Post by Deleted on Jan 3, 2008 0:39:11 GMT -5
Date: Wednesday, January 2nd, 2008
Time: 8:22 AM EST
Location: Bobby Cairo's Estate, Hartford, Connecticut
[[Bobby Cairo did not get much sleep last night. After the rude reception to his endorsement speech for Mike Huckabee, a barrage of questions from the media awaited Cairo outside the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York. Cairo did not answer those questions and instead turned his cellphone off and drove home by himself to Connecticut. When Cairo awoke this morning in his bed, he had a feeling of impending doom in the pit of his stomach. Cairo tried to ignore it, but deep inside he feared that the fallout from his speech would get worse before it would get better. With his stomach in knots, Cairo opted to forgo his usual elaborate breakfast. To take his mind off his problems, Cairo grabs the remote control and plops down on the couch in his den.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Maybe the TV will take my mind off this shit. Ooh, pretty lady on the news!"
[[The pretty lady is CNN news anchor Robin Meade. A warm, happy feeling washes over Cairo as Robin's cheery face and heaving bosom light up the screen.]]
Robin Meade: "Repeating our top story from the campaign trail this morning, former Arkansas governor and Republican presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee has denounced wrestling superstar and political activist Bobby Cairo as a "dangerous extremist.""
Bobby Cairo: "What the fuck?"
Robin Meade: "Cairo endorsed Huckabee during a speech at a star-studded gathering last night in New York. However Cairo angered spectators with several inflammatory remarks during his speech. Huckabee addressed the situation to reporters during a campaign stop this morning in Iowa."
[[Cairo sits in stunned silence as the screen switches to a video of Huckabee standing in front of a gallery of reporters.]]
Mike Huckabee: "I watched Mr. Cairo's speech in its entirety and I have to say that I was appalled. Though I appreciate Mr. Cairo's support, I wholeheartedly disagree with his message of hate and intolerance. Mr. Cairo's speech epitomizes everything that's wrong with politics in America. Mr. Cairo's message is that of dangerous extremism and that's a message that I oppose. I'm proud to run an honest campaign that focuses on the issues rather than smears and attacks. I reject all forms of hate, because hate seeks only to destroy our nation. America has already been ravaged by a plague of partisan politics and we cannot continue down that path."
[[Cairo slumps down in his seat as the screen switches back to Robin in the studio.]]
Robin Meade: "Huckabee also left Cairo with a parting shot, one of his trademark zingers."
[[Back to Huckabee video.]]
Mike Huckabee: "Thankfully under my healthcare plan Bobby Cairo and all other mentally ill Americans will be able to get the help that they desperately need."
[[Back to Robin in the studio.]]
Robin Meade: "Ha-ha-ha! Isn't that great?"
[[While Robin laughs it up, Cairo grinds his teeth and his cheeks turn a bright red.]]
Robin Meade: "In related news, we have a developing story here at the CNN news center. Two Wendy's employees from New York are suing Bobby Cairo following an alleged altercation with the wrestling star. Joining me via satellite are Julio Rodriguez and Hank Ballard and their attorneys Ed Harper and Richard Bergstein. Gentlemen, good morning and welcome to the show."
[[As the screen switches to a split screen with Julio, Hank and their attorneys, Cairo's mouth is left agape, an absolutely shocked expression on his face.]]
Ed Harper: "Thank you, Robin. My client is grateful to have this opportunity to tell his side of an unfortunate story."
Richard Bergstein: "Good morning, Robin. Thank you for having us."
Robin Meade: "So tell me, what happened during this altercation with Bobby Cairo at Wendy's?"
Julio Rodriguez: "It was horrible, Robin. It all started last Sunday afternoon. I work as a cashier at Wendy's and I was taking an order from Mr. Cairo and his friend. His friend was very polite and didn't give me any hassle. Cairo, on the other hand, became increasingly belligerent as I attempted to take his order. He began screaming at me for no reason and demanded to speak with my manager."
