Post by Deleted on Mar 9, 2014 11:28:03 GMT -5
Tag Team Journalism
When Bryan Worthy went back to actively competing in the Wrestling Championship Federation, he had moved to Oley, Pennsylvania to be closer to the company’s developmental system. The idea being that such proximity would make it easier for him to access its state of the art training facilities, and that the relative isolation of the small town would help him focus on getting back into ring shape. So far, the strategy had worked, at least in regards to Worthy’s accomplishments in-between the ropes. He was 2-0 since his return to the roster, despite employing an offense that was vastly different from his prior tenure, when he was packing twenty extra pounds of muscle. Of course, given the relative lack of success Buzz had experienced in those earlier days, perhaps the changes in physique and tactics were the reasons for his change in fortunes.
What Bryan had not changed was his daily routine. He very much a creature of habit, some might go so far as call him a grind. His morning schedule seldom varied. His alarm was set for 5am. He made coffee, saw to his ablutions, and spent his first hour awake getting caught up on any non-wrestling related news and correspondence. Then, at 6, he’d dress for the weather, leave his studio apartment, and make the jog to the Oley Turnpike Diner for breakfast. This morning he had on his blindingly gold hooded thermal training suit, and a black waterproof backpack that carried his ring gear and various electronic media devices. Once at the restaurant he would ask for his usual breakfast: two Farmer’s Specials, juice, milk, and coffee. Taking out his phone and tablet, Buzz would then start his workday.
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Press Express?
The Fourth Estate?
Team Media?
The Newshounds?
The World’s Most Truthful Tag Team?
This was the list Bryan had typed up on his iPad while scrolling through the numerous wrestling related newsgroups on his phone. It was part of a larger document; an expansive near schizophrenic hodgepodge of brainstorming and spit-balling he would build on before every one of his matches. Its title was simply “Ideas”.
“What are you working on, Mister Worthy?” his server, a gangly teen with a devilock haircut inquired as he set down the plate’s that held Buzz’s victuals.
“Nothing worth discussing at this point, Dana,” Bryan smiled at the waitstaff, “Maybe once I get some confirmation, I can let you know.”
“Sure, I got you. Hey, great match on Sunday. That Artyom guy was a beast, but you were still able to drop him. Very cool.”
“Thanks,” Bryan buttered his marble rye, “It was a tough fight. Artyom is probably the biggest, strongest man I’ve ever faced in the ring, and having a cunning manager at ringside like Svetlana certainly added to my handicap. But I was able to beat him by adapting to his style, which, when you think about it, it’s quite symbolic of how the country he represents was ultimately brought down.
Dana nodded absently, but the truth was he really wasn’t interested in thinking about it. He didn’t watch wrestling for story or theme: he just liked watching people fight. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, “Uh huh. I saw online this week you’ve got a tag match.”
After a sip of his coffee Buzz replied, “Yes, I’m partnering with Scoops Callahan against Endorphin and James Herringbone. It should be a great match. Before coming to WCF I was something of a tag team specialist, so I’m returning to my roots in a way. Also, getting to work with the legendary Scoops Callahan will be a real treat.”
“If you say so, Mister Worthy,” the young man shrugged, “I know Callahan is like, this big name reporter and everything. But he’s, uh, kind of old, isn’t he? And small? And inexperienced?”
“All salient points, Dana,” Bryan admitted as he tore off a segment of bacon and chewed on it, “But they are ones easily addressed. Check out WCF’s website later today, and you’ll see my thoughts on Scoop’s supposed in ring shortcomings, among other issues.”
“Will do,” the waiter grinned before drifting off to help other customers. This allowed Buzz to focus on his meal in earnest, though not before he added one more note to his “Ideas” file:
Newsus?
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Promo time. Buzz is standing in front of a cinderblock wall with WCF’s logo spray-painted on it. He’s in his ring gear, which consists of gold wrestling trunks and black knee and elbow pads. A white boxing robe with gold trim hangs loose over his trim frame. He speaks:
“This Sunday, March 9th, the Wrestling Championship Federation returns to the Centennial State. Slam will be broadcast live from Denver’s Pepsi Center, and what a show it’s going to be. Both the Television and United States titles will be defended, and Number One contenders for the Hardcore and TV Titles will be determined. As for me, I’ll be competing in my first tag match since coming back to the company. My teammate is a man known by many in the WCF Universe, though probably not as a wrestler. Ace reporter Scoops Callahan, fresh off his victory in the Internet Title Tournament, will be my partner as we square off against the masked malefactor Endorphin and the equally unstable newcomer, James Herringbone. It’s an interesting pairing we find ourselves against. Endorphin and Herringbone complement each other well. The former is a self-described ‘hardcore risk taker’ who seeks to get under his opponents’ skin with his prurient in-ring antics. Herringbone, meanwhile, is a brawler with a strong technical background and a wide sadistic streak. He openly brags about wanting to destroy his competition both physically and mentally. This union might seem hastily thrown together, but I can see the booking committee’s reasoning behind it. Endorphin and Herringbone is an ad hoc combination, alright, but it’s one with the skill and disposition to create chaos in WCF’s tag team division: a duo that wants to humiliate and subjugate those who stand opposite it in the ring.”
