Post by Kyle Kemp on Jan 17, 2016 5:53:07 GMT -5
We pick up on Kyle Kemp who is standing in the weight room in his home gym and is standing in the corner as the camera films him. He is dressed in black shorts, a blue tank top and Nike workout shoes. He smiles as he begins.
So as everyone knows I am once again in a tag team match this Sunday against Joseph Maliginaggi and my newest nemesis Andre Jensen. First and foremost I want to thank Seth Lerch for the opportunity to face Joseph for the….what is it…..3rd week in a row? You don’t know how happy this makes me. I get a 3rd chance to take down what is a supposed star in this company. The previous two times things have went a little differently then I had planned but this week things will be different. They must be different.
That’s right Joseph! I’m excited to face you! Just like I’m excited to kick that fucking smile off your face. Every week it seems these days I see that fucking smile and you just can’t help it. You smile at me like I’m some kind of nobody and it drives me nuts. You and I both know that I’m more than just some doormat and no matter how well you do against me, I’m going to leave a mark that will last. All it takes is one Back to the Minors and you will remember my name forever.
And that’s what it is all about isn’t it Joseph? Being someone that everyone knows. Don’t lie. I know you. You’re nothing more than a fame whore and while some people look at your little “feud” with Dune and think that all of that put together is dramatic and passionate, I look at it and it makes me want to puke. Everything you do is for the spotlight. Look at your World Title reign! You just wanted everyone to talk about your damn short title reign so you allowed that to happen. That is where we differ. I wouldn’t let that masked fat pale piece of shit Dune take the World Title from me. Not only that but I wouldn’t allow my kid to be taken from me either!
That’s right I went there. Why? Because you should be ashamed of yourself. You’ve exploited the death of your son as a way to get these people to talk about you and it sickens me. Your kid dies and suddenly you are Mr. Emotional and the best dad ever! You’re just so sad that you had to change your name. Sorry Joseph but Kobe Bryant invented that move after he switched numbers after his rape case. I’ll give him credit, his fucking jersey numbers sky rocketed but tell me this Joseph. Why drop the Flash part and throw on a name that no one in the stands can pronounce or spell!? Are you that stupid? These are the questions I ask myself but thankfully for you, they are nowhere near the questions I ask myself about fucking Andre Jensen.
Andre Jensen….Jesus Christ….are you for real? That’s what I’ve been asking myself since our little encounter at Slam. I thought they were playing a joke on me when I was told that I was going to go out there and do the little show you put together. I didn’t realize you were a real person but apparently you wanted to walk out there and try to put yourself over.
Newsflash Jensen….it didn’t work. You’re still the same loser that you were last week and you will be the same loser the next week and the week after that. I mean just look at you man. You were rolling dice before you asked me questions! Don’t you see how crazy that is? That’s what I don’t understand about all of these nerds that do this fantasy crap. It’s not fantasy football because that’s real damn it. You get to see players play on the field. Not dress up like elves or fucking gnomes or whatever it is that you decide to be during one given time.
There is one thing that I want to know though….did anyone else see Jensen drink his magic little formula and suddenly he hulked out on me? Was it just me that saw that? I demand a drug test! I demand that we find out what kind of game Andre Jensen is playing because it sure as hell isn’t fair. I wish I could just drink some Sierra Mist off looking shit and suddenly I’m the world’s strongest man. I’m on to you Jensen and I will not rest till you are brought to justice for cheating.
With that said I must say that Oblivion and I are looking forward to this matchup on Sunday because in the end a Jock and a Monster are greater than a Kardashian and a loser and that will continue because I’m Kyle Kemp and I’m better than you!
Kemp winks at the camera and walks off.
So as everyone knows I am once again in a tag team match this Sunday against Joseph Maliginaggi and my newest nemesis Andre Jensen. First and foremost I want to thank Seth Lerch for the opportunity to face Joseph for the….what is it…..3rd week in a row? You don’t know how happy this makes me. I get a 3rd chance to take down what is a supposed star in this company. The previous two times things have went a little differently then I had planned but this week things will be different. They must be different.
That’s right Joseph! I’m excited to face you! Just like I’m excited to kick that fucking smile off your face. Every week it seems these days I see that fucking smile and you just can’t help it. You smile at me like I’m some kind of nobody and it drives me nuts. You and I both know that I’m more than just some doormat and no matter how well you do against me, I’m going to leave a mark that will last. All it takes is one Back to the Minors and you will remember my name forever.
And that’s what it is all about isn’t it Joseph? Being someone that everyone knows. Don’t lie. I know you. You’re nothing more than a fame whore and while some people look at your little “feud” with Dune and think that all of that put together is dramatic and passionate, I look at it and it makes me want to puke. Everything you do is for the spotlight. Look at your World Title reign! You just wanted everyone to talk about your damn short title reign so you allowed that to happen. That is where we differ. I wouldn’t let that masked fat pale piece of shit Dune take the World Title from me. Not only that but I wouldn’t allow my kid to be taken from me either!
That’s right I went there. Why? Because you should be ashamed of yourself. You’ve exploited the death of your son as a way to get these people to talk about you and it sickens me. Your kid dies and suddenly you are Mr. Emotional and the best dad ever! You’re just so sad that you had to change your name. Sorry Joseph but Kobe Bryant invented that move after he switched numbers after his rape case. I’ll give him credit, his fucking jersey numbers sky rocketed but tell me this Joseph. Why drop the Flash part and throw on a name that no one in the stands can pronounce or spell!? Are you that stupid? These are the questions I ask myself but thankfully for you, they are nowhere near the questions I ask myself about fucking Andre Jensen.
Andre Jensen….Jesus Christ….are you for real? That’s what I’ve been asking myself since our little encounter at Slam. I thought they were playing a joke on me when I was told that I was going to go out there and do the little show you put together. I didn’t realize you were a real person but apparently you wanted to walk out there and try to put yourself over.
Newsflash Jensen….it didn’t work. You’re still the same loser that you were last week and you will be the same loser the next week and the week after that. I mean just look at you man. You were rolling dice before you asked me questions! Don’t you see how crazy that is? That’s what I don’t understand about all of these nerds that do this fantasy crap. It’s not fantasy football because that’s real damn it. You get to see players play on the field. Not dress up like elves or fucking gnomes or whatever it is that you decide to be during one given time.
There is one thing that I want to know though….did anyone else see Jensen drink his magic little formula and suddenly he hulked out on me? Was it just me that saw that? I demand a drug test! I demand that we find out what kind of game Andre Jensen is playing because it sure as hell isn’t fair. I wish I could just drink some Sierra Mist off looking shit and suddenly I’m the world’s strongest man. I’m on to you Jensen and I will not rest till you are brought to justice for cheating.
With that said I must say that Oblivion and I are looking forward to this matchup on Sunday because in the end a Jock and a Monster are greater than a Kardashian and a loser and that will continue because I’m Kyle Kemp and I’m better than you!
Kemp winks at the camera and walks off.
