Hardcore Series: Lilith And I (#4)
Dec 21, 2013 21:46:07 GMT -5
Mr. Jack Happy, raYne, and 1 more like this
Post by Logan on Dec 21, 2013 21:46:07 GMT -5
Note: This televised promo was produced and written by Logan for the sole entertainment of WCF's fans. Hired actors portray different roles, the promo itself is mostly scripted, special effects along with cutting edge CGI are also on display, and no one is ever seriously hurt... or killed. Also big thanks to Lilith for writing some of her characters dialogue.
The cameras open with Christmas cheer, highlighting Logan and Lilith attired in spirit of red and green. The duo both had matching Santa hats strapped to their heads, with the little dangling white ball hanging just over Lilith's forehead. An array of colorful cards and unopened boxes of chocolates sat scattered among them on a table. And beside all of that Christmas joy - a half filled or for you pessimists, a half emptied syringe.
Logan: Merry Christmas, WCF!
He addressed the camera mounted directly in front of them.
Lilith: I love Christmas.
Logan: Who doesn't?
Lilith: The Grinch!
Logan: That hairy green boudle?
She nodded, the ball to the Santa hat wiggling with her movement. She blew it off her nose.
Logan: Today Lilith and I are taking a time out to acknowledge our fellow co-workers, soft jokes they may be, and wishing them all a Merry Christmas!
Lilith: And we're sending gifts too.
Logan: Precisely. Speaking of which... ah, here is a box of chocolates addressed to FPV. I heard he likes a nice taffy, so, thoughtful me went out and got him taffy.
Lilith: Actually I was the one who did all the running around picking up these gifts.
His brows furrowed a bit upon Lilith's interrupting.
Logan: With MY credit card.
Lilith: HEY! Someone has to pay for this crap!
Logan: Sigh. Yes. Have you prepared FPV's chocolates?
Lilith: I have.
Logan: And they're ready for his consumption?
Lilith: Very much so, Logi Bear.
Leaning into her, Logan carefully whispered into her ear. She grinned, not before whispering back. He did not approve of her response, considering his eyes nearly launched from their sockets.
Logan: Heroin?! I thought we were injecting these chocolates with Spider Killer.
Lilith: Isn't heroin bad for you too?
Logan: Perhaps, but we're not trying to get the guy high, we're trying to get him deathly ill!
Lilith: Don't get so bossy. Geez. You weren't that very specific to begin with.
A Hand of Treachery came crashing down onto the table causing a ruckus of chocolates to splash off and onto the ground.
Logan: You NEVER listen to me.
Lilith: I SAID DON'T GET BOSSY!
Logan: I knew you would ruin this you spoiled brat!
His eyes grew with horror upon looking down at his hand that Lilith had suddenly stabbed with the syringe, and there after ejecting a dose of heroin strong enough to make the hardest of junkies cringe. His eyes rolled back into his head revealing the whites, and he dropped backwards, bringing the chair with him. Only his out stretched legs and feet pointed skywards beside a now calm and grinning Lilith. She happily waved to the camera.
Lilith: Merry Christmas, WCF, and to all a terrible year!
She looked down and over to the unconscious Logan whom now foamed at the mouth. Her head shook with a grin, muttering something or another about him being a 'sleepy bear'.
The cameras reopened at a cafeteria somewhere in WCF's current establishment for One. Logan sat across from Roy Speede and a plate of hotdog's.
Roy: What has you so shaken up?
Logan: Do I look shaken up?
Roy: You do.
Logan: Maybe it's Lilith.
Roy: You like her don't you?
Logan: Let's for a moment understand the facts here without sounding cliched or dramatic as humanly possible. I'm not one who expresses his feelings because quite simply, Roy, I do not get them a lot.
Roy: No?
Logan: Sure. From time to time if a boudle is daring enough a rage will build inside me, and more likely than not release itself onto whomever is deserving of it. But admiration, respect, dare say... love? It's foreign to me.
Roy: What about me?
Logan: You're my Son, Roy. Heh... you and I get along just fine man! But others? Well, it's either only been for partnership purposes or for a reason. Or because it seemed logical. I've never truly desired the company of another person just for their company alone.
Roy: But Lilith is different?
Logan: I think so. She amuses me. Makes me... happy...
Roy: What about all the sexual jokes and pelvic thrusting you run around with?
