Post by Biggs on Apr 7, 2007 22:23:38 GMT -5
"In just a couple of days I, "The Greatest" JJ Biggs, have the opportunity to become a double-champion! You see, as it's well-known, Outcast and I are going to step into the ring and settle a little problem. He's bringing the WCF People's Championship to the table and I'm bringing the WCF Television Championship. Each of us are arriving with a title that we call ours, but one of us is going to leave with nothing. It's quite sad, isn't it? Well, for Outcast, at least. I'm sure that man is training like there is no tomorrow thinking he has my number going into our match. He probably thinks he's going to use a victory over me to make it back to stardom in this company. Well, it's nice to see that he's thinking, but there is absolutely no way a victory over me is going to happen.
You see, I'm what people like to call a "true star." I have the talent. I have the charisma. I'm willing to do whatever is needed to get the victory, which usually isn't much. You, Outcast, are what people like to call a "fake star." You've had a couple of lucky breaks in your career that has enabled you to win your share of championship belts. But, you have to wonder, what exactly does holding a championship belt prove, anymore? For example, at one point, not too long ago, Thunder was a double-champion. Now, where is he? Oh, that's right. He's wrestling his ass off just to make sure he doesn't lose his job.
So, holding that WCF People's Title doesn't prove anything, Outcast. How you do in the same ring with me this Sunday will tell you just where you stand in this company. I want you to bring your "A" game, Outcast, if you have one, because I don't want any excuses after I beat you. So....
Every dog has its day, Outcast. And, this Sunday will be yours, my friend.
- "The Greatest" JJ Biggs
4/5/07
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"The Greatest" JJ Biggs, with the WCF Television Title around his waist, is sitting at the end of a long table inside of one of the many conference rooms located inside the building of Biggs Incorporated. He's wearing a pair of faded blue jeans and a self-promotional "The Greatest" shirt. Suddenly, the entrance to the room is flung open and Jake Hudson is standing there with a packet of papers in his right hand. He's sweating profusely as he quickly makes his way to where Biggs is sitting.
Jake Hudson: We have a problem.
"The Greatest" : Again? You just came to my a couple of weeks ago saying your cousin was having a hard time getting pregnant, but I took care of that. Is it your girlfriend this time or something? I could make some time in my busy schedule for her.
Jake Hudson: Listen, this isn't a time for games. The entire computer system just crashed.
"The Greatest" : What? What does that mean?
Jake Hudson: It means that every single one of your stores across the country aren't functioning right now. Also, it means that this entire building isn't functioning!
"The Greatest" : Is that bad?
Jake Hudson: Damnit! Yes, that is bad, JJ! It's very, very bad! You're losing thousands per minute!
"The Greatest" : Son of a bitch! How did this happen, Jake?
Jake Hudson: I don't know! Everything was normal up until fifteen minutes ago. Suddenly, every computer in the building died. And, because you wanted to save money, all of the computers for your separate stores were plugged into the same system! Everything's down. All of the stores are having to close their doors.
"The Greatest" : I'm holding you responsible, Jake. I made you Vice President and Chief Executive Officer because I thought you could handle it! Evidently, I was wrong.
Jake Hudson: We're working on finding the problem, JJ. Oh, and take a look at these papers. It's the projected money loss per hour that the system is down.
Jake thrusts the papers forward and "The Greatest" snatches them out of his hand and he looks at them. You can see the look of panic come across his face as he finishes looking at them.
"The Greatest" : Damnit! I'm fucking ruined!
The entrance to the conference room opens once again and this time it's Jose Jose. He's wearing the same janitor's suit he's always wearing and he's walking with his head down.
Jake Hudson: When did this piece of shit start working here?
"The Greatest" : I didn't feel like paying a janitor, so I brought him in. He cleans the building when he's not cleaning your gym. Hey, Jose, what the hell are you doing in my conference room when you should be cleaning the shit off the toilet seats?
Jose Jose: Jose Jose think he know why the system is out.
Jake Hudson: Why is it out then, Jose?
"The Greatest" : What? When the hell did you start speaking English?
Jose Jose: Jose Jose watched a lot of television. Surprisingly, some of the stuff is quite educating.
"The Greatest" : You're still a pile of worthless shit. Anyway, you said something about why the system is out. Why is it?
Jose Jose: Well, you see, Jose Jose was mopping the floor and he noticed a vacant computer. So, he wanted to check out some of the latest wrestling news. 'Cause, you know, Jose Jose has dreams of wrestling. So, he checked it out and suddenly a couple of girls making out caught his attention on the side of the page. So, Jose Jose clicked the link and the next thing you know all of the computers stopped working.
"The Greatest" : Why you fucking foreigner!
