The People's Lightwork

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Part 1: The People's Lightwork

The scene opens up on Teo Del Sol and Spencer Adams gearing up before their first tag match together. Teo is stretching out as Spencer is taping up his wrists. The two turn to the camera in cheesy unison.

Teo: Oh hey! We didn’t see you th-

Spencer: We can’t start it off that goofy. Come on now. We need everyone to take us seriously!

Their is a slight pause as Spencer clears his throat.

Spencer: Nah, I’m just fucking around. In fact, I’m in a pretty good mood this week, definitely nothing like the level of seriousness I had going into that match against Hatcher and do you wanna know why Spencer Adams is feeling so relaxed, so easy going this week?

Teo turns his head a bit, awaiting a response.

Spencer: It’s because I realized something after that little attack from Adam Young. I realized that those attacks, they don’t fucking matter. No matter how many times I get hit with some bullshit cheap shot, nothing is stopping me from walking into One just like nothing is stopping me from winning the TLC match. Me and Vic both know damn well that the same old shit that’s been thrown our way isn’t going to work in that situation. All of those tactics they’ve been employing to try to keep the antidote down, they won’t end the match in two weeks. Instead, they will just come as part of the package that the match gives us.

Now this week? This week is simply a warm up match for The People’s Choice if we’re being perfectly honest. This is one of those cases where booking knows that this group is red fucking hot and fueled by the power of the WCF galaxy. They just sort of had to book our opponents for this week simply to have them be on the card, where as they understood the power that the fans have, they understood loud and clear that we bring our own brand of entertainment to this industry that can’t be found anywhere else. Sure, there are plenty of other stars who get that support and earn our collective respect, but we are a special type of energy that is a breed of it’s own.

We’re looking at a week that is simply one of the final stages before our group walks into One and walks out as “The One”, the one group to stand on top, proud of our accomplishments and honored by those who have and will continue to stand behind our movement. At WAR, the people witnessed the start of something powerful and this is one of those weeks where keep that momentum. It’s as simple as that. There will always be those doubters in the locker room who try to step to us and tell us that we aren’t shit, who will try to point at the losses and the roadblocks while turning a blind eye to the handful of major highlights that we’ve pulled off in such a short period of time.

Now..about who we’re up against this week. Is there talent? Will there be a challenge? Fucking right there will be, but this is a tag team match and I don’t think I have to type it out in some red, Adam Young sized font to remind anyone of what that entails. The heart of every competitor is always an important factor, but tag team action isn’t just about what we do as individuals, it’s about brotherhoods, the very thing that keeps The People’s Choice chugging along with such a high rate of success. It’s me and Teo this week against people who don’t have those established brotherhoods and likely never will.

Bernard Core and Night Rider? Are we really supposed to believe that these two are capable of coexistence for even a fraction of a second? I mean, this is clearly the team set up to serve the same role that Dem Gentlemen will serve in a couple weeks. They’re the other team, the team that everybody knows will not be picking up a victory this week. We have the definition of structure and the guy who believes that he’s the definition of anarchy against two oddballs and two guys who actually hold championship gold together. So take a look real quick and let me know which of these things is not like the other.

Night Rider, I don’t know what I can tell you that I haven’t already made adamantly clear before, but since I find myself matched up against you for what seems like the millionth time to me, I’ll spell it out real simple for you, you fucking suck. At this point, you have to just know that you’re the same old regurgitated “tough guy” that we’ve seen fail time after time around here. There’s nothing special or standout about anything that you bring to the business. We’ve seen people do what you try to emulate far better than you could ever hope to. You’re like a strange mix between a poor man’s Gonzo Murdoch and an even more impoverished man’s Doc Henry. Let’s just call you what you really are, Adam Young version one point five, a slightly better version of a man with a broken gimmick playing some broken ass records.

