Post by recklessjack on May 21, 2007 10:45:56 GMT -5
We open up in a hotel looking ball room that has a table set up. There are three chairs there along with some various papers. There is also a banner hanging off the table that reads...
Then walk in Reckless Jack wearing a jeans, a white shirt and a jacket it over it. Jay Williams follows him in a Killswitch Engage hoodie in some shorts. Behind him comes Amy Skye Williams in a jogging suit holding a bag of Doritos. The three sit down and look over a few things.
Reckless Jack: It wouldn't have killed you to dress up for this yanno.
Jay Williams: Hey, I ain't gotta impress nobody. I'm stuck for life.
Amy smacks Jay on the head.
Jay Williams: Only kidding love.
Amy smiles and starts to cry.
Reckless Jack: Oh good christ, the hormones are already going wild. I feel for ya Jay, I really do. Had to go through this shit twice, sort of...
Jay nods.
Jay Williams: ...Yeah. No need to go through that again.
Reckless Jack: Nope.
A silence fills the room as Amy munches on some chips. Jay looks over at Jack.
Jay Williams: So, you think we should explain what is going on?
Reckless Jack: Doesn't the banner say enough?
Jay stands up and leans over the table, seeing that there is a banner in place.
Jay Williams: Oh, well, what if a blind person is watch... err... listening?
Reckless Jack: You got a point there. Alright, for the hearing impaired, this is Girlfriend Search 2007. Apparently I hang around Jay and Amy too much and its pissing them off and they have repeatedly told me to get a girlfriend. So we set out newsletters, emails, TV ads, movie trailers, video games, etc about this. The response was overwhelming. There was a total of ten women wanting to be the girlfriend of the biggest, most awesome guy in the world.
Jay Williams: That surely can't be you!
Reckless Jack: Oh but it is! Anyways, now that the explanation is out of the way, let's get this show on the road. Who do we have first Jay?
Jay looks over a piece of paper for a second.
Jay Williams: Our first woman is Marsha [last named edited.] She is from some town in Kansas. She enjoys chick flicks, holding hands and having a wonderful conversation after love making with a man that loves her.
Reckless Jack: Oh christ...
She walks in...
There is a near by chair she sits down in.
Jay Williams: Hi Marsha, I'm Jay, the woman over there is Amy and the man sitting next to me is none other then...
Jack cuts him off.
Reckless Jack: Reckless Jack, the man of the hour. So Marsha, what made come here today to be interviewed?
Marsha thinks about it for a moment.
Marsha: Well, I saw a TV advertisement about it a few days ago and thought it would be a fun experience. I've seen you on some TV shows, not wrestling though. Sorry.
Reckless Jack: Hey no worries.
Jay Williams: What could you offer to my friend over here?
Marsha ponders the question.
Marsha: I can offer him the love of Jesus...
Reckless Jack: NEXT, NEXT, NEXT, NEXT, NEXT!
Marsha: But... what?
Reckless Jack: Baby, I like to fuck on the first date... so yeah, you aren't in the running.
Marsha: But you don't know me!
Jay Williams: Marsha, GET THE FUCK OUT!
Some music plays as she starts to cry and leave. Reckless Jack shakes his head.
Reckless Jack: Jesus freaks suck but not really suck.
Jay Williams: No shit.
Amy Skye Williams: You should have treated her better. I thought she was nice and friendly. Not some dumb whore.
Reckless Jack: Yeah, you'd know about being a whore...
Jay slaps his forehead as Amy glares at Jack while eating her chips. Jay looks over the next piece of paper.
Jay Williams: Alright, next woman is named... Lucy? Wow, how odd is that? Says here she likes to be double penetrated... the hell? Is this a joke entry?
No it's not as Lucy walks through the door.
Reckless Jack: WHAT THE FUCK, NO, NO NONO NONONONONONONNONONONONONO!
Jay Williams: Uh oh...
Amy Skye Williams: Hahahahahahahaha, this outta be good... that fucker Jack will get what's coming to him.
Jay Williams: And apparently, she was came on too.
She sits down on the chair.
Jay Williams: So uh...
Reckless Jack: No, you leave now, get the fuck outta here Lucy.
Lucy: But I still love you! Sure I cheated on you with your best friend, got an abortion of your child and divorced you but I still love you! I'll suck you now!
Reckless Jack: Security, get this whore out of here!
Security comes in and takes Lucy out of here, kicking and screaming.
Amy Skye Williams: I found her to look like a porn star.
Jay Williams: Hey Jack, wasn't she in a porn?
Reckless Jack: ...Yes, while we were married...
Amy Skye Williams: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, YOU MARRIED A WHORE, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Reckless Jack stands up.
Reckless Jack: Okay, we are done for now, fuck this. I need a beer.
He leaves as Jay and Amy stay, looking at the sheets.
"GIRLFRIEND SEARCH 2007"
Then walk in Reckless Jack wearing a jeans, a white shirt and a jacket it over it. Jay Williams follows him in a Killswitch Engage hoodie in some shorts. Behind him comes Amy Skye Williams in a jogging suit holding a bag of Doritos. The three sit down and look over a few things.
Reckless Jack: It wouldn't have killed you to dress up for this yanno.
Jay Williams: Hey, I ain't gotta impress nobody. I'm stuck for life.
Amy smacks Jay on the head.
Jay Williams: Only kidding love.
Amy smiles and starts to cry.
Reckless Jack: Oh good christ, the hormones are already going wild. I feel for ya Jay, I really do. Had to go through this shit twice, sort of...
Jay nods.
Jay Williams: ...Yeah. No need to go through that again.
Reckless Jack: Nope.
A silence fills the room as Amy munches on some chips. Jay looks over at Jack.
Jay Williams: So, you think we should explain what is going on?
Reckless Jack: Doesn't the banner say enough?
Jay stands up and leans over the table, seeing that there is a banner in place.
Jay Williams: Oh, well, what if a blind person is watch... err... listening?
Reckless Jack: You got a point there. Alright, for the hearing impaired, this is Girlfriend Search 2007. Apparently I hang around Jay and Amