Post by "The Sinner" Miguel Sanchez on Dec 9, 2006 13:28:54 GMT -5
The images of beige walls open up the scene. White curtains hang from the windows. Moonlight shines down into the room. A bookshelf stands on the fuzzy white carpet in the corner next to the window. A lamp light from across it standing on the bed stand next to the bed illuminates the room. Even the smallest light can illuminate a big room. Across the bed is an open white door. Not fully open, but slightly. Open enough to hear the water from the bathtub on the other side release from the faucet. On the bed sits Miguel Sanchez. He appears to be writing something down.
IT IS A SIN TO WRITE THIS. "Fading, falling, lost in forever. Will I find a way to keep it together. Am I strong enough to last through the weather? In the hurricane of my life. It's like these lyrics of one of my favorite Disturbed songs is running through my head. My life has worked it's ways down a downward spiral. My first ever match main eventing...And I blow it." I continue to take a negative turning point as I write this down in my journal.
Allison is in the bathroom. She is probably laying in the tub with warm water and bubbles surrounding her. She is probably relaxing right now. It would be a sin if I could relax though. I wish I could, but life has taken a nasty turn on me. I have evolved from "The arrogant and pumpas Object of Envy".
I am now a nothing. Turning to the worst in life and looking for answers. I sit on this bed with my legs tucked under one another. With a black pen in my right hand and a composition notebook in the other. God wants to preach to me like i am a sinner. I am not a constant sinner.
But the truth is, I have resorted to something I have not been pleased of seeing. I have made my last resort. I have now turned to drugs and alcohol to solve my problems. Reverend Shadow will surely fire me if he found out. I will lose my job. I will lose my house. I will lose Allison. She bathes innocently in the other room, oblivious to my recent antics and struggles.
I have turned to these things to help me re focus on what I need to do. I have failed everything I ever possibly wanted to do. Winning gold, and main eventing. I don't know where else to turn for a pick me up. I need some guidance. I need to change things around. I am not the object of envy anymore. There is nothing to envy me about. I have lunged myself into a period of self destruction. All the things that I thought I had that the people envied me for has now slowly decayed away.
It's like I'm down with the sickness. I step into a new phase in life. The WCF. I look for this new oppritunity to mold myself back into something that is near normal. My first match in a new company. A new way to excell in the world of professional wrestling. Two people stand in my way from acheiveing this now. Synn and Davey Ortega. I don't know much of these two though. I try to not think of the match at a personal standpoint by just saying that they are benneath me. But that would be a lie If I were to dare to say those words. They are above me. Theyare at a higher rank of life. I have fallen into a downward spiral. I am slowly falling into a black abyss.
I look to you as my only form of salvation from this cancer known as "self destruction". I look to you, my god, as my last hope. My last chance to keep everything that ever had meaning to me. In this match that we are going to have soon, I beg of you, have mercy on my soul. For it is a sin to write this. Make me worthy of your presence. Make me worthy of following your faith. Make me worthy of life as I know it today. But not as how I have lived it for the most part. Grant me and my love happiness and eternal glory. I beg of you. Save me from myself.
Take me under your wing and I will call you my Shepard. I seek the truth, I seek the faith. I seek liberation and freedom from these demons that have taken control over my life! Give me an answer to all my prayers. Give me an answer to all my hopes, my god, my shepard...My savior. Save me from this self destruction. Don't let my devotion be betrayed and don't let me taste fear on the tip of my tongue.
Davey Otega and Synn are the two people who stand in my way of salvation. I look to exterminate them from my path. I look to push them away for they are nothing more than a mere distraction from me acheiving the best in my life. They are just holding me down. I will not take it. I will acheive the best and put my life back on track. Now, I look to prove that I am better than those two and not better than me.
It is my final hour soon. I need to get cleansed and move on in glory and happiness. But the sickness has taken a toll on me. Lift me up and set me free of these chains that will drown me in the black abyss known as...."Self destruction."
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IT IS A SIN TO WRITE THIS. "Fading, falling, lost in forever. Will I find a way to keep it together. Am I strong enough to last through the weather? In the hurricane of my life. It's like these lyrics of one of my favorite Disturbed songs is running through my head. My life has worked it's ways down a downward spiral. My first ever match main eventing...And I blow it." I continue to take a negative turning point as I write this down in my journal.
Allison is in the bathroom. She is probably laying in the tub with warm water and bubbles surrounding her. She is probably relaxing right now. It would be a sin if I could relax though. I wish I could, but life has taken a nasty turn on me. I have evolved from "The arrogant and pumpas Object of Envy".
I am now a nothing. Turning to the worst in life and looking for answers. I sit on this bed with my legs tucked under one another. With a black pen in my right hand and a composition notebook in the other. God wants to preach to me like i am a sinner. I am not a constant sinner.
But the truth is, I have resorted to something I have not been pleased of seeing. I have made my last resort. I have now turned to drugs and alcohol to solve my problems. Reverend Shadow will surely fire me if he found out. I will lose my job. I will lose my house. I will lose Allison. She bathes innocently in the other room, oblivious to my recent antics and struggles.
I have turned to these things to help me re focus on what I need to do. I have failed everything I ever possibly wanted to do. Winning gold, and main eventing. I don't know where else to turn for a pick me up. I need some guidance. I need to change things around. I am not the object of envy anymore. There is nothing to envy me about. I have lunged myself into a period of self destruction. All the things that I thought I had that the people envied me for has now slowly decayed away.
It's like I'm down with the sickness. I step into a new phase in life. The WCF. I look for this new oppritunity to mold myself back into something that is near normal. My first match in a new company. A new way to excell in the world of professional wrestling. Two people stand in my way from acheiveing this now. Synn and Davey Ortega. I don't know much of these two though. I try to not think of the match at a personal standpoint by just saying that they are benneath me. But that would be a lie If I were to dare to say those words. They are above me. Theyare at a higher rank of life. I have fallen into a downward spiral. I am slowly falling into a black abyss.
I look to you as my only form of salvation from this cancer known as "self destruction". I look to you, my god, as my last hope. My last chance to keep everything that ever had meaning to me. In this match that we are going to have soon, I beg of you, have mercy on my soul. For it is a sin to write this. Make me worthy of your presence. Make me worthy of following your faith. Make me worthy of life as I know it today. But not as how I have lived it for the most part. Grant me and my love happiness and eternal glory. I beg of you. Save me from myself.
Take me under your wing and I will call you my Shepard. I seek the truth, I seek the faith. I seek liberation and freedom from these demons that have taken control over my life! Give me an answer to all my prayers. Give me an answer to all my hopes, my god, my shepard...My savior. Save me from this self destruction. Don't let my devotion be betrayed and don't let me taste fear on the tip of my tongue.
Davey Otega and Synn are the two people who stand in my way of salvation. I look to exterminate them from my path. I look to push them away for they are nothing more than a mere distraction from me acheiving the best in my life. They are just holding me down. I will not take it. I will acheive the best and put my life back on track. Now, I look to prove that I am better than those two and not better than me.
It is my final hour soon. I need to get cleansed and move on in glory and happiness. But the sickness has taken a toll on me. Lift me up and set me free of these chains that will drown me in the black abyss known as...."Self destruction."
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Fin.
