Lilith & Skittlez Go To McDonalds
Aug 25, 2016 23:01:29 GMT -5
Oblivion, Sarah Twilight, and 2 more like this
Post by Lilith on Aug 25, 2016 23:01:29 GMT -5
August 23rd 2016
Newark, New Jersey
7:13PM EST
When Lilith had first met Skittlez she did not like him, she didn’t tend to like a lot of people… unless they were her Sare Bear… or her FORMER Sare Bear, whatever she wanted to call herself nowadays. However after ignoring his silly little tweets and getting past his weird, almost scary appearance… Lilith had actually started to like him a little bit! And she knew that he would be her bestest friend for all eternity when he had brought her to her favorite restaurant in the whole entire world… McDonalds! The happifullest place in the world! The place where you got super awesome toys with your meal, could drink milkshakes, eat cookies and even yell at the staff if you felt like it. This place was like HEAVEN for Lilith.
Lilith and Skittlez arrive at the golden arches in his 1991 Geo, that looked a lot like a taxi because it was yellow. He felt really bad about taking her to such a cheap date on their first one and was about to apologize for his lack of money. But then Lilith’s eyes went big and she became super excited as they approached. Somehow, luck was on his side right now because what would be a nightmare date for any other woman, seemed to be perfect for Lilith.
Lilith grinned big as she looked out of her passenger side window at all the people coming out of the restaurant with balloons, toys and god only knows what else. She literally began to bounce up and down in her seat with excitement as Skittlez parked up.
Lilith: Oh my god… OH MY GOD… OH MY GOD!!! YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! I am sooooooooo excited for this!!! This is like the bestest date EVER!!! Usually I’d have to get all dressed up and wear clothes I wouldn't usually wear and go to these weird little places WHERE THEY DON’T EVEN GIVE YOU TOYS!!! But this?! This is just… OH MY GOD!!!
Lilith looked at the happy meal poster seeing that the toys they were giving the children/Lilith today were little dog ones which were super awesomely made toy versions of the dogs in that new dog movie which Lilith had been asking Sarah to take her to for so long… which she never had, the meanie!
Lilith: I WANT THAT ONE!!!
Skittlez looked over at what Lilith was pointing at and smiled
Skittlez: I gotchu boo. Whatever you want, dat shit is yours. You want dat puppy? You got it babi.
Skittlez got out of the car and trying to be a gentleman, he walked around and opened the door for Lilith. They WERE still in Newark, so you couldn’t say there were a lot of friendly people around. And even if there were, they’d have still been staring at the couple as people were now. To see this goofy looking white guy opening the car door for a stunning brunette as if they’d just pulled up to a five star restaurant was …. Very odd. Even weirder was Lilith’s reaction as if she WAS at such a classy place.
The two of them made their way inside and although Lilith already knew which toy she wanted, there was still the formality of figuring out which food she wanted with said toy. Skittlez opened his wallet and pulls out the $20 he had and prepared for them to order. Unable to contain her excitement any longer, Lilith jumped up onto the counter at the front of the restaurant and proceeded to grab hold of the nearby microphone which she somehow knew how to operate.
Lilith: Ummmmmm, yes… hello? Yes! Hi! My names Lilith, but you can call me Lilo for short anddddddd I’ll be ordering a happy meal today! Thanks!!!
One of the nearby workers looked over at the brunette as she continued to talk into the microphone. Totally jealous that she was doing so the worker attempted to push Lilith away but Lilith was having none of it!
Worker: Ummmmm, excuse me Miss but you aren’t allowed to use that…
Lilith: Hey! HEY!!! Shut up! I’m not even done yet! My…. ummmmms… date… hasn’t ordered yet AND I still haven’t even told you what toy I want!!!
Worker: Miss please get down so I can take your order…
Lilith: Nah ah! The magic microphone does all the work, you just stand there and look pretty! Anywayzzzzzzzzz…
Growing tired of Lilith not listening to her the worker stupidly attempted to put her hands on Lilith to push her down… or whatever it was she was trying to do. But doing this was not a good idea as Lilith grabbed her arm, hard, and pushed her into the ice cream machine sending sprinkles flying all over the place. Lilith just rolled her eyes at the girl as she looked back down at the microphone she still had in her other hand.
Lilith: Silly girl! What would Mistah McDonald say with you putting your hands on your number one and BESTEST IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD customer?! Anywayzzzzzzz before I was so rudely interrupted… as I was saying… I’ll takes the doggy with the brown tail andddddd what do you want, Mistah Rainbow Bear?
Skittlez was now trying to do damage control as the manager made his way out from the back and was likely going to throw them out of the restaurant for Lilith’s actions. So Skittlez calmly got Lilith to step away from the counter by promising he’d get her two of the toys. The manager didn’t look happy but Skittlez had an idea to calm things down.
Skittlez: Yo, like we sorry bout dat … she just got dun havin’ like … an MRI an’ shit… yeah dat’s what it was. So she ain’t got her senses ya know?
Luckily, the manager did a lot of work with Ronald McDonald house for sick children and had some sympathy for the bullshit story. He allows them to stay, and the girl who was originally going to take their order goes to the back, not wanting to deal with Lilith.
Skittlez: Alright so lemme have a quarter pounder with cheese meal, large dat shit. And mah dime piece here wants a happy meal, with that dog right there. Gimmie two of the toys yo.
Manager: What kind of happy meal?
Skittlez: Uhhh … yo boo, what you want in dat happy meal? Nuggets? Cheeseburger?
Lilith wasn’t paying any attention at all, she had been sitting there super confused since Skittlez had just called her what he had just called her. She eventually looked up at her tag team partner still with a puzzled look on her face.
Lilith: Ummmmmms… Candy Man… whats a dime piece? Isn’t that like… not very much moneys? Sooooooo like… thats not very nice to call me that! I should be a dollar piece at the very least!!!
