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Post by Kyle Kemp on Jul 24, 2015 10:48:29 GMT -5
I'm trying to adjust my character and writing style a bit. My first rp for Ultimate Showdown was supposed to start telling the story of the week and make everyone want to read my 2nd. I just want to know what you guys think!
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Post by Kaz on Jul 24, 2015 11:01:56 GMT -5
First thing: Always write to please yourself! That's a first and foremost when dealing with this game, I've come to find out. If you're not "happy" with what you've written, then chances are others won't be either.
From my perspective - and most others - I think Spencer and yourself did a wonderful job crafting a great midcard story to go along with the card. It's your Ultimate Showdown, and your promo reflected that.
One thing, and I guess it could be construed as nitpicky haha, but Kyle Kemp's tagline is "My name is Kyle Kemp, and I am better than you." I feel like that should be one your gimmicks focus. Kyle Kemp is "better" than everybody in every aspect. This means the reporter who came to interview Kyle Kemp should have gotten the boot, and Kyle does the interview himself. He sees a guy hit an outfield shot? Kyle hits a home run. Kyle sees a guy flippin' a burger? He does it better than him.
I feel like that could carry over throughout a lot of promos and make for a real entertaining/comedy aspect in your weekly material.
That's really all I have to say. Other than that, everything else in your promo is just tops man.
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Post by The Hardkore Master, Q-Ball on Jul 24, 2015 15:40:36 GMT -5
I agree with Kaz. That's exactly what you should do. Fly ball to the outfield barely reaches the warning track or even maybe it hits the wall. Kyle Kemp knocks a homerun to the second deck. Someone hits a 3 point shot. Kyle Kemp hits a half court shot nothing but net. Great advice Kaz
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Post by Jeff Purse on Jul 24, 2015 15:53:07 GMT -5
I disagree. Because Kemp is a Heel, he should try to do all that stuff, but fail. Then blame something else. Like, he hits a line drive that would end up as a double play, and he says like
"That pitcher was throwing shit. It wasn't fair."
Or something. Blame others for his shortcomings.
Of course, I didn't read the roleplay yet, but thats what I think.
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Post by Jay Omega on Jul 24, 2015 16:28:42 GMT -5
Combine the two ideas; it will help make him an insufferable prick. When he does something awesome, it was all his skill. When shit goes wrong, it was someone else's fault.
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Post by Alex Richards on Jul 25, 2015 10:57:16 GMT -5
I think Omega has it.
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Post by Kyle Kemp on Jul 25, 2015 11:15:25 GMT -5
Thanks for the advice guys!
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