bORN tHIS wAY (PART I)

[Tiffany White]

PROMO #4 - bORN tHIS wAY (PART I)

I don't believe in true love. Not one bit.

Whenever I engage in sexual romps with strangers, as I did with Annie, a woman I had picked up in Philly, it was purely for the physicality. Nothing more, nothing less. And that's why i really like Annie as a sexual partner, because in my conversations with her at The Franklin Bar (a bar which, according to Google, is "a swank speakeasy with craft cocktails) she confided in me she held the same feelings towards love. Which naturally led me to pursuing her further, and almost like that...BAM. Hotel room. Nakedness. Tittiiiiiies.

After we did the deed, however, I got...that feeling. That feeling that comes to you in the middle of night and keeps you awake for hours. Not even Annie's sweet ass sleeping next to me could lull me back to bed. I wanted to toss and turn to try and get in a comfortable position, but I didn't want to disturb Annie in any way. Finally, after a while of struggling to go to sleep, I gave up on that venture and sat up, quickly pulling on a pair of panties and a plain old white t-shirt. In the darkness I walked into the kitchen and flipped on the lights, and began scrounging around, finally grabbing a hold of a fresh bottle of wine. I had gotten it at the bar thinking I'd drink it the next day, but I through that idea out the window and opened the bottle right then and there. This wasn't no supermarket type shit neither, this was, according to the bartender, grown in one of the most legit vineyards in the country. The good stuff. There weren't any wine glasses readily available, but I wouldn't need any. I flipped the lights back off, sat down on the bed and began to drink straight from the bottle.

A few minutes after, I felt a stir in the bed as Annie woke up.

Annie: Can't sleep, babe?

Tiffany: Got a lot on my mind. Figured a drink would help me get to bed.

Annie: What's the matter? You can tell me.

Tiffany: With all due respect, I don't think it'd be something you'd care much to listen to.

Annie: This have to do with that WCF thing you were talking about back in The Franklin?

Tiffany: Mmhmm. That and a bit more.

Annie sighed, then softly giggled.

Annie: Look, I know that we're more then likely never to see each other again after tonight, and I accept that fact, in fact it's probably for the best that that happens. But Tiffany, if there's something that's bothering you, and you need someone to talk to, I'd be more then willing to be your ears.

Tiffany: Really?

Annie: Really.

I took another big gulp of wine, wiping some off my lips afterward, and offered some to Annie.

Annie: I'm good, girl.

I nodded, and began piecing the story together in my head.

Tiffany: I told you about the whole Chance von Crank business, right?

Annie: Yeah, redneck fuckboy with self-importance issues. What about him?

Tiffany: I didn't tell you about the girl he knocked up, did I?

Annie: No, but the way you're talking makes me scared to hear about it.

Tiffany: Yeah, well...he had this girl, this poor girl, and he basically used her as his sex slave. He got her preggo, she tried to hide it from him, he got mad...threats of abortion were made.

Annie: Oh my god.

Tiffany: Told you you wouldn't like it.

I got off the bed and made my way to the window, taking a good look at Philadelphia at night. It's beauty made talking about things easier, in a way.

Tiffany: Luckily I got a hold of her, took her as far away from that prick as I could. I've got her hiding out right now, got her staying at my old home...the Orphanage home.

Annie: Orphanage? Tiffany you never told me your parents were dead.

Tiffany: Oh no, they're still alive. Just dead to me, for all intents and purposes. No...this is a different type of orphanage...

---

It was seven or eight years ago at this point. I was eighteen years old. The first thought that popped in my head when I woke up was that I suddenly wasn't as thirsty as I remembered being not five minutes ago. As my vision slowly began to come back to me, it began to dawn on me that I was laying down in a bed and not laying half dead in the desert as I had recalled. It wasn't the most comfortable bed ever, felt more like cushioned wood then a spring mattress, but it was better then nothing. I could make out two figures near me, both men.

Man #1: -so then I turned to her and said...

Man #2: Hold that thought Kenny darling, I think our guest is starting to come to!

