Post by jackhammer on Oct 2, 2006 18:45:41 GMT -5
{Scene opens and JackHammer is driving with Saber around the streets of New York City. Saber looks pissed and JackHammer doesn’t look incredibly happy either. They are cruising along. Saber is wearing a Lethal Intent stretch t-shirt and a wool hat with a pair of jeans. JackHammer a red Lethal Intent tank top and a bandana with black jeans.}
Saber: I lost to that damn jobber…
JackHammer: Yeah, you did…
Saber: What the hell is wrong with me?
JackHammer: You take sh*t for granted man, you thought he was going to be a breeze and were up all night the day before eating food and banging ho’s. When I woke up around four, I still heard the moans of that bi*ch…
Saber: Ha, yeah, oh well. I will get my revenge.
JackHammer: We’ll take care of those two douchebags eventually. I will show them what drinking and beating the . out of people is all about. I am the master of drinking and beating the . out of people, I mean, the fu*king king of it…
Saber: So, why the hell did we take your non-fuel efficient truck to New York City nutsack…
JackHammer: Well, because it is the only vehicle I have…
{Saber slaps his forehead}
Saber: No, I have a Volvo, why didn’t we take that…
JackHammer: Because, my truck is bigger, and since I have a bigger . I get to make all of the choices in this stable…
Saber: Really though, why are we here…
JackHammer: To find New Dynasty…
{Saber looks confused}
Saber: I don’t think they live in New York City…
JackHammer: Isn’t that where all the ho’s are at? I just figured I would be able to find them on a corner around here somewhere…
{Saber laughs}
Saber: You came all the way up here to cut a promo on how New Dynasty are whores on the streets…
JackHammer: Yeah, brilliant eh?
Saber: Yeah, sure.
{Saber rolls his eyes as JackHammer pulls into a part of the neighborhood that you wouldn’t normally go to, Random Jap crawls out from under the seat, you don’t understand how he got there…}
Jap: New Dynasty!! WWHHHEERRRAAASSS DA HOOOOSS ATTTTTTTAAAAA!!!
{JackHammer puts his hand over the mouth of Random Jap}
JackHammer: Not yet dude, wait until I give you the signal…
Saber: You gave random jap a signal…
JackHammer: Yeah, I grab my nuts and rub them
{the camera pans down and you see JackHammer doing just that}
Saber: You do that all the time, he was probably obeying the signal…
{JackHammer looks down and shakes his head}
JackHammer: Damn, oh well…
{The two step out of the truck which JackHammer locks with the remote on his keychain. The three men walk into a quite desolate alleyway. Fire is in the barrels, bums are standing around, JackHammer looks around and keeps walking, they continue for awhile and they come up to a group of women doing the street walking thing, JackHammer then starts, very obviously grabbing his genitals and adjusting them to and fro… Random Jap seeing this yells…}
Jap: WHEERRREESS THE BIGGESSTT HHOOOOAAA?? New Dynasty, WHEERREE AREEE YOOOUUAAAAA!!!!
{JackHammer laughs and smiles}
JackHammer: There, I am all set, we can go now
Saber: You are kidding right?
JackHammer: No, that’s it, that promo says it all. New Dynasty thinks there hot sh*t, and think that by jumping Chino last ppv that I'm' gonna run in fear. Well, they my friend is just like these street walkers, useless, disgusting and possessing some serious STD’s...and did the wrong fu*king choice, they just woke up a sleeping monster that's gonna kill a so called New Dynasty.
Saber: That’s a good promo….
{As these two contemplate we see a group of several Puerto Rican gentlemen coming up from behind random jap. You see one of them laughing, probably at the fact that random jap is wearing a pair of fluorescent yellow chaps, and some cowboy boots, that’s it.}
Saber:New Dynasty really made a dumb mistake the last ppv.
JackHammer: Hell yea them dumb mother fu*kers did, them boys don't have a clue how bad he pissed me off and Chino to. They'll get what's comming to him at the next Slam.
Saber: Damn straight…
{We see random jap start running in place, probably ADD, then one of the Puerto Rican fellows belts him in the back of the head with a blackjack, and he falls forward, they pick him up and carry him up the alley…}
JackHammer: Let’s go back home…
Saber: That’s all you wanted to do?
JackHammer: I told you, yes…
{Saber turns around}
Saber: Where’s el hombre de randomness?
JackHammer: No idea, probably at the truck
Saber: Let’s go back to the truck
{They walk around the corner and JackHammer screams and falls to his knees sobbing}
Saber: Holy Sh*t….
{The camera pans over to see that his truck is jacked up and on stands, no tires are found}
JackHammer: Those tires were so much money, ARRRGHHH!!! We must go find them…
Saber: What about Random Jap?