Hank Ballard: "Hi, Robin. I'm Hank, Julio's manager at Wendy's. I could see that Julio was distraught when he walked over to me. Julio explained that Mr. Cairo was highly agitated and demanding to speak with me. I walked over and asked Mr. Cairo how I could help him. He mumbled something about an Air Supply burger and then leaped onto the counter and attempted to physically assault Julio and myself. Fortunately Mr. Cairo was restrained by two police officers that happened to be eating lunch in the dining area. If not for those two officers, I shudder to think what could have happened to Julio and I. As the officers were hauling Mr. Cairo away, he called me a nigger and threatened to kill me."
Julio Rodriguez: "Cairo called me a spic and threatened to murder my family. It was the most degrading experience of my entire life."
[[Julio and Hank are handed handkerchiefs by their attorneys as they both begin to shed tears. Hank appears especially shaken as he blows his nose very loudly into his handkerchief. Attorney Bergstein pats Hank on the shoulder and talks to him in a calm voice in an attempt to console him.]]
Ed Harper: "As you can see both of our clients have experienced a great deal of emotional trauma as a result of Mr. Cairo's actions, but it didn't end there."
[[Julio wipes his tears before speaking.]]
Julio Rodriguez: "Later that night as I was leaving the restaurant at the end of my shift, two large men in ski masks approached me in the parking lot. They began yelling profanities at me. I was terrified. I screamed for help and tried to run away, but they were really fast and they caught me. The one man held my arms back as the other man worked me over with karate kicks to my torso."
[[Julio stands up and unbuttons his shirt to reveal numerous bruises and abrasions on his chest and stomach.]]
Ed Harper: "Cairo's goons did this to my client and on top of that they stole his wallet! Cairo must pay for his transgressions. Together with Attorney Bergstein and his client, we are announcing our intention to file a fifteen million-dollar lawsuit against the estate of Bobby Cairo. Our clients were harassed and assaulted by Mr. Cairo and they did absolutely nothing to provoke such grievous attacks."
Richard Bergstein: "Cairo's behavior is typical of the rich and powerful. So often it seems that the privileged in our society believe that they can do whatever they please without consequence simply because they possess fame and fortune. Attorney Harper and myself are here to send a message to Mr. Cairo that even the affluential must be held accountable for their crimes."
[[Cairo throws the remote control at the TV in a fit of anger. Cairo walks into the kitchen, picks up the cordless phone and dials the number for his attorney Dave Kartel.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Dave, are you watching this shit on CNN?"
[[Cairo listens.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Of course it's not true. We had an argument, but they're totally blowing it out of proportion. I never threatened anybody and I never sent any goons to rough that kid up. It's a rough neighborhood, anybody could have done that. Why the hell would I have them steal the kid's wallet?"
[[Cairo listens.]]
Bobby Cairo: "I want you to make it go away, Dave. This is what I pay you for. Make this headache go away, now!"
[[Cairo slams the phone down on the charger. There's a knock at the front door.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Who the hell could that be?"
[[Cairo walks over to the door and looks out the peephole. It's Nick. Cairo unlocks the door and opens it.]]
Nick Katsopolis: "Bobby, are you okay? I tried calling you on your cell and the house phone, but all I got was voicemail."
Bobby Cairo: "I appreciate you concern, Nick, but things have not been going very well for me."
Nick Katsopolis: "Yeah I saw that on the news. Huckabee denounced your speech and he got in a pretty good zinger too."
Bobby Cairo: "Believe it or not, that was only the second worst thing that happened to me this morning."
Nick Katsopolis: "What are you talking about? Did you murder somebody in a blind rage?"
Bobby Cairo: "Not exactly. You remember that incident at Wendy's on Sunday with the black kid and the Puerto Rican? Well, those guys were on the news just now and they were making up all sorts of crazy lies about me. They're suing me for fifteen million dollars! The Puerto Rican kid claims that I hired goons to beat the shit out of him and steal his wallet."
Nick Katsopolis: "You didn't really do it, did you?"
Bobby Cairo: "What, are you crazy? Of course I didn't."
[[Nick looks straight into Cairo's eyes.]]
Nick Katsopolis: "Bobby, you did make some menacing allusions."
Bobby Cairo: "Come on, I was upset. I wouldn't hire thugs to rough people up. That's not my style. What am I, John Gotti or something? I talked to Dave and he's gonna see what he can do. Meanwhile I gotta get to the gym and work out with Bolts. I have a big match this week against Creeping Death and I can't let all this other shit distract me."
Date: Wednesday, January 2nd, 2008
Time: 3:46 PM EST
Location: Damien Demento's Gym, Long Island, New York
After a rough morning, Cairo wasn't exactly feeling like his normal confident self. Cairo tried to push his problems out of his mind. He tried to focus instead on his match against Creeping Death, but it was to no avail. Depression set into Cairo's mind, causing him to stop at every fast food restaurant along the way between Hartford and Long Island. When Cairo finally arrived at Damien Demento's Gym in stained sweatpants and undershirt, he wasn't in nearly the mental or physical state required to undergo his normal strenuous workout with Bolts.
Bolts Quackenbush: "Bobby, I've been waiting for you, where the hell have you been? Geez, you look like shit. What are those stains on your shirt and what's that I smell on your breath?"
Bobby Cairo: "Boneless barbecue wings from KFC, chili cheese burrito from Taco Bell, pepperoni and sausage pizza with garlic sauce from Papa John's, triple Whopper from Burger King, and a whole lotta Dr. Pepper and Milky Way bars."
[[Bolts scoffs and throws his hands up in disgust.]]
Bolts Quackenbush: "Are you trying to blow this match, Bobby? Do you even care about winning the WCF World Title?"
Bobby Cairo: "I don't care about the match or the title. Everybody hated my speech after I worked so long and hard on it. That bastard Huckabee disowned me. On top of that I'm being sued for fifteen million dollars by a couple of lying scoundrels and their scumbag lawyers. I worked so long and hard, I had such high expectations, but everybody hates me now."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Look, Bobby, I know it's been a rough day and I know it was a rough night last night, but you've always fed off of hate. Hate used to give you a boner and make you cum harder. Isn't that what you always told me?"
Bobby Cairo: "It used to, but that was before I reinvented myself. I've tried to become a man of the people, for the people, by the people. Now my reputation is destroyed. I'm sure that stupid Susan Sarandon is going to protest me with her stupid Commie buddies. Freakin' media clowns are gonna have a field day with this shit, hell they already are. I can picture Michelle Malkin and Anne Coulter saying "I told you so, Cairo!" Dumb, Neo-Con whores."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Fuck the media, fuck the critics and fuck the pundits. Do you think some bad publicity is going to change the way that the community looks at you? You've done great things for so many people. These people love you because you love them. That's real, it's not some fickle trend or passing fad. Frankly I never understood why you wanted to endorse somebody else for president. I thought you should have run yourself once you regained the World Title and went out on top of the wrestling world."
[[Bolts smiles, then taps Cairo on the shoulder with his fist. Cairo smiles too.]]
Bobby Cairo: "That's one hell of a dream. I am the man who didn't want to be king, but could I be the reluctant savior of a fallen empire?"
Bolts Quackenbush: "First things first, Bobby, let's work on beating Creeping Death. In fact let's try a mental exercise. You're the analytical type, what would you say to Death if he were standing here right now?"
[[Cairo closes his eyes and envisions standing face to face with Creeping Death.]]
Bobby Cairo: "I understand that you have pain. You've been harmed in so many ways. Is it the pain that motivates you? Do you relieve your suffering by inflicting torment upon others? When you destroy a man that becomes your tourniquet. Your body is a conduit for unleashing your misery upon others. I understand this, Death. I know what it means to burn. I lived in Hell for most of my life. The Devil used to grant me communion as a reward for my loyalty. It was a reward for claiming as many souls as I could. One day I had a revelation. I woke up and realized that the Devil had given me nothing more than eternal burden for my soul. That's when I stopped listening to the Devil, I ignored his temptations. I reclaimed my life in the name of God. I know that I can never erase the pain that I've felt or the pain that I've inflicted, but now I'm living my life to my full potential in His name. Can you even begin to comprehend the meaning of my words, Death? Your mind must be so fucked up. A scan of your brain would reveal a mess of tangled wires like some arcane industrial machinery, yet that doesn't begin to unveil the root of your psychosis. I can grant you the key to salvation, Death. Take my hand and walk with me to the pearly white gates. I want to save you. I want you to know that somebody really does care about you. In fact He cares about us all."
[[Cairo opens his eyes; the image of Creeping Death's painted face and sullen eyes instantly disappears.]]