Logan: It's all for laughs. Entertainment. I aim to please these sad morons. Someone has to.
He hit a pelvic thrust under the table and Roy did as well. Without hesitation, a staff member of the cafeteria interrupted Roy and Logan's conversation by dropping two fortune cookies next to them.
Roy: Fortune cookies? Since when did they start serving fortune cookies?
Logan: Well, when you're Mr. WCF you get special treatment around here.
Roy: That makes sense.
Logan: Perfect sense.
Sick with anticipation, Roy quickly crumbled his cookie and spread out the tiny paper between his fingers.
Logan: What does it say?
Roy: H'm... that's interesting. It says, make sure your Father checks his fortune cookie.
Logan: Well, shit, I guess I will.
The Face of Treachery breaks open his cookie as well and reads aloud the print.
Logan: Look up.
Roy: That's what it says?
Logan: Yes.
He 'looked up'. CRACK. A cafeteria tray smashed over Logan's head. He grabbed at his noggin with disturbed manner, looking up at his attacker to see Lilith with a tray in her hands and a grin on her face.
Lilith: Hiya, Logi Bear. Why didn't you invite me for lunch -
He exploded from his chair and dug his hand into Lilith's throat, slinging her body into the air like a rag doll and dropping her onto the table. In the midst of the destruction, others stopped eating and exited the room, while Roy Speede simply remained seated and plucked up another hotdog for consumption. Roy turned to the camera while Logan strangled Lilith just a foot beside him.
Roy: Usually I would be helping Logan right now, but I guess.. it's better to let 'Mommy' and Daddy settle their differences.
He bit off a chunk, calmly chewing and turning to see Lilith claw at Logan's choking hand.
Logan: Haven't you learned any better?
Her face turned a shade of blue yet she found the spirit to spit in his face and knee his groin. Logan huffed, staggering backwards, giving Lilith enough time to gather air.
Lilith: You could have called you soft bitch! Said you were having hotdog's. You haven't taken me out for hotdog's in over a week! A WEEK!
Logan: SHUT UP! Haven't you been watching television? I've been busy.
Lilith: Oh yeah? Well you're about to be real busy now.
She sprang from the table sending a stiff elbow into Logan's dome. Roy watched the devastating move, mimicking an 'ouch' with his lips, not before shoving another hotdog there.
Lilith: How'd ya like that Mr. Treachery?!
His hand slung over Lilith's face, the back of it smacking her cheek. She rubbed at her cheek, her eyes wide at Logan. She pushed into him, and he grabbed her throwing her over his head with a belly to belly suplex. Lilith crashed onto the table behind them and disappeared through it. Logan approached the mess, nonchalantly and jokingly dusting his hands off. Finally finding Lilith through the wreckage, she surprised him, stabbing his thigh with a sharp piece of the table that had broken off. He retracted backwards in pain, ripping the giant splinter from his flesh, and punching Lilith off her feet as she charged him once more. He bent down and scooped her up by her hair and dragged her towards the cooks section of the kitchen. With Lilith's head in his hands, he steadied her face over a pot of boiling water and began to push her down into it. Lilith's eyes lit up with shock.
Logan: Let's see how pretty a burned face suits you.
She didn't give him the right, giving his ribs a stiffened jam with her elbow. Logan clinched his side, and Lilith grabbed the pot of scolding water throwing it at Logan. He ducked and the water splashed onto a fridge, gathering up into a steamy puddle onto the floor.
Logan: You'd disfigure me?! ME?
He looked shocked, as if he weren't trying to do the exact thing to her just a second ago.
Lilith: Chicks dig scars.
And with that she slide a knife off the kitchen rack above her, the sound of the blade making a nasty sheik with its release. Wildly, Lilith slashed the blade through the air and into Logan, he backed into a freezer door, finally finding the right opportunity to grab Lilith's forearm and viciously bite down onto it to break skin and her grip on the knife. They both went on the attack all at once and all for one, head butting another at the exact time - causing them both to fall to knees and rest onto the other - forehead to forehead. Their chests heaved, their bodies began to bruise blue, and their lips met. Lilith clung her legs and arms over Logan's torso, pushing him down onto the floor with a lustful kiss. Logan's hands found her hips and their tongues intertwined. Roy stepped into the door way to check up on them, making sure one hadn't murdered the other. Finding them rolling on the floor in a lip lock, he breathed a sigh of relief.
