Post by raYne on Dec 22, 2013 12:20:03 GMT -5
OOC NOTE: unlike the preceding parts of 'road to one', these last two are both match roleplays.
odin... break out the template.
the following blog post was obtained from rayne-bow.cjb.net on the date of Wednesday, December 11th, 2013 @ 3:16pm --
Dear WCF,
Last night was the most remarkable, spectacular night of my life.
For on that night, the person that means more to me than anything or anyone on this earth made me the happiest person alive-- her vision met mine, she gazed straight into my heart and soul, with those gorgeous, beautiful grey eyes... and she told me she loved me.
For the past several hours, my life has been heaven.
But in eleven days?
I march into hell.
My head held high...
And one thing on my mind.
Her.
Yes, Moddie... that's right. You'd expect me to be focused squarely on you, right? You'd expect that my sights would be locked on your big, fat, bald head... right? That, if I want to win, if I wish to emerge victorious, the ONLY thing on my mind should be the man that's seething with rage after I DESTROYED his precious peterbilt pick-up... Right?
... Wrong. You couldn't be further from the truth.
You see Modster, buddy, in the past? I lacked true motivation. Sure, when I faced the Dhampir, Vlad, I sought revenge. He burned down my home, my jungle, the raYne Forest.
Mod, after I wrecked your vehicle, I brought forth your fury. Your wrath. After I took away the truck you spent every night passed out in after an all-day bender...
... that man set flame to an entire forest. A vast stretch of land, burnt to a crisp. Torn asunder, and he didn't think TWICE about it. People talk about how I bitch, moan and complain. Moddie... you may believe I don't know real pain... but I do.
When I faced Javex Valerius, my childhood hero, the Deite's Dragon... I was a rookie. And he was the XAW World Heavyweight Champion. And ever since I was a young boy, I held a secret I couldn't share with anyone.
JVX was my first male crush. And I fell hard. I didn't understand WHY I felt that way, I just did. I felt the same way about Javex that all my friends did about Pamela Anderson, or Angelina Jolie, or the local weather gal. The difference between my story and most that start out that way, is that I felt that way about the weather gal as well. But with Javex, I knew there just had to be something wrong. While I shared that same feeling that many of my guy pals did about female celebs... I knew none of them had those same feelings when it came to the men. That was a feeling that was supposed to be reserved for girls, with their Barbie dolls and EZ-Bake ovens and all those other tired cliches.
But when I saw Javex, with his wind-swept hair, and his glistening abs-- and the way he would soar through the air. He was always cool. Always calm. Always collected. His personality shone through in each and every last performance he gave. And when he spoke, I was captivated. Just like I am when I hear the gal's voice over Skype... in absolute awe. Star-struck. I longed to meet him in person, to know that MAYBE, in some small way, a guy like that could give a damn about me...
And so, years later, before I faced him in one of my first in-ring encounters, I saw him. Backstage. And my eyes widened. My pulse raced. My heart seemed like it could beat through my chest at any moment. I felt beads of sweat forming along my brow, and my hands began to shake. My nerves were shot. And he was coming my way.
I opened my mouth.
I told him I loved him.
And he laughed in my face.
...I felt like I could die.
Like I would be willing to make it so.
To never open my eyes again.
To never feel another pulse.
To never take another breath.
To rip my heart out of my own chest...
Though I felt as if he'd already done it for me.
I wanted to break down in tears. I wanted to bury my face in my hands, take off, and never let anyone see me again.
But as he passed right by me, brushed my shoulder as if I wasn't even there... I felt something in my heart.
After it broke, shattering into a thousand pieces and scattering across the floor... it began to reassemble.
Only, the jagged pieces were all that remained. It didn't feel like it was whole, some pieces were missing and what was left, fit to one another, but barely. Held together by the cheapest of glue.
And all of it blackened. Twisted.
That was the night I gave into the hate.
The night Reeve Gordon was born... again.