Bolts Quackenbush: "That was very good, Bobby. How do you feel?"
Bobby Cairo: "I feel at peace. I have no worries. I am ready for combat."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Not yet, Bobby. First I want you to study some videotapes. Come with me."
[[Cairo follows Bolts into the film room. Most gyms would not have film rooms, but this is Damien Demento's gym and it is the best. On the floor there are several cardboard boxes filled with VHS tapes. The tapes have labels printed on them in black marker listing names, dates, venues, etc.]]
Bobby Cairo: "What's all of this stuff?"
Bolts Quackenbush: "This is every Creeping Death match ever committed to tape. I don't suspect that we'll have time to study all of these matches. Especially since we have a lot of work to do in the ring, on the bags, in the weight room--"
Bobby Cairo: "Yeah, I know the drill."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Fortunately I had the guys at Brain Tree Productions in Brooklyn sort through all of these tapes and they spliced together a compilation of Creeping Death's greatest matches. We're gonna study that tape like it's the gospel. Then we're gonna look at all of Death's recent matches from WCF Japan. We're gonna study his decisive victory last week over JJ Biggs, a man who defeated you to win the WCF World Title."
[[Cairo rolls his eyes.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Yes, I remember, worst day of my career. Thank you for reminding me."
Bolts Quackenbush: "That feeling of defeat is what should motivate you, Bobby. Remember it, burn it into your brain. Don't ever let it slip away. It gives you an edge."
Bobby Cairo: "Not a straight edge, I hope? I hate those freaks."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Nope, a killer's edge, maybe even a razor's edge."
Bobby Cairo: "Scott Hall?"
Bolts Quackenbush: "I think we're getting sidetracked. Let's pop these tapes in and get to work. I want to scout these tapes and still get a workout in today, so we have a lot of work to do."
Bobby Cairo: "Great, I'll get the popcorn."
[[Bolts pokes Cairo's stomach with his finger.]]
Bolts Quackenbush: "I think you've had enough."
Bobby Cairo: "Just a joke."
[[Bolts pops the first tape into the VCR as Cairo takes a seat; a serious look suddenly comes across Cairo's face as he focuses intently on his next opponent...]]
Time: 8:22 AM EST
Location: Bobby Cairo's Estate, Hartford, Connecticut
[[Bobby Cairo did not get much sleep last night. After the rude reception to his endorsement speech for Mike Huckabee, a barrage of questions from the media awaited Cairo outside the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York. Cairo did not answer those questions and instead turned his cellphone off and drove home by himself to Connecticut. When Cairo awoke this morning in his bed, he had a feeling of impending doom in the pit of his stomach. Cairo tried to ignore it, but deep inside he feared that the fallout from his speech would get worse before it would get better. With his stomach in knots, Cairo opted to forgo his usual elaborate breakfast. To take his mind off his problems, Cairo grabs the remote control and plops down on the couch in his den.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Maybe the TV will take my mind off this shit. Ooh, pretty lady on the news!"
[[The pretty lady is CNN news anchor Robin Meade. A warm, happy feeling washes over Cairo as Robin's cheery face and heaving bosom light up the screen.]]
Robin Meade: "Repeating our top story from the campaign trail this morning, former Arkansas governor and Republican presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee has denounced wrestling superstar and political activist Bobby Cairo as a "dangerous extremist.""
Bobby Cairo: "What the fuck?"
Robin Meade: "Cairo endorsed Huckabee during a speech at a star-studded gathering last night in New York. However Cairo angered spectators with several inflammatory remarks during his speech. Huckabee addressed the situation to reporters during a campaign stop this morning in Iowa."
[[Cairo sits in stunned silence as the screen switches to a video of Huckabee standing in front of a gallery of reporters.]]
Mike Huckabee: "I watched Mr. Cairo's speech in its entirety and I have to say that I was appalled. Though I appreciate Mr. Cairo's support, I wholeheartedly disagree with his message of hate and intolerance. Mr. Cairo's speech epitomizes everything that's wrong with politics in America. Mr. Cairo's message is that of dangerous extremism and that's a message that I oppose. I'm proud to run an honest campaign that focuses on the issues rather than smears and attacks. I reject all forms of hate, because hate seeks only to destroy our nation. America has already been ravaged by a plague of partisan politics and we cannot continue down that path."
