Post by God King Dune on Feb 13, 2016 20:29:20 GMT -5
From space, we look down upon a blank sphere. Its mellow-gold hue gives it the appearance of a dull star at first glance, though as we near it, it’s planetary features come into view. Sand covers everything, and it comes to fill the screen as we continue rushing toward the surface. Soon a tiny figure can be seen walking upon the dunes below, and we finally slow as his familiar face comes into view.
Dune’s icy blue eyes flick toward the screen as he speaks through his mask.
Dune: Arrakis - the dune planet...how the fuck’d I end up here?
The ground quakes, and Dune halts and looks about tensely. He spies a rocky outcropping not far away, and after a deep breath, he sprints toward it. The ground quakes once more just before he leaps upon the stones. He remains quiet and still until silent calm takes over the alien desert. Dune’s eyes dart toward the screen.
Dune: I’ll tell you how: Dune. Well, technically it was via a device that folds time and space...but Dune’s the reason I was forced to use it. He’s here, and I’m here to find him. He’s an imposter, you see...and he’s come here to die.
The spice must flow Dune...and so must your blood.
You’re a real miserable piece of shit, you know that? I doubt you would. You’re oblivious to the world around you, or so it would seem. Since your return in November you’ve done nothing of significance, and yet you claim to be the top fighter in the world. You’re far from it, Dune. You’re a relic, doomed to suffer the same ragged fate that’s befallen every other who rose to fame and glory in this business. That’s one thing you aren’t oblivious to - you know damn well you’re washed up and reeling. And it only adds to the deep misery that defines your existence.
Your soul is dead, even if you have found your conscience. Koyaanisqatsi, right? You were burned beyond recognition, Dune. That’s what happens when you reach out for the stars.
Or was it just an unlucky break for you? Well consider me the same, because I’m going to finish the job and break all that’s left of you - your body - and leave you for dead this Sunday here on Arrakis.
A flash of yellow in the distance catches Dune’s eyes, and he shades them as he glares out at it.
We leave him and zoom toward the smudge of yellow on the horizon. It begins to take shape, until finally Dune comes into view. His yellow singlet compliments the bulge of his dick and balls as he finds the screen and begins to speak.
Dune: Where is this guy? I only brought enough sunscreen for the afternoon, and -
He cuts off as the ground quakes once more. Instead of finding shelter though, he chuckles and stomps on the ground.
Dune: What the heck’s goin on around here?!
He laughs and jumps around dumbly in his custard yellow onesie before finding himself.
Dune: They said there were worms beneath the crust, but I haven’t seen any of the little buggers. Shame too - I could use some grub right about now. I’ve got a fight with Dune coming up, and I hear he’s a real test. I just hope we have a good time together on Arrakis
You hear that, Dune? I’m gonna find you and we’re going to enjoy each other’s company. We’re prolly gonna be end up being pretty good friends. Prolly some of the best friends we’ve ever had in our lifes. Prolly some of the best friends we’ve ever had in our worlds. Are you thinking the same thing? Here’s what I’m thinking: I’ll be your dog - the four legged kind who stays true to the end. Just don’t beat me, Dune - don’t beat me too bad. All I wanna do is make you happy because I hear you’re pretty cool, and that’s cool man. Right on. Wait, what was I -
The ground quakes once more, and Dune dons an “Oh, you!” face and puts his hands on his hips. Suddenly the Wild Wild West theme comes to him and he begins singing it softly as he makes for a rocky outcropping in the distance - the same we left not long ago.
Dune: There’s a bit of shade...I don’t want to get sunburnt. Which reminds me...you like my onesie? When the costume lady asked me what color best suited a man like me, I didn’t hesitate to tell her yellow makes my world go ‘round. I’m hoping Dune likes it too. Maybe then I can wear it forever and ever. Wouldn’t that be a dream?
He stands back and twirls for the camera before a dark figure beside the rocky outcrop he walks toward comes into view. The oblivious, mustard yellow Dune finds the camera, though, as he continues toward the figure.
