Post by Biggs on Jan 16, 2007 22:23:31 GMT -5
"The Greatest" and Jake Hudson are walking down a busy Miami street. The weather is cold and the strong wind isn't helping. Hudson is wearing a huge winter coat which pretty much smothers the man. On the other hand, "The Greatest" is wearing a black leather jacket which reads, "The Greatest." You just knew it had to be self-promoting, right?
"The Greatest" : I'm scared, Jake. I don't think I've ever felt this way, man. I feel like I'm in Logan's shoes and I just looked at my reflection. I'm terrified.
Jake Hudson: Why? What's wrong?
"The Greatest" : It burns when I, you know, when I drain the main vein?
Jake Hudson: Damn. Did you bang a prostitute after Slam or something?
"The Greatest" : You can say that. It was Lerch's mother, so you know, it was free. I've never had this problem before though, you know? This isn't the first time I had Lerch's Mom in his bed. Last time, Logan's mother was there, too, but that's a story for another time.
Jake Hudson: I see. Maybe you should go to the doctor's office and get it checked out?
"The Greatest" : I already did.
Jake Hudson: What did he say?
"The Greatest" : He stuck a something up the hole, man. I can't even explain the type of pain I felt when he did that. I'm "The Greatest," I'm supposed to be invincible. I almost cried.
Jake Hudson: Do you have something?
"The Greatest" : Oh, no. He said I just have some sperm caught in my urinary tract or something.
Jake Hudson: Well, then why are you worried? It'll pass eventually.
"The Greatest" : I didn't say I was worried.
Jake Hudson: You did. Why else would we be talking about the burning sensation you have when you take a piss?
"The Greatest" : Just so we can have a conversation?
Jake Hudson: Wow, dude.
"The Greatest" : Yeah. So, do you have any money on you?
Jake Hudson: A couple of bucks. Why?
"The Greatest" : Because I'm thinking about starting a restaurant and I'm going to need some money to get the place going.
Jake Hudson: I don't have nearly enough money for something like that. You have plenty of it, though. You're in possession of WCF gold so I know you have a slight pay increase and you have your very own franchise of stores across the country.
"The Greatest" : Oh, yeah. Money isn't the issue. I actually have a money problem. So, I just stopped purchasing toilet paper and I wipe my ass with twenty dollar bills.
Jake Hudson: Um, then why do you want my money?
"The Greatest" : I said I had the money, I didn't say that I liked spending it.
Jake Hudson: You're an asshole.
"The Greatest" shrugs as the two continue walking down the street. The wind is slowly beginning to pick up a little bit.
"The Greatest" : Vice and I have a pretty big match this week, man.
Jake Hudson: Yeah, man. Aren't you guys facing three other teams?
"The Greatest" : Yeah, but I'm only worried about one of them. Skyler Striker and Thunder haven't proven to be any sort of competition since they won the titles from us a few weeks back. Now, they've just been defeated week after week by Vice and I. So, them, I'm not worried about. Seth Lerch and Reckless Jack is also another team that I'm not worried about. Those two can't even piss in the same bathroom without bitching, so I know they won't be able to get along. Besides, I have respect for Lerch and all, but the ring isn't his strong point. I've seen what he can do, and honestly it has to be worse than Thunder's in-ring ability and that's close to having absolutely no talent. But, I am worried about Logan and Jack of Blades. Those two are going to face each other at One for the WCF World Title, but they are still friends from when we were all in the Team of Treachery. Those two wouldn't mind adding another belt to their list of accomplishments.
Jake Hudson: Yeah, Logan and Jack of Blades are two of the best wrestlers this company has to offer.
"The Greatest" : You're right. They are one of the best, which can translate into good wrestlers. Good isn't great, so they aren't on my level. There are three different levels that you can rate people: ordinary, good, and great. You're ordinary, they are good, and I am great. Danny Vice isn't too bad, neither, but I wouldn't say he's on my level. Logan and Jack of Blades are not going to steal my title because I haven't even had the opportunity of cleaning them off since Skyler and Thunder had their filthy hands on them! I want to go into One with the tag titles and I want to walk out of One as a double champion! I am God's gift to wrestling. You hear people say that, they can claim to be his gift, but I can prove that I'm his gift. If Logan was fire, then I'm water. If Jack of Blades was water, then I am the sun. Whatever they claim to be, I'm one step above. I'd say Vice is about a half-step above them, but hey, only I can be great, right?
Jake Hudson: True.
"The Greatest" : I do respect Logan and Jack of Blades. Those two have done great things in this company and I am glad that one of them is going to be leading this company for a nice portion of 2007, but they need to stay away from me. I'm trying to lay low, but if they want to get physical, I can. I haven't been in the main-event picture because I don't want to be. Well, there's actually another reason that I'm not in the main-event picture. You know how I was talking about Lerch's mother, earlier?