Oh, and what is that lame ass, bargain bin, anarchy gimmick you’re going with all about anyway? What is it that you’re rebelling against? Being talented? Are you out here trying to make it seem like you’re just too cool for school, like you suck the fun out of the room by sucking it up in the ring as if being a total loser is somehow much more acceptable if you try to make it seem like the cool thing to do? How long have you known you were just this unbelievable, badass anarchist? Did you step to Mrs. Rider like “I’m all about anarchy, mom! You can’t tell me what to do?!” An anarchist is the kind of person who sparks a revolution which is something that you definitely have not done up to this point and likely never will do in the remaining years of your very forgettable career in the WCF. You’re not anarchy, you’re conformity, conformity to a generic “tough guy” complex possessed by insecure roid ragers with shriveled up genitals. You’re about as much of a symbol for anarchy as Green Day is a symbol for punk rock.

I suppose you stood for something different as one of the mind’s behind the AoD too, huh? A handful of DRG ripoffs? I really don’t like that about you. You’re one of those assembly line types. Your actions, they just seem so rehearsed and robotic that I can’t hardly stand it. You’re like that fucking guy who they have at meet and greets when nobody else is available. Do you think that anybody would ever treat Night Rider’s wrestling as anything more than a bathroom break if you didn’t have decent opponents? You’re literally the last option for everything other than helping people hate themselves a little on the inside for having witnessed the garbage that you try to pass off as performing. You’re not unique in the least fucking bit. Hell, you don’t even do anywhere near a half decent job of playing the cringeworthy, tough guy role that you try so hard to make us all buy into.

That’s why you won’t win and will drag that uptight bastard Bernard Core down with you, because you lack..well basically everything that you need to compete at a respectable level. Unfortunately for you, there’s no petty feud between your lady and Thomas Bates anymore, no platform for you to try to use to elevate you. While The People’s Choice is busy stealing these shows, you’ll be the low man on the totem poll who is forever banished to “the kid’s table”. There’s nothing in you that resembles any razzle dazzle. Night Rider is the forgotten folder in a filing cabinet, the artifact in wrestling history that will be forever skipped over like a leaf in a nature museum. Face it, you’re an empty shell, a fucking husk left behind as your shit excuse for a group fell apart. So go ahead and try your luck, because I promise I’ll have you setting the record as the saddest thing to ever happen to professional wrestling.

Now, onto Mr. Bernard Core. Does anybody believe that this man will have an impact in a match against The People’s Choice? This isn’t the type of rookie with a hunger that he feels in the pit of his stomach to go out there and turn some heads. No, this man is the kind who would want them to look away from the action in the ring. If anybody ever feels like hating another person, this is the fucking guy to settle on. It’s just this level of fucking smugness, I can’t wait to slap you in the mouth for the way that you carry yourself. While Night Rider is the perfect person to train against for facing Adam Young, Bernard Core is the perfect guy to train against for facing Raymond Hatcher.

I sense this sort of mindset with you where you think that you’ve been the fucking man from the get go. That style or lackthereof where you adjust your tie and walk around like the most capable man in the locker room is why you're such a buzzkill to all of us and it’s also exactly why you’ll probably be hanging out with your partner Night Rider at the bottom of the card for quite awhile. It’s this idea that you have it all figured out like you’re the one bringing the lessons to us like we’re the school kids when really, you’re the one who should have your pen and paper out, ready to take notes on the shit that people like Spencer Adams and Teo Del Sol are going to teach you about scratching and clawing your way up to the very top in the WCF.

The other team in this match might not be at the disadvantage that Bernard Core and Night Rider are, but that’s not really saying much. A team made up of Zombie McMorris and Punkin, or Caliban, or Punkin Caliban is just a fucking trainwreck waiting to happen. Punkin knows it, Zombie knows it, and every other single person with a damn brain knows that it’s going to fall apart before they even step foot in the same ring. Do I think that either one of them really cares about the fact that they won’t be able to function of a team? Probably not, but that’s where we come in and take advantage.

Punkin Caliban, the guy who wants to be Oblivion, and punk rock, and...a pumpkin. Is there a term for that fetish or are you just a special kind of fucking weirdo? For real though, is that your best attempt at putting yourself over? If so, I feel kinda sorry for you. It must be pretty depressing to walk around like that knowing that you got nothing up in that old noggin as far as packaging yourself goes. It’s like you got tired of rotting away (HAH I made a PUNkin) so you thought that being the crazed skitzo who struggles for control of his own mind and body would be the thing that got you over. Do you think people are so stupid that they’re just gonna eat up whatever you give them? This isn’t the late nineties or WCW, so stop parading around like something out of a Vince Russo wet dream.

