Post by Danny Vice on Mar 13, 2007 13:30:21 GMT -5
The scene reopens with Jimmy Vice again dressed as James Lipton. Same suit, same set-up, but it seems like it is going to be a second taping of Inside the Wrestlers Studio.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Recently, we brought you a truly special person…a man who is a multiple World Champion…and two-time winner of the most prestigious battle in the history of the WCF…Logan. Now…today…is the man who dawns a new era in the WCF…the man who has triumphed over adversity…and silenced the critics eternally…the current World Champion…Jack of Blades.
The applause track hits once again as Danny Vice steps on stage, mirroring Jack of Blades in appearance this time. A sadistic and clown-like smile anoints his face as he is dressed head to toe in black. His boots look like they could withstand artillery fire, and has a drawn on playing card of a Jack with a knife in hand. He carries a long with him what looks like a ventriloquists puppet, that is undoubtedly to represent Jesper Reisert, Jack of Blades’ somewhat of a pet/slave.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Sir, your reputation precedes you yet again. To be in the presence of a World Champion is truly life-altering.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: The gentle touch of your euphemisms are as superfluous as they are decorous.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Tell me, my dear friend, a little about your childhood.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Dignified, sir, purely dignified. Tell us your plans for the future of your title reign.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: In order to elongate my unconditional dominion as the iconic wrestler in the WCF, I have fully acknowledged as well as sanctioned my duty to promote my sadistic and somewhat pestilent attitude within the confines of the ring.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Usually…I don’t even know what you’re saying sir.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: Intermittently, neither do I. What’s that Jesper?
Danny leans in toward the doll of Jesper Reisert and listens intently.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: You don’t say. Truly?
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: What is your charming man-slave saying Mr. Blades?
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: What is that Jesper? You wish to see what color the intestinal tract of Mr. Lipton is? You maniacal dimwit! How coarse of you!
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: (laughing) Devious and dastardly. You are a sight to behold! We shall return back after this commercial break.
The fake applause returns once more as the camera fades out…
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Recently, we brought you a truly special person…a man who is a multiple World Champion…and two-time winner of the most prestigious battle in the history of the WCF…Logan. Now…today…is the man who dawns a new era in the WCF…the man who has triumphed over adversity…and silenced the critics eternally…the current World Champion…Jack of Blades.
The applause track hits once again as Danny Vice steps on stage, mirroring Jack of Blades in appearance this time. A sadistic and clown-like smile anoints his face as he is dressed head to toe in black. His boots look like they could withstand artillery fire, and has a drawn on playing card of a Jack with a knife in hand. He carries a long with him what looks like a ventriloquists puppet, that is undoubtedly to represent Jesper Reisert, Jack of Blades’ somewhat of a pet/slave.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Sir, your reputation precedes you yet again. To be in the presence of a World Champion is truly life-altering.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: The gentle touch of your euphemisms are as superfluous as they are decorous.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Tell me, my dear friend, a little about your childhood.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Dignified, sir, purely dignified. Tell us your plans for the future of your title reign.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: In order to elongate my unconditional dominion as the iconic wrestler in the WCF, I have fully acknowledged as well as sanctioned my duty to promote my sadistic and somewhat pestilent attitude within the confines of the ring.
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: Usually…I don’t even know what you’re saying sir.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: Intermittently, neither do I. What’s that Jesper?
Danny leans in toward the doll of Jesper Reisert and listens intently.
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: You don’t say. Truly?
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: What is your charming man-slave saying Mr. Blades?
Danny Vice as Jack of Blades: What is that Jesper? You wish to see what color the intestinal tract of Mr. Lipton is? You maniacal dimwit! How coarse of you!
Jimmy Vice as James Lipton: (laughing) Devious and dastardly. You are a sight to behold! We shall return back after this commercial break.
The fake applause returns once more as the camera fades out…