Skittlez himself was confused at first … but then he realized where her confusion was at. He smiled and shook his head and tried to explain it.
Skittlez: Nah boo, it’s like when you rate someone on a scale of 1 to 10. A dime piece is a ten boo, it means you smokin’ hot babi.
Lilith still didn’t really understand what he was saying, cos of all that white bear / black bear confusion stuffs but she recognized the words “smokin’ hot” and this made her smile, big. The manager however was starting to look quite impatient.
Lilith: Ohhhhhhhh okayz, thanks! It means sooooooooo much to me to be complimented by a skittle.
Lilith gave him a sweet look as she looked back up at the manager with big eyes.
Lilith: What are you still doing here? I should have got my doggies like thirty minutes ago! I tells you this service is super terrible!
Manager: Ermmmm, I am waiting for you to tell me what food you’d like, Ma’am.
Lilith looked confused… again.
Lilith: What food do you think I want? Imma get TWO dogs! I want dog food! Duhhhhhh!!!
Skittlez steps in one more time, to get the order going.
Skittlez: Give us the McNuggets meal a’ight? And uh … gimmie a plain burger no bun too.
The manager now looked at Skittlez confused. Skittlez nodded his head assuring him he knew what he was doing. He ordered the burger so that Lilith could at least believe she was feeding the toy dogs, and it would make sure she got to eat her own happy meal. The order was placed.
Manager: That’s $18.93
Skittlez pays and it leaves him $1.07 left but it was worth it because his date was happy.
Before Skittlez could turn around to see where Lilith had disappeared to the brunette had run off to go and jump into the nearby ball pool, sending balls and children flying out of the pit. Lilith proceeded to throw a few balls as hard as she possibly could at a few of the remaining kids until they too left and she had declared the area to be hers.
Lilith: Skittlez! Hey! Over here! We gots the bestest seats in the house right there! Come join me!
Lilith called him over wondering whether or not he would actually do so, had this been Sarah with her she definitely wouldn’t and would have been mean to Lilith just for being in there by herself. Sarah didn’t like McDonalds very much, a thing Lilith had NEVER understood.
Skittlez shook his head and laughed as he saw his date in the ball pit. The manager again didn’t look pleased but some fake sad eyes from Skittlez as a reminder of the “MRI” and he let it slide. Skittlez got their order and brought it over to the closest table he could find to the ball pit and called out to Lilith.
Skittlez: C’mawn babi let’s eat dis food while it hot and den we can have as much fun as you want. I gotcha doggies here waitin’ for ya.
Lilith looks up at Skittlez and then back down at the brightly colored balls which were clearly way more fun than sitting in the boring area he was in.
Lilith: Nopes!!! You gots to get in here with me! We gotta work as a team now Mistah Fruity… we gots a big match coming up and I just KNOWS my Sare Bear will take me back if I do goods in it.
Skittlez shrugged and collected the tray of food as he climbed into the ball pit with Lilith.
Skittlez: A’ight, we eat here den.
He handed her the happy meal and her drink so they could eat and she could still have fun. Lilith looks over at the weird looking confused skittle with a tear in her eye.
Lilith: You knows, I didn’t actually expect you to come sit in here with me… I just wanted to see if you actually would cos no one has ever done so before… not Sare Bear, not Logi, not Obi Bear… no ones…
Lilith paused for a moment.
Lilith: Hmmmmmm… Skittlez, I wanna ask you a question and you gots to pinky promise that you won’t get upset and cry and run away okayz?
Skittlez looked very confused now as to why she would pose a question like dat. But, she took his back when no one else would and so sitting in a ball pit with her was no big deal. He nodded his head and listened.
Skittlez: Sure thing boo, what’s you got?
Lilith: Ummmmms… like… I knows you’ve been in WCF for like sooooooooo long, right? I means I remember watching a match of yours when I was with my Sare Bear YEARS ago. But like… you NEVER won a match, right? So like… it gots me thinking and like… do you even knows how to wrestle? Tis nothing to be ashamed of, Skittlez… I never knew how to wrestle either until my Sare Bear taught me. She was a SUPER good teacher too. Sooooo I was thinking since I’m your tag team partner this week and we gots to impress the bossy boots red fur… you wants me to teach you how to go grrrrrr mode so we can take down that candy shop? All we’d need is a box of cookies and a couple of cartoons… on DVD!
Skittlez looked down, again knowing that he’d been nothing but a joke in WCF. He sighed a bit and then looked back at her.
Skittlez: A’ight listen boo. I ain’t stupid ya feel? I know I was made ya partna because I dun lost every match I ever had. Hell I ain’t even know peeps did interviews up in dis bitch until you showed me dat. Ain’t nobody ever asked me about no match, cuz I ain’t never had no shot of winnin’ one. But dis time I gots a shot and dat shot is you. I ain’t gon’ let you down either boo. If Sarah gots beef wit you, den we gon’ handle it an’ shut dat biyotch up when we victorious an’ shit.
Lilith: Hmmmmm… okayz good. I wanna teach you something my Sare Bear always used to say to me when she was teaching me how to go grrrrrrrr mode. Nope, nope… I dont means “Stop looking down my top and pay attention, Lilith!” though she did say that a lot! She was super yummy when she gots all sweaty… how can you blame me? What Imma talking about is… after I’d do the training and the running and all that stuffs she’d get me to do… before the cookie eating, most important part by the way! She’d pull me aside and look me dead in the eyes and be all like… Lilith when you gets into the ring you gots to remember one thing… it isn’t about what you do with these…
Lilith lifted up her paws and showed them to Skittlez quickly before throwing them back down into the ball pit.
Lilith: ...its all about what you gots here!
Lilith placed her finger down against Skittlez chest with a nice, encouraging smile.
Lilith: I dunno really what she meant by that, or if it ever even really happened… but I figures she was just saying I had nice boobs! Soooooooo what Imma saying is… if on Sunday we gets… or you gets beaten down bad all you gots to do is show them your boobs, okayz? It’ll work great!