It’s actually almost worst than that though, because I feel like I’m watching just this god awful lost member of Legion of Doom as you shout out everything you say to try to make it strike fear in our hearts. What a rush it must be to stomp down to the ring and job out to has beens like Oblivion, right? Maybe it’s just a complete waste of time for me to try to sit here and speak logically to a guy who thinks that he’s a fucking pumpkin. You might not know it yet, but after you’re waiting backstage with ZMAC and that coked up douchebag tricks your dumbass with Smarties after sniffing a fat rail like the shitty, washed up hardcore wrassler that he is, you’re going to be fucking squashed by yours truly in convincing fashion.

Which brings me to the one guy in this match that is proven, the guy that me and my boy Teo will be using to make yet another statement, Zombie McMorris. I remember talking before my first encounter with ZMAC about how his little good guy act was complete bullshit and who would’ve guessed I was right! Not much surprise there. We all knew that the glorified back alley junkie was a rotten bastard and he still is. You know what annoys me is guys like ZMAC who seem to have this idea in their minds that I’m the bad guy, that I’m somehow anything like guys like ZMAC for coming down to the ring and beating their ass for thinking that they’re gonna step on people like us, people who try to do good because oh I don’t know, it’s just a basic fucking concept to live by.

It’s fine though, whether I’m happy go lucky or full of piss and vinegar, I still put meaning behind proving to people like ZMAC that not only can I hang, but I can best them, that I can lay motherfuckers like that down for a three count. For as much shit as people talk about how I’ve lost a couple belts not long after winning them, how about guys like ZMAC? This fucking guy threw away a People’s Championship match against me and for what reason? To save fucking face because I was gaining the upper hand, beating your ass, and making you look like a damn fool? I guess this is just the week where we go up against a bunch of people who insist on showing you how super badass they are and how they care about nothing.

Now that’s not entirely true, is it? You’ve since gone on to win the vacated internet championship and proceed to revive a division that was slowly fading into obscurity ever since Alex Richards didn’t retain it in the Ultimate Showdown match. You showed everybody that old Zombie McMorris that they were trying to bring out of you, the one who looked dominant at what he was focusing on. That might be the one commendable thing that I’ve seen you do since I’ve been here, ZMAC. It’s the same thing that The People’s Choice did to the tag team and trios championships ever since we got our hands in them. We were the ones who reignited interest in both of those divisions and that’s something I’m damn proud of.

You’re all focused in on that one little niche that you were practically begging to lock yourself into and I get it, you direct your attention to that one thing so that you can just use the majority of your energy on being the greatest internet champion that there ever was. Not a terrible idea to go for. In a lot of ways, that’s sort of what we’ve been doing by reviving and pushing that idea of real teamwork. There’s still a big difference between guys like us and guys like you though and that’s the fact that we still come out and bust our ass and try to put on a great show and fight the good fight even when it doesn’t involve the gold. I’ve spent my entire career being a mule who carries those stresses and those pressures pretty damn well, it’s a big part of how I’ve come to build my brand, hard work and unmatched willpower every single time I hear the bell ring.

So that’s what we’ve got for this week then, huh? An actual team with actual team chemistry against four dysfunctional bastards who can barely manage to handle their own careers on a weekly basis? Now we’re not far from that first bell. It’s only a matter of time before this weird bunch of veterans and new faces gets to see firsthand what we’re all about and I honestly can’t wait to show these guys just how unlucky they got, to show them just how badly the booking team fucked them over when they decided to put them in a match against Teo Del Sol and Spencer Adams. Go ahead and lace those boots up if you’d like, it doesn’t really matter either way since you’ll be taking them right back off in a matter of a couple minutes. This is our playground, our fucking battlefield and every time somebody decides to step in the middle of it without being fully prepared, they’re doing a dance through a sea of active mines. Come on down, we’ll be waiting for the four of you.

Spencer smiles as the camera is turned off and the two men finish getting ready before heading out of the locker room.