Post by Biggs on Oct 11, 2006 18:26:38 GMT -5
The sun is shining bright in the clear, blue sky in the city of Miami. The temperature is perfect; not too cold, not too hot. Most of the children, fresh off their day at school, are playing outside with their friends. Across the street from JJ's house, is a couple of children running through a sprinkler in their yard. They have happy expressions on their faces as they laugh and scream amongst each other. They are so happy, if you saw them, you would just want to grab a twelve gauge shotgun and blow their heads off. That's how happy they are...so happy, it annoys the hell out of you.
Anyway, JJ Biggs and Jake Hudson, after arriving back from "Jake's Gym" only about fifteen minutes ago, are sitting in JJ's living room. JJ has a bottle of Budweiser in his hand while Jake has a bottle of Gatorade. JJ takes a big, satisfying gulp from the contents of the bottle and he looks over at his long time friend and manager, Jake Hudson.
JJ Biggs: I'm bored.
Jake Hudson: I am, as well. Why don't we play "Scarface: The World Is Yours" on your Playstation 2. It's, in my opinion, the greatest game ever invented. I demand that every single person go out and buy that game! If you can't afford that game, then sell your girlfriend, wife, mother, sister, grandmother or whatever to a local pimp so you can get it!
Jake Hudson was given twenty dollars to conduct that unofficial promotional advertisement for the video game while at Game Stop the other day. Twenty dollars is twenty dollars, so of course he accepted.
JJ Biggs: Yeah, that game is awesome.
JJ Biggs, who received ten dollars for his small line, doesn't really like the game. If Jake Hudson heard him say he didn't like the game, you could bet your ass that Jake would snatch that beer bottle directly out of JJ's hand and shatter it over his previously injured skull.
Jake Hudson: We going to play?
JJ Biggs: Maybe later.
Jake Hudson: Okay.
JJ Biggs: Where's Kyle? I need another beer.
Jake Hudson: Are you trying to tell me that you haven't noticed that he hasn't been around since we returned to Miami after Slam? He left a note at the gym saying he is driving up to Canada for a Family Reunion.
JJ Biggs: He's from Canada?
Jake Hudson: Yes.
JJ Biggs: No wonder he smells funny all of the time.
Jake Hudson: Indeed.
JJ Biggs: Back to the earlier topic, Jake. What are we going to do? If I don't have anything to do, I might as well just go back to the gym.
Jake stares off into space for a moment, trying to think of something, but he isn't having much luck. He shrugs before taking a drink of his Gatorade. JJ sighs before finishing off the rest of his Budweiser. He throws the bottle over his shoulder and it shatters off of his wall.
Jake Hudson: I got it!
JJ Biggs: A beer bottle breaking off a wall made the idea suddenly come to your head?
Jake Hudson: Yeah. Let's do something, I don't know, original. It's around Halloween, right? We're going to go buy some white paint and we're going to paint your face a pale white. Then, the best thing, we're going to go and buy some of those special contacts that will turn your eye color red.
JJ Biggs: Why?
Jake Hudson: Because you're facing an Albino this week, JJ. So, after we get you all fixed up, you're going to have the opportunity to see how his life has been.
JJ Biggs: I don't want to.
Jake Hudson: Come on, it'll be fun.
JJ Biggs: Why don't you do it, then?
Jake Hudson: I have a phobia of eye contacts. It's weird, I know, but that means I won't be able to do it.
JJ Biggs: Fine.
Jake Hudson: Awesome!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
JJ Biggs, decked out with a pale white paint on his face and the red eye contacts, is sitting in the passenger seat of Jake Hudson's vehicle. They are currently in downtown Miami, where there are a lot of people walking down the street.
Jake Hudson: You look awesome.
JJ Biggs: Fuck you. What are we doing downtown?
Jake Hudson: Oh, I thought it would be awesome for you to walk up to a random person and introduce yourself as Neo, the Albino WCF professional wrestler. You can add on some funny lines, as well.
JJ Biggs: Are you serious?
Jake Hudson: Serious as a heart attack, JJ.
JJ Biggs throws his arms up in disgust as he exits the vehicle. He leans on the passenger door and he looks over at a smiling Jake Hudson.
JJ Biggs: This is bullshit.
At that very moment, a white pile of bird crap lands directly on JJ's left shoulder.
Jake Hudson: No, it's bird shit. Haha, anyway, I'll be waiting here.
JJ Biggs: Son of a bitch!
JJ walks away from the vehicle with an angry expression on his face. However, he notices a sexy female standing at the bus stop. Suddenly, he's no longer angry and he walks in her direction. He walks up behind her.
JJ Biggs // Neo: Hi, I'm Neo. I am an Albino professional wrestler from WCF. Not only that, I had herpes.
Woman: Ew!
The woman raises her purse over her head and she smacks JJ in the face with it. JJ tries to turn around and run, but she continues to chase him and smack him with her purse. JJ dives into the car and Jake takes off like a bat out of hell. The woman is still chasing the car, but out of no where the bus she was supposed to catch hits her.