Dune: Some fans say I ought to reach out to Logn and Marc Mayhem and revive the Hot Dog Kings, what with my condiment-colored get up. It’s not a bad idea...just as long as I don’t have to be the ketchup. I hate ketchup. Well I like it on some things, but hot dogs? Come on. I’ll be the mustard to Dune’s hotdog any day, and hopefully today. Hopefully soon. I’m not sure how much longer I can take this heat.
Dune: Not much longer. It’s almost over.
Dune stops and looks up from his clothing to see Dune standing in the shade about twenty yards away. He smiles beneath his mask to see him.
Dune: Ahoy there!
Dune: The fuck are you wearing?
Dune:Ah...you like it?! I had the -
Dune: Take it off.
Dune: W-what? I thought you’d -
Dune: Take it off, it’s goddamn embarrassing.
Dune steps back in shock, a tear near to dripping from his eye.
Dune: I thought you’d appreciate the -
Dune: TAKE IT OFF!
Dune: Gahh!!
Mustard Dune screams as Dune reveals himself from the shadows. He strides toward him, and a warm, dark stain appears and grows from Dune’s aforementioned dick and ball bulge. He pleads as he approaches.
Dune: Please...not like this. I’ll take it, Dune. I’ll take it deep...but not here! Not on the dune planet of Arrakis!
Dune: You’ll take it, alright, but not the glorious buttsex you’re imagining. It’s the beating of a lifetime that awaits you. The spice must flow, my friend -
Dune’s eyes light up at the word.
Dune: So we are friends?! That’s all I want, Dune - to be your friend!
Dune: If not friends, our bonds are sure to strengthen these next few minutes. I develop a sort of kinship with every man or woman I step into the ring with, and our fight won’t be any different.
Dune: Not a real fight though, right Dune? We don’t have to hurt each other...
Dune: Stop backpedaling.
Dune: We’ll just -
Dune: Stand your ground.
After a few more slowed steps, he abides.
Dune: Ok...ok, friend.
Dune stops, and Dune stops as well. The two stare each other down, one with hard eyes, the other with soft, sorrowful ones. We zoom in on the latter. Out of nowhere, a bell sounds, and just as Dune's eyes fill with fear in reaction to the charging Dune, we cut to black.
Dune’s icy blue eyes flick toward the screen as he speaks through his mask.
Dune: Arrakis - the dune planet...how the fuck’d I end up here?
The ground quakes, and Dune halts and looks about tensely. He spies a rocky outcropping not far away, and after a deep breath, he sprints toward it. The ground quakes once more just before he leaps upon the stones. He remains quiet and still until silent calm takes over the alien desert. Dune’s eyes dart toward the screen.
Dune: I’ll tell you how: Dune. Well, technically it was via a device that folds time and space...but Dune’s the reason I was forced to use it. He’s here, and I’m here to find him. He’s an imposter, you see...and he’s come here to die.
The spice must flow Dune...and so must your blood.
You’re a real miserable piece of shit, you know that? I doubt you would. You’re oblivious to the world around you, or so it would seem. Since your return in November you’ve done nothing of significance, and yet you claim to be the top fighter in the world. You’re far from it, Dune. You’re a relic, doomed to suffer the same ragged fate that’s befallen every other who rose to fame and glory in this business. That’s one thing you aren’t oblivious to - you know damn well you’re washed up and reeling. And it only adds to the deep misery that defines your existence.
Your soul is dead, even if you have found your conscience. Koyaanisqatsi, right? You were burned beyond recognition, Dune. That’s what happens when you reach out for the stars.
Or was it just an unlucky break for you? Well consider me the same, because I’m going to finish the job and break all that’s left of you - your body - and leave you for dead this Sunday here on Arrakis.
A flash of yellow in the distance catches Dune’s eyes, and he shades them as he glares out at it.
We leave him and zoom toward the smudge of yellow on the horizon. It begins to take shape, until finally Dune comes into view. His yellow singlet compliments the bulge of his dick and balls as he finds the screen and begins to speak.