[[Cairo slumps down in his seat as the screen switches back to Robin in the studio.]]
Robin Meade: "Huckabee also left Cairo with a parting shot, one of his trademark zingers."
[[Back to Huckabee video.]]
Mike Huckabee: "Thankfully under my healthcare plan Bobby Cairo and all other mentally ill Americans will be able to get the help that they desperately need."
[[Back to Robin in the studio.]]
Robin Meade: "Ha-ha-ha! Isn't that great?"
[[While Robin laughs it up, Cairo grinds his teeth and his cheeks turn a bright red.]]
Robin Meade: "In related news, we have a developing story here at the CNN news center. Two Wendy's employees from New York are suing Bobby Cairo following an alleged altercation with the wrestling star. Joining me via satellite are Julio Rodriguez and Hank Ballard and their attorneys Ed Harper and Richard Bergstein. Gentlemen, good morning and welcome to the show."
[[As the screen switches to a split screen with Julio, Hank and their attorneys, Cairo's mouth is left agape, an absolutely shocked expression on his face.]]
Ed Harper: "Thank you, Robin. My client is grateful to have this opportunity to tell his side of an unfortunate story."
Richard Bergstein: "Good morning, Robin. Thank you for having us."
Robin Meade: "So tell me, what happened during this altercation with Bobby Cairo at Wendy's?"
Julio Rodriguez: "It was horrible, Robin. It all started last Sunday afternoon. I work as a cashier at Wendy's and I was taking an order from Mr. Cairo and his friend. His friend was very polite and didn't give me any hassle. Cairo, on the other hand, became increasingly belligerent as I attempted to take his order. He began screaming at me for no reason and demanded to speak with my manager."
Hank Ballard: "Hi, Robin. I'm Hank, Julio's manager at Wendy's. I could see that Julio was distraught when he walked over to me. Julio explained that Mr. Cairo was highly agitated and demanding to speak with me. I walked over and asked Mr. Cairo how I could help him. He mumbled something about an Air Supply burger and then leaped onto the counter and attempted to physically assault Julio and myself. Fortunately Mr. Cairo was restrained by two police officers that happened to be eating lunch in the dining area. If not for those two officers, I shudder to think what could have happened to Julio and I. As the officers were hauling Mr. Cairo away, he called me a nigger and threatened to kill me."
Julio Rodriguez: "Cairo called me a spic and threatened to murder my family. It was the most degrading experience of my entire life."
[[Julio and Hank are handed handkerchiefs by their attorneys as they both begin to shed tears. Hank appears especially shaken as he blows his nose very loudly into his handkerchief. Attorney Bergstein pats Hank on the shoulder and talks to him in a calm voice in an attempt to console him.]]
Ed Harper: "As you can see both of our clients have experienced a great deal of emotional trauma as a result of Mr. Cairo's actions, but it didn't end there."
[[Julio wipes his tears before speaking.]]
Julio Rodriguez: "Later that night as I was leaving the restaurant at the end of my shift, two large men in ski masks approached me in the parking lot. They began yelling profanities at me. I was terrified. I screamed for help and tried to run away, but they were really fast and they caught me. The one man held my arms back as the other man worked me over with karate kicks to my torso."
[[Julio stands up and unbuttons his shirt to reveal numerous bruises and abrasions on his chest and stomach.]]
Ed Harper: "Cairo's goons did this to my client and on top of that they stole his wallet! Cairo must pay for his transgressions. Together with Attorney Bergstein and his client, we are announcing our intention to file a fifteen million-dollar lawsuit against the estate of Bobby Cairo. Our clients were harassed and assaulted by Mr. Cairo and they did absolutely nothing to provoke such grievous attacks."
Richard Bergstein: "Cairo's behavior is typical of the rich and powerful. So often it seems that the privileged in our society believe that they can do whatever they please without consequence simply because they possess fame and fortune. Attorney Harper and myself are here to send a message to Mr. Cairo that even the affluential must be held accountable for their crimes."
[[Cairo throws the remote control at the TV in a fit of anger. Cairo walks into the kitchen, picks up the cordless phone and dials the number for his attorney Dave Kartel.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Dave, are you watching this shit on CNN?"