Just kidding, I made that last part up, the woman calms down and she walks back to her bus stop. JJ Biggs, breathing hard, shakes his head.
JJ Biggs: Unbelievable.
Jake Hudson: Now that was funny!
JJ Biggs: No, it wasn't.
Jake Hudson: Yes, it was. Let's do it again. Just one more time, man. It was priceless.
JJ Biggs: Hell no, she tried to kill me.
Jake Hudson: Come on, man. I need this! I haven't had sex in seven months! I need some form of entertainment!
JJ Biggs: What the fuck? Dude, all right, but don't ever tell me anything like that again.
Jake Hudson: Why not? It worked.
JJ Biggs: Whatever.
Jake has a smile on his face as he pulls the vehicle over towards the curb. JJ sighs before exiting the vehicle and he slowly walks up the sidewalk. He's getting a lot of stares as he walks, so he tries to keep his head down to avoid the eye contact. Picking a random person as he approaches, JJ lifts his head up and he starts to speak to a woman who jumps back at the sight of JJ.
JJ Biggs // Neo: Hi, I'm--
JJ doesn't even get the opportunity to finish what he wanted to say, as the woman grabs his by the shoulders and knees him in the crotch. JJ, in a massive amount of pain, falls down to the ground. Now, as everyone passes him, they deliver a stiff kick to the body. JJ is trying to block the attack, but he isn't having much luck as they have now surrounded him. Jake backs the car up and he gets out. He runs over and he does his best to push everyone out of the way. He picks JJ up and he manages to get him to the car. The people, acting as if nothing happened, begin to walk down the street, again. Jake shakes his head as he gets into the driver's seat and continues driving.
Jake Hudson: You all right?
JJ Biggs: No, my sack is killing me.
Jake Hudson: You'll live.
JJ Biggs: Fuck you.
Jake continues driving, with a huge smile on his face, while JJ Biggs is in the passenger's seat grimacing in pain.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
"Neo, you Albino freak, I've had the opportunity to witness what you've had to go through your entire life. I have to admit, it isn't cool because the people are rude, but I don't really care. I'm normal, you're fucked up, that's just how life goes. Your life has been bad Neo but, it's going to get a lot worse when you step into the ring with me at Slam. I'm going to easily get the victory in this match because I am the best competitor this company has. You've been in this company before, but that doesn't matter, because you're just a thing of the past and I am the present. Not only am I the present, but I am the future of this company, as well. I am the sole possessor of the WCF Tag Team Championships and I haven't been defeated in quite awhile. So, Neo, I'm happy that you have the balls to agree to a match like this. But, I'm disappointed that you don't have more talent..."
Anyway, JJ Biggs and Jake Hudson, after arriving back from "Jake's Gym" only about fifteen minutes ago, are sitting in JJ's living room. JJ has a bottle of Budweiser in his hand while Jake has a bottle of Gatorade. JJ takes a big, satisfying gulp from the contents of the bottle and he looks over at his long time friend and manager, Jake Hudson.
JJ Biggs: I'm bored.
Jake Hudson: I am, as well. Why don't we play "Scarface: The World Is Yours" on your Playstation 2. It's, in my opinion, the greatest game ever invented. I demand that every single person go out and buy that game! If you can't afford that game, then sell your girlfriend, wife, mother, sister, grandmother or whatever to a local pimp so you can get it!
Jake Hudson was given twenty dollars to conduct that unofficial promotional advertisement for the video game while at Game Stop the other day. Twenty dollars is twenty dollars, so of course he accepted.
JJ Biggs: Yeah, that game is awesome.
JJ Biggs, who received ten dollars for his small line, doesn't really like the game. If Jake Hudson heard him say he didn't like the game, you could bet your ass that Jake would snatch that beer bottle directly out of JJ's hand and shatter it over his previously injured skull.
Jake Hudson: We going to play?
JJ Biggs: Maybe later.
Jake Hudson: Okay.
JJ Biggs: Where's Kyle? I need another beer.
Jake Hudson: Are you trying to tell me that you haven't noticed that he hasn't been around since we returned to Miami after Slam? He left a note at the gym saying he is driving up to Canada for a Family Reunion.
JJ Biggs: He's from Canada?
Jake Hudson: Yes.
JJ Biggs: No wonder he smells funny all of the time.
Jake Hudson: Indeed.
JJ Biggs: Back to the earlier topic, Jake. What are we going to do? If I don't have anything to do, I might as well just go back to the gym.
Jake stares off into space for a moment, trying to think of something, but he isn't having much luck. He shrugs before taking a drink of his Gatorade. JJ sighs before finishing off the rest of his Budweiser. He throws the bottle over his shoulder and it shatters off of his wall.
Jake Hudson: I got it!
JJ Biggs: A beer bottle breaking off a wall made the idea suddenly come to your head?
