Post by mexicant on Sept 16, 2006 4:35:09 GMT -5
It's been awhile, old friend......We've been through lots of good times......lots of the bad......But, ya really do make me feel like Indiana Jones and not the Nazi's I briefly rooted for.....I've thrown you all over the place, bled all over you, I even ran you through eight-foot flames for a surprise attack on..... “someone” .....but that's a different story told to the same people, even though I'd slit the d!ck's throught if it wasn't constantly exhaling stupid everywhere. "Fourth-Leaf," you have always come back to me like Jones’ hat, which is a great thing because you’re the sh!t! How I wish you could only steer me away from this terrible idea that can only become bad-luck for more than seven years!
Cross: We’ll be your managers!
Neo: ……..-……. -_____-
Gil: Yeah! We’ll be great at taking care of your money…….Neo, why did you hand me this loaded fire-arm?
Neo: It’s simple-plug me one for allowing this to happen.
Cross: But….. “Sir!” We just signed you with a sponsor who’s interested in your talent! It’s a great amount of money for our first business days as managers!
Neo: (sigh) Okay! How much will we make?
Gil: A jillion!
Neo: Bless you! Now tell me how much bigger my account will be?
Cross: That’s a….a….achoooew….*sniff* excuse me! You’ll be making one jillion. You should’ve seen Gil haggle! We only have to pay them 25 K!
I just had to ask to stop my murderous urges- Neo: …..Do you even know what the “K” stands for?
Cross: Uh……Er-A Killion?
Gil: You-man this guy is un-educated…..It stands for twenty-five hundred dollars. I’m sorry, Neo. Forgive him.
Cross: Oh, yeah! You were able to figure that a jillion had to be much more than a million! Man, we made out like bandits!
Gil: We sure did! Oh and by the way, you owe us for the fancy briefcases we had to partially steal from an “Office-Max” truck! They got a buckle and everything.
Neo: Inspecting the supplies Are-are those—Yup! Five Stars! …..So, Jesus Christ was a schitzo and God laughed at his followers…..then there’s me…..CUTTING MY SHAFT IN-TWO IS A BETTER SURPRISE!!
Cross: Y’hear that, Gil? He says that he’s not surprised about our eyes for top-rate merchandise! Neo hears police sirens and hopes they fade away
Gil: I know! He was yelling the statement with so much passion and grit that he MUST approve our managerness! Those sirens, of course, come closer
….And then it hit me…..Hit them!
Neo: I’m going to hit you……..
Fifteen minutes of hauling ass later
Neo: ……..Wait-Why am I listening to the “Benny Hill theme?” What a terrible idea when trying to make a get-away…….Now that the transportation problem has been fixed, let’s see if I can figure out your “doings” while I was out gettin’ booze and smokes. You didn’t “partially” steal them……why else would you have fourteen of them?!
Gil: eI can-b’leeve ‘ish. Yew-ere sho ‘appy a Cross, without warning, snaps Gil’s jaw back into place with a sickening sound ……….eeeeeeEEEEEUUOOO-SWEET-TEA-DRINKING-MOTHER-THERESA!!! Passes out from pain and painkillers
Cross: Tending to his swelled member What he was sayin’! We’re too good for you! I’m gonna piss blood for the next few weeks because I DID YOU A FAVOR?!!
Neo: Telling me what this “advertisement” deal is would be a “favor”-NOT cause us to be in massive debt due to your “Bush-like” qualities.
Cross: ……..You mean…..we didn’t…do you good?
Neo: (sigh) I’ll explain as soon as we get you two to a hospital……one a few states away, preferably.
…….I was wearing you all frikkin’ day……why-oh why-did this have to suddenly kick me where I kicked Cross?! Well, I guess we'll all figure this out once we get some medical attention for the both of them and try to heal our friendship along-or even after-the painful trip ahead.
Cross: We’ll be your managers!
Neo: ……..-……. -_____-
Gil: Yeah! We’ll be great at taking care of your money…….Neo, why did you hand me this loaded fire-arm?
Neo: It’s simple-plug me one for allowing this to happen.
Cross: But….. “Sir!” We just signed you with a sponsor who’s interested in your talent! It’s a great amount of money for our first business days as managers!
Neo: (sigh) Okay! How much will we make?
Gil: A jillion!
Neo: Bless you! Now tell me how much bigger my account will be?
Cross: That’s a….a….achoooew….*sniff* excuse me! You’ll be making one jillion. You should’ve seen Gil haggle! We only have to pay them 25 K!
I just had to ask to stop my murderous urges- Neo: …..Do you even know what the “K” stands for?
Cross: Uh……Er-A Killion?
Gil: You-man this guy is un-educated…..It stands for twenty-five hundred dollars. I’m sorry, Neo. Forgive him.
Cross: Oh, yeah! You were able to figure that a jillion had to be much more than a million! Man, we made out like bandits!
Gil: We sure did! Oh and by the way, you owe us for the fancy briefcases we had to partially steal from an “Office-Max” truck! They got a buckle and everything.
Neo: Inspecting the supplies Are-are those—Yup! Five Stars! …..So, Jesus Christ was a schitzo and God laughed at his followers…..then there’s me…..CUTTING MY SHAFT IN-TWO IS A BETTER SURPRISE!!
Cross: Y’hear that, Gil? He says that he’s not surprised about our eyes for top-rate merchandise! Neo hears police sirens and hopes they fade away
Gil: I know! He was yelling the statement with so much passion and grit that he MUST approve our managerness! Those sirens, of course, come closer
….And then it hit me…..Hit them!
Neo: I’m going to hit you……..
Fifteen minutes of hauling ass later
Neo: ……..Wait-Why am I listening to the “Benny Hill theme?” What a terrible idea when trying to make a get-away…….Now that the transportation problem has been fixed, let’s see if I can figure out your “doings” while I was out gettin’ booze and smokes. You didn’t “partially” steal them……why else would you have fourteen of them?!
Gil: eI can-b’leeve ‘ish. Yew-ere sho ‘appy a Cross, without warning, snaps Gil’s jaw back into place with a sickening sound ……….eeeeeeEEEEEUUOOO-SWEET-TEA-DRINKING-MOTHER-THERESA!!! Passes out from pain and painkillers
Cross: Tending to his swelled member What he was sayin’! We’re too good for you! I’m gonna piss blood for the next few weeks because I DID YOU A FAVOR?!!
Neo: Telling me what this “advertisement” deal is would be a “favor”-NOT cause us to be in massive debt due to your “Bush-like” qualities.
Cross: ……..You mean…..we didn’t…do you good?
Neo: (sigh) I’ll explain as soon as we get you two to a hospital……one a few states away, preferably.
…….I was wearing you all frikkin’ day……why-oh why-did this have to suddenly kick me where I kicked Cross?! Well, I guess we'll all figure this out once we get some medical attention for the both of them and try to heal our friendship along-or even after-the painful trip ahead.