Lilith looked down at her dogs which she was now feeding hamburger meat to.
Lilith: Does that help at all?
Skittlez listened on as Lilith talked and he understood what the message was supposed to be. In fact he got hyped up about it. Lilith’s pep talk really set him off.
Skittlez: I gotchu, we gots dis boo. Ain’t nobody gots more heart. They might be lookin’ unstoppable and our victory improbable but ain’t nothin’ impossible what they gon’ say when they get toppled yo?
Skittlez started one of his raps again which made Lilith giggle since she never understood anything he said when he talked that way. So he stopped rapping after a few short lines and just enjoys seeing Lilith smile.
Lilith: You talk soooooo funny! Hahaha! Anywayz listens, Mistah Skittle Bear… you know anything about our opponents? I’m not gonna lie… I sat down with a DVD and some popcorn and tried to study them just like Sare Bear always taught me to do before a match but I gots super distracted by their manager girl… she’s soooooooooo yummy!!! The things I’d do to her… let me tells you! So anywayz yeah… I didn’t really learn a lot aside from what bra size she was… which I am SUPER good at guessing by the way!
Skittlez thought about it a minute and I mean, he knew this crazy chick was like bisexual so it was actually cool as shit they could talk about how hot some other chick was. But this needed to be business because Skittlez had only this one shot. And it wasn’t even about himself anymore, he wanted to impress his tag team partner.
Skittlez: Yo, all I knows is dat dis Drake Knight is a big ass brick house. Homie’s like three hundred pounds an’ shit … and his partner Ice, she’s like the female version of him, but uglier. So yo check it, if we just look at da ugly bitch, we gots dis cuz who don’t wanna smack da shit outta some ugly bitch ya feel me?
Yet again Lilith wasn’t fully paying attention. She had completely tuned out when she realized who… or what she’d be facing this week.
Lilith: Wait… wait wait wait wait WAIT!!! Are you tellings me that my former Sare Bear put me in a tag match with a talking skittle and we’ll be facing a house?! Like… an actual house?! How does Sare Bear expect me to beat that!
Lilith paused to think about it for a moment.
Lilith: Ummmmm… unless we get like a bulldozer thinggy and maybe a rocket launcher and some other kinda guns and just blow it up til its collapsed…
Yet again she paused and then a massive smile spread across her face, Lilith was extremely happiful with herself.
Lilith: Wait! I got it… you said it was a house, right? Like… as in the three little pigs?! Alls we need is a wolf! Those things blown down houses no problem! ...unless they’re made out of bricks. Stupid pigs! What sort of pig builds a brick house!
Skittlez had his jaw wide open as Lilith spoke. He was mesmerized at the fact she was taking this so very literally. So he tried to steer her back in the right direction.
Skittlez: Nah nah boo. He ain’t actually a house. It’s like a expression an’ shit. It means he real big and like full of pure muscle an’ shit. An’ like, he gots dis ugly ass bitch as his partna. So like, we just gotta only look at da ugly bitch an’ we’ll win cuz seein’ ugly bitches make me mad an’ shit I dunno boutchu.
Lilith nodded her head clearly pretending that she knew EXACTLY what he had just said to her.
Lilith: Hmmmmm… you knows, I knows these big muscle bears are supposed to be all grrrrrrrrr and scary and stuffs but they don’t usually do too good against me. Like theres this one called Obi Bear… I dunno if you’ve heard of him or not… but anywayz he’s all grrrrrr and WHAM CRASH BANG and stuffs and he’s all like… look at me! I’m all big and strong and grrrrr! But I’m just like… NOPE!!! And bopped him on the head and sent him night night and put him back in the toy box. Sooooooo Imma imagine that this bear is no different to Obi Bear… except this one probably gots candy in his pockets and stuffs cos hes from the Candy Shop, right? So I wouldn’t worry about him too much, Skittle face. As for his pretty… and ugly little bitch bears… you go grrrrrrrrr mode cos of that ones ugly little face and I’ll go outside of the ring to deal with Kandi.
Lilith slyly winked at Skittlez, once again her mind was in a dirty place.
Lilith: As they say… once you’ve got black, you don’t go back! Sooooo Imma soooooo paint my nails black that night!
Skittlez looked dumbfounded as Lilith made her dirty comments.
Skittlez: I dunno what the shit you just said but fuck it, it sounded sexy as fuck anyway. Don’ even worry about dat Kandi bitch yo, yous wayyyyyy more smokin’ hot than her. Yous gotta be careful wit dem blonde bitches. Dey usually gots all air in dey heads an’ shit.
Considering he was talking to a brunette with the mentality of a 10 year old, that blonde statement didn’t exactly hold much weight. But in any case, he was trying to compliment and psyche up his partner … and there was probably a bunch of flirting involved too. Because let’s face it, how many times in Skittlez’ lifetime was he ever gonna be this close to a chick who looked like Lilith? Probably never again.
For the past minute or so Lilith had been busy laughing as loud as she possibly could. The thought of bubble gum blondes really did make her laugh… even if they were super hot and yummy.
Lilith: Hahahahahaha!!! Oh my god bear don’t even get me started on bubble gums! This one time, right? I knew this bubble gum and I ended up turning her into a robot! It was great! You should have been there, Skittle Bear! Hahahahaha!!!
At this point the manager came over because some of the mothers of the children who were forced out of the play area by Lilith had complained. He informed Lilith and Skittlez that they had to leave the children’s play area. Skittlez nodded and understood. He tried to coax Lilith to leave as well and he would take her back to her room and drop her off but Lilith was having none of it and had no intentions of moving… especially not because some greasy little nerd was asking her to. Instead she sat there and started throwing balls at the man, bouncing them off of his head making him get even angrier with her.
Manager: Ma’am, if you don’t leave we will have to call the authorties.
