Post by Jeff Purse on Jun 25, 2016 20:20:24 GMT -5
'A lot of legends, a lot of people, have come before me. But this is my time.' -Usain Bolt
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KARRRRRRRIIIIIIIIII
The scene opens up to Jeff running around the house with Patrick, his five month old baby held out in front of him. He has a look of absolute horror on his face and he moves through the hall, finally kicking open the door to Kari's office, where she conducted her manager duties. She was sitting at her desk emailing someone in the WCF about an apperance for Jeff before Blast for him to visit some sick kids.
Kari Kendall: What Jeff? I am working.
Jeff Purse: I know, and I know we have talked about how I can't come barging in here like that, and I compeltely understand, but I have a fucking emergency!
Kari Kendall: What?
Kari takes the baby and begins inspecting him, thinking that he was hurt in some way. Jeff quickly took off his shirt and took out a lighter.
Kari Kendall: What are you doing?
Jeff Purse: He threw up on my shirt, it needs to die!
Kari Kendall: JEFF!
She swats at him and grabs the shirt before it can actually catch on fire, though he was actively holding it over an open flame, waiting for its destruction.
Kari Kendall: Jeff, you know I love you, and I find your condition...charming. But we have discussed this before, you can't burn your clothes if the baby throws up on them. Its what babies do.
Jeff Purse: Nobody ever explains to you how hard it is to raise kids, you know?
He begins rearranging her desk, seperating the pens from the highlighters from the sharpies. She smacks his hand away.
Kari Kendall: This is why I don't want you in here. Please don't rearrange my stuff.
He continues to rearrange her stuff, even after she shoves his hand away again.
Jeff Purse: Kari, I promise you, you will thank me later.
Kari Kendall: Have I ever Jeff? Have I ever/
Jeff Purse: Just every time I have helped you.
Kari lets out a deep sigh and just lets him have at it while she sits at her desk holding the baby. After the pens Jeff grabs the tape dispenser and the stapler. He begins what can only be described as trying to figure out which one weighs more. Kari rolled her eyes.
Kari Kendall: So Stu is in this match? Thats too bad. I like him.
Jeff Purse: I like him too. I am glad he is in it. We can really give each other some good competition.
Kari Kendall: Yeah, but I want to see him win.
Jeff Purse: Thanks darling.
She hits him and he smiles.
Kari Kendall: You know what I mean, ass. Hey, I talked to my mom today and she brought it up again.
This news is enough to make Jeff stop counting the individual staples inside the stapler and he turned to Kari.
Jeff Purse: Kari I am just really busy with the title-
Kari Kendall: Jeff, its ok. But I think we should talk about it.
Jeff Purse: Now?
Kari Kendall: No, I have to do work, and you need to take this baby and get out of here.
She kisses Patrick on the head and hands him back to Jeff, who takes the baby and then kisses Kari.
Jeff Purse: I love you.
Kari Kendall: Ok, get out.
He smiles and leaves.
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We join Jeff in a spot we have seen him in a million times before. It was his favorite spot to come and sit, and think. He could get clarity on issues he needed clarity on here. He came here when he was about to win his first World Championship, in fact any big belt win had seen Jeff sitting in this very spot, either looking forward to what was to come, or to reflect on what had happened. It was the place Jeff had sat and thought about his decision to marry Kari, and although the wedding still hasn't happened....this is where he decided he was going to spend the rest of his life here. I am talking about his half pipe. He was sitting atop it, looking out into the stars in the night sky.
Jeff Purse: Nathan Chambers. Oh wait, sorry, let me get this exactly, exactly right. Nathan ‘Perfection’ Chambers. Now that is cute. I mean, here is a guy who thinks that he is the real deal, the epitome of a WCF wrestler, he believes, I mean he really, really believes he is perfect. Most people, if not everyone, knows that not one person is perfect in every way, that’s just a fact. Hell, even in wrestling, nobody is perfect. Oblivion is too slow, Zombie McMorris snorts too much coke, Jonny Fly is too cocky, Steve Orbit has a bad past, Corey Black is tiny, Jay Omega is Canadian, Thomas Bates is too opinionated, Seth Lerch is too drunk, Adam Young is…well Adam Young, and me? Well, I am the exception to that rule, Nate.
Jeff adjusted his focus from the stars to the camera which, up to this point, he seemed to not be aware of.
Jeff Purse: I am the exception because I have identified my ‘imperfections’ in the ring, and I know how to compensate for them. I am not the strongest, but I am the fastest. I am not the biggest, but I am the bravest. I may not be the future of this company anymore, but mostly because I am not the present. I am now IT, when it comes to this company, Nathan, and I am not talking about Oblivion, no, I am talking about what it means to be the ‘real deal’, what it means to be ‘on top’, Nathan, I am talking about what it means to be truly perfect when it comes to this business.
