Post by Deuce on Feb 27, 2013 18:03:41 GMT -5
Deuce is set up outside of a grocery store front door. He has a clipboard and is talking to an elderly woman on a ‘Hover-round’ (or a ‘Rascal’, depending on your geographic location.) He seems to be getting more and more animated before the lady zooms off, extending a foul-mouthed finger toward him. Deuce has an indignant look of shock.
Deuce: Well, I never!
He starts to go after her but Frank Longley Jr., who apparently has just arrived on the scene, hurries his last few paces to get there and restrain Deuce.
Frank: Deuce! What are you doing?!
Deuce: That lady needs a good talking-to about manners! Bah! Too late, she’s gone. That’s okay…God will teach her…and a lot sooner than she cares to admit.
Deuce goes back to his table and waits for the next ‘customer’ although Frank is still unmoved.
Frank: Deuce. What. Are. You. Do-Ing.
Deuce: I am signing people up to be in my corner, metaphorically speaking. I’m trying to garner 'Intent of Support' from the people before Sunday.
Frank: You are signing people up for support?
Deuce: Yep! And while I only have a few signatures, I feel things will pick up once those lookie-loos move on.
The camera pans over and you see five Girl Scouts standing, trying to look menacing. One is actually punching her fist slowly. Deuce leans over and stage-whispers to Frank.
Deuce: I may be encroaching on their turf. Be ready to rumble if it turns violent.
Frank: Deuce, this is ridiculous. You can’t expect to win by standing outside of a Food Tiger and signing pledges of support! And you especially can’t win with…
Frank looks at Deuce’s list and sees the ‘supporters’ that have signed up.
Frank: …’Munchma Quoochie?’(pronounced 'Munch my coochie.') ‘Wilma Fingerdew?’ Really?!
Deuce: (blissfully ignorant) Munchma was Iranian. International support!
Frank sighs deeply, almost his catch phrase now. He brings his hands to his head and remembers the package.
Frank: Oh, this box came for you…
Deuce’s eyes light up as he gleefully tears into the package. He truly is like a kid at Christmas as he looks into it.
Deuce: It’s finally done!
Frank: What is?
Deuce: I commissioned a physical representation of my victory at Timebomb this past Sunday. While I may not actually be in the tournament proper, this will serve as a reminder to all in the locker room that I am part of the tournament, especially to the four that I will be watching: Ana Valentine, Christopher Kane, Benjamin Atreyu and Skyler Striker. Did any of them look like they were having issues after their matches?
Frank: Not particularly.
Deuce: Hmm…well, anyway, I shall be wearing this to help people know that I am here to jump in if, and hopefully when, they fall!
Deuce pulls out the ‘device’ he had made and puts the medallion around his neck. Turns out…
Frank: That’s a Scarlet Letter, Deuce!
Deuce: It’s an A! And I know it’s red, Frank. It’s what I ordered.
Deuce stands with a Gothic A around his neck in the deepest scarlet hue. He looks pretty proud of himself as Frank wills the earth to swallow him whole. A lady walks up and, horrified, walks away quickly. The manager enters the scene.
Manager: Sir, I’m going to have to have to ask you to leave. You are deterring customers.
Frank: I am sorry, sir. We were just leaving.
Deuce: Yeah, it’s time to go. (To the Girl Scouts, not exactly angrily) Yeah, I’m leaving! But not because I’m intimidated! You see this letter?! You know what I did to earn it?! I’m not afraid of you, you miscreants! I represent…(he quickly looks at his list and chooses a name at random) …’Stu Padastle’s’(pronounced ‘Stupid Asshole’ ) everywhere!
Frank, as scarlet as Deuce’s ‘honor’, pulls him away and we go to black.
Deuce: Well, I never!
He starts to go after her but Frank Longley Jr., who apparently has just arrived on the scene, hurries his last few paces to get there and restrain Deuce.
Frank: Deuce! What are you doing?!
Deuce: That lady needs a good talking-to about manners! Bah! Too late, she’s gone. That’s okay…God will teach her…and a lot sooner than she cares to admit.
Deuce goes back to his table and waits for the next ‘customer’ although Frank is still unmoved.
Frank: Deuce. What. Are. You. Do-Ing.
Deuce: I am signing people up to be in my corner, metaphorically speaking. I’m trying to garner 'Intent of Support' from the people before Sunday.
Frank: You are signing people up for support?
Deuce: Yep! And while I only have a few signatures, I feel things will pick up once those lookie-loos move on.
The camera pans over and you see five Girl Scouts standing, trying to look menacing. One is actually punching her fist slowly. Deuce leans over and stage-whispers to Frank.
Deuce: I may be encroaching on their turf. Be ready to rumble if it turns violent.
Frank: Deuce, this is ridiculous. You can’t expect to win by standing outside of a Food Tiger and signing pledges of support! And you especially can’t win with…
Frank looks at Deuce’s list and sees the ‘supporters’ that have signed up.
Frank: …’Munchma Quoochie?’(pronounced 'Munch my coochie.') ‘Wilma Fingerdew?’ Really?!
Deuce: (blissfully ignorant) Munchma was Iranian. International support!
Frank sighs deeply, almost his catch phrase now. He brings his hands to his head and remembers the package.
Frank: Oh, this box came for you…
Deuce’s eyes light up as he gleefully tears into the package. He truly is like a kid at Christmas as he looks into it.
Deuce: It’s finally done!
Frank: What is?
Deuce: I commissioned a physical representation of my victory at Timebomb this past Sunday. While I may not actually be in the tournament proper, this will serve as a reminder to all in the locker room that I am part of the tournament, especially to the four that I will be watching: Ana Valentine, Christopher Kane, Benjamin Atreyu and Skyler Striker. Did any of them look like they were having issues after their matches?
Frank: Not particularly.
Deuce: Hmm…well, anyway, I shall be wearing this to help people know that I am here to jump in if, and hopefully when, they fall!
Deuce pulls out the ‘device’ he had made and puts the medallion around his neck. Turns out…
Frank: That’s a Scarlet Letter, Deuce!
Deuce: It’s an A! And I know it’s red, Frank. It’s what I ordered.
Deuce stands with a Gothic A around his neck in the deepest scarlet hue. He looks pretty proud of himself as Frank wills the earth to swallow him whole. A lady walks up and, horrified, walks away quickly. The manager enters the scene.
Manager: Sir, I’m going to have to have to ask you to leave. You are deterring customers.
Frank: I am sorry, sir. We were just leaving.
Deuce: Yeah, it’s time to go. (To the Girl Scouts, not exactly angrily) Yeah, I’m leaving! But not because I’m intimidated! You see this letter?! You know what I did to earn it?! I’m not afraid of you, you miscreants! I represent…(he quickly looks at his list and chooses a name at random) …’Stu Padastle’s’(pronounced ‘Stupid Asshole’ ) everywhere!
Frank, as scarlet as Deuce’s ‘honor’, pulls him away and we go to black.