Lilith: Pffffffft! Sare Bear?! Fine! Call her! I don’t care! She won’t do anything EVERYONE knows that! Besides even if she did come here which I knows she won't… she’d just end up taking me back when I take her down into this here ball pool thinggy! We never did do it in here…
One of the mothers covered her childs ears as Lilith continued talking about how she’d rape her now boss in the ball pit. Skittlez however looked a mix between uncomfortable and turned on and Lilith found this very very funny. The manager turned around and headed off to call the police. Skittlez was now completely worried about the situation.
Skittlez: Boo we gots to go. I can’t be gettin’ locked up and neither can you. How we’s gon’ win and impress your Sare Bear if we’s locked up boo?
Lilith rolled her eyes as she stood up from the colorful balls below her, picking up the biggest shiniest red one.
Lilith: Okay fine but I’m taking this! Kick me out of this place will they! Pffffffffft! They’d be NOTHING without me! I mades them! Carried their name when they were busy sitting at home and doing nothing! For years now its all been me… me me me! And what do they do?! Just turn their backs on me the first chance they get… I loved her and this is what she does to me?! How could she do this…
Several tears began to roll down Liliths face as she was clearly no longer talking about the McDonalds Skittlez had been busy trying to lead her out of.
Lilith: Why doesn’t she love me like I love her, Skittlez?
Lilith wiped a few of her tears away as more quickly followed them. Skittlez lead her out to his hoopty and opened the door for her to get in. He didn’t like seeing her upset but they had to split, so he jumped in and revved the engine as they peeled out from the Mickey D’s.
Skittlez: Yo don’ you worry babi. She ain’t gon’ have no CHOICE but to take ya back when we dun’ git ours. Bust a cap in dey ass and walk out on top. Make her take notice boo!
Lilith wiped a few more of her tears away as she looked over at Skittlez, who was busy trying to cheer her up. It was odd having a friend who wasn’t mistreating her, telling her to make him a hotdog or trying to rape her.
Lilith: You’re right, Skittlez! First thing Imma do after I’ve beaten these idiotic little bears on Sunday is march right into Sare Bears office… tell her how I just gots done raping that blonde furred bear, Kandi… and ask her if she's jealous. And then… THEN!!! If she says no Imma call her a liar and then… well… I guess we’ll just see what happens then. But the important thing is… I won’t have imagined it AND I will hopefully get my own way… cos I’m Lilith and Lilith ALWAYS gets what she wants… usually!
Eventually the car made it’s way to Lilith’s hotel and Skittlez pulled it up to the front. He looked over at her and smiled, knowing they were now focused on the task at hand and Lilith was ready to make things right in her life.
Skittlez: Yo, don’ worry boo. Imma not let you down. Imma be up at the arena e’ryday trainin’ an’ shit. We gots dis like fo’ rills we do.
Skittlez gets out of the car and again opens the door for Lilith, knowing that aside from Sunday, this would probably be the last time he ever saw her.
Skittlez: Yo gots ta do you boo. Yo’ Sare Bear ain’t gonna have no otha option but to take notice when we handle our bidniss ya feel me?
Lilith knew that this was probably one of the last times she would ever see the weirdo rapper bear too. It actually made her quite sad to think about this because aside from the asshole manager telling them to leave for no reason, this was probably the best night out Lilith had been on in a long long time. She gave him a final concerned look.
Lilith: Ummmmmms… you knows after our match on Sunday… what will you do? Cos… even if Sare Bear is proved to be wrong and just bad mood bearing for no reason about you and me… I don’t think she’ll keep you on here. She doesn’t tend to be too nice and happiful like that… especially not since I’m not with her anymore. She's probably turned into like Darth Sarah or something by now she's so grumpy and miserable and stuffs! You gonna be okayz, Mistah Fruity?
Skittlez sighed thinking about it. He knew that after this match he was probably going back down to enhancement talent status, or worse … unemployed. But he held his chin up and just took it as it was.
Skittlez: I be a’ight … sheeeeeet, I always do me. Ya know, sumpin’ sumpin’ gots ta happen. Maybe da labels catch me on live T.V. ya know? Next thing I gots a record deal. Like I said, dis my shot an’ I’m goin’ all in boo. Don’ worry bout me.
Lilith nodded her head trying her hardest to give her new friend a smile whilst she was holding back the tears.
Lilith: Mmhmmmm… I… I, ummmmm… I want you to have something.
Lilith reached down into her bra and rummaged around down there for several moments until she brought her hand back up and out holding a little multi colored bear. It was about six inches big and had white fur with multi colored dots all over its body. Lilith handed the bear over to Skittlez smiling up at him, a single tear rolling down her cheek.
Lilith: I want you to have this. I gots him earlier cos I found it funny how he looked like you what with him being white with skittlez on his fur and stuffs… but if this is indeeds the last times I ever sees you I want you to have him because I knows you needs more friends than I do… I gots LOADS of these back in my room… bought like twenty skittlez bears! But this one is super special because it has been next to my boobs. So he’s yours. And I don’t want you to worry about our match on Sunday cos even if we lose… WHICH I REALLY DONT THINK WE WILL!!! I won’t turn grrrrrrrrr on you… Sare Bear probably wants me to do that to see if I’ll go grrrrrrrrr and attack you but I’m not gonna cos I’m Lilith and I do what I want! BUT I DO NOT HURT FRIENDS!!! No matter how cute Sare Bear might be! So do nots worrys, Skittlez Bear… Lilo gots your back! Oh and one more thing… if you ever do make it big and gets a CD and stuffs… do not send me it cos I havent got a blues clue whats you’re even saying!
Lilith burst out laughing and shaking her head at her new friend in a playful way. Skittlez took the small multicolored bear and looked at Lilith with a smile, though it was obvious he was sad.
Skittlez: Yo … I don’t even know what to say. Like, dat’s the rillest thing anyone ever did yo.Imma cherish dis bear. Dis right here is my most important possession now. Mad love boo, mad love.
