Nobunaga Oda Kills Himself Following Disasterous Career Move

[Lilith]

It is with a happy heart that I inform you all that the newly appointed Assistant of Talent Relations, Nobunaga Oda, has killed himself after realizing how terrible he is.

I realize a lot of you will be asking yourselves "who is that?", to which I say... he was that ugly Japanese guy who occasionally hung out backstage. I know I didn't pay much attention to him either.

At least now he will either have angel wings or devil horns so that is one thing he managed to do which I haven’t yet done better than him I guess

Anyway best wishes to his family who are obviously happiful he's gone.

The undefeated and irreplaceable former Assistant of Talent Relations, Katherine Phoenix.

[Teo Blaze]

@mrsunshine

Oh no, I'm not falling for this again. Fool me 37 times, shame on you, fool me 38 times, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.



.....wait.

[Deleted]

@riddikuler

Ahh, brilliant! Typical Jap! I knew it was only a matter of time. Those japs off themselves left and right all the time FOH DAH ONNAH A' DEY'RE ANCESTAHS AND DAH NAME OF DAH EMPORAHH!!! Fuckin retards, the lot of them. Well, there's like a billion more of them, so if Henson really wants another jap senpai he can go get one for about a dime a dozen.

[Warbird]

@wcfwarbird

Did he commit Seppuku, or wasn't he man enough?

[Benjamin Atreyu]

@been_jammin

HAHAHA! ANOTHER FAKE NEWS STORY! HAHAHA! THESE NEVER GET OLD! HAHAHA! I COULD READ THESE ALL DAY! HAHAHA! YOU'RE SO ORIGINAL! HAHAHA! I SHOULD HANG MYSELF BECAUSE NOTHING WILL EVER TOP THIS!...

Get back to work.