last guy weekend because in just a few short weekends I will be married and starting a family. Guys lets have fun they sell bear on the boat when it leaves.
Cash: I am good then I guess
The guys interact with each other as they drink some of the ladies mix in with them and they seem to be having fun the boat reaches the famous sand bar and they get off the boat Cash removes his shirt but leaves his hat on and J walks up behind him and rubs a shrimp on his back they get in the water and a sting ray comes towards them J feeds it a piece and it circles around and it stats sucking on Cash back and he freaks out the tour guide tells him to stop before it stings him… Cash gets pissed when it lets go he storms back on the ship and he changes back into his jeans and J and Shep continue to look at the animals. They get back on the boat and they have a few drinks waiting for others to finish they are drinking rum punch and the scene fades out as the boat speeds off Cash still looks angry.
the scene cuts back in and they stop at a bank and Crazy J gets out and he brings in a duffel bag with him and he comes back out with a huge smile he jumps in.
Crazy J: I am taking care of some business here but guys I want you to know each of you have a cayman island bank account… but we will talk more later lets hit the beach.
Cash: I am not changing into shorts again.
Schizo Shep: be hot then bro
Crazy J: Doc Henry and Puzzle Jesus suck more than that sting ray thank god other wise Cash would have a huge hickey on his back...
Schizo Shep: But what about the zombie and the big monster?
Crazy J: I look forward to facing two of the monster in this place. but you see when it comes to monster I had the biggest monster in the world for my tag partner I watched him destroy people and Jaymz loved it. But hey Cash I was just fucking with you I want you to be a groomsman in my wedding.
Cash accepts and then J and Shep quickly fix their face paint from being in the ocean they both rush as they get closer to the beach… probably the worst face paint job they have ever done. They reach the beach and they head out and as they walk they run across a group of girls Shep is walking behind looking all around still taking it all in.