Skittlez bumps his fist to his chest in a sign of respect and gets into his car, looking back at Lilith once more before heading off.
Newark, New Jersey
7:13PM EST
When Lilith had first met Skittlez she did not like him, she didn’t tend to like a lot of people… unless they were her Sare Bear… or her FORMER Sare Bear, whatever she wanted to call herself nowadays. However after ignoring his silly little tweets and getting past his weird, almost scary appearance… Lilith had actually started to like him a little bit! And she knew that he would be her bestest friend for all eternity when he had brought her to her favorite restaurant in the whole entire world… McDonalds! The happifullest place in the world! The place where you got super awesome toys with your meal, could drink milkshakes, eat cookies and even yell at the staff if you felt like it. This place was like HEAVEN for Lilith.
Lilith and Skittlez arrive at the golden arches in his 1991 Geo, that looked a lot like a taxi because it was yellow. He felt really bad about taking her to such a cheap date on their first one and was about to apologize for his lack of money. But then Lilith’s eyes went big and she became super excited as they approached. Somehow, luck was on his side right now because what would be a nightmare date for any other woman, seemed to be perfect for Lilith.
Lilith grinned big as she looked out of her passenger side window at all the people coming out of the restaurant with balloons, toys and god only knows what else. She literally began to bounce up and down in her seat with excitement as Skittlez parked up.
Lilith: Oh my god… OH MY GOD… OH MY GOD!!! YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! I am sooooooooo excited for this!!! This is like the bestest date EVER!!! Usually I’d have to get all dressed up and wear clothes I wouldn't usually wear and go to these weird little places WHERE THEY DON’T EVEN GIVE YOU TOYS!!! But this?! This is just… OH MY GOD!!!
Lilith looked at the happy meal poster seeing that the toys they were giving the children/Lilith today were little dog ones which were super awesomely made toy versions of the dogs in that new dog movie which Lilith had been asking Sarah to take her to for so long… which she never had, the meanie!
Lilith: I WANT THAT ONE!!!
Skittlez looked over at what Lilith was pointing at and smiled
Skittlez: I gotchu boo. Whatever you want, dat shit is yours. You want dat puppy? You got it babi.
Skittlez got out of the car and trying to be a gentleman, he walked around and opened the door for Lilith. They WERE still in Newark, so you couldn’t say there were a lot of friendly people around. And even if there were, they’d have still been staring at the couple as people were now. To see this goofy looking white guy opening the car door for a stunning brunette as if they’d just pulled up to a five star restaurant was …. Very odd. Even weirder was Lilith’s reaction as if she WAS at such a classy place.
The two of them made their way inside and although Lilith already knew which toy she wanted, there was still the formality of figuring out which food she wanted with said toy. Skittlez opened his wallet and pulls out the $20 he had and prepared for them to order. Unable to contain her excitement any longer, Lilith jumped up onto the counter at the front of the restaurant and proceeded to grab hold of the nearby microphone which she somehow knew how to operate.
Lilith: Ummmmmm, yes… hello? Yes! Hi! My names Lilith, but you can call me Lilo for short anddddddd I’ll be ordering a happy meal today! Thanks!!!
One of the nearby workers looked over at the brunette as she continued to talk into the microphone. Totally jealous that she was doing so the worker attempted to push Lilith away but Lilith was having none of it!
Worker: Ummmmm, excuse me Miss but you aren’t allowed to use that…
Lilith: Hey! HEY!!! Shut up! I’m not even done yet! My…. ummmmms… date… hasn’t ordered yet AND I still haven’t even told you what toy I want!!!
Worker: Miss please get down so I can take your order…
Lilith: Nah ah! The magic microphone does all the work, you just stand there and look pretty! Anywayzzzzzzzzz…
Growing tired of Lilith not listening to her the worker stupidly attempted to put her hands on Lilith to push her down… or whatever it was she was trying to do. But doing this was not a good idea as Lilith grabbed her arm, hard, and pushed her into the ice cream machine sending sprinkles flying all over the place. Lilith just rolled her eyes at the girl as she looked back down at the microphone she still had in her other hand.
Lilith: Silly girl! What would Mistah McDonald say with you putting your hands on your number one and BESTEST IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD customer?! Anywayzzzzzzz before I was so rudely interrupted… as I was saying… I’ll takes the doggy with the brown tail andddddd what do you want, Mistah Rainbow Bear?
Skittlez was now trying to do damage control as the manager made his way out from the back and was likely going to throw them out of the restaurant for Lilith’s actions. So Skittlez calmly got Lilith to step away from the counter by promising he’d get her two of the toys. The manager didn’t look happy but Skittlez had an idea to calm things down.
Skittlez: Yo, like we sorry bout dat … she just got dun havin’ like … an MRI an’ shit… yeah dat’s what it was. So she ain’t got her senses ya know?
Luckily, the manager did a lot of work with Ronald McDonald house for sick children and had some sympathy for the bullshit story. He allows them to stay, and the girl who was originally going to take their order goes to the back, not wanting to deal with Lilith.
Skittlez: Alright so lemme have a quarter pounder with cheese meal, large dat shit. And mah dime piece here wants a happy meal, with that dog right there. Gimmie two of the toys yo.
Manager: What kind of happy meal?
Skittlez: Uhhh … yo boo, what you want in dat happy meal? Nuggets? Cheeseburger?
Lilith wasn’t paying any attention at all, she had been sitting there super confused since Skittlez had just called her what he had just called her. She eventually looked up at her tag team partner still with a puzzled look on her face.
Lilith: Ummmmmms… Candy Man… whats a dime piece? Isn’t that like… not very much moneys? Sooooooo like… thats not very nice to call me that! I should be a dollar piece at the very least!!!
Skittlez himself was confused at first … but then he realized where her confusion was at. He smiled and shook his head and tried to explain it.