Biggs, who's obviously pissed off, charges in Jose Jose's direction. Now, Jose Jose is a Mexican, but he's not that stupid. He turns and he runs around the table. Biggs can run pretty fast when he's angry and he almost catches Jose, but Jose Jose jumps onto the table. Jake just stands where he has been and he's looking at this in disbelief. Biggs pounds on the table with his fist and he walks over to his telephone. He pushes the speaker button and he dials zero.
Sherry: Yes, Mr. Biggs?
"The Greatest" : Sherry, call immigration!
Sherry: What?
"The Greatest" : Call immigration! Are you deaf?
Sherry: Well, no. Why do you want me to call immigration? I've been trying to call people to get the systems running again.
"The Greatest" : You know what? You're fired! Get the fuck out of my building. I told you to do something, and you didn't do it.
Sherry: I was going to do it, sir. I just thought getting your business back up and running was the most important thing.
"The Greatest" : Why the hell are you still talking? I fired your ass. Hang up the fucking phone!
A loud static sound is heard as Sherry slams the phone. Biggs shakes his head in anger before glancing up and realizing that Jose Jose is within striking range. He grabs his leg and he trips him down. He pulls him close and then he grabs the receiver and he starts to wrap the wire around Jose Jose's throat. Jake immediately moves and he runs over to try to stop this.
"The Greatest" : I can't believe you, Jose Jose! You're an illegal alien! Jake and I stuck our necks out for you. We gave you a home. We gave you a job. And this is what you give me in return? I'm going to choke your ass to death! You smell like you've already been dead for a couple of months, anyway!
Jake Hudson: JJ, I know he made a huge fucking mistake. He shouldn't have even been on the computer. But I think you're losing it, man. You don't want to kill him.
"The Greatest" : Oh, no. I do.
Jake is starting to panic as Jose Jose seems to be slowly slipping again. Jake thinks about trying to punch Biggs, but he realizes that may not be the best idea. However, a decent idea does come to him. He quickly picks up the telephone from the table and he slams it against the back of JJ's head! JJ's grip on the wire around Jose's neck weakens and he falls to the floor. Okay, so maybe it wasn't the best idea, but it got the job done. Jose Jose is coughing frantically, trying to get his air back.
Jose Jose: Jose Jose thanks you!
Jake Hudson: Shut the hell up! Get the hell out of here! You piece of shit.
Jose Jose: But, Jose Jose is sorry?
Jake Hudson: Well, I'm about to drive my boot up your ass and I won't be sorry! Now, get the hell out of here before he wakes up and tries to kill you again.
Jose Jose once again hangs his head as he slowly leaves the conference room. Jake sighs as he takes a seat at the table and he glances down at the unconscious JJ Biggs before taking another look at the packet. The scene slowly fades away leaving just a black screen remaining.
You see, I'm what people like to call a "true star." I have the talent. I have the charisma. I'm willing to do whatever is needed to get the victory, which usually isn't much. You, Outcast, are what people like to call a "fake star." You've had a couple of lucky breaks in your career that has enabled you to win your share of championship belts. But, you have to wonder, what exactly does holding a championship belt prove, anymore? For example, at one point, not too long ago, Thunder was a double-champion. Now, where is he? Oh, that's right. He's wrestling his ass off just to make sure he doesn't lose his job.
So, holding that WCF People's Title doesn't prove anything, Outcast. How you do in the same ring with me this Sunday will tell you just where you stand in this company. I want you to bring your "A" game, Outcast, if you have one, because I don't want any excuses after I beat you. So....
Every dog has its day, Outcast. And, this Sunday will be yours, my friend.
- "The Greatest" JJ Biggs
4/5/07
----------
"The Greatest" JJ Biggs, with the WCF Television Title around his waist, is sitting at the end of a long table inside of one of the many conference rooms located inside the building of Biggs Incorporated. He's wearing a pair of faded blue jeans and a self-promotional "The Greatest" shirt. Suddenly, the entrance to the room is flung open and Jake Hudson is standing there with a packet of papers in his right hand. He's sweating profusely as he quickly makes his way to where Biggs is sitting.
Jake Hudson: We have a problem.
"The Greatest" : Again? You just came to my a couple of weeks ago saying your cousin was having a hard time getting pregnant, but I took care of that. Is it your girlfriend this time or something? I could make some time in my busy schedule for her.
Jake Hudson: Listen, this isn't a time for games. The entire computer system just crashed.
"The Greatest" : What? What does that mean?
Jake Hudson: It means that every single one of your stores across the country aren't functioning right now. Also, it means that this entire building isn't functioning!
"The Greatest" : Is that bad?
Jake Hudson: Damnit! Yes, that is bad, JJ! It's very, very bad! You're losing thousands per minute!
"The Greatest" : Son of a bitch! How did this happen, Jake?