Jake Hudson: Yeah. Let's do something, I don't know, original. It's around Halloween, right? We're going to go buy some white paint and we're going to paint your face a pale white. Then, the best thing, we're going to go and buy some of those special contacts that will turn your eye color red.
JJ Biggs: Why?
Jake Hudson: Because you're facing an Albino this week, JJ. So, after we get you all fixed up, you're going to have the opportunity to see how his life has been.
JJ Biggs: I don't want to.
Jake Hudson: Come on, it'll be fun.
JJ Biggs: Why don't you do it, then?
Jake Hudson: I have a phobia of eye contacts. It's weird, I know, but that means I won't be able to do it.
JJ Biggs: Fine.
Jake Hudson: Awesome!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
JJ Biggs, decked out with a pale white paint on his face and the red eye contacts, is sitting in the passenger seat of Jake Hudson's vehicle. They are currently in downtown Miami, where there are a lot of people walking down the street.
Jake Hudson: You look awesome.
JJ Biggs: Fuck you. What are we doing downtown?
Jake Hudson: Oh, I thought it would be awesome for you to walk up to a random person and introduce yourself as Neo, the Albino WCF professional wrestler. You can add on some funny lines, as well.
JJ Biggs: Are you serious?
Jake Hudson: Serious as a heart attack, JJ.
JJ Biggs throws his arms up in disgust as he exits the vehicle. He leans on the passenger door and he looks over at a smiling Jake Hudson.
JJ Biggs: This is bullshit.
At that very moment, a white pile of bird crap lands directly on JJ's left shoulder.
Jake Hudson: No, it's bird shit. Haha, anyway, I'll be waiting here.
JJ Biggs: Son of a bitch!
JJ walks away from the vehicle with an angry expression on his face. However, he notices a sexy female standing at the bus stop. Suddenly, he's no longer angry and he walks in her direction. He walks up behind her.
JJ Biggs // Neo: Hi, I'm Neo. I am an Albino professional wrestler from WCF. Not only that, I had herpes.
Woman: Ew!
The woman raises her purse over her head and she smacks JJ in the face with it. JJ tries to turn around and run, but she continues to chase him and smack him with her purse. JJ dives into the car and Jake takes off like a bat out of hell. The woman is still chasing the car, but out of no where the bus she was supposed to catch hits her.
Just kidding, I made that last part up, the woman calms down and she walks back to her bus stop. JJ Biggs, breathing hard, shakes his head.
JJ Biggs: Unbelievable.
Jake Hudson: Now that was funny!
JJ Biggs: No, it wasn't.
Jake Hudson: Yes, it was. Let's do it again. Just one more time, man. It was priceless.
JJ Biggs: Hell no, she tried to kill me.
Jake Hudson: Come on, man. I need this! I haven't had sex in seven months! I need some form of entertainment!
JJ Biggs: What the fuck? Dude, all right, but don't ever tell me anything like that again.
Jake Hudson: Why not? It worked.
JJ Biggs: Whatever.
Jake has a smile on his face as he pulls the vehicle over towards the curb. JJ sighs before exiting the vehicle and he slowly walks up the sidewalk. He's getting a lot of stares as he walks, so he tries to keep his head down to avoid the eye contact. Picking a random person as he approaches, JJ lifts his head up and he starts to speak to a woman who jumps back at the sight of JJ.
JJ Biggs // Neo: Hi, I'm--
JJ doesn't even get the opportunity to finish what he wanted to say, as the woman grabs his by the shoulders and knees him in the crotch. JJ, in a massive amount of pain, falls down to the ground. Now, as everyone passes him, they deliver a stiff kick to the body. JJ is trying to block the attack, but he isn't having much luck as they have now surrounded him. Jake backs the car up and he gets out. He runs over and he does his best to push everyone out of the way. He picks JJ up and he manages to get him to the car. The people, acting as if nothing happened, begin to walk down the street, again. Jake shakes his head as he gets into the driver's seat and continues driving.
Jake Hudson: You all right?
JJ Biggs: No, my sack is killing me.
Jake Hudson: You'll live.
JJ Biggs: Fuck you.
Jake continues driving, with a huge smile on his face, while JJ Biggs is in the passenger's seat grimacing in pain.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
"Neo, you Albino freak, I've had the opportunity to witness what you've had to go through your entire life. I have to admit, it isn't cool because the people are rude, but I don't really care. I'm normal, you're fucked up, that's just how life goes. Your life has been bad Neo but, it's going to get a lot worse when you step into the ring with me at Slam. I'm going to easily get the victory in this match because I am the best competitor this company has. You've been in this company before, but that doesn't matter, because you're just a thing of the past and I am the present. Not only am I the present, but I am the future of this company, as well. I am the sole possessor of the WCF Tag Team Championships and I haven't been defeated in quite awhile. So, Neo, I'm happy that you have the balls to agree to a match like this. But, I'm disappointed that you don't have more talent..."