Skittlez: Nah boo, it’s like when you rate someone on a scale of 1 to 10. A dime piece is a ten boo, it means you smokin’ hot babi.
Lilith still didn’t really understand what he was saying, cos of all that white bear / black bear confusion stuffs but she recognized the words “smokin’ hot” and this made her smile, big. The manager however was starting to look quite impatient.
Lilith: Ohhhhhhhh okayz, thanks! It means sooooooooo much to me to be complimented by a skittle.
Lilith gave him a sweet look as she looked back up at the manager with big eyes.
Lilith: What are you still doing here? I should have got my doggies like thirty minutes ago! I tells you this service is super terrible!
Manager: Ermmmm, I am waiting for you to tell me what food you’d like, Ma’am.
Lilith looked confused… again.
Lilith: What food do you think I want? Imma get TWO dogs! I want dog food! Duhhhhhh!!!
Skittlez steps in one more time, to get the order going.
Skittlez: Give us the McNuggets meal a’ight? And uh … gimmie a plain burger no bun too.
The manager now looked at Skittlez confused. Skittlez nodded his head assuring him he knew what he was doing. He ordered the burger so that Lilith could at least believe she was feeding the toy dogs, and it would make sure she got to eat her own happy meal. The order was placed.
Manager: That’s $18.93
Skittlez pays and it leaves him $1.07 left but it was worth it because his date was happy.
Before Skittlez could turn around to see where Lilith had disappeared to the brunette had run off to go and jump into the nearby ball pool, sending balls and children flying out of the pit. Lilith proceeded to throw a few balls as hard as she possibly could at a few of the remaining kids until they too left and she had declared the area to be hers.
Lilith: Skittlez! Hey! Over here! We gots the bestest seats in the house right there! Come join me!
Lilith called him over wondering whether or not he would actually do so, had this been Sarah with her she definitely wouldn’t and would have been mean to Lilith just for being in there by herself. Sarah didn’t like McDonalds very much, a thing Lilith had NEVER understood.
Skittlez shook his head and laughed as he saw his date in the ball pit. The manager again didn’t look pleased but some fake sad eyes from Skittlez as a reminder of the “MRI” and he let it slide. Skittlez got their order and brought it over to the closest table he could find to the ball pit and called out to Lilith.
Skittlez: C’mawn babi let’s eat dis food while it hot and den we can have as much fun as you want. I gotcha doggies here waitin’ for ya.
Lilith looks up at Skittlez and then back down at the brightly colored balls which were clearly way more fun than sitting in the boring area he was in.
Lilith: Nopes!!! You gots to get in here with me! We gotta work as a team now Mistah Fruity… we gots a big match coming up and I just KNOWS my Sare Bear will take me back if I do goods in it.
Skittlez shrugged and collected the tray of food as he climbed into the ball pit with Lilith.
Skittlez: A’ight, we eat here den.
He handed her the happy meal and her drink so they could eat and she could still have fun. Lilith looks over at the weird looking confused skittle with a tear in her eye.
Lilith: You knows, I didn’t actually expect you to come sit in here with me… I just wanted to see if you actually would cos no one has ever done so before… not Sare Bear, not Logi, not Obi Bear… no ones…
Lilith paused for a moment.
Lilith: Hmmmmmm… Skittlez, I wanna ask you a question and you gots to pinky promise that you won’t get upset and cry and run away okayz?
Skittlez looked very confused now as to why she would pose a question like dat. But, she took his back when no one else would and so sitting in a ball pit with her was no big deal. He nodded his head and listened.
Skittlez: Sure thing boo, what’s you got?
Lilith: Ummmmms… like… I knows you’ve been in WCF for like sooooooooo long, right? I means I remember watching a match of yours when I was with my Sare Bear YEARS ago. But like… you NEVER won a match, right? So like… it gots me thinking and like… do you even knows how to wrestle? Tis nothing to be ashamed of, Skittlez… I never knew how to wrestle either until my Sare Bear taught me. She was a SUPER good teacher too. Sooooo I was thinking since I’m your tag team partner this week and we gots to impress the bossy boots red fur… you wants me to teach you how to go grrrrrr mode so we can take down that candy shop? All we’d need is a box of cookies and a couple of cartoons… on DVD!
Skittlez looked down, again knowing that he’d been nothing but a joke in WCF. He sighed a bit and then looked back at her.
Skittlez: A’ight listen boo. I ain’t stupid ya feel? I know I was made ya partna because I dun lost every match I ever had. Hell I ain’t even know peeps did interviews up in dis bitch until you showed me dat. Ain’t nobody ever asked me about no match, cuz I ain’t never had no shot of winnin’ one. But dis time I gots a shot and dat shot is you. I ain’t gon’ let you down either boo. If Sarah gots beef wit you, den we gon’ handle it an’ shut dat biyotch up when we victorious an’ shit.
Lilith: Hmmmmm… okayz good. I wanna teach you something my Sare Bear always used to say to me when she was teaching me how to go grrrrrrrr mode. Nope, nope… I dont means “Stop looking down my top and pay attention, Lilith!” though she did say that a lot! She was super yummy when she gots all sweaty… how can you blame me? What Imma talking about is… after I’d do the training and the running and all that stuffs she’d get me to do… before the cookie eating, most important part by the way! She’d pull me aside and look me dead in the eyes and be all like… Lilith when you gets into the ring you gots to remember one thing… it isn’t about what you do with these…
Lilith lifted up her paws and showed them to Skittlez quickly before throwing them back down into the ball pit.
Lilith: ...its all about what you gots here!
Lilith placed her finger down against Skittlez chest with a nice, encouraging smile.
Lilith: I dunno really what she meant by that, or if it ever even really happened… but I figures she was just saying I had nice boobs! Soooooooo what Imma saying is… if on Sunday we gets… or you gets beaten down bad all you gots to do is show them your boobs, okayz? It’ll work great!
Lilith looked down at her dogs which she was now feeding hamburger meat to.