Jake Hudson: I don't know! Everything was normal up until fifteen minutes ago. Suddenly, every computer in the building died. And, because you wanted to save money, all of the computers for your separate stores were plugged into the same system! Everything's down. All of the stores are having to close their doors.
"The Greatest" : I'm holding you responsible, Jake. I made you Vice President and Chief Executive Officer because I thought you could handle it! Evidently, I was wrong.
Jake Hudson: We're working on finding the problem, JJ. Oh, and take a look at these papers. It's the projected money loss per hour that the system is down.
Jake thrusts the papers forward and "The Greatest" snatches them out of his hand and he looks at them. You can see the look of panic come across his face as he finishes looking at them.
"The Greatest" : Damnit! I'm fucking ruined!
The entrance to the conference room opens once again and this time it's Jose Jose. He's wearing the same janitor's suit he's always wearing and he's walking with his head down.
Jake Hudson: When did this piece of shit start working here?
"The Greatest" : I didn't feel like paying a janitor, so I brought him in. He cleans the building when he's not cleaning your gym. Hey, Jose, what the hell are you doing in my conference room when you should be cleaning the shit off the toilet seats?
Jose Jose: Jose Jose think he know why the system is out.
Jake Hudson: Why is it out then, Jose?
"The Greatest" : What? When the hell did you start speaking English?
Jose Jose: Jose Jose watched a lot of television. Surprisingly, some of the stuff is quite educating.
"The Greatest" : You're still a pile of worthless shit. Anyway, you said something about why the system is out. Why is it?
Jose Jose: Well, you see, Jose Jose was mopping the floor and he noticed a vacant computer. So, he wanted to check out some of the latest wrestling news. 'Cause, you know, Jose Jose has dreams of wrestling. So, he checked it out and suddenly a couple of girls making out caught his attention on the side of the page. So, Jose Jose clicked the link and the next thing you know all of the computers stopped working.
"The Greatest" : Why you fucking foreigner!
Biggs, who's obviously pissed off, charges in Jose Jose's direction. Now, Jose Jose is a Mexican, but he's not that stupid. He turns and he runs around the table. Biggs can run pretty fast when he's angry and he almost catches Jose, but Jose Jose jumps onto the table. Jake just stands where he has been and he's looking at this in disbelief. Biggs pounds on the table with his fist and he walks over to his telephone. He pushes the speaker button and he dials zero.
Sherry: Yes, Mr. Biggs?
"The Greatest" : Sherry, call immigration!
Sherry: What?
"The Greatest" : Call immigration! Are you deaf?
Sherry: Well, no. Why do you want me to call immigration? I've been trying to call people to get the systems running again.
"The Greatest" : You know what? You're fired! Get the fuck out of my building. I told you to do something, and you didn't do it.
Sherry: I was going to do it, sir. I just thought getting your business back up and running was the most important thing.
"The Greatest" : Why the hell are you still talking? I fired your ass. Hang up the fucking phone!
A loud static sound is heard as Sherry slams the phone. Biggs shakes his head in anger before glancing up and realizing that Jose Jose is within striking range. He grabs his leg and he trips him down. He pulls him close and then he grabs the receiver and he starts to wrap the wire around Jose Jose's throat. Jake immediately moves and he runs over to try to stop this.
"The Greatest" : I can't believe you, Jose Jose! You're an illegal alien! Jake and I stuck our necks out for you. We gave you a home. We gave you a job. And this is what you give me in return? I'm going to choke your ass to death! You smell like you've already been dead for a couple of months, anyway!
Jake Hudson: JJ, I know he made a huge fucking mistake. He shouldn't have even been on the computer. But I think you're losing it, man. You don't want to kill him.
"The Greatest" : Oh, no. I do.
Jake is starting to panic as Jose Jose seems to be slowly slipping again. Jake thinks about trying to punch Biggs, but he realizes that may not be the best idea. However, a decent idea does come to him. He quickly picks up the telephone from the table and he slams it against the back of JJ's head! JJ's grip on the wire around Jose's neck weakens and he falls to the floor. Okay, so maybe it wasn't the best idea, but it got the job done. Jose Jose is coughing frantically, trying to get his air back.
Jose Jose: Jose Jose thanks you!
Jake Hudson: Shut the hell up! Get the hell out of here! You piece of shit.
Jose Jose: But, Jose Jose is sorry?
Jake Hudson: Well, I'm about to drive my boot up your ass and I won't be sorry! Now, get the hell out of here before he wakes up and tries to kill you again.
Jose Jose once again hangs his head as he slowly leaves the conference room. Jake sighs as he takes a seat at the table and he glances down at the unconscious JJ Biggs before taking another look at the packet. The scene slowly fades away leaving just a black screen remaining.