Roy: Uh... I guess I'll just leave you guys alone.
The cameras faded with Logan and Lilith breaking lips to share a quick loving grin into one another's faces.
The cameras open with Christmas cheer, highlighting Logan and Lilith attired in spirit of red and green. The duo both had matching Santa hats strapped to their heads, with the little dangling white ball hanging just over Lilith's forehead. An array of colorful cards and unopened boxes of chocolates sat scattered among them on a table. And beside all of that Christmas joy - a half filled or for you pessimists, a half emptied syringe.
Logan: Merry Christmas, WCF!
He addressed the camera mounted directly in front of them.
Lilith: I love Christmas.
Logan: Who doesn't?
Lilith: The Grinch!
Logan: That hairy green boudle?
She nodded, the ball to the Santa hat wiggling with her movement. She blew it off her nose.
Logan: Today Lilith and I are taking a time out to acknowledge our fellow co-workers, soft jokes they may be, and wishing them all a Merry Christmas!
Lilith: And we're sending gifts too.
Logan: Precisely. Speaking of which... ah, here is a box of chocolates addressed to FPV. I heard he likes a nice taffy, so, thoughtful me went out and got him taffy.
Lilith: Actually I was the one who did all the running around picking up these gifts.
His brows furrowed a bit upon Lilith's interrupting.
Logan: With MY credit card.
Lilith: HEY! Someone has to pay for this crap!
Logan: Sigh. Yes. Have you prepared FPV's chocolates?
Lilith: I have.
Logan: And they're ready for his consumption?
Lilith: Very much so, Logi Bear.
Leaning into her, Logan carefully whispered into her ear. She grinned, not before whispering back. He did not approve of her response, considering his eyes nearly launched from their sockets.
Logan: Heroin?! I thought we were injecting these chocolates with Spider Killer.
Lilith: Isn't heroin bad for you too?
Logan: Perhaps, but we're not trying to get the guy high, we're trying to get him deathly ill!
Lilith: Don't get so bossy. Geez. You weren't that very specific to begin with.
A Hand of Treachery came crashing down onto the table causing a ruckus of chocolates to splash off and onto the ground.
Logan: You NEVER listen to me.
Lilith: I SAID DON'T GET BOSSY!
Logan: I knew you would ruin this you spoiled brat!
His eyes grew with horror upon looking down at his hand that Lilith had suddenly stabbed with the syringe, and there after ejecting a dose of heroin strong enough to make the hardest of junkies cringe. His eyes rolled back into his head revealing the whites, and he dropped backwards, bringing the chair with him. Only his out stretched legs and feet pointed skywards beside a now calm and grinning Lilith. She happily waved to the camera.
Lilith: Merry Christmas, WCF, and to all a terrible year!
She looked down and over to the unconscious Logan whom now foamed at the mouth. Her head shook with a grin, muttering something or another about him being a 'sleepy bear'.
LILITH AND I
The cameras reopened at a cafeteria somewhere in WCF's current establishment for One. Logan sat across from Roy Speede and a plate of hotdog's.
Roy: What has you so shaken up?
Logan: Do I look shaken up?
Roy: You do.
Logan: Maybe it's Lilith.
Roy: You like her don't you?
Logan: Let's for a moment understand the facts here without sounding cliched or dramatic as humanly possible. I'm not one who expresses his feelings because quite simply, Roy, I do not get them a lot.
Roy: No?
Logan: Sure. From time to time if a boudle is daring enough a rage will build inside me, and more likely than not release itself onto whomever is deserving of it. But admiration, respect, dare say... love? It's foreign to me.
Roy: What about me?
Logan: You're my Son, Roy. Heh... you and I get along just fine man! But others? Well, it's either only been for partnership purposes or for a reason. Or because it seemed logical. I've never truly desired the company of another person just for their company alone.
Roy: But Lilith is different?
Logan: I think so. She amuses me. Makes me... happy...
Roy: What about all the sexual jokes and pelvic thrusting you run around with?
Logan: It's all for laughs. Entertainment. I aim to please these sad morons. Someone has to.
He hit a pelvic thrust under the table and Roy did as well. Without hesitation, a staff member of the cafeteria interrupted Roy and Logan's conversation by dropping two fortune cookies next to them.