You may believe that words don't hurt, Moddie. But they do. Sometimes, though, silence hurts worse. It can cut like a knife. And while my heart, mind and spirit lie there, a bloody mess... my body walked through the curtains. I marched toward the ring, a ring encased by three or four tons of steel... a triple decker cell. We fought. For his World Title. He had chosen me as a warm-up, for his upcoming pay-per-view main event against Steven A. Kult. And he thought I'd be a pushover.
But I gave him more than he could ever imagine.
Every time he brought me down, I fought back. I rose up. And I kept on him, and I kept on him, and we battled from the bottom of the structure to the very top of that three-tiered cage. The title hung high above, and I should have been focused on it. I should have had my eye on my reason for fighting. Or at least, what SHOULD have been my reason for fighting. It was right there, within my grasp. I could have reached out, pulled it down, and won the greatest prize that company had to offer, in what was only my fifth or sixth televised contest.
But instead? All I could see, in my mind's eye, was what had taken place a handful of minutes before. The person I'd idolized, the first man to capture my heart... as he virtually spat in my eye and said everything you've said about me... without saying a word.
I was consumed.
I saw him climbing up the cage wall...
And I walked right past the title...
...Reaching down, grabbing him by the wrists, and forcing him off the top of the cell. Tossing JVX to the ramp below. He left a permanent dent that remained for a year. A reminder.
I felt a darkness creep into every facet of my being. An unexplainable, unshakable evil... My eyes stared down at his motionless body. And I loved what I saw. The man I'd looked up to for so many years, I now looked down upon. For he fell...
... hard.
I finally turned my gaze back to the belt above. But just as I did, Javex's best friend, Leary Garcia, stepped in front off me. While my focus had been trained on the carcass of the Dragon, Leary had scaled the cell. He had grabbed the belt, and proceeded to bludgeon me in the skull with it. And I fell. Not quite the fall Javex had taken, but I did drop to the roof of the second cage, and the match was ruled a no contest.
Mod, in all of that, one thing remains perfectly clear.
I was driven by fury. Anger. Contempt. Rage.
Revenge.
When I faced Javex, I had it all within my grasp. The opportunity to climb to the top of the heap in a matter of weeks, just as I'd stepped foot into the industry for the first time. But I let it slip through my fingers. Instead, I chose vengeance. And in the end? I was left with nothing. Just as when I faced Vlad, after he'd brought my raYne forest down to smoldering ash. I had chance after chance to claim something of his-- the Cruiserweight title. And yet? Every single time, I was overcome with a madenning hatred... and it tripped me up, again and again. I am straight edge, have been since birth. But for years, far, FAR too long, I've been addicted to one thing.
Revenge.
The insatiable desire to take the pain I've felt all my life, and to unleash it upon the world from whence it came.
And that same anger, Mod, is the same I see in you.
...And I couldn't be happpier.
For that anger shall prove to be your undoing.
Mod. Let me ask you a question.
What do you think I really looked to gain from blowing up your truck?
Hint-- it's the exact same thing Vladdy-kins hoped to achieve by burning down my Forest.
And he did
...And iAm.
You're pissed off.
You're ticked off.
And you're consumed by anger.
Just as I was.
And your judgement is clouded.
Just as mine was.
And you will slip up. Make a fatal mistake. And you will fall before me.
Just as I did before the Dhampir.
Every day, my phone rings off the hook, 24/7. My door has people banging on it from morning well into the evening. And I receive email affter email. Lawyers. Yours, WCF's... I can't escape them.
And that, Moddie? That's just fine. I've got cash. I've spent over a decade in this business, saving wisely each year. And at this point, I have enough cash to keep those jackyls at bay for eons to come, and then some.
But more importantly, come the 22nd? ONE, live from the Staples Center in L.A. The endless barrage of attorneys, the names you've hurled in my direction, every last pitfall I've had to cross along my 10+ year journey...
It will all be worth it.
Every drop of sweat, every ounce of blood, every tear I've shed from physical pain, emotional agony, spiritual suffering and mental torment... it's all going to pay off.
Why?
Because for years, revenge has been my only motive. To seek retirbution for the pain I've been dealt. To make others suffer as I have suffered.
No more.
Now?