You, Nathan, you don’t know what the fuck you are doing. I see you out there, every week, trying your damndest to be respected; trying your absolute hardest to pick up wins so that somewhere, someone will say “Damn kid, good job.” I know that’s what you want. You are so fucking transparent its not even funny. “As I said, once you oppose Perfection, bad things happen.” Ha. You know what that is Chambers? That is a child screaming out LOOK AT ME!!! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!! TELL ME I AM GOOD!!!
You know how I know that, Nate? Because that was me. I used to be the same exact fucking way. Growing up without a father can do that to a guy. But I realized a long time ago that that wasn’t going to get me anywhere. The attention, the glory? No, I couldn’t wrestling for that. I couldn’t wrestle to make guys think I was good. I couldn’t wrestle for the admiration of the people, though it helps. Fuck, I realized its not even about the titles. They are a goal, but they are not the motivation. Learn that, Chambers, if you want to go anywhere in this company. Winning and losing, none of that shit matters. You know what matters, Chambers?
Jeff brings his hand over his chest and pounds lightly.
Jeff Purse: Heart. Plain and simple. Its heart. You know why I still do this? You know why I love this? Do you know why I am a two time motherfucking World Champion in the World Championship Federation? Because I have heart, Chambers. I have the biggest mother fucking heart out of anyone on this damn roster. You know why? Because I am STILL. FUCKING. HERE. NOBODY on this roster has been through as much SHIT in this fucking company than I have. But here I am on top of the fucking throne, again, because not one mother fucker out there has more heart than me. Understand that, kid? Understand that you jobbing jobber?
You are not my test. I am tested my friend. I am proven. I can sit at ringside if I fucking want to, do you understand? I am not the one who NEEDS to win. I could lose this match and be in the main fucking event NEXT WEEK. Do you understand what that is like, KID? No. No you don’t. You have no clue what its like to be me. You have no clue what its like to be. And with the fucking shitty attitude you have, you never will. Not with that piss poor attitude you have.
You think because you have a couple of wins under your belt, you can compete against me? You think because you have won some title belt that you are somehow better than me? “I won my belt faster” what the fuck does that mean? You won a lesser title belt in less time than I won my SECOND world title? Wow guy, cool accomplishment. I remember when I was new and I used to tell people ‘I won the tag titles faster than anybody yar yar”. Here is the truth. I don’t care. Nobody cares. Nobody cares what you have done.
Getting up from sitting on the top of the platform, he moves his way over to the railing that ran along the back on top of the half pipe. He jumped up and sat on the top bar, looking down on the sleek curvature of the pipe.
Jeff Purse: All anyone cares is what you can do in the ring. That’s it. I’ll tell you what kid, you have some talent. I am going to give you that, you definitely know the basics of wrestling. You know how to whip people, you know how to do a hip toss, and wow, I saw you DDT someone, and it was done the way DDT’s are supposed to be done. That is great. You know how to work in the ring, just as much as any other wrestler. So then what? Whats next?
I know whats next for you kid, you keep heading down this fucked up road you are headed. You lose this match, that’s for sure. Then you try to prove yourself against Slane, because he seems to be the guy you decided to go after, which, I know you don’t realise this, is a mistake. Slane is one of the baddest mother fuckers in this place, and he will not hesitate to teach you a lesson that you so deserve. You will keep trying to test yourself against guys you are not ready to face, till you lose your belt, probably to Zombie McMorris, and then drift into obscurity until nobody knows who you are, you will never be on top, you will never be ‘perfect’ and you will be all alone. Is that the route you want to choose? Think about it.
He begins kicking his legs a bit, before they were resting on the middle bar of the railing, now they just hung free.
Jeff Purse: James ‘The Game’ Chevalier. What is that, French? Are you Canadian or French, or both? I know them Qubecions like to fuck around if you don’t speak any French. Or maybe you are from France. You were born in Portland, so I am going to say you are not from France. But maybe that’s where your lineage leads you to, eh? France. Les Miserables was a great show. I saw it, loved, cried at it, then saw the movie. The movie is nothing like the play, as much as they try, and while they try really hard, the movie cannot be anything like the actual stage play.
You know why? Because in theatre everything you are seeing is HAPPENING in the moment. Anything, ANYTHING could go wrong, but at the same time everything can go right. With a movie, well, once you have seen it once, you have seen it. Nothing ever changes. Oh sure you might notice something you didn’t notice before, but nothing ever really changes. It’s always just…Russell Crowe and Hugh Jackman singing songs at each other. They also have to cut a lot out of movies, taking out of every musical to movie adaptation, the essence that is the heart of the musical itself.
Why am I talking about this, you ask? Because all of this is true in something else, there, James. Because wrestling, professional, amateur, indie, it all is like a fucking stage production, don’t you agree? You have the main players, in Les Mis its prisoner 24601 Jean Valjean running from Javert over the course of 33 years. 33 years! Holy shit no way. Yes way, though, my friend, yes way. Jevert never actually catches Prisoner 24601. Their story spans over the years, they are each others antithesis, as Javert says in a song, ‘it is either Valjean or Javert’.
