Post by Caliban on Feb 27, 2014 1:36:16 GMT -5
Battle 1: Convincing the one you love
We open on Caliban and Sinnesy having breakfast in what looks like London England, they are there doing some press work and a particular UK panel show has picked up on the exchange between Matthew Robinson and himself over Caliban's actions against his wife a couple of weeks back
Sinney looks over the top over her shitty tabloid newspaper they are reading for jokes and considers him for a second
Sinney: You really wanna do this, you really wanna go on TV with 4 militantly scary females, on a show we both know your mother watches and try and defend yourself?
Jordan Caliban: Hell yes I do Matthew Robinson is exactly the kind of person I despise for his view on the world and the reasons he has for this match are just blindingly wrong and for too me I was offended by it. I am a dick, its a well known thing, some people consider me the most minor hated person in WCF right now but it isn't because of how I conduct myself in the ring. The match with Stacy was a representation of the respect I had for her in needing to try and throw her off her game just to get a shot in.
Sinney: He is going to try and tear you apart you know that right?
Jordan Caliban: The word you used there, I like that word, try, bigger people than Matthew Robinson have tried to take me out recently, Steve Orbit our current champion had a go and it took every boy he had to put me down in the end. Matthew is someone who I have seen since the first days in this company try his best and say all the right things but he can't get the job done. I showed that when I took out his trash for him.
Sinnesy: Lionheart was a long time ago Jordan, maybe he has grown some in the past few months
Jordan Caliban: Ill bet he has but nowhere near as much as I have I promise you that
Battle 2: Convincing the world
We open on a TV somewhere in a British Living room, the TV is on and a show is starting
We switch to the TV studio where Jordan Caliban is sitting looking confident in between 4 women of various ages
Head Crazy Bitch: Hi and welcome to the February 27th 2014 edition of loose women, we start today with a professional wrestler who was born in Northern Ireland but works for a company called World Championship Federation of Wrestling is that right?
Caliban (laughing): Close enough yeah
Blonde Crazy Bitch: Jordan I just want to cut in here because I was the one who brought this one up to our producers as the story is something myself and my 20 years younger than me husband is a big WCF fan
The crowd at this point breaks into a horrible cat call type chant about the Blonde chicks new husband, a shot of Caliban shows a look of “why am I here on his face” and then he gets a sharp reminder
Blonde Crazy Bitch: Now the story you are involved in right now and the one that brought you to us is that you are trying to justify inappropriately touching your opponent this coming Sunday's wife in a match a fortnight ago. Now to me I had to hear this from myself
Slightly younger perpetually single crazy bitch: Now hold on I have never met a wrestler before, tell us more about how you got into that particular proffesion
Jordan Caliban: The same way any footballer or rugby player does, I love it, I have done since I was a small child, you see this?
Caliban pulls down his t-shirt to reveal a massively swollen shoulder
Jordan Caliban: That's love, this is what I do and its all I want to do
Old Crazy bitch: Oh my god! What happened?
Jordan Caliban: My opponents wife happened to tell you the truth, you see this is my point, what we do we need advantages, we need our opponents to make mistakes, Stacy Robinson was a dangerous person who was standing in a ring ready and willing to hurt me and she did, pretty much the entire 20 minutes we where out there.
Blonde Crazy Bitch: But thats still no excuse for what you did surely
Jordan Caliban: I'll tell you what why don't you go and ask my wife of 4 years if I did anything wrong, go ask my mum or the other 12 women who raised me with very little male influence if they think I was genuinely being a pervert or a pig. They will tell you I was doing what I do for a living and thats be an **BEEP** hole and win wrestling matches
Old Crazy Bitch: Well Girlfriend's husband certainly doesn't see it that way
Jordan Caliban: Look there are a lot of weak people in my business, people with nothing to say for themselves in performance and in personality, they cling on to things they watched on TV, Matt's wife can handle herself probably better than he can. But Matt's main problem is that he is really the sexist one of the two of us. He would rather see us treat his wife like an angel while she makes tea in the kitchen instead of going out to the ring and spitting in the face
The crowd reacts with disgusted noises at this part
Jordan Caliban: See there you go, she spat in my face when I did what I did, now are you telling me that's not a woman who can handle someone trying to get in her head in the most natural way possible?