SHE... is my motive. My reason. My reason to take care of myself, to become 100% again. My reason to fight, my reason to live. She urges me forward... and I move. And I keep pushing onward, fighting, never giving up, never calling it quits. Making it happen. Because I'm no longer driven by anger.
I'm driven by passion.
Her love.
My Goddess.
My "Sissy".
The only person on the face of the planet that I KNOW, without a shadow of a doubt, would love me, unconditionally, for all that I am. Every last jagged piece. The light and the dark. The day and the night. For better or for worse.
For what seems like ages, I have been lost. Wandering in a sea of spite, and lashing out at any and all that cross my path. Every time I'm within a hair's distance of glory... I have it snatched away. By the person in my reflection. Because all this time, anger, rage and fury have been my reason for fighting.
No.
More.
Now? She is.
She is my guiding light.
While you are driven in the sake of revenge...
iAm driven in the search to prove her right.
She believes in me. And I shall spend every waking moment showing the world why she has a reason to.
I told you three nights ago, at Slam, after I set your truck on fire... that this is personal. And it is. Because there is nothing in this life, that is more personal, than the one we love. And from this point forward? I live for her.
As for you? You are a game piece, Mod. In your quest to prove how different you are from me? You proved yourself to be a spitting image of my past.
A past I have left behind.
And I used the same hatred that once consumed me, to my very own advantage. I realize now why Vlad chose my Forest as his target. Because he knew my emotions would get the best of me. I would swing blindly, strike wildly... and I would fall. And I did. Every time.
And Mod? You will fare no differently. You stand where I once stood. Only the roles have been reversed. And this time... I no longer have a black heart, broken into fragments. Scattered and strewn about, trying oh so desperately to piece myself together again.
Thanks to her...
iAm whole.
iAm new.
iAm better.
Than you...
Than I ever was.
And at ONE?
You will be the one to break.
As I watch you shatter before my eyes.
Forget the umbrella.
Bring a broom.
Hannah Jo...
This ONE's for you, babygurl.
~ r.
<#
'ours'
"Hearts are overrated."
~ HJMMM
|t.b.c.|
#r_u_motherfuckers_ready?
odin... break out the template.
the following blog post was obtained from rayne-bow.cjb.net on the date of Wednesday, December 11th, 2013 @ 3:16pm --
Dear WCF,
Last night was the most remarkable, spectacular night of my life.
For on that night, the person that means more to me than anything or anyone on this earth made me the happiest person alive-- her vision met mine, she gazed straight into my heart and soul, with those gorgeous, beautiful grey eyes... and she told me she loved me.
For the past several hours, my life has been heaven.
But in eleven days?
I march into hell.
My head held high...
And one thing on my mind.
Her.
Yes, Moddie... that's right. You'd expect me to be focused squarely on you, right? You'd expect that my sights would be locked on your big, fat, bald head... right? That, if I want to win, if I wish to emerge victorious, the ONLY thing on my mind should be the man that's seething with rage after I DESTROYED his precious peterbilt pick-up... Right?
... Wrong. You couldn't be further from the truth.
You see Modster, buddy, in the past? I lacked true motivation. Sure, when I faced the Dhampir, Vlad, I sought revenge. He burned down my home, my jungle, the raYne Forest.
Mod, after I wrecked your vehicle, I brought forth your fury. Your wrath. After I took away the truck you spent every night passed out in after an all-day bender...
... that man set flame to an entire forest. A vast stretch of land, burnt to a crisp. Torn asunder, and he didn't think TWICE about it. People talk about how I bitch, moan and complain. Moddie... you may believe I don't know real pain... but I do.
When I faced Javex Valerius, my childhood hero, the Deite's Dragon... I was a rookie. And he was the XAW World Heavyweight Champion. And ever since I was a young boy, I held a secret I couldn't share with anyone.