[[Cairo listens.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Of course it's not true. We had an argument, but they're totally blowing it out of proportion. I never threatened anybody and I never sent any goons to rough that kid up. It's a rough neighborhood, anybody could have done that. Why the hell would I have them steal the kid's wallet?"
[[Cairo listens.]]
Bobby Cairo: "I want you to make it go away, Dave. This is what I pay you for. Make this headache go away, now!"
[[Cairo slams the phone down on the charger. There's a knock at the front door.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Who the hell could that be?"
[[Cairo walks over to the door and looks out the peephole. It's Nick. Cairo unlocks the door and opens it.]]
Nick Katsopolis: "Bobby, are you okay? I tried calling you on your cell and the house phone, but all I got was voicemail."
Bobby Cairo: "I appreciate you concern, Nick, but things have not been going very well for me."
Nick Katsopolis: "Yeah I saw that on the news. Huckabee denounced your speech and he got in a pretty good zinger too."
Bobby Cairo: "Believe it or not, that was only the second worst thing that happened to me this morning."
Nick Katsopolis: "What are you talking about? Did you murder somebody in a blind rage?"
Bobby Cairo: "Not exactly. You remember that incident at Wendy's on Sunday with the black kid and the Puerto Rican? Well, those guys were on the news just now and they were making up all sorts of crazy lies about me. They're suing me for fifteen million dollars! The Puerto Rican kid claims that I hired goons to beat the shit out of him and steal his wallet."
Nick Katsopolis: "You didn't really do it, did you?"
Bobby Cairo: "What, are you crazy? Of course I didn't."
[[Nick looks straight into Cairo's eyes.]]
Nick Katsopolis: "Bobby, you did make some menacing allusions."
Bobby Cairo: "Come on, I was upset. I wouldn't hire thugs to rough people up. That's not my style. What am I, John Gotti or something? I talked to Dave and he's gonna see what he can do. Meanwhile I gotta get to the gym and work out with Bolts. I have a big match this week against Creeping Death and I can't let all this other shit distract me."
Date: Wednesday, January 2nd, 2008
Time: 3:46 PM EST
Location: Damien Demento's Gym, Long Island, New York
After a rough morning, Cairo wasn't exactly feeling like his normal confident self. Cairo tried to push his problems out of his mind. He tried to focus instead on his match against Creeping Death, but it was to no avail. Depression set into Cairo's mind, causing him to stop at every fast food restaurant along the way between Hartford and Long Island. When Cairo finally arrived at Damien Demento's Gym in stained sweatpants and undershirt, he wasn't in nearly the mental or physical state required to undergo his normal strenuous workout with Bolts.
Bolts Quackenbush: "Bobby, I've been waiting for you, where the hell have you been? Geez, you look like shit. What are those stains on your shirt and what's that I smell on your breath?"
Bobby Cairo: "Boneless barbecue wings from KFC, chili cheese burrito from Taco Bell, pepperoni and sausage pizza with garlic sauce from Papa John's, triple Whopper from Burger King, and a whole lotta Dr. Pepper and Milky Way bars."
[[Bolts scoffs and throws his hands up in disgust.]]
Bolts Quackenbush: "Are you trying to blow this match, Bobby? Do you even care about winning the WCF World Title?"
Bobby Cairo: "I don't care about the match or the title. Everybody hated my speech after I worked so long and hard on it. That bastard Huckabee disowned me. On top of that I'm being sued for fifteen million dollars by a couple of lying scoundrels and their scumbag lawyers. I worked so long and hard, I had such high expectations, but everybody hates me now."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Look, Bobby, I know it's been a rough day and I know it was a rough night last night, but you've always fed off of hate. Hate used to give you a boner and make you cum harder. Isn't that what you always told me?"
Bobby Cairo: "It used to, but that was before I reinvented myself. I've tried to become a man of the people, for the people, by the people. Now my reputation is destroyed. I'm sure that stupid Susan Sarandon is going to protest me with her stupid Commie buddies. Freakin' media clowns are gonna have a field day with this shit, hell they already are. I can picture Michelle Malkin and Anne Coulter saying "I told you so, Cairo!" Dumb, Neo-Con whores."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Fuck the media, fuck the critics and fuck the pundits. Do you think some bad publicity is going to change the way that the community looks at you? You've done great things for so many people. These people love you because you love them. That's real, it's not some fickle trend or passing fad. Frankly I never understood why you wanted to endorse somebody else for president. I thought you should have run yourself once you regained the World Title and went out on top of the wrestling world."