It's competition and Stacy is a competitor my opponent and the rest of my critics including you madam need to open your eyes and see that
The crowd reacts with OOOOOOO
Blonde Crazy Bitch: YOU HUMILIATED THE WOMAN ON NATIONAL TV TO MILLIONS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD! How can you justify that by saying it was the right thing to do?
Jordan Caliban: I didn't humiliate her at all, I gave her an opportunity to show the world that she is much much stronger than they all think she is and her husband thinks she should be. Matt is going into this fight because Stacy had an incredible match against me and he needs to prove he is just as good if not better than her. And that state of mind will do one thing for him and that's get him beat...
Head Crazy Bitch: WOW WOW WOW OK folks, Jordan I'm sorry but we have run out of time for this segment
Jordan Caliban: Of course, can I quickly say hi?
Head Crazy Bitch: Of course
Jordan Caliban: Hi mum and Aunt Ray I know you are both watching, I hope this has maybe made more sense of my actions to the world at large, we only do what we do to win, Sequitus lives forever. Thank you for having me on guys have a great day
The TV gets shut off as a stout little man ambles into the living room and shuts it off mumbling about crazy bitches and their stupid views wasting his electricity
Battle 3: Convincing the opponent
We open on Caliban in front of a dead rabbits graphic, he has an extremely pissed off look on his face and is vibrating on the spot
Jordan Caliban: DOES MATHEW ROBINSON HAVE ANY IDEA WHO IN THE FUCK HE IS DEALING WITH? Does he really think someone as advanced as me really has views on such trivial things as feminism, people are strong, it's their losses not their weaknesses that push them down. See Matt in my mind sex is not a divide, color is not a divide, class is not a divide, species... is... NOT... a divide. There is only one thing that separates human beings when the world is cut down to the bones, there are winners and there are losers and the truly strong are the ones who truly know what is worth fighting for and what it takes to win
Caliban laughs an lights a spliff produced from underneath his cap
Jordan Caliban: Hey Matthew
He points at the stitching above the snap at the back of the cap, it reads THINK FAST, he then turns it round to an 8 bit image of Sonic and Tails
Jordan Caliban: You need to realize that this match is not about Stacy, you need to stop making everything you do about her, WAKE UP AND REALIZE THAT YOU ARE GOING TO GET THE SHIT KICKED OUT OF YOU ON SUNDAY NIGHT. Your wife dislocated my arm, have I used that against you? No, she got her revenge and that chapter is over, this is why you are going to lose, its the reason you never put it down when it counts Matt. Life is about winning, its not about what kind of genetils you have, I realise this, I realise the value of wins and losses only and I will take that knowledge and state of mind and use it to annihilate you and your boring old Male Chauvinistic pig point of view. Matthew it saddens me that you are around, that incredible woman you try so hard to keep in your shadow would make a great inclusion to Sequitus, you can see it Matthew and the uncertainty breeds your anger and hatred of anyone who looks at her. Because they see her for what you are not and try not to see when you look into her eyes. On an evolutionary step she is higher than you, she is as much a part of Sequitus as the rest of us are she just doesnt want to participate in what it will take to put us there and leave the old crumbling male dominated, BORING! World behind
Final Battle: Convince your comrades, win the war
The final stop on Calibans Publicity tour is a Skype chat with the rest of Sequitus, they have all asked their questions and are now giving him the floor to speak before they all go back to their day
Jordan Caliban: I look at you all and I ask you this, do you really believe on a night that we literally have the world at our finger tips that I am going to let some pathetic soap opera drama shit get in the way of a totally dominant performance this week. See this my week where I need to step up, I can be the mouth behind Sequitus all I want and you guys don't seem to have a problem with that. This week isn't about Stacy and Matt's epic romcom love story, it's about Jordan Caliban finally being dominant in the WCF ring like I used to be. Guys the reason I have not really been talking much about our record right now is because I blame myself, we got 2 guys on the road to a title shot, one holding gold and one about to take his first belt in the company. I myself have not been able to produce shit except for a good promo in the past month. Matthew will make Sunday night about something so small and petty and thats why he will lose to me, that is why he will become another victim of Sequitus and in the end it is why he will be left laying in the ring at my hands
We open on Caliban and Sinnesy having breakfast in what looks like London England, they are there doing some press work and a particular UK panel show has picked up on the exchange between Matthew Robinson and himself over Caliban's actions against his wife a couple of weeks back
Sinney looks over the top over her shitty tabloid newspaper they are reading for jokes and considers him for a second
Sinney: You really wanna do this, you really wanna go on TV with 4 militantly scary females, on a show we both know your mother watches and try and defend yourself?
