yet another job squad (feedback appreciated)

[Ultimate destroyer]

OG is in a gym lifting this and that and trying ot get in to his old shape he was in before he left wrestling and entered the business world He realizes he should of said no to seconds on the desert cart and hes not even mentioning the cubans he puffs on occasionaly(well ok all the time) all those years ago but is now trying to make amends>




Hes got the wcf feed on a monitor in the corner listening to this and that amusedly then he hears rambling about his upcoming match by jordan caliban talking about some squad hes forming and rolls his eyes and presses a buton for a live feed to the wcf>







He stops the machine hes on and begins talking >




"So here we go yet again with yet another group claiming they've evolved over us peasants and they're the "true" masters of wrestling and they're special like some god bestowed enlightment on them yet again.... that what makes 4 or 5 this week alone? I'm used to such squabbling over turf and the like




Caliban your misguided belief in your superority will be your downfall sure you and your job squad might beat a few big names win a few titles before it blows up in your faces I mean I'm sure the wcf is littered with the bones of these so called super groups




And to be sure WE'll hand you your first setback just to show you that your human after all ......... And I'll make sure the beating you get will be enough to remind you every time you move that you arent bestowed any special powers or abilities and your group is just another bunch of fools with deluisions of grandeur that needs to be taken out with the trash .




As For the personal insults against me my skills and the like... no one gives a ratss ass of a tinkers damn in a flying fuck on anyone elses opinion so there just spouting a waste of time ..... i mean such claimed to be evolved beings of wrestling such as your self shouldnt resort to personal insults like us low life peasants <shrugs> think what you want but when it all comes down to it its all about who gets pinned in the ring .......




But for now I'm not giving a damn about winning or losing..... I'm looking to shut up loud mouth bastards that say there better than everyone else such as yourself




As for this other guy I dont know him and dont give a damn if he shows up or not if hes smart hell just stay outta the way so he dosent get hurt...........




Be prepared for the finish of your job squad before it even begins ..........




<He gets back on the exercise machine detrimined more than ever as the scene fades>

[Natural ICE Beckman]

I like the story line of your character. Your opening had a good set up with good details. I am always a big fan of adding punctuation and good spelling and think those little details might have helped out. Otherwise I liked the title and the pace. I thought it was an enjoyable read.