Buzz pauses, and gives the viewer a small smile.
“To that, I say bring it on. Endorphin, sling your insults at us. James Herringbone, try your mind games. Scoops and I are ready for them. Do you honestly think you can wear us down with jibes and psychological warfare? We’re journalists! And as members of the fourth estate, taking a brow beating is part of the job. We’ve been insulted and lied to by experts. There’s no dig you can come up with, no intimidation that you can bring to bear, that will hurt us in the slightest. Reporters need to have three things in order to succeed: a sense of justice, an inquisitive mind, and, most applicably, a thick skin. You’re not going to be able to psyche us out, gentlemen. We’re the press: we’re used to people trying to manipulate us.”
Worthy lets that point linger for a moment before continuing.
“As for your prospects at beating us in the ring, well, it might seem like the odds are more in your favor. You’re both dangerous men who take pride in hurting those you compete against. Endorphin has his unpredictability, James Herringbone, his opportunism. Meanwhile, aligned against you are a couple ‘knights of the keyboard’. Scoops and I have been accused of being dilettantes, and worse, novelty acts that have no place competing in such a prestigious wrestling organization as WCF. The critics are especially hard on Scoops, given his age and lack of experience. But let me tell you; let me tell everyone, something about Scoops Callahan. He’s not old, he’s seasoned. Scoops is a tough old bird who has been part of this business for… well, I don’t know how long exactly, but it’s been a while. The man has been interviewing wrestlers since before any of us were born, and has taken cheap shot after cheap shot from many a heat-seeking ‘heel’. Scoops Callahan’s body is ninety percent gristle, eight percent scotch whiskey, and two percent printer’s ink. He’ll be able to take whatever you dish out. And as for his lack of experience in the ring, it’s obvious Scoops is a quick study. I saw him defeat a much younger, much more experienced wrestler in Jayden Thunder on WCF Wednesday Night. His moves might have been ‘old school’, but he executed them like a valedictorian. Scoops Callahan should not be viewed as a soft target or a weak link in this match Sunday.”
Buzz’s handsome features harden.
“And neither should I. I’m 2-0 since coming back to WCF. I’ve been in the ring with Endorphin once already, and while I didn’t pin you, I was the one with my hand raised at the end of the match. The following week, I faced off against a seven foot, three hundred pound powerhouse and left him staring up at the lights. Neither match was easy. I’m not the strongest wrestler, or the fastest, or the most technically sound. And unlike the two of you, I’m not motivated to fight because I want to embarrass or ‘conquer’ my enemies. I wrestle to give the fans a show. Those people who want to see a couple of sadists like yourselves taken down a peg. This Sunday, Endorphin and James Herringbone, you’re going to help me and Scoops tell a story in the ring. And it’s going to be one with a happy ending, though neither of you are going to see it that way. ”
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Later, Dana would watch Buzz’s promo as it was posted on WCF.com. He was okay with it; it advertised the upcoming match well enough; though nothing especially newsworthy was said; an irony, considered the talent involved. The speech was your standard “Don’t underestimate the Good Guys, Bad Guys!” boilerplate babyfaces had been using in wrestling for decades. Dana supposed Worthy claiming his and his tag partner’s journalistic credentials would be a strength rather than a weakness going into the fight was a clever thematic touch, but as stated previously the young man didn’t watch wrestling looking for subtext. He just liked watching people fight; especially when they were half naked, well-muscled, and glistening with a blend of sweat and oil.
Dana popped open the disc drive on his laptop and slid in his DVD of “Hardbody in Motion: The Best Matches of Jack ‘Jacked’ Jameson”. While waiting for the compilation to cue up he tossed the covers off his prone frame and spit on his open palm.
That’s where we’ll conclude our viewing of Dwight’s own show, as some things are better done in private. Rest assured though; like Bryan Worthy’s and Scoop Callahan’s match this Sunday; it will have a happy ending.