Lilith: Does that help at all?
Skittlez listened on as Lilith talked and he understood what the message was supposed to be. In fact he got hyped up about it. Lilith’s pep talk really set him off.
Skittlez: I gotchu, we gots dis boo. Ain’t nobody gots more heart. They might be lookin’ unstoppable and our victory improbable but ain’t nothin’ impossible what they gon’ say when they get toppled yo?
Skittlez started one of his raps again which made Lilith giggle since she never understood anything he said when he talked that way. So he stopped rapping after a few short lines and just enjoys seeing Lilith smile.
Lilith: You talk soooooo funny! Hahaha! Anywayz listens, Mistah Skittle Bear… you know anything about our opponents? I’m not gonna lie… I sat down with a DVD and some popcorn and tried to study them just like Sare Bear always taught me to do before a match but I gots super distracted by their manager girl… she’s soooooooooo yummy!!! The things I’d do to her… let me tells you! So anywayz yeah… I didn’t really learn a lot aside from what bra size she was… which I am SUPER good at guessing by the way!
Skittlez thought about it a minute and I mean, he knew this crazy chick was like bisexual so it was actually cool as shit they could talk about how hot some other chick was. But this needed to be business because Skittlez had only this one shot. And it wasn’t even about himself anymore, he wanted to impress his tag team partner.
Skittlez: Yo, all I knows is dat dis Drake Knight is a big ass brick house. Homie’s like three hundred pounds an’ shit … and his partner Ice, she’s like the female version of him, but uglier. So yo check it, if we just look at da ugly bitch, we gots dis cuz who don’t wanna smack da shit outta some ugly bitch ya feel me?
Yet again Lilith wasn’t fully paying attention. She had completely tuned out when she realized who… or what she’d be facing this week.
Lilith: Wait… wait wait wait wait WAIT!!! Are you tellings me that my former Sare Bear put me in a tag match with a talking skittle and we’ll be facing a house?! Like… an actual house?! How does Sare Bear expect me to beat that!
Lilith paused to think about it for a moment.
Lilith: Ummmmm… unless we get like a bulldozer thinggy and maybe a rocket launcher and some other kinda guns and just blow it up til its collapsed…
Yet again she paused and then a massive smile spread across her face, Lilith was extremely happiful with herself.
Lilith: Wait! I got it… you said it was a house, right? Like… as in the three little pigs?! Alls we need is a wolf! Those things blown down houses no problem! ...unless they’re made out of bricks. Stupid pigs! What sort of pig builds a brick house!
Skittlez had his jaw wide open as Lilith spoke. He was mesmerized at the fact she was taking this so very literally. So he tried to steer her back in the right direction.
Skittlez: Nah nah boo. He ain’t actually a house. It’s like a expression an’ shit. It means he real big and like full of pure muscle an’ shit. An’ like, he gots dis ugly ass bitch as his partna. So like, we just gotta only look at da ugly bitch an’ we’ll win cuz seein’ ugly bitches make me mad an’ shit I dunno boutchu.
Lilith nodded her head clearly pretending that she knew EXACTLY what he had just said to her.
Lilith: Hmmmmm… you knows, I knows these big muscle bears are supposed to be all grrrrrrrrr and scary and stuffs but they don’t usually do too good against me. Like theres this one called Obi Bear… I dunno if you’ve heard of him or not… but anywayz he’s all grrrrrr and WHAM CRASH BANG and stuffs and he’s all like… look at me! I’m all big and strong and grrrrr! But I’m just like… NOPE!!! And bopped him on the head and sent him night night and put him back in the toy box. Sooooooo Imma imagine that this bear is no different to Obi Bear… except this one probably gots candy in his pockets and stuffs cos hes from the Candy Shop, right? So I wouldn’t worry about him too much, Skittle face. As for his pretty… and ugly little bitch bears… you go grrrrrrrrr mode cos of that ones ugly little face and I’ll go outside of the ring to deal with Kandi.
Lilith slyly winked at Skittlez, once again her mind was in a dirty place.
Lilith: As they say… once you’ve got black, you don’t go back! Sooooo Imma soooooo paint my nails black that night!
Skittlez looked dumbfounded as Lilith made her dirty comments.
Skittlez: I dunno what the shit you just said but fuck it, it sounded sexy as fuck anyway. Don’ even worry about dat Kandi bitch yo, yous wayyyyyy more smokin’ hot than her. Yous gotta be careful wit dem blonde bitches. Dey usually gots all air in dey heads an’ shit.
Considering he was talking to a brunette with the mentality of a 10 year old, that blonde statement didn’t exactly hold much weight. But in any case, he was trying to compliment and psyche up his partner … and there was probably a bunch of flirting involved too. Because let’s face it, how many times in Skittlez’ lifetime was he ever gonna be this close to a chick who looked like Lilith? Probably never again.
For the past minute or so Lilith had been busy laughing as loud as she possibly could. The thought of bubble gum blondes really did make her laugh… even if they were super hot and yummy.
Lilith: Hahahahahaha!!! Oh my god bear don’t even get me started on bubble gums! This one time, right? I knew this bubble gum and I ended up turning her into a robot! It was great! You should have been there, Skittle Bear! Hahahahaha!!!
At this point the manager came over because some of the mothers of the children who were forced out of the play area by Lilith had complained. He informed Lilith and Skittlez that they had to leave the children’s play area. Skittlez nodded and understood. He tried to coax Lilith to leave as well and he would take her back to her room and drop her off but Lilith was having none of it and had no intentions of moving… especially not because some greasy little nerd was asking her to. Instead she sat there and started throwing balls at the man, bouncing them off of his head making him get even angrier with her.
Manager: Ma’am, if you don’t leave we will have to call the authorties.