Jake Hudson: Yeah.
"The Greatest" : Well, I told her I'd call her but I never did. So, you know, Lerch is being a big jerk about the entire situation so he's holding be back. That doesn't matter, though. I've proven that I can beat anyone and everyone that steps into my path. I've had a decorated career in this company and I am going to continue the road to glory as Disorder by Design has a successful title defense at Slam. You want to know how I know? I know because I'm great. That's why.
"The Greatest" and Jake Hudson continue walking down the street in the freezing cold. Suddenly, "The Greatest" stops and he motions for Hudson to follow him down an alley.
Jake Hudson: Where are we going?
"The Greatest" : I have to take a piss and I do not like using public bathrooms.
Jake Hudson: Um, okay. But didn't your mother ever tell you not to piss in the wind?
Jake starts laughing hysterically at his joke as JJ just stares at him for a few moments. Eventually, Jake finishes laughing and he wipes a tear away from his cheek.
Jake Hudson: What? I always wanted to say that.
"The Greatest" : Just shut up, dude.
"The Greatest" shakes his head as he turns around and unzips his pants. He begins to piss and he waits a moment before a huge smile appears on his face.
"The Greatest" : Jake! It's not burning! It doesn't burn when I piss anymore!
Jake Hudson: Cool. I've been meaning to ask you this for a long time. If a woman doesn't moan, yell, or scream during sex is she still enjoying it?
"The Greatest" : Usually means she can't feel the stick, you know? Do you have that problem or something?
Jake Hudson: No, not at all.
Jake kicks the dirt in frustration. Obviously, JJ just caused Jake a great deal of disappointment with his response. JJ is still pissing, so Jake begins to look around as he's trying to pass the time.
Jake Hudson: JJ!
"The Greatest" is a little slow and he must have forgotten that he is taking a piss as he turns around to see what Jake wants. He is still pissing and it goes all over Jake's leg. Jake backs away and he has a disgusted look on his face.
Jake Hudson: What the fuck is your problem, man? You just pissed all over me.
"The Greatest" : Sorry, man. You shouted my name and I got excited.
Jake Hudson: Whatever.
JJ finally finishes and he zips up his pants as Jake points at this abandoned building across the street.
Jake Hudson: You could put your restaurant there, man. It would be sweet. I don't think there is a decent restaurant around here anymore so you'd make a nice amount of profit if you served good food.
"The Greatest" : I better not serve Logan's mother's cooking, then. Let's go check the place out.
The two exit the alley and they make their way across the street to check out the abandoned building. JJ Biggs has already opened a chain of stores across the country, is a chain of restaurants to follow?[/b]
"The Greatest" : I'm scared, Jake. I don't think I've ever felt this way, man. I feel like I'm in Logan's shoes and I just looked at my reflection. I'm terrified.
Jake Hudson: Why? What's wrong?
"The Greatest" : It burns when I, you know, when I drain the main vein?
Jake Hudson: Damn. Did you bang a prostitute after Slam or something?
"The Greatest" : You can say that. It was Lerch's mother, so you know, it was free. I've never had this problem before though, you know? This isn't the first time I had Lerch's Mom in his bed. Last time, Logan's mother was there, too, but that's a story for another time.
Jake Hudson: I see. Maybe you should go to the doctor's office and get it checked out?
"The Greatest" : I already did.
Jake Hudson: What did he say?
"The Greatest" : He stuck a something up the hole, man. I can't even explain the type of pain I felt when he did that. I'm "The Greatest," I'm supposed to be invincible. I almost cried.
Jake Hudson: Do you have something?
"The Greatest" : Oh, no. He said I just have some sperm caught in my urinary tract or something.
Jake Hudson: Well, then why are you worried? It'll pass eventually.
"The Greatest" : I didn't say I was worried.
Jake Hudson: You did. Why else would we be talking about the burning sensation you have when you take a piss?
"The Greatest" : Just so we can have a conversation?
Jake Hudson: Wow, dude.
"The Greatest" : Yeah. So, do you have any money on you?
Jake Hudson: A couple of bucks. Why?
"The Greatest" : Because I'm thinking about starting a restaurant and I'm going to need some money to get the place going.
Jake Hudson: I don't have nearly enough money for something like that. You have plenty of it, though. You're in possession of WCF gold so I know you have a slight pay increase and you have your very own franchise of stores across the country.
"The Greatest" : Oh, yeah. Money isn't the issue. I actually have a money problem. So, I just stopped purchasing toilet paper and I wipe my ass with twenty dollar bills.
Jake Hudson: Um, then why do you want my money?
"The Greatest" : I said I had the money, I didn't say that I liked spending it.
Jake Hudson: You're an asshole.
"The Greatest" shrugs as the two continue walking down the street. The wind is slowly beginning to pick up a little bit.
"The Greatest" : Vice and I have a pretty big match this week, man.