He smiles and slides off the bar of the railing, now just leaning against it and looking at the camera.
Jeff Purse: You need someone like this to get you through the wrestling world, James. I have mine. His name? Nathan von Liebert. He will be back, I am sure, but for now, I reign supreme over him, until I banish him back to the depths of hell from which he came. And I bring this up James because you are new here, you don’t know know a lot of the history that has taken place here James. But you are a step above Mr. Chambers. Because James, you have your opposite. You have your heel. You have your antithesis. Im not going to tell you who, that’s no fun.
Anyway, back to my original point, Javert eventually kills himself, Valjean dies, yadda yadda. Here is what I am trying to say, in a long winded way I suppose. This kind of heart that these two have, this kind of anger, this kind of determination, that’s what makes great wrestlers. James, you have it, you can be it, but you aren’t it yet.
I have worked since day one to make a name for myself. I have faced difficult opponent after difficult opponent to get to where I am today. I have defied the odds. I have risen to the top. I have showed the naysayers that I am capable. I have been through literally everything. I have done it all. I have won the championships, I have won the big matches, I have helped run the company, I have managed, I have been injured I have done everything. I am the embodiment of what it means to be a WCF superstar. And I don’t take the word ‘superstar’ lightly. You are not a superstar James.
You are not ‘The Game’. Not yet at least. I know, you call yourself that, but its just not very true. You should call yourself ‘Almost the Game’ or ‘So Close to Being The Game’. Haha. But I understand, you are shooting for the stars. Those stars, though, kiddo, me. Well, perhaps kiddo is not the wrong word, you are a year older than me. I mean that just has to hurt, right? Because, you know, I am a year younger than you, but just…incredibly more successful. Like, incredibly more successful. Holy shit how much more successful I am than you. Fuck, you came up through the Indies, and I was good enough to skip all that fucking bullshit and came right to the fucking show.
I mean you have done a lot since you have been here. You beat Thomas Bates, the big beastly man who most resembles the Pokemon Snorlax. And then you beat the Hardcore wonder, the mother fucking bad ass who cheaply attacked my boy Scarecrow, Mikey eXtreme. Those guys are no joke. They are tough opponents. I never would have guessed that you beat those guys. So far, I am impressed. Here is where your career gets rocky.
Jeff walks over to the edge of the platform he is standing on and plops himself down on the ledge, dangling his feet right over the curve of the half pipe.
Jeff Purse: The next match you have is a six man tag match. A budding star such as yourself, hot on a winning streak, should have gotten the pin in that match. But you didn’t…you didn’t. You took your own momentum away from you when you let Stuart Slane get that pin. Because he didn’t need it, he is established he is loved…you? Nobody knows who the fuck you are.
Back when I was first starting, I was also in a six man tag…the first one I was in here. Of course, mine meant a lot more than yours, but it was Me, Nathan von Liebert, and Night Rider vs Corey Black, Oblivion, and Frank Patrick Venable. Do you know what happened in that match, James? No, of course not, cause you weren’t there, you didn’t do your research, and you haven’t heard me talk about it before. I put Corey Black through a table, James. I pinned Oblivion for the win, who was a former WCF World Champion at the time. And look at me now, James.
My point here is that you have to be able to bring it when it matters. James, you proved that your not ready yet. You can’t bring it when it matters. Not yet anyway. I have no doubt that you will eventually get there, but right now? No. Now is not your time. Now is my time. Now is the time for Jeff Purse to once again prove why he deserves to be on top. It’s a new era of WCF, and its my fucking job to lead it, understand? THIS SHIT RESTS ON MY SHOULDERS! I am the guy who will return WCF to what it was, not you, not Chambers, and not Slane. Jeff mo’fukkin Purse. Because I am better. Period. End of story.
Jeff slides down the pipe, as he has done so many times in the past, and lands laying at the bottom of the pipe, or directly in the middle, however you would wanna word it yourself. He stares up at the sky.
Jeff Purse: Do you know why I respect Stuart Slane more than anyone else on the roster right now? Because Stuart Slane realized his OWN faults and reached out to change what he knew was not working for him. He changed because he knew he had to, and he knew it was the right thing to do. Stuart Slane is a hell of a human being. Who else could actually say that they could spot the thing that is holding them back and actively reach out and change it? Not many. And if you can, you automatically become a fucking hell of a guy or gal in my opinion.
Slane has had quite a history when it comes to WCF. Climbing that ladder only to get so close to his goal, only to fail. Its tragic really. Think of it this way, every time, EVERY TIME you were about to achieve everything you have ever wanted in this entire world, the one thing you wanted, and you fail. EVERY TIME. I don't know what thats like, but its awfully tragic. Its like there is a chemical makeup written into the biology of Stuart Slane to get almost get to that point and then just fall. I mean, look at his past.