Kenny: So it would seem Jason! Let's check up on her.

The two men came closer to me, I still couldn't manage to make out their faces.

Jason: Rise and shine, hun! You gave us quite a scare out there, we thought you would've died on us!

Tiffany: Wh-who are you people? Where am I? Have I been kidnapped?

Kenny: Only if you consider two gay men saving your life from a slow death in the desert kidnapping! Which correct me if I'm wrong Jay-Jay, but I don't think it is.

Jason: Not at all babe. Trust us girlie, whatever you were running from out there, you're safe here. You got a name?

Tiffany: T-Tiffany.

Jason: Tiffany, what a cute name. Good to meet you Tiffany, I'm Jason and the sexy piece of ass next to me is Kenny.

Kenny: Oh come on, I'm more then just ass Jay-Jay. I've got a personality to go with it!

Jason: Oh hush. To answer your other question Ms. Tiffany, you're at a wonderful little establishment called Mama Louise's Orphanage. And correct me if I'm wrong, but judging by the license plate on that car of yours you're all the way from California, aren't you?

Tiffany: Yeah, California.

Jason: Well if you don't mind me asking, what's a cute young woman like you doing so far away from home.

Tiffany: I don't have a home any more. That car was the last bit of home to me, and now that's probably gone too.

Jason: Damn, we got another runaway here Kenny. She'll fit in well with the others.

Tiffany: I hope you don't think I'm staying here. Once I get a good meal in me and get my car gassed up I'm getting the hell out of here.

Kenny: And where exactly are you headed to, hun?

Tiffany: I...I don't know! Just not California, that's for damn sure.

Jason: What's so bad about Cali? I've been there a bunch, great place.

No words came out my lips. I was done talking to these clowns, and wanted to leave as soon as possible.

Jason: Okaaaaaaay then, if you wanna just be quiet then that's on you. But just so you're aware, we DO have space for you to stay, no matter how long you do, if you so choose.

Again, silence. Jason nodded in understanding, and motioned to Kenny that they should go. The two men finally made their exit, and I was left alone. Finally.

---

Annie listened intently to the story I was weaving out of my old memories. She seemed to be getting more and more engrossed in the tale.

Annie: Why were you so mad back then, babe?

Tiffany: Well, to be blunt about it...I didn't have the best senior year of high school. I was outed as gay, and back then if shit like that got out...then you can kiss any chance of acceptance out the window. People were so hateful back then. Nowadays everyone and thy're dog is gay so no one bats an eye, but back then, that shit was scandalous.

I took another generous swig of wine, then made my way back to the bed. The bottle was about halfway empty, by the end of the night it'd be all gone. I climbed in, trying to get as relaxed as possible, and Annie put her arms around me in a half sleepy embrace.

Annie: Well babe, I hope you know I love you just the way you are.

Tiffany: I know you do, haha. But it was a much different story back then.

More memories began coming to me, memories of senior prom...no, no I don't to go over that. Too painful. I began talking about something much more general then that one single night.

Tiffany: The thing I remembered the most about that time were how cruel the boys at my school were towards me. They took every opportunity they could to call me a "dyke whore" or a slut. The bible thumpers always looked at me and sneered, calling me "unnatural" and "dirty." One asshole even had "LESBO" spray painted on the door to my car, like he had wanted to advertise to the world just who exactly I was. Don't even get me started on how my parents took it.

Annie: Don't worry hun, I won't.

She leaned in and laid a passionate little kiss on my cheek, almost as if to say "it's okay." I smiled, then took another swig. Annie was probably the most passionate one night stand I had had in a long, long time. And on a night like this, I really needed it. I try to pride myself on showing as little emotion as possible to strangers, my whole life I felt the need to shield every ounce of feelings lest I look weak. But this night was the first night in a long time I could feel tears coming on, though I did my best to stop them. God, when was the last time I cried? Senior prom? Probably.