JVX was my first male crush. And I fell hard. I didn't understand WHY I felt that way, I just did. I felt the same way about Javex that all my friends did about Pamela Anderson, or Angelina Jolie, or the local weather gal. The difference between my story and most that start out that way, is that I felt that way about the weather gal as well. But with Javex, I knew there just had to be something wrong. While I shared that same feeling that many of my guy pals did about female celebs... I knew none of them had those same feelings when it came to the men. That was a feeling that was supposed to be reserved for girls, with their Barbie dolls and EZ-Bake ovens and all those other tired cliches.
But when I saw Javex, with his wind-swept hair, and his glistening abs-- and the way he would soar through the air. He was always cool. Always calm. Always collected. His personality shone through in each and every last performance he gave. And when he spoke, I was captivated. Just like I am when I hear the gal's voice over Skype... in absolute awe. Star-struck. I longed to meet him in person, to know that MAYBE, in some small way, a guy like that could give a damn about me...
And so, years later, before I faced him in one of my first in-ring encounters, I saw him. Backstage. And my eyes widened. My pulse raced. My heart seemed like it could beat through my chest at any moment. I felt beads of sweat forming along my brow, and my hands began to shake. My nerves were shot. And he was coming my way.
I opened my mouth.
I told him I loved him.
And he laughed in my face.
...I felt like I could die.
Like I would be willing to make it so.
To never open my eyes again.
To never feel another pulse.
To never take another breath.
To rip my heart out of my own chest...
Though I felt as if he'd already done it for me.
I wanted to break down in tears. I wanted to bury my face in my hands, take off, and never let anyone see me again.
But as he passed right by me, brushed my shoulder as if I wasn't even there... I felt something in my heart.
After it broke, shattering into a thousand pieces and scattering across the floor... it began to reassemble.
Only, the jagged pieces were all that remained. It didn't feel like it was whole, some pieces were missing and what was left, fit to one another, but barely. Held together by the cheapest of glue.
And all of it blackened. Twisted.
That was the night I gave into the hate.
The night Reeve Gordon was born... again.
You may believe that words don't hurt, Moddie. But they do. Sometimes, though, silence hurts worse. It can cut like a knife. And while my heart, mind and spirit lie there, a bloody mess... my body walked through the curtains. I marched toward the ring, a ring encased by three or four tons of steel... a triple decker cell. We fought. For his World Title. He had chosen me as a warm-up, for his upcoming pay-per-view main event against Steven A. Kult. And he thought I'd be a pushover.
But I gave him more than he could ever imagine.
Every time he brought me down, I fought back. I rose up. And I kept on him, and I kept on him, and we battled from the bottom of the structure to the very top of that three-tiered cage. The title hung high above, and I should have been focused on it. I should have had my eye on my reason for fighting. Or at least, what SHOULD have been my reason for fighting. It was right there, within my grasp. I could have reached out, pulled it down, and won the greatest prize that company had to offer, in what was only my fifth or sixth televised contest.
But instead? All I could see, in my mind's eye, was what had taken place a handful of minutes before. The person I'd idolized, the first man to capture my heart... as he virtually spat in my eye and said everything you've said about me... without saying a word.
I was consumed.
I saw him climbing up the cage wall...
And I walked right past the title...
...Reaching down, grabbing him by the wrists, and forcing him off the top of the cell. Tossing JVX to the ramp below. He left a permanent dent that remained for a year. A reminder.
I felt a darkness creep into every facet of my being. An unexplainable, unshakable evil... My eyes stared down at his motionless body. And I loved what I saw. The man I'd looked up to for so many years, I now looked down upon. For he fell...
... hard.
I finally turned my gaze back to the belt above. But just as I did, Javex's best friend, Leary Garcia, stepped in front off me. While my focus had been trained on the carcass of the Dragon, Leary had scaled the cell. He had grabbed the belt, and proceeded to bludgeon me in the skull with it. And I fell. Not quite the fall Javex had taken, but I did drop to the roof of the second cage, and the match was ruled a no contest.
Mod, in all of that, one thing remains perfectly clear.
I was driven by fury. Anger. Contempt. Rage.
Revenge.
