Post by nothenorm on Jun 8, 2016 22:14:14 GMT -5
referee: 1..2...3!
for the 3rd time in as many weeks, DEE NORM, has lost a title match in which he not only stole the show, but was one moment away from being crowned "NEWWWWW .... CHAMPION!" this ate at NORM.
interviewer: to the right of me is former #1 contender, dee norm... dee this is your 3rd consecutive loss in the month of April, to JD GEORGE, thats got to eat at you knowing each and everytime you have wrestled him, you've been that much closer to becoming champion?
norm: you're damn right, jeff! or whatever the hell your name is! i am sick and...
interviewer: ...I'm a girl
norm: ...you want a cookie? anyway, did you see the way I lost jeff?! I had my pinky finger on the bottom rope!
interviewer: ..."you want a cookie?"
norm: (sarcastically) haha, real cute, I'll tell you what I want jefe, that's Spanish for Jeff! I want the world title, and I want to SUE!
interviewer: who would you sue?
norm: ...Idk EVERYBODY! I'm suing the ref, I'm suing JD, I'm suing YOU too JEFF! I'm suing anybody who can't help me attain the TITLE! (storms off)
as the locker room became empty, dee just sat there, thinking about how close he was to becoming CHAMPION. as he has his head down, with a towel draped over his head, he hears foot steps. its CLARENCE FALLS III (yes, you say the whole name), norms longtime friend and manager, whose baseball career came to an end due to an ACL tear...
falls: alright norm, pick your head up my brother! I just got off the phone with OUR attorney!
norm: ARE WE SUING?!
falls: ...no
norm: well then I don't wanna hear it! I want everything JD has, I got ROBBED. it'd be nice to do the ROBBING for once! ya know... for a guy who gets booed by the...
falls: wait a HAAAWWWTTT second! I got an idea!
norm: lay it on me bro juice!
falls: 2 words homeboy! IDENTITY. THEFT.
norm: ...isn't that illegal?
falls: what're you?! a cop or something? EVERYBODY knows its only illegal IF you get CAUGHT! (smugly grins)
norm: ...damn, you right you right! how are we gonna go about this?
falls: don't you worry about it. I. GOT. THIS. let your big bro, CLARENCE FALLS III, handle this!
norm: ...but I'm like, 5 months OLDER than you...
falls: ...who's taller though?
norm: ... you?
falls: ALRIGHT THEN! (pounds chest)
3 BUSINESS DAYS LATER
falls: alright, I got his license, ID, social security number, credit cards, pictures of relatives I'm guessing, and a gift card to chick-fil-a, that I will be keeping...
norm: ...how?
falls: how else? JD fell asleep in the locker room shredding some important papers
norm: really?
falls: yeah! Idk how you never beat that guy, he's an idiot
norm: ...shut up. anyway, how are we gonna go about this?
falls: ...good question
norm: YouTube how-to video?
falls: ...there's no way there's a how-to video on identity....
norm: FOUND IT!
THE NEXT WEEK (IN THE RING)
commentator: OHHHH, JD goes to the top rope
NORM SPRINTS TO THE RING AND SHOVES JD OFF THE TOP ROPE!!!!!
commentator: what the hell?! DEE NORM, just ruined this perfectly good match!
norm: (PANTING) ...I bet... all of you idiots in this crowd, and watching at home, are wondering... "what the hell does this guy want again?"... well I'll tell you... I came here to claim MY title.
crowd: BOOOOOOO
norm: camera man, bring your ass into this ring. now what I have for you all, is DOCUMENTED PROOF... that I am your WORLD CHAMPION. CF3, come on down and show theses people what I am talking about!
CLARENCE FALLS III HEADS TO THE RING
jd george: wait a second jackass! I AM THE WORLD CHAMPION! me, JD GEORGE, anyone not named JD GEORGE, cannot be champion.
falls: now, hold on "JD", if that is your real name! what I have here is documentation of a name change, you see... dee will no longer be known as DEE... ladies gentleman, this man to my right IS now JD GEORGE! and if you don't believe me, the GM can confirm it, and as far as I'm concerned, you have no name!
no name: what the hell is going on?!