Tiffany: Annie, when I joined this WCF business, I knew people would have preconceived notions about me going in. Any time a lesbian pops in, it's always as eye candy, meant for nothing more then to be a pretty young thing to look at, either that or to act as a damsel in distress for the stalwart babyface to save from the dastardly heel. Worse, a lot of times the chicks aren't even gay, just pretending to be for the titillation of teenage boys. People thought that of me when I came in, saying "Oh, she's just doing it for attention, she isn't really like that." They fail to realize that this REALLY is who I am. I couldn't fake this shit if I tried.No, people like Chance von Crank, those motherfuckers are too caught up in their own prejudice to even give a shit about me.

All those insults and slurs, sure it hurt my feelings, who wouldn't get their feelings hurt about it? But it also pissed me off. It let in a little pit of rage I had honestly never felt before. I took their words and used it to fuel the fire even more. So every time Chance von Fuckboy opens his inbred little redneck mouth and calls me a carpet muncher, he brings back all those old memories, all that rage. Only now I have an outlet to let all that anger out...his face.

Chance is one of the most pathetic little fucks I've seen so far in the WCF. The guy has a superiority complex only someone like Napoleon would be proud of, and with the hatred to go with it. Only Napoleon actually had smarts to go along with his arrogance. Chance act without thinking of the consequences of his actions. For instance, fucking his girl Pixie without any thought of a thing like pregnancy occurring. No, he's all about taking the easy way out, in this aborting that poor kid. That's why I need that kid to survive, to serve as Chance's ultimate punishment. It's not a pro-life or pro-choice deal, it's a matter of Chance finally learning that life has consequences.

To Chance there is only one way of life, and that's the Chance way. But can you blame him? He's had absolutely no concept of love his whole life. He grew up with a drug addicted mother who struck him, and a father who he couldn't relate to at all. So how does he react? By disowning his father for who he is and going insane. In a way, and I absolutely hate to say this, but he minds me a lot of myself. Only he's what I would become if I let the hatred consume me. I suppose he's here to serve as a reminder to me.

Annie: A reminder of what?

Tiffany: That I can't let myself become that type of person. Because if I do...then I'll have failed at everything I've worked so hard to accomplish.

A silence.

Tiffany: Sorry for running my mouth so long...force of habit.

She giggled.

Annie: It's fine, I understand.

Another drink.

Annie: So if you don't mind me asking, whatever happened to you and that whole orphanage business?

---

I had been there for a few days, Jason and Kenny did their best to work with me, but I still wanted to get the hell out. Nothing they could say at that point was able to change my mind. I spent those days eating simple meals consisting mostly of sandwiches and chips and keeping to myself. In the course of these days I crossed paths with a few of the other teens living here, some my age, some younger. They always tried talking to me, and always seemed so chipper and happy. That is until I ignored them point blank and continued with my business, at which point the smile disappeared and they left me to my business, looking a little frightened in the process. A sad by-product of recent experiences with people my age. Had they interacted with me now I'd have been way more relaxed and happy to talk.

Finally, just as my bags were packed and ready to leave, Jason once again came to see me.

Jason: So I'm guessing you've made up your mind, eh hun?

Tiffany: Yup, I'm about to call the cab to get me out of here, I have enough cash to get me to the city. I'll find a job and work my way from there.

Jason: I see. I know you're probably not gonna change your mind anytime soon, just...someone wants to see you. Before you go.

Tiffany: Who?

Jason: Mama Louise herself. She wanted me to tell you to go see her, and after you do you're free to leave.

As much as I wanted to be gone already, I figured it wouldn't hurt to pay her a visit, so I let Jason guide me over to her office. He led me to a door at the very end of the hallway.

Jason: Here she is. Go on in, I'll be waiting for you to call your cab.

I nodded, and opened the door, stepping inside. Her office was quite well kept, a bookshelf wrapping around thee entire room filled to the brim with various books and other reading material. In front of me was a large, quite well made wooden desk, meticulously organized and neat. Sitting at the desk, it's back turned to me, was a leather chair, large black hair sticking out from behind it.

Tiffany: Are you Mama Louise?

Much to my shock, the voice that replied wasn't that of a woman...but of a man.

Mama Louise: The one and only darling.