Jake Hudson: Yeah, man. Aren't you guys facing three other teams?
"The Greatest" : Yeah, but I'm only worried about one of them. Skyler Striker and Thunder haven't proven to be any sort of competition since they won the titles from us a few weeks back. Now, they've just been defeated week after week by Vice and I. So, them, I'm not worried about. Seth Lerch and Reckless Jack is also another team that I'm not worried about. Those two can't even piss in the same bathroom without bitching, so I know they won't be able to get along. Besides, I have respect for Lerch and all, but the ring isn't his strong point. I've seen what he can do, and honestly it has to be worse than Thunder's in-ring ability and that's close to having absolutely no talent. But, I am worried about Logan and Jack of Blades. Those two are going to face each other at One for the WCF World Title, but they are still friends from when we were all in the Team of Treachery. Those two wouldn't mind adding another belt to their list of accomplishments.
Jake Hudson: Yeah, Logan and Jack of Blades are two of the best wrestlers this company has to offer.
"The Greatest" : You're right. They are one of the best, which can translate into good wrestlers. Good isn't great, so they aren't on my level. There are three different levels that you can rate people: ordinary, good, and great. You're ordinary, they are good, and I am great. Danny Vice isn't too bad, neither, but I wouldn't say he's on my level. Logan and Jack of Blades are not going to steal my title because I haven't even had the opportunity of cleaning them off since Skyler and Thunder had their filthy hands on them! I want to go into One with the tag titles and I want to walk out of One as a double champion! I am God's gift to wrestling. You hear people say that, they can claim to be his gift, but I can prove that I'm his gift. If Logan was fire, then I'm water. If Jack of Blades was water, then I am the sun. Whatever they claim to be, I'm one step above. I'd say Vice is about a half-step above them, but hey, only I can be great, right?
Jake Hudson: True.
"The Greatest" : I do respect Logan and Jack of Blades. Those two have done great things in this company and I am glad that one of them is going to be leading this company for a nice portion of 2007, but they need to stay away from me. I'm trying to lay low, but if they want to get physical, I can. I haven't been in the main-event picture because I don't want to be. Well, there's actually another reason that I'm not in the main-event picture. You know how I was talking about Lerch's mother, earlier?
Jake Hudson: Yeah.
"The Greatest" : Well, I told her I'd call her but I never did. So, you know, Lerch is being a big jerk about the entire situation so he's holding be back. That doesn't matter, though. I've proven that I can beat anyone and everyone that steps into my path. I've had a decorated career in this company and I am going to continue the road to glory as Disorder by Design has a successful title defense at Slam. You want to know how I know? I know because I'm great. That's why.
"The Greatest" and Jake Hudson continue walking down the street in the freezing cold. Suddenly, "The Greatest" stops and he motions for Hudson to follow him down an alley.
Jake Hudson: Where are we going?
"The Greatest" : I have to take a piss and I do not like using public bathrooms.
Jake Hudson: Um, okay. But didn't your mother ever tell you not to piss in the wind?
Jake starts laughing hysterically at his joke as JJ just stares at him for a few moments. Eventually, Jake finishes laughing and he wipes a tear away from his cheek.
Jake Hudson: What? I always wanted to say that.
"The Greatest" : Just shut up, dude.
"The Greatest" shakes his head as he turns around and unzips his pants. He begins to piss and he waits a moment before a huge smile appears on his face.
"The Greatest" : Jake! It's not burning! It doesn't burn when I piss anymore!
Jake Hudson: Cool. I've been meaning to ask you this for a long time. If a woman doesn't moan, yell, or scream during sex is she still enjoying it?
"The Greatest" : Usually means she can't feel the stick, you know? Do you have that problem or something?
Jake Hudson: No, not at all.
Jake kicks the dirt in frustration. Obviously, JJ just caused Jake a great deal of disappointment with his response. JJ is still pissing, so Jake begins to look around as he's trying to pass the time.
Jake Hudson: JJ!
"The Greatest" is a little slow and he must have forgotten that he is taking a piss as he turns around to see what Jake wants. He is still pissing and it goes all over Jake's leg. Jake backs away and he has a disgusted look on his face.
Jake Hudson: What the fuck is your problem, man? You just pissed all over me.
"The Greatest" : Sorry, man. You shouted my name and I got excited.
Jake Hudson: Whatever.
JJ finally finishes and he zips up his pants as Jake points at this abandoned building across the street.
Jake Hudson: You could put your restaurant there, man. It would be sweet. I don't think there is a decent restaurant around here anymore so you'd make a nice amount of profit if you served good food.
"The Greatest" : I better not serve Logan's mother's cooking, then. Let's go check the place out.
The two exit the alley and they make their way across the street to check out the abandoned building. JJ Biggs has already opened a chain of stores across the country, is a chain of restaurants to follow?[/b]