[[Bolts smiles, then taps Cairo on the shoulder with his fist. Cairo smiles too.]]
Bobby Cairo: "That's one hell of a dream. I am the man who didn't want to be king, but could I be the reluctant savior of a fallen empire?"
Bolts Quackenbush: "First things first, Bobby, let's work on beating Creeping Death. In fact let's try a mental exercise. You're the analytical type, what would you say to Death if he were standing here right now?"
[[Cairo closes his eyes and envisions standing face to face with Creeping Death.]]
Bobby Cairo: "I understand that you have pain. You've been harmed in so many ways. Is it the pain that motivates you? Do you relieve your suffering by inflicting torment upon others? When you destroy a man that becomes your tourniquet. Your body is a conduit for unleashing your misery upon others. I understand this, Death. I know what it means to burn. I lived in Hell for most of my life. The Devil used to grant me communion as a reward for my loyalty. It was a reward for claiming as many souls as I could. One day I had a revelation. I woke up and realized that the Devil had given me nothing more than eternal burden for my soul. That's when I stopped listening to the Devil, I ignored his temptations. I reclaimed my life in the name of God. I know that I can never erase the pain that I've felt or the pain that I've inflicted, but now I'm living my life to my full potential in His name. Can you even begin to comprehend the meaning of my words, Death? Your mind must be so fucked up. A scan of your brain would reveal a mess of tangled wires like some arcane industrial machinery, yet that doesn't begin to unveil the root of your psychosis. I can grant you the key to salvation, Death. Take my hand and walk with me to the pearly white gates. I want to save you. I want you to know that somebody really does care about you. In fact He cares about us all."
[[Cairo opens his eyes; the image of Creeping Death's painted face and sullen eyes instantly disappears.]]
Bolts Quackenbush: "That was very good, Bobby. How do you feel?"
Bobby Cairo: "I feel at peace. I have no worries. I am ready for combat."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Not yet, Bobby. First I want you to study some videotapes. Come with me."
[[Cairo follows Bolts into the film room. Most gyms would not have film rooms, but this is Damien Demento's gym and it is the best. On the floor there are several cardboard boxes filled with VHS tapes. The tapes have labels printed on them in black marker listing names, dates, venues, etc.]]
Bobby Cairo: "What's all of this stuff?"
Bolts Quackenbush: "This is every Creeping Death match ever committed to tape. I don't suspect that we'll have time to study all of these matches. Especially since we have a lot of work to do in the ring, on the bags, in the weight room--"
Bobby Cairo: "Yeah, I know the drill."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Fortunately I had the guys at Brain Tree Productions in Brooklyn sort through all of these tapes and they spliced together a compilation of Creeping Death's greatest matches. We're gonna study that tape like it's the gospel. Then we're gonna look at all of Death's recent matches from WCF Japan. We're gonna study his decisive victory last week over JJ Biggs, a man who defeated you to win the WCF World Title."
[[Cairo rolls his eyes.]]
Bobby Cairo: "Yes, I remember, worst day of my career. Thank you for reminding me."
Bolts Quackenbush: "That feeling of defeat is what should motivate you, Bobby. Remember it, burn it into your brain. Don't ever let it slip away. It gives you an edge."
Bobby Cairo: "Not a straight edge, I hope? I hate those freaks."
Bolts Quackenbush: "Nope, a killer's edge, maybe even a razor's edge."
Bobby Cairo: "Scott Hall?"
Bolts Quackenbush: "I think we're getting sidetracked. Let's pop these tapes in and get to work. I want to scout these tapes and still get a workout in today, so we have a lot of work to do."
Bobby Cairo: "Great, I'll get the popcorn."
[[Bolts pokes Cairo's stomach with his finger.]]
Bolts Quackenbush: "I think you've had enough."
Bobby Cairo: "Just a joke."
[[Bolts pops the first tape into the VCR as Cairo takes a seat; a serious look suddenly comes across Cairo's face as he focuses intently on his next opponent...]]