He won mediocre titles here and there, and had great runs with them, and then he would face someone like Steve Orbit, or Jonny Fly, and he would just fall flat. A man who should have already won the World Championship in his life, but unfortunately his fate just wont let him. A man who seemingly his whole life he was a scout. He was a scoutmaster. It had to be something that he truly fucking loved, because he STILL did it while he was wrestling. Do you understand what a fucking commitment that is?
I loved riding BMX. Not only did I love it, but I was the best at it. I was very, very good. Hell, everything I have is because of those years that I made a name for myself in the extreme sports world. Some of the guys I met there are my best friends to this day. I regularly have dinner with Dave Mirra. It was thrilling, it was competitve, it was fufilling, and I quit that so I could wrestle. Thats how much of a time commitment wrestling is. You need to devote your whole self to it. You need to put one hundred and mother fucking ten percent to wrestling.
Jeff leans up on the curve of the half pipe, looking directly across him at the other side. It had a small smudge in the gleam of the finish. He took a hanky out of his back pocket.
Jeff Purse: I mean, don't think I am saying I gave up my life for wrestling. Because my real life didn't start till the first day I stepped through that curtain to, thats right, All the Small things, my original entrance music. Anyway, the point I am getting at is that Slane had success even though he was a scoutmaster. And what happened to that? He was disowned by the fucking scouts by the scoutmaster general. Which, honestly I didn't know was a real thing. Who would have thought?
But that there is his downfall. Scoutmaster Stuart Slane never had the focus to be able to compete at the level that I did. New and improved Stuart Slane still doesn't have the focus. He will, one day. One day I will accompany that big bear to the ring, because him and I are tight now, and he will defeat someone for the title, and he will hold that title high over his head, and I will be fucking glowering with pride and happiness for this fucking guy.
Jeff starts rubbing the smudge out of the gloss of the finish on the pipe.
Jeff Purse: But now is NOT his time. Blast is not the time for Stu to hold that fucking belt over his head. Sorry buddy. This is still my time. And Stu is going to give me everything that he has, I know, and I am going to give him everything I have right back. And because of me and Slane, this match is going to be one of the most epic title matches there has been in recent memory. We are both going to go hard. And thats the way its supposed to be done. With the competitors going as fucking hard as they can, getting in that ring and beating the shit out of each other.
Slane and I are going to do that. I am going directly after him. The other two? Fuck them. I don't care as much about them. Are they threats? Meh. Stuart? Yes. He is my main focus and I can't stress it enough that him and I have such a respect for each other that I know he is going to come at me just as tough as I do him. But this is where you get into the technicalities of wrestling. This is where you seperate those who are destined for greatness, and those who just fall short.
And thats you Stu. You are going to fall short. Because the plain and simple fact is that I can out wrestle you. Oh sure, Slane is a big mother fucker. He hits me too many times and I am down for the fucking count. But what Slane will have to watch for is my speed, my charisma, and my mother fucking Spoke. I can run circles around Slane, I can dodge and duck his strikes better than anyone else he has ever gone against. Its a proven fact that I can. I have backed these facts up thousands of times. Ask Gravedigger. Ask Jonny Fly. Ask Nathan von Liebert. Jeff Purse is fucking fast.
Which means that I will kick the shit out of your face at a fucking moments notice. You don't see the spoke coming until you are watching the fucking tape back. And you know it Stu. You know that that kick comes out of no where. You know that ninety percent of the people who get it do not see it coming. Its the way I have made it. People think I have gone soft because I went through a period where I had bigger things on my mind so I was losing matches. But not anymore Stu. Its unfortunate that you have to be in the match where I mother fucking show up. But if I don't, whats the point to being the champion? Something I need you to learn Stu. A lesson I will beat the fuck into you. Because I respect you, Slane. Because I know that one day it can be you.
He has finally rubbed the smudge out of the pipe and replaces the handkerchief in his back pocket, first folding it in a way that all the sides were even. He looks up at the camera.
Jeff Purse: WCF, I am back. I am back to being the fucking ass kicking, mid air flipping, fire starting, insane stunt doing mother fucker I have always been. I am not going to sit around and watch this influx of new people take over what should be The Jeff Purse era. I am on my own for the first time since I came to this federation. If it wasn't Pantheon, it was Night Rider, or Cryogenix, or any number of people I knew had my back. In this one, I am truly alone for the first time, and I am the WCF Champion. There is no Night Rider to be my tag partner. There is no Cryogenix. There is, for the first time, no Pantheon. Its just Jeff Purse.
There is no Corey Black anymore. There is no Jay Omega. There is no Alex Richards, or Chelsea Armstrong. No Polar Phantasm, no Steve Orbit, no Jay Price, no Skylar Striker, no Johnny Reb, no sign of Brad Kane or Bobby Cairo. No Nightmare. There is no Jonny Fly. My new team? Kari Kendall, Patrick Gage Purse, and me, Jeff Purse. For the first time in my career, and I will tell you something, its the best fucking team I have ever had. I am the luckiest mother fucker alive, and that luck does NOT end on Sunday. Boys.....welcome to The Future.