Roy: Fortune cookies? Since when did they start serving fortune cookies?
Logan: Well, when you're Mr. WCF you get special treatment around here.
Roy: That makes sense.
Logan: Perfect sense.
Sick with anticipation, Roy quickly crumbled his cookie and spread out the tiny paper between his fingers.
Logan: What does it say?
Roy: H'm... that's interesting. It says, make sure your Father checks his fortune cookie.
Logan: Well, shit, I guess I will.
The Face of Treachery breaks open his cookie as well and reads aloud the print.
Logan: Look up.
Roy: That's what it says?
Logan: Yes.
He 'looked up'. CRACK. A cafeteria tray smashed over Logan's head. He grabbed at his noggin with disturbed manner, looking up at his attacker to see Lilith with a tray in her hands and a grin on her face.
Lilith: Hiya, Logi Bear. Why didn't you invite me for lunch -
He exploded from his chair and dug his hand into Lilith's throat, slinging her body into the air like a rag doll and dropping her onto the table. In the midst of the destruction, others stopped eating and exited the room, while Roy Speede simply remained seated and plucked up another hotdog for consumption. Roy turned to the camera while Logan strangled Lilith just a foot beside him.
Roy: Usually I would be helping Logan right now, but I guess.. it's better to let 'Mommy' and Daddy settle their differences.
He bit off a chunk, calmly chewing and turning to see Lilith claw at Logan's choking hand.
Logan: Haven't you learned any better?
Her face turned a shade of blue yet she found the spirit to spit in his face and knee his groin. Logan huffed, staggering backwards, giving Lilith enough time to gather air.
Lilith: You could have called you soft bitch! Said you were having hotdog's. You haven't taken me out for hotdog's in over a week! A WEEK!
Logan: SHUT UP! Haven't you been watching television? I've been busy.
Lilith: Oh yeah? Well you're about to be real busy now.
She sprang from the table sending a stiff elbow into Logan's dome. Roy watched the devastating move, mimicking an 'ouch' with his lips, not before shoving another hotdog there.
Lilith: How'd ya like that Mr. Treachery?!
His hand slung over Lilith's face, the back of it smacking her cheek. She rubbed at her cheek, her eyes wide at Logan. She pushed into him, and he grabbed her throwing her over his head with a belly to belly suplex. Lilith crashed onto the table behind them and disappeared through it. Logan approached the mess, nonchalantly and jokingly dusting his hands off. Finally finding Lilith through the wreckage, she surprised him, stabbing his thigh with a sharp piece of the table that had broken off. He retracted backwards in pain, ripping the giant splinter from his flesh, and punching Lilith off her feet as she charged him once more. He bent down and scooped her up by her hair and dragged her towards the cooks section of the kitchen. With Lilith's head in his hands, he steadied her face over a pot of boiling water and began to push her down into it. Lilith's eyes lit up with shock.
Logan: Let's see how pretty a burned face suits you.
She didn't give him the right, giving his ribs a stiffened jam with her elbow. Logan clinched his side, and Lilith grabbed the pot of scolding water throwing it at Logan. He ducked and the water splashed onto a fridge, gathering up into a steamy puddle onto the floor.
Logan: You'd disfigure me?! ME?
He looked shocked, as if he weren't trying to do the exact thing to her just a second ago.
Lilith: Chicks dig scars.
And with that she slide a knife off the kitchen rack above her, the sound of the blade making a nasty sheik with its release. Wildly, Lilith slashed the blade through the air and into Logan, he backed into a freezer door, finally finding the right opportunity to grab Lilith's forearm and viciously bite down onto it to break skin and her grip on the knife. They both went on the attack all at once and all for one, head butting another at the exact time - causing them both to fall to knees and rest onto the other - forehead to forehead. Their chests heaved, their bodies began to bruise blue, and their lips met. Lilith clung her legs and arms over Logan's torso, pushing him down onto the floor with a lustful kiss. Logan's hands found her hips and their tongues intertwined. Roy stepped into the door way to check up on them, making sure one hadn't murdered the other. Finding them rolling on the floor in a lip lock, he breathed a sigh of relief.
Roy: Uh... I guess I'll just leave you guys alone.
The cameras faded with Logan and Lilith breaking lips to share a quick loving grin into one another's faces.