Jordan Caliban: Hell yes I do Matthew Robinson is exactly the kind of person I despise for his view on the world and the reasons he has for this match are just blindingly wrong and for too me I was offended by it. I am a dick, its a well known thing, some people consider me the most minor hated person in WCF right now but it isn't because of how I conduct myself in the ring. The match with Stacy was a representation of the respect I had for her in needing to try and throw her off her game just to get a shot in.
Sinney: He is going to try and tear you apart you know that right?
Jordan Caliban: The word you used there, I like that word, try, bigger people than Matthew Robinson have tried to take me out recently, Steve Orbit our current champion had a go and it took every boy he had to put me down in the end. Matthew is someone who I have seen since the first days in this company try his best and say all the right things but he can't get the job done. I showed that when I took out his trash for him.
Sinnesy: Lionheart was a long time ago Jordan, maybe he has grown some in the past few months
Jordan Caliban: Ill bet he has but nowhere near as much as I have I promise you that
Battle 2: Convincing the world
We open on a TV somewhere in a British Living room, the TV is on and a show is starting
We switch to the TV studio where Jordan Caliban is sitting looking confident in between 4 women of various ages
Head Crazy Bitch: Hi and welcome to the February 27th 2014 edition of loose women, we start today with a professional wrestler who was born in Northern Ireland but works for a company called World Championship Federation of Wrestling is that right?
Caliban (laughing): Close enough yeah
Blonde Crazy Bitch: Jordan I just want to cut in here because I was the one who brought this one up to our producers as the story is something myself and my 20 years younger than me husband is a big WCF fan
The crowd at this point breaks into a horrible cat call type chant about the Blonde chicks new husband, a shot of Caliban shows a look of “why am I here on his face” and then he gets a sharp reminder
Blonde Crazy Bitch: Now the story you are involved in right now and the one that brought you to us is that you are trying to justify inappropriately touching your opponent this coming Sunday's wife in a match a fortnight ago. Now to me I had to hear this from myself
Slightly younger perpetually single crazy bitch: Now hold on I have never met a wrestler before, tell us more about how you got into that particular proffesion
Jordan Caliban: The same way any footballer or rugby player does, I love it, I have done since I was a small child, you see this?
Caliban pulls down his t-shirt to reveal a massively swollen shoulder
Jordan Caliban: That's love, this is what I do and its all I want to do
Old Crazy bitch: Oh my god! What happened?
Jordan Caliban: My opponents wife happened to tell you the truth, you see this is my point, what we do we need advantages, we need our opponents to make mistakes, Stacy Robinson was a dangerous person who was standing in a ring ready and willing to hurt me and she did, pretty much the entire 20 minutes we where out there.
Blonde Crazy Bitch: But thats still no excuse for what you did surely
Jordan Caliban: I'll tell you what why don't you go and ask my wife of 4 years if I did anything wrong, go ask my mum or the other 12 women who raised me with very little male influence if they think I was genuinely being a pervert or a pig. They will tell you I was doing what I do for a living and thats be an **BEEP** hole and win wrestling matches
Old Crazy Bitch: Well Girlfriend's husband certainly doesn't see it that way
Jordan Caliban: Look there are a lot of weak people in my business, people with nothing to say for themselves in performance and in personality, they cling on to things they watched on TV, Matt's wife can handle herself probably better than he can. But Matt's main problem is that he is really the sexist one of the two of us. He would rather see us treat his wife like an angel while she makes tea in the kitchen instead of going out to the ring and spitting in the face
The crowd reacts with disgusted noises at this part
Jordan Caliban: See there you go, she spat in my face when I did what I did, now are you telling me that's not a woman who can handle someone trying to get in her head in the most natural way possible?
It's competition and Stacy is a competitor my opponent and the rest of my critics including you madam need to open your eyes and see that
The crowd reacts with OOOOOOO
Blonde Crazy Bitch: YOU HUMILIATED THE WOMAN ON NATIONAL TV TO MILLIONS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD! How can you justify that by saying it was the right thing to do?
Jordan Caliban: I didn't humiliate her at all, I gave her an opportunity to show the world that she is much much stronger than they all think she is and her husband thinks she should be. Matt is going into this fight because Stacy had an incredible match against me and he needs to prove he is just as good if not better than her. And that state of mind will do one thing for him and that's get him beat...
Head Crazy Bitch: WOW WOW WOW OK folks, Jordan I'm sorry but we have run out of time for this segment
Jordan Caliban: Of course, can I quickly say hi?
Head Crazy Bitch: Of course
Jordan Caliban: Hi mum and Aunt Ray I know you are both watching, I hope this has maybe made more sense of my actions to the world at large, we only do what we do to win, Sequitus lives forever. Thank you for having me on guys have a great day
The TV gets shut off as a stout little man ambles into the living room and shuts it off mumbling about crazy bitches and their stupid views wasting his electricity
Battle 3: Convincing the opponent
We open on Caliban in front of a dead rabbits graphic, he has an extremely pissed off look on his face and is vibrating on the spot
Jordan Caliban: DOES MATHEW ROBINSON HAVE ANY IDEA WHO IN THE FUCK HE IS DEALING WITH? Does he really think someone as advanced as me really has views on such trivial things as feminism, people are strong, it's their losses not their weaknesses that push them down. See Matt in my mind sex is not a divide, color is not a divide, class is not a divide, species... is... NOT... a divide. There is only one thing that separates human beings when the world is cut down to the bones, there are winners and there are losers and the truly strong are the ones who truly know what is worth fighting for and what it takes to win
Caliban laughs an lights a spliff produced from underneath his cap
Jordan Caliban: Hey Matthew
He points at the stitching above the snap at the back of the cap, it reads THINK FAST, he then turns it round to an 8 bit image of Sonic and Tails
Jordan Caliban: You need to realize that this match is not about Stacy, you need to stop making everything you do about her, WAKE UP AND REALIZE THAT YOU ARE GOING TO GET THE SHIT KICKED OUT OF YOU ON SUNDAY NIGHT. Your wife dislocated my arm, have I used that against you? No, she got her revenge and that chapter is over, this is why you are going to lose, its the reason you never put it down when it counts Matt. Life is about winning, its not about what kind of genetils you have, I realise this, I realise the value of wins and losses only and I will take that knowledge and state of mind and use it to annihilate you and your boring old Male Chauvinistic pig point of view. Matthew it saddens me that you are around, that incredible woman you try so hard to keep in your shadow would make a great inclusion to Sequitus, you can see it Matthew and the uncertainty breeds your anger and hatred of anyone who looks at her. Because they see her for what you are not and try not to see when you look into her eyes. On an evolutionary step she is higher than you, she is as much a part of Sequitus as the rest of us are she just doesnt want to participate in what it will take to put us there and leave the old crumbling male dominated, BORING! World behind
Final Battle: Convince your comrades, win the war
The final stop on Calibans Publicity tour is a Skype chat with the rest of Sequitus, they have all asked their questions and are now giving him the floor to speak before they all go back to their day
Jordan Caliban: I look at you all and I ask you this, do you really believe on a night that we literally have the world at our finger tips that I am going to let some pathetic soap opera drama shit get in the way of a totally dominant performance this week. See this my week where I need to step up, I can be the mouth behind Sequitus all I want and you guys don't seem to have a problem with that. This week isn't about Stacy and Matt's epic romcom love story, it's about Jordan Caliban finally being dominant in the WCF ring like I used to be. Guys the reason I have not really been talking much about our record right now is because I blame myself, we got 2 guys on the road to a title shot, one holding gold and one about to take his first belt in the company. I myself have not been able to produce shit except for a good promo in the past month. Matthew will make Sunday night about something so small and petty and thats why he will lose to me, that is why he will become another victim of Sequitus and in the end it is why he will be left laying in the ring at my hands