(jd) norm: THIS! (SUPERKICKS NO NAME, AND RAISES UP THE WORLD TITLE)
TO BE CONTINUED
for the 3rd time in as many weeks, DEE NORM, has lost a title match in which he not only stole the show, but was one moment away from being crowned "NEWWWWW .... CHAMPION!" this ate at NORM.
interviewer: to the right of me is former #1 contender, dee norm... dee this is your 3rd consecutive loss in the month of April, to JD GEORGE, thats got to eat at you knowing each and everytime you have wrestled him, you've been that much closer to becoming champion?
norm: you're damn right, jeff! or whatever the hell your name is! i am sick and...
interviewer: ...I'm a girl
norm: ...you want a cookie? anyway, did you see the way I lost jeff?! I had my pinky finger on the bottom rope!
interviewer: ..."you want a cookie?"
norm: (sarcastically) haha, real cute, I'll tell you what I want jefe, that's Spanish for Jeff! I want the world title, and I want to SUE!
interviewer: who would you sue?
norm: ...Idk EVERYBODY! I'm suing the ref, I'm suing JD, I'm suing YOU too JEFF! I'm suing anybody who can't help me attain the TITLE! (storms off)
as the locker room became empty, dee just sat there, thinking about how close he was to becoming CHAMPION. as he has his head down, with a towel draped over his head, he hears foot steps. its CLARENCE FALLS III (yes, you say the whole name), norms longtime friend and manager, whose baseball career came to an end due to an ACL tear...
falls: alright norm, pick your head up my brother! I just got off the phone with OUR attorney!
norm: ARE WE SUING?!
falls: ...no
norm: well then I don't wanna hear it! I want everything JD has, I got ROBBED. it'd be nice to do the ROBBING for once! ya know... for a guy who gets booed by the...
falls: wait a HAAAWWWTTT second! I got an idea!
norm: lay it on me bro juice!
falls: 2 words homeboy! IDENTITY. THEFT.
norm: ...isn't that illegal?
falls: what're you?! a cop or something? EVERYBODY knows its only illegal IF you get CAUGHT! (smugly grins)
norm: ...damn, you right you right! how are we gonna go about this?
falls: don't you worry about it. I. GOT. THIS. let your big bro, CLARENCE FALLS III, handle this!
norm: ...but I'm like, 5 months OLDER than you...
falls: ...who's taller though?
norm: ... you?
falls: ALRIGHT THEN! (pounds chest)
3 BUSINESS DAYS LATER
falls: alright, I got his license, ID, social security number, credit cards, pictures of relatives I'm guessing, and a gift card to chick-fil-a, that I will be keeping...
norm: ...how?
falls: how else? JD fell asleep in the locker room shredding some important papers
norm: really?
falls: yeah! Idk how you never beat that guy, he's an idiot
norm: ...shut up. anyway, how are we gonna go about this?
falls: ...good question
norm: YouTube how-to video?
falls: ...there's no way there's a how-to video on identity....
norm: FOUND IT!
THE NEXT WEEK (IN THE RING)
commentator: OHHHH, JD goes to the top rope
NORM SPRINTS TO THE RING AND SHOVES JD OFF THE TOP ROPE!!!!!
commentator: what the hell?! DEE NORM, just ruined this perfectly good match!
norm: (PANTING) ...I bet... all of you idiots in this crowd, and watching at home, are wondering... "what the hell does this guy want again?"... well I'll tell you... I came here to claim MY title.
crowd: BOOOOOOO
norm: camera man, bring your ass into this ring. now what I have for you all, is DOCUMENTED PROOF... that I am your WORLD CHAMPION. CF3, come on down and show theses people what I am talking about!
CLARENCE FALLS III HEADS TO THE RING
jd george: wait a second jackass! I AM THE WORLD CHAMPION! me, JD GEORGE, anyone not named JD GEORGE, cannot be champion.
falls: now, hold on "JD", if that is your real name! what I have here is documentation of a name change, you see... dee will no longer be known as DEE... ladies gentleman, this man to my right IS now JD GEORGE! and if you don't believe me, the GM can confirm it, and as far as I'm concerned, you have no name!
no name: what the hell is going on?!
(jd) norm: THIS! (SUPERKICKS NO NAME, AND RAISES UP THE WORLD TITLE)
TO BE CONTINUED
