I'll try my hand at this. I'm not so good at rating the RP. I'll give suggestions.
Questions with comments:
Every week we find Q-Ball at his gym. He's bouncing the daily business of the gym and WCF. A RL situation like that for a wrestler would be tough. Not many would get very far in both aspects. You have to make Q-Ball real. Bring tough decisions up in his mind. This week Slam is a perfect time for that decision to start crowding into his mind.
With Q-Ball always at the gym, it's like he has no time for fun and games. You know the saying 'all work and no play'. I personally want to see Q-Ball having some fun. Hence the reason I got Q-Ball out of his office in my RP. So what does Grime enjoy outside of the gym.
Also...Jenna and Q-Ball are married. Look at all these reality shows where personal life drama is across the TV schedule. I don't watch that junk, but where's the relationship at with Jenna and Q-Ball? Are they sleeping in two separate beds like Lucy and Ricky Ricardo? Got kids? IF so what are the kids doing, now?
Q-Ball returns to the ring. How old is he? Is he having a mid-life crisis?
Where is his story? Knowing you RL you read a lot. You may not base your character off any of the characters in the books you read, but you base him off something. How would that person react to a lot of the things going on in WCF? You may be new, but an older wrestler would know how certain things affect others.
Suggestions with comments:
I would change things up a bit in your RPs. Like I mentioned you have Q-Ball always at the gym. Make his life a bit more full.
Commercial: The commercial was a start to showing part of Q-Ball's life. If you haven't noticed, the bigger actors and actresses of the past tend to have been doing quite a few commercials. Why? Have you seen those various people in any big movies lately? There are new hotter actors and actresses that have taken the spotlight and Hollywood has moved on. Same thing in wrestling. Newer and hotter wrestlers taking the torch so to speak. Why did Q-Ball decide to return to the ring? Was it to prove that he still has it? Was it just for the love of it? Why did Q-Ball choose WCF? You have to add depth into his reasoning. Not your personal reasoning for joining up, but Q-Ball's reason.
Hotter/Newer wrestlers: WCF is full of younger stars. New guys are coming in like crazy. You have to make Q-Ball set his eyes on being that unique non-rookie type of wrestler, wiser, less of a chaotic guy. He's Grime's mentor. So you have to make Q-Ball that mentor. Lead by example. Grime may be TV champion. Singles he is undefeated still. But he still has a lot to learn when it comes to the industry. I have a lot to work on when it comes to RPing. IC Grime has a lot to learn about biting off more than he can chew. Q-Ball needs to be that guy with a plan. He's been around.
Face/Neutral/Heel: You have been using Q-Ball as a baby face in other feds. Now, being part of anti-WCF aligned with Grime who is working toward being super heel, Q-Ball has to adjust. Does he see it as being the right thing or a thing of necessity right now to be part of that anti-WCF part. The transition will be interesting. You just need to figure out how Q-Ball goes from being baby face the way you've used him to becoming a heel. Being in a new fed is something you can take advantage of because no one has always seen Q-Ball as baby face. But still, the change in alignment can't just be all of the sudden type deal. Has to make some sense.
Overall:
Triple the Pain RP was decent.
Dialogue: You need to work on your dialogue a bit more. Every RP seems rehearsed in some form. It's print. But you have to make it come off the page.
Scenes: After that commercial with Q-Ball all the sudden talking and what was said at that point didn't make much sense. At that point it seemed like there was no actual footage to be seen off the set. My opinion is that this could have been a point where we would have entered Q-Ball's mind. Rather than thinking out loud, bring us in.
I would have used the comments on Zach Davis in an interview. Hank Brown would have been good to bring to the gym. Make Hank feel uncomfortable and maybe even have him try to stick up for Zach Davis a bit. Q-Ball's reaction? What do you think Q-Ball would do on the spot?
Sometimes and we're all guilty at some point or another when it comes to making things flow. It seemed a bit jerky, but it wasn't intended to be jerky from the way I saw it. If you mean to make it look a bit jerky, you have to show some emotion with it. You have to make Q-Ball human.
Characters: You have a ton at the gym. Problem with that is that Q-Ball gets lost in all the characters sometimes. You don't want to make Q-Ball's brother Eric more interesting than he is. Jenna has to end up being a huge part of his life. IF Q-Ball and Jenna have children, use their age to bring Q-Ball out of the gym once and a while realistically. Are they spoiled brats? Are they getting in trouble? Are they perfect boring annoying little angels? Try something new when it comes to Q-Ball's surroundings.
Comedy: Where is it? Right now I see Q-Ball like my uncle Bill. Make Q-Ball laugh for real. I mean make him do something human and stupid. Maybe even make him snap into mid-life crisis. Dude you gave me a hard time all the time! That's discrimination! Give others a hard time in your RP too.
Entertainment: Use the week and just work on it in bits and pieces. What helps is I write my RPs out on paper or type them up before the card is even posted. I bring the match relevance into it. I use the pre-card posting time part to bring Grime to life. I use the rest of the time to make it about the match as well. Sometimes I don't have much else to go with when it comes to the match. Sometimes I can't stop.
Hopefully this has helped you and maybe others as well when it comes to their own characters. Don't change Q-Ball's personality. But show his personality man.