Lilith: Pffffffft! Sare Bear?! Fine! Call her! I don’t care! She won’t do anything EVERYONE knows that! Besides even if she did come here which I knows she won't… she’d just end up taking me back when I take her down into this here ball pool thinggy! We never did do it in here…
One of the mothers covered her childs ears as Lilith continued talking about how she’d rape her now boss in the ball pit. Skittlez however looked a mix between uncomfortable and turned on and Lilith found this very very funny. The manager turned around and headed off to call the police. Skittlez was now completely worried about the situation.
Skittlez: Boo we gots to go. I can’t be gettin’ locked up and neither can you. How we’s gon’ win and impress your Sare Bear if we’s locked up boo?
Lilith rolled her eyes as she stood up from the colorful balls below her, picking up the biggest shiniest red one.
Lilith: Okay fine but I’m taking this! Kick me out of this place will they! Pffffffffft! They’d be NOTHING without me! I mades them! Carried their name when they were busy sitting at home and doing nothing! For years now its all been me… me me me! And what do they do?! Just turn their backs on me the first chance they get… I loved her and this is what she does to me?! How could she do this…
Several tears began to roll down Liliths face as she was clearly no longer talking about the McDonalds Skittlez had been busy trying to lead her out of.
Lilith: Why doesn’t she love me like I love her, Skittlez?
Lilith wiped a few of her tears away as more quickly followed them. Skittlez lead her out to his hoopty and opened the door for her to get in. He didn’t like seeing her upset but they had to split, so he jumped in and revved the engine as they peeled out from the Mickey D’s.
Skittlez: Yo don’ you worry babi. She ain’t gon’ have no CHOICE but to take ya back when we dun’ git ours. Bust a cap in dey ass and walk out on top. Make her take notice boo!
Lilith wiped a few more of her tears away as she looked over at Skittlez, who was busy trying to cheer her up. It was odd having a friend who wasn’t mistreating her, telling her to make him a hotdog or trying to rape her.
Lilith: You’re right, Skittlez! First thing Imma do after I’ve beaten these idiotic little bears on Sunday is march right into Sare Bears office… tell her how I just gots done raping that blonde furred bear, Kandi… and ask her if she's jealous. And then… THEN!!! If she says no Imma call her a liar and then… well… I guess we’ll just see what happens then. But the important thing is… I won’t have imagined it AND I will hopefully get my own way… cos I’m Lilith and Lilith ALWAYS gets what she wants… usually!
Eventually the car made it’s way to Lilith’s hotel and Skittlez pulled it up to the front. He looked over at her and smiled, knowing they were now focused on the task at hand and Lilith was ready to make things right in her life.
Skittlez: Yo, don’ worry boo. Imma not let you down. Imma be up at the arena e’ryday trainin’ an’ shit. We gots dis like fo’ rills we do.
Skittlez gets out of the car and again opens the door for Lilith, knowing that aside from Sunday, this would probably be the last time he ever saw her.
Skittlez: Yo gots ta do you boo. Yo’ Sare Bear ain’t gonna have no otha option but to take notice when we handle our bidniss ya feel me?
Lilith knew that this was probably one of the last times she would ever see the weirdo rapper bear too. It actually made her quite sad to think about this because aside from the asshole manager telling them to leave for no reason, this was probably the best night out Lilith had been on in a long long time. She gave him a final concerned look.
Lilith: Ummmmmms… you knows after our match on Sunday… what will you do? Cos… even if Sare Bear is proved to be wrong and just bad mood bearing for no reason about you and me… I don’t think she’ll keep you on here. She doesn’t tend to be too nice and happiful like that… especially not since I’m not with her anymore. She's probably turned into like Darth Sarah or something by now she's so grumpy and miserable and stuffs! You gonna be okayz, Mistah Fruity?
Skittlez sighed thinking about it. He knew that after this match he was probably going back down to enhancement talent status, or worse … unemployed. But he held his chin up and just took it as it was.
Skittlez: I be a’ight … sheeeeeet, I always do me. Ya know, sumpin’ sumpin’ gots ta happen. Maybe da labels catch me on live T.V. ya know? Next thing I gots a record deal. Like I said, dis my shot an’ I’m goin’ all in boo. Don’ worry bout me.
Lilith nodded her head trying her hardest to give her new friend a smile whilst she was holding back the tears.
Lilith: Mmhmmmm… I… I, ummmmm… I want you to have something.
Lilith reached down into her bra and rummaged around down there for several moments until she brought her hand back up and out holding a little multi colored bear. It was about six inches big and had white fur with multi colored dots all over its body. Lilith handed the bear over to Skittlez smiling up at him, a single tear rolling down her cheek.
Lilith: I want you to have this. I gots him earlier cos I found it funny how he looked like you what with him being white with skittlez on his fur and stuffs… but if this is indeeds the last times I ever sees you I want you to have him because I knows you needs more friends than I do… I gots LOADS of these back in my room… bought like twenty skittlez bears! But this one is super special because it has been next to my boobs. So he’s yours. And I don’t want you to worry about our match on Sunday cos even if we lose… WHICH I REALLY DONT THINK WE WILL!!! I won’t turn grrrrrrrrr on you… Sare Bear probably wants me to do that to see if I’ll go grrrrrrrrr and attack you but I’m not gonna cos I’m Lilith and I do what I want! BUT I DO NOT HURT FRIENDS!!! No matter how cute Sare Bear might be! So do nots worrys, Skittlez Bear… Lilo gots your back! Oh and one more thing… if you ever do make it big and gets a CD and stuffs… do not send me it cos I havent got a blues clue whats you’re even saying!
Lilith burst out laughing and shaking her head at her new friend in a playful way. Skittlez took the small multicolored bear and looked at Lilith with a smile, though it was obvious he was sad.
Skittlez: Yo … I don’t even know what to say. Like, dat’s the rillest thing anyone ever did yo.Imma cherish dis bear. Dis right here is my most important possession now. Mad love boo, mad love.
Skittlez bumps his fist to his chest in a sign of respect and gets into his car, looking back at Lilith once more before heading off.