Dune: Where is this guy? I only brought enough sunscreen for the afternoon, and -
He cuts off as the ground quakes once more. Instead of finding shelter though, he chuckles and stomps on the ground.
Dune: What the heck’s goin on around here?!
He laughs and jumps around dumbly in his custard yellow onesie before finding himself.
Dune: They said there were worms beneath the crust, but I haven’t seen any of the little buggers. Shame too - I could use some grub right about now. I’ve got a fight with Dune coming up, and I hear he’s a real test. I just hope we have a good time together on Arrakis
You hear that, Dune? I’m gonna find you and we’re going to enjoy each other’s company. We’re prolly gonna be end up being pretty good friends. Prolly some of the best friends we’ve ever had in our lifes. Prolly some of the best friends we’ve ever had in our worlds. Are you thinking the same thing? Here’s what I’m thinking: I’ll be your dog - the four legged kind who stays true to the end. Just don’t beat me, Dune - don’t beat me too bad. All I wanna do is make you happy because I hear you’re pretty cool, and that’s cool man. Right on. Wait, what was I -
The ground quakes once more, and Dune dons an “Oh, you!” face and puts his hands on his hips. Suddenly the Wild Wild West theme comes to him and he begins singing it softly as he makes for a rocky outcropping in the distance - the same we left not long ago.
Dune: There’s a bit of shade...I don’t want to get sunburnt. Which reminds me...you like my onesie? When the costume lady asked me what color best suited a man like me, I didn’t hesitate to tell her yellow makes my world go ‘round. I’m hoping Dune likes it too. Maybe then I can wear it forever and ever. Wouldn’t that be a dream?
He stands back and twirls for the camera before a dark figure beside the rocky outcrop he walks toward comes into view. The oblivious, mustard yellow Dune finds the camera, though, as he continues toward the figure.
Dune: Some fans say I ought to reach out to Logn and Marc Mayhem and revive the Hot Dog Kings, what with my condiment-colored get up. It’s not a bad idea...just as long as I don’t have to be the ketchup. I hate ketchup. Well I like it on some things, but hot dogs? Come on. I’ll be the mustard to Dune’s hotdog any day, and hopefully today. Hopefully soon. I’m not sure how much longer I can take this heat.
Dune: Not much longer. It’s almost over.
Dune stops and looks up from his clothing to see Dune standing in the shade about twenty yards away. He smiles beneath his mask to see him.
Dune: Ahoy there!
Dune: The fuck are you wearing?
Dune:Ah...you like it?! I had the -
Dune: Take it off.
Dune: W-what? I thought you’d -
Dune: Take it off, it’s goddamn embarrassing.
Dune steps back in shock, a tear near to dripping from his eye.
Dune: I thought you’d appreciate the -
Dune: TAKE IT OFF!
Dune: Gahh!!
Mustard Dune screams as Dune reveals himself from the shadows. He strides toward him, and a warm, dark stain appears and grows from Dune’s aforementioned dick and ball bulge. He pleads as he approaches.
Dune: Please...not like this. I’ll take it, Dune. I’ll take it deep...but not here! Not on the dune planet of Arrakis!
Dune: You’ll take it, alright, but not the glorious buttsex you’re imagining. It’s the beating of a lifetime that awaits you. The spice must flow, my friend -
Dune’s eyes light up at the word.
Dune: So we are friends?! That’s all I want, Dune - to be your friend!
Dune: If not friends, our bonds are sure to strengthen these next few minutes. I develop a sort of kinship with every man or woman I step into the ring with, and our fight won’t be any different.
Dune: Not a real fight though, right Dune? We don’t have to hurt each other...
Dune: Stop backpedaling.
Dune: We’ll just -
Dune: Stand your ground.
After a few more slowed steps, he abides.
Dune: Ok...ok, friend.
Dune stops, and Dune stops as well. The two stare each other down, one with hard eyes, the other with soft, sorrowful ones. We zoom in on the latter. Out of nowhere, a bell sounds, and just as Dune's eyes fill with fear in reaction to the charging Dune, we cut to black.