JackHammer: What about him, we have more pressing issues to attend to, like where the fu*k my tires and rims are…
{JackHammer runs up the alley and Saber follows him, what zany mischief will our two heroes get into in this, their newest adventure, only time will tell.}
Saber: I lost to that damn jobber…
JackHammer: Yeah, you did…
Saber: What the hell is wrong with me?
JackHammer: You take sh*t for granted man, you thought he was going to be a breeze and were up all night the day before eating food and banging ho’s. When I woke up around four, I still heard the moans of that bi*ch…
Saber: Ha, yeah, oh well. I will get my revenge.
JackHammer: We’ll take care of those two douchebags eventually. I will show them what drinking and beating the . out of people is all about. I am the master of drinking and beating the . out of people, I mean, the fu*king king of it…
Saber: So, why the hell did we take your non-fuel efficient truck to New York City nutsack…
JackHammer: Well, because it is the only vehicle I have…
{Saber slaps his forehead}
Saber: No, I have a Volvo, why didn’t we take that…
JackHammer: Because, my truck is bigger, and since I have a bigger . I get to make all of the choices in this stable…
Saber: Really though, why are we here…
JackHammer: To find New Dynasty…
{Saber looks confused}
Saber: I don’t think they live in New York City…
JackHammer: Isn’t that where all the ho’s are at? I just figured I would be able to find them on a corner around here somewhere…
{Saber laughs}
Saber: You came all the way up here to cut a promo on how New Dynasty are whores on the streets…
JackHammer: Yeah, brilliant eh?
Saber: Yeah, sure.
{Saber rolls his eyes as JackHammer pulls into a part of the neighborhood that you wouldn’t normally go to, Random Jap crawls out from under the seat, you don’t understand how he got there…}
Jap: New Dynasty!! WWHHHEERRRAAASSS DA HOOOOSS ATTTTTTTAAAAA!!!
{JackHammer puts his hand over the mouth of Random Jap}
JackHammer: Not yet dude, wait until I give you the signal…
Saber: You gave random jap a signal…
JackHammer: Yeah, I grab my nuts and rub them
{the camera pans down and you see JackHammer doing just that}
Saber: You do that all the time, he was probably obeying the signal…
{JackHammer looks down and shakes his head}
JackHammer: Damn, oh well…
{The two step out of the truck which JackHammer locks with the remote on his keychain. The three men walk into a quite desolate alleyway. Fire is in the barrels, bums are standing around, JackHammer looks around and keeps walking, they continue for awhile and they come up to a group of women doing the street walking thing, JackHammer then starts, very obviously grabbing his genitals and adjusting them to and fro… Random Jap seeing this yells…}
Jap: WHEERRREESS THE BIGGESSTT HHOOOOAAA?? New Dynasty, WHEERREE AREEE YOOOUUAAAAA!!!!
{JackHammer laughs and smiles}
JackHammer: There, I am all set, we can go now
Saber: You are kidding right?
JackHammer: No, that’s it, that promo says it all. New Dynasty thinks there hot sh*t, and think that by jumping Chino last ppv that I'm' gonna run in fear. Well, they my friend is just like these street walkers, useless, disgusting and possessing some serious STD’s...and did the wrong fu*king choice, they just woke up a sleeping monster that's gonna kill a so called New Dynasty.
Saber: That’s a good promo….
{As these two contemplate we see a group of several Puerto Rican gentlemen coming up from behind random jap. You see one of them laughing, probably at the fact that random jap is wearing a pair of fluorescent yellow chaps, and some cowboy boots, that’s it.}
Saber:New Dynasty really made a dumb mistake the last ppv.
JackHammer: Hell yea them dumb mother fu*kers did, them boys don't have a clue how bad he pissed me off and Chino to. They'll get what's comming to him at the next Slam.
Saber: Damn straight…
{We see random jap start running in place, probably ADD, then one of the Puerto Rican fellows belts him in the back of the head with a blackjack, and he falls forward, they pick him up and carry him up the alley…}
JackHammer: Let’s go back home…
Saber: That’s all you wanted to do?
JackHammer: I told you, yes…
{Saber turns around}
Saber: Where’s el hombre de randomness?
JackHammer: No idea, probably at the truck
Saber: Let’s go back to the truck
{They walk around the corner and JackHammer screams and falls to his knees sobbing}
Saber: Holy Sh*t….
{The camera pans over to see that his truck is jacked up and on stands, no tires are found}
JackHammer: Those tires were so much money, ARRRGHHH!!! We must go find them…
Saber: What about Random Jap?
JackHammer: What about him, we have more pressing issues to attend to, like where the fu*k my tires and rims are…
{JackHammer runs up the alley and Saber follows him, what zany mischief will our two heroes get into in this, their newest adventure, only time will tell.}
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