He smiles at the camera, a sly side smile, as he turns on his heels and walks back through his yard to the house. The scene fades to black.
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KARRRRRRRIIIIIIIIII
The scene opens up to Jeff running around the house with Patrick, his five month old baby held out in front of him. He has a look of absolute horror on his face and he moves through the hall, finally kicking open the door to Kari's office, where she conducted her manager duties. She was sitting at her desk emailing someone in the WCF about an apperance for Jeff before Blast for him to visit some sick kids.
Kari Kendall: What Jeff? I am working.
Jeff Purse: I know, and I know we have talked about how I can't come barging in here like that, and I compeltely understand, but I have a fucking emergency!
Kari Kendall: What?
Kari takes the baby and begins inspecting him, thinking that he was hurt in some way. Jeff quickly took off his shirt and took out a lighter.
Kari Kendall: What are you doing?
Jeff Purse: He threw up on my shirt, it needs to die!
Kari Kendall: JEFF!
She swats at him and grabs the shirt before it can actually catch on fire, though he was actively holding it over an open flame, waiting for its destruction.
Kari Kendall: Jeff, you know I love you, and I find your condition...charming. But we have discussed this before, you can't burn your clothes if the baby throws up on them. Its what babies do.
Jeff Purse: Nobody ever explains to you how hard it is to raise kids, you know?
He begins rearranging her desk, seperating the pens from the highlighters from the sharpies. She smacks his hand away.
Kari Kendall: This is why I don't want you in here. Please don't rearrange my stuff.
He continues to rearrange her stuff, even after she shoves his hand away again.
Jeff Purse: Kari, I promise you, you will thank me later.
Kari Kendall: Have I ever Jeff? Have I ever/
Jeff Purse: Just every time I have helped you.
Kari lets out a deep sigh and just lets him have at it while she sits at her desk holding the baby. After the pens Jeff grabs the tape dispenser and the stapler. He begins what can only be described as trying to figure out which one weighs more. Kari rolled her eyes.
Kari Kendall: So Stu is in this match? Thats too bad. I like him.
Jeff Purse: I like him too. I am glad he is in it. We can really give each other some good competition.
Kari Kendall: Yeah, but I want to see him win.
Jeff Purse: Thanks darling.
She hits him and he smiles.
Kari Kendall: You know what I mean, ass. Hey, I talked to my mom today and she brought it up again.
This news is enough to make Jeff stop counting the individual staples inside the stapler and he turned to Kari.
Jeff Purse: Kari I am just really busy with the title-
Kari Kendall: Jeff, its ok. But I think we should talk about it.
Jeff Purse: Now?
Kari Kendall: No, I have to do work, and you need to take this baby and get out of here.
She kisses Patrick on the head and hands him back to Jeff, who takes the baby and then kisses Kari.
Jeff Purse: I love you.
Kari Kendall: Ok, get out.
He smiles and leaves.
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We join Jeff in a spot we have seen him in a million times before. It was his favorite spot to come and sit, and think. He could get clarity on issues he needed clarity on here. He came here when he was about to win his first World Championship, in fact any big belt win had seen Jeff sitting in this very spot, either looking forward to what was to come, or to reflect on what had happened. It was the place Jeff had sat and thought about his decision to marry Kari, and although the wedding still hasn't happened....this is where he decided he was going to spend the rest of his life here. I am talking about his half pipe. He was sitting atop it, looking out into the stars in the night sky.
Jeff Purse: Nathan Chambers. Oh wait, sorry, let me get this exactly, exactly right. Nathan ‘Perfection’ Chambers. Now that is cute. I mean, here is a guy who thinks that he is the real deal, the epitome of a WCF wrestler, he believes, I mean he really, really believes he is perfect. Most people, if not everyone, knows that not one person is perfect in every way, that’s just a fact. Hell, even in wrestling, nobody is perfect. Oblivion is too slow, Zombie McMorris snorts too much coke, Jonny Fly is too cocky, Steve Orbit has a bad past, Corey Black is tiny, Jay Omega is Canadian, Thomas Bates is too opinionated, Seth Lerch is too drunk, Adam Young is…well Adam Young, and me? Well, I am the exception to that rule, Nate.
Jeff adjusted his focus from the stars to the camera which, up to this point, he seemed to not be aware of.
Jeff Purse: I am the exception because I have identified my ‘imperfections’ in the ring, and I know how to compensate for them. I am not the strongest, but I am the fastest. I am not the biggest, but I am the bravest. I may not be the future of this company anymore, but mostly because I am not the present. I am now IT, when it comes to this company, Nathan, and I am not talking about Oblivion, no, I am talking about what it means to be the ‘real deal’, what it means to be ‘on top’, Nathan, I am talking about what it means to be truly perfect when it comes to this business.
You, Nathan, you don’t know what the fuck you are doing. I see you out there, every week, trying your damndest to be respected; trying your absolute hardest to pick up wins so that somewhere, someone will say “Damn kid, good job.” I know that’s what you want. You are so fucking transparent its not even funny. “As I said, once you oppose Perfection, bad things happen.” Ha. You know what that is Chambers? That is a child screaming out LOOK AT ME!!! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!! TELL ME I AM GOOD!!!
You know how I know that, Nate? Because that was me. I used to be the same exact fucking way. Growing up without a father can do that to a guy. But I realized a long time ago that that wasn’t going to get me anywhere. The attention, the glory? No, I couldn’t wrestling for that. I couldn’t wrestle to make guys think I was good. I couldn’t wrestle for the admiration of the people, though it helps. Fuck, I realized its not even about the titles. They are a goal, but they are not the motivation. Learn that, Chambers, if you want to go anywhere in this company. Winning and losing, none of that shit matters. You know what matters, Chambers?
Jeff brings his hand over his chest and pounds lightly.
Jeff Purse: Heart. Plain and simple. Its heart. You know why I still do this? You know why I love this? Do you know why I am a two time motherfucking World Champion in the World Championship Federation? Because I have heart, Chambers. I have the biggest mother fucking heart out of anyone on this damn roster. You know why? Because I am STILL. FUCKING. HERE. NOBODY on this roster has been through as much SHIT in this fucking company than I have. But here I am on top of the fucking throne, again, because not one mother fucker out there has more heart than me. Understand that, kid? Understand that you jobbing jobber?
You are not my test. I am tested my friend. I am proven. I can sit at ringside if I fucking want to, do you understand? I am not the one who NEEDS to win. I could lose this match and be in the main fucking event NEXT WEEK. Do you understand what that is like, KID? No. No you don’t. You have no clue what its like to be me. You have no clue what its like to be. And with the fucking shitty attitude you have, you never will. Not with that piss poor attitude you have.
You think because you have a couple of wins under your belt, you can compete against me? You think because you have won some title belt that you are somehow better than me? “I won my belt faster” what the fuck does that mean? You won a lesser title belt in less time than I won my SECOND world title? Wow guy, cool accomplishment. I remember when I was new and I used to tell people ‘I won the tag titles faster than anybody yar yar”. Here is the truth. I don’t care. Nobody cares. Nobody cares what you have done.
Getting up from sitting on the top of the platform, he moves his way over to the railing that ran along the back on top of the half pipe. He jumped up and sat on the top bar, looking down on the sleek curvature of the pipe.
Jeff Purse: All anyone cares is what you can do in the ring. That’s it. I’ll tell you what kid, you have some talent. I am going to give you that, you definitely know the basics of wrestling. You know how to whip people, you know how to do a hip toss, and wow, I saw you DDT someone, and it was done the way DDT’s are supposed to be done. That is great. You know how to work in the ring, just as much as any other wrestler. So then what? Whats next?
I know whats next for you kid, you keep heading down this fucked up road you are headed. You lose this match, that’s for sure. Then you try to prove yourself against Slane, because he seems to be the guy you decided to go after, which, I know you don’t realise this, is a mistake. Slane is one of the baddest mother fuckers in this place, and he will not hesitate to teach you a lesson that you so deserve. You will keep trying to test yourself against guys you are not ready to face, till you lose your belt, probably to Zombie McMorris, and then drift into obscurity until nobody knows who you are, you will never be on top, you will never be ‘perfect’ and you will be all alone. Is that the route you want to choose? Think about it.
He begins kicking his legs a bit, before they were resting on the middle bar of the railing, now they just hung free.
Jeff Purse: James ‘The Game’ Chevalier. What is that, French? Are you Canadian or French, or both? I know them Qubecions like to fuck around if you don’t speak any French. Or maybe you are from France. You were born in Portland, so I am going to say you are not from France. But maybe that’s where your lineage leads you to, eh? France. Les Miserables was a great show. I saw it, loved, cried at it, then saw the movie. The movie is nothing like the play, as much as they try, and while they try really hard, the movie cannot be anything like the actual stage play.
You know why? Because in theatre everything you are seeing is HAPPENING in the moment. Anything, ANYTHING could go wrong, but at the same time everything can go right. With a movie, well, once you have seen it once, you have seen it. Nothing ever changes. Oh sure you might notice something you didn’t notice before, but nothing ever really changes. It’s always just…Russell Crowe and Hugh Jackman singing songs at each other. They also have to cut a lot out of movies, taking out of every musical to movie adaptation, the essence that is the heart of the musical itself.
Why am I talking about this, you ask? Because all of this is true in something else, there, James. Because wrestling, professional, amateur, indie, it all is like a fucking stage production, don’t you agree? You have the main players, in Les Mis its prisoner 24601 Jean Valjean running from Javert over the course of 33 years. 33 years! Holy shit no way. Yes way, though, my friend, yes way. Jevert never actually catches Prisoner 24601. Their story spans over the years, they are each others antithesis, as Javert says in a song, ‘it is either Valjean or Javert’.
He smiles and slides off the bar of the railing, now just leaning against it and looking at the camera.
Jeff Purse: You need someone like this to get you through the wrestling world, James. I have mine. His name? Nathan von Liebert. He will be back, I am sure, but for now, I reign supreme over him, until I banish him back to the depths of hell from which he came. And I bring this up James because you are new here, you don’t know know a lot of the history that has taken place here James. But you are a step above Mr. Chambers. Because James, you have your opposite. You have your heel. You have your antithesis. Im not going to tell you who, that’s no fun.
Anyway, back to my original point, Javert eventually kills himself, Valjean dies, yadda yadda. Here is what I am trying to say, in a long winded way I suppose. This kind of heart that these two have, this kind of anger, this kind of determination, that’s what makes great wrestlers. James, you have it, you can be it, but you aren’t it yet.
I have worked since day one to make a name for myself. I have faced difficult opponent after difficult opponent to get to where I am today. I have defied the odds. I have risen to the top. I have showed the naysayers that I am capable. I have been through literally everything. I have done it all. I have won the championships, I have won the big matches, I have helped run the company, I have managed, I have been injured I have done everything. I am the embodiment of what it means to be a WCF superstar. And I don’t take the word ‘superstar’ lightly. You are not a superstar James.
You are not ‘The Game’. Not yet at least. I know, you call yourself that, but its just not very true. You should call yourself ‘Almost the Game’ or ‘So Close to Being The Game’. Haha. But I understand, you are shooting for the stars. Those stars, though, kiddo, me. Well, perhaps kiddo is not the wrong word, you are a year older than me. I mean that just has to hurt, right? Because, you know, I am a year younger than you, but just…incredibly more successful. Like, incredibly more successful. Holy shit how much more successful I am than you. Fuck, you came up through the Indies, and I was good enough to skip all that fucking bullshit and came right to the fucking show.
I mean you have done a lot since you have been here. You beat Thomas Bates, the big beastly man who most resembles the Pokemon Snorlax. And then you beat the Hardcore wonder, the mother fucking bad ass who cheaply attacked my boy Scarecrow, Mikey eXtreme. Those guys are no joke. They are tough opponents. I never would have guessed that you beat those guys. So far, I am impressed. Here is where your career gets rocky.
Jeff walks over to the edge of the platform he is standing on and plops himself down on the ledge, dangling his feet right over the curve of the half pipe.
Jeff Purse: The next match you have is a six man tag match. A budding star such as yourself, hot on a winning streak, should have gotten the pin in that match. But you didn’t…you didn’t. You took your own momentum away from you when you let Stuart Slane get that pin. Because he didn’t need it, he is established he is loved…you? Nobody knows who the fuck you are.
Back when I was first starting, I was also in a six man tag…the first one I was in here. Of course, mine meant a lot more than yours, but it was Me, Nathan von Liebert, and Night Rider vs Corey Black, Oblivion, and Frank Patrick Venable. Do you know what happened in that match, James? No, of course not, cause you weren’t there, you didn’t do your research, and you haven’t heard me talk about it before. I put Corey Black through a table, James. I pinned Oblivion for the win, who was a former WCF World Champion at the time. And look at me now, James.
My point here is that you have to be able to bring it when it matters. James, you proved that your not ready yet. You can’t bring it when it matters. Not yet anyway. I have no doubt that you will eventually get there, but right now? No. Now is not your time. Now is my time. Now is the time for Jeff Purse to once again prove why he deserves to be on top. It’s a new era of WCF, and its my fucking job to lead it, understand? THIS SHIT RESTS ON MY SHOULDERS! I am the guy who will return WCF to what it was, not you, not Chambers, and not Slane. Jeff mo’fukkin Purse. Because I am better. Period. End of story.
Jeff slides down the pipe, as he has done so many times in the past, and lands laying at the bottom of the pipe, or directly in the middle, however you would wanna word it yourself. He stares up at the sky.
Jeff Purse: Do you know why I respect Stuart Slane more than anyone else on the roster right now? Because Stuart Slane realized his OWN faults and reached out to change what he knew was not working for him. He changed because he knew he had to, and he knew it was the right thing to do. Stuart Slane is a hell of a human being. Who else could actually say that they could spot the thing that is holding them back and actively reach out and change it? Not many. And if you can, you automatically become a fucking hell of a guy or gal in my opinion.
Slane has had quite a history when it comes to WCF. Climbing that ladder only to get so close to his goal, only to fail. Its tragic really. Think of it this way, every time, EVERY TIME you were about to achieve everything you have ever wanted in this entire world, the one thing you wanted, and you fail. EVERY TIME. I don't know what thats like, but its awfully tragic. Its like there is a chemical makeup written into the biology of Stuart Slane to get almost get to that point and then just fall. I mean, look at his past.
He won mediocre titles here and there, and had great runs with them, and then he would face someone like Steve Orbit, or Jonny Fly, and he would just fall flat. A man who should have already won the World Championship in his life, but unfortunately his fate just wont let him. A man who seemingly his whole life he was a scout. He was a scoutmaster. It had to be something that he truly fucking loved, because he STILL did it while he was wrestling. Do you understand what a fucking commitment that is?
I loved riding BMX. Not only did I love it, but I was the best at it. I was very, very good. Hell, everything I have is because of those years that I made a name for myself in the extreme sports world. Some of the guys I met there are my best friends to this day. I regularly have dinner with Dave Mirra. It was thrilling, it was competitve, it was fufilling, and I quit that so I could wrestle. Thats how much of a time commitment wrestling is. You need to devote your whole self to it. You need to put one hundred and mother fucking ten percent to wrestling.
Jeff leans up on the curve of the half pipe, looking directly across him at the other side. It had a small smudge in the gleam of the finish. He took a hanky out of his back pocket.
Jeff Purse: I mean, don't think I am saying I gave up my life for wrestling. Because my real life didn't start till the first day I stepped through that curtain to, thats right, All the Small things, my original entrance music. Anyway, the point I am getting at is that Slane had success even though he was a scoutmaster. And what happened to that? He was disowned by the fucking scouts by the scoutmaster general. Which, honestly I didn't know was a real thing. Who would have thought?
But that there is his downfall. Scoutmaster Stuart Slane never had the focus to be able to compete at the level that I did. New and improved Stuart Slane still doesn't have the focus. He will, one day. One day I will accompany that big bear to the ring, because him and I are tight now, and he will defeat someone for the title, and he will hold that title high over his head, and I will be fucking glowering with pride and happiness for this fucking guy.
Jeff starts rubbing the smudge out of the gloss of the finish on the pipe.
Jeff Purse: But now is NOT his time. Blast is not the time for Stu to hold that fucking belt over his head. Sorry buddy. This is still my time. And Stu is going to give me everything that he has, I know, and I am going to give him everything I have right back. And because of me and Slane, this match is going to be one of the most epic title matches there has been in recent memory. We are both going to go hard. And thats the way its supposed to be done. With the competitors going as fucking hard as they can, getting in that ring and beating the shit out of each other.
Slane and I are going to do that. I am going directly after him. The other two? Fuck them. I don't care as much about them. Are they threats? Meh. Stuart? Yes. He is my main focus and I can't stress it enough that him and I have such a respect for each other that I know he is going to come at me just as tough as I do him. But this is where you get into the technicalities of wrestling. This is where you seperate those who are destined for greatness, and those who just fall short.
And thats you Stu. You are going to fall short. Because the plain and simple fact is that I can out wrestle you. Oh sure, Slane is a big mother fucker. He hits me too many times and I am down for the fucking count. But what Slane will have to watch for is my speed, my charisma, and my mother fucking Spoke. I can run circles around Slane, I can dodge and duck his strikes better than anyone else he has ever gone against. Its a proven fact that I can. I have backed these facts up thousands of times. Ask Gravedigger. Ask Jonny Fly. Ask Nathan von Liebert. Jeff Purse is fucking fast.
Which means that I will kick the shit out of your face at a fucking moments notice. You don't see the spoke coming until you are watching the fucking tape back. And you know it Stu. You know that that kick comes out of no where. You know that ninety percent of the people who get it do not see it coming. Its the way I have made it. People think I have gone soft because I went through a period where I had bigger things on my mind so I was losing matches. But not anymore Stu. Its unfortunate that you have to be in the match where I mother fucking show up. But if I don't, whats the point to being the champion? Something I need you to learn Stu. A lesson I will beat the fuck into you. Because I respect you, Slane. Because I know that one day it can be you.
He has finally rubbed the smudge out of the pipe and replaces the handkerchief in his back pocket, first folding it in a way that all the sides were even. He looks up at the camera.
Jeff Purse: WCF, I am back. I am back to being the fucking ass kicking, mid air flipping, fire starting, insane stunt doing mother fucker I have always been. I am not going to sit around and watch this influx of new people take over what should be The Jeff Purse era. I am on my own for the first time since I came to this federation. If it wasn't Pantheon, it was Night Rider, or Cryogenix, or any number of people I knew had my back. In this one, I am truly alone for the first time, and I am the WCF Champion. There is no Night Rider to be my tag partner. There is no Cryogenix. There is, for the first time, no Pantheon. Its just Jeff Purse.
There is no Corey Black anymore. There is no Jay Omega. There is no Alex Richards, or Chelsea Armstrong. No Polar Phantasm, no Steve Orbit, no Jay Price, no Skylar Striker, no Johnny Reb, no sign of Brad Kane or Bobby Cairo. No Nightmare. There is no Jonny Fly. My new team? Kari Kendall, Patrick Gage Purse, and me, Jeff Purse. For the first time in my career, and I will tell you something, its the best fucking team I have ever had. I am the luckiest mother fucker alive, and that luck does NOT end on Sunday. Boys.....welcome to The Future.
He smiles at the camera, a sly side smile, as he turns on his heels and walks back through his yard to the house. The scene fades to black.