When I faced Javex, I had it all within my grasp. The opportunity to climb to the top of the heap in a matter of weeks, just as I'd stepped foot into the industry for the first time. But I let it slip through my fingers. Instead, I chose vengeance. And in the end? I was left with nothing. Just as when I faced Vlad, after he'd brought my raYne forest down to smoldering ash. I had chance after chance to claim something of his-- the Cruiserweight title. And yet? Every single time, I was overcome with a madenning hatred... and it tripped me up, again and again. I am straight edge, have been since birth. But for years, far, FAR too long, I've been addicted to one thing.
Revenge.
The insatiable desire to take the pain I've felt all my life, and to unleash it upon the world from whence it came.
And that same anger, Mod, is the same I see in you.
...And I couldn't be happpier.
For that anger shall prove to be your undoing.
Mod. Let me ask you a question.
What do you think I really looked to gain from blowing up your truck?
Hint-- it's the exact same thing Vladdy-kins hoped to achieve by burning down my Forest.
And he did
...And iAm.
You're pissed off.
You're ticked off.
And you're consumed by anger.
Just as I was.
And your judgement is clouded.
Just as mine was.
And you will slip up. Make a fatal mistake. And you will fall before me.
Just as I did before the Dhampir.
Every day, my phone rings off the hook, 24/7. My door has people banging on it from morning well into the evening. And I receive email affter email. Lawyers. Yours, WCF's... I can't escape them.
And that, Moddie? That's just fine. I've got cash. I've spent over a decade in this business, saving wisely each year. And at this point, I have enough cash to keep those jackyls at bay for eons to come, and then some.
But more importantly, come the 22nd? ONE, live from the Staples Center in L.A. The endless barrage of attorneys, the names you've hurled in my direction, every last pitfall I've had to cross along my 10+ year journey...
It will all be worth it.
Every drop of sweat, every ounce of blood, every tear I've shed from physical pain, emotional agony, spiritual suffering and mental torment... it's all going to pay off.
Why?
Because for years, revenge has been my only motive. To seek retirbution for the pain I've been dealt. To make others suffer as I have suffered.
No more.
Now?
SHE... is my motive. My reason. My reason to take care of myself, to become 100% again. My reason to fight, my reason to live. She urges me forward... and I move. And I keep pushing onward, fighting, never giving up, never calling it quits. Making it happen. Because I'm no longer driven by anger.
I'm driven by passion.
Her love.
My Goddess.
My "Sissy".
The only person on the face of the planet that I KNOW, without a shadow of a doubt, would love me, unconditionally, for all that I am. Every last jagged piece. The light and the dark. The day and the night. For better or for worse.
For what seems like ages, I have been lost. Wandering in a sea of spite, and lashing out at any and all that cross my path. Every time I'm within a hair's distance of glory... I have it snatched away. By the person in my reflection. Because all this time, anger, rage and fury have been my reason for fighting.
No.
More.
Now? She is.
She is my guiding light.
While you are driven in the sake of revenge...
iAm driven in the search to prove her right.
She believes in me. And I shall spend every waking moment showing the world why she has a reason to.
I told you three nights ago, at Slam, after I set your truck on fire... that this is personal. And it is. Because there is nothing in this life, that is more personal, than the one we love. And from this point forward? I live for her.
As for you? You are a game piece, Mod. In your quest to prove how different you are from me? You proved yourself to be a spitting image of my past.
A past I have left behind.
And I used the same hatred that once consumed me, to my very own advantage. I realize now why Vlad chose my Forest as his target. Because he knew my emotions would get the best of me. I would swing blindly, strike wildly... and I would fall. And I did. Every time.
And Mod? You will fare no differently. You stand where I once stood. Only the roles have been reversed. And this time... I no longer have a black heart, broken into fragments. Scattered and strewn about, trying oh so desperately to piece myself together again.
Thanks to her...
iAm whole.
iAm new.
iAm better.
Than you...
Than I ever was.
And at ONE?
You will be the one to break.
As I watch you shatter before my eyes.
Forget the umbrella.
Bring a broom.
Hannah Jo...
This ONE's for you, babygurl.
~ r.
<#
'ours'
"Hearts are overrated."
~ HJMMM
|t.b.c.|
#r_u_motherfuckers_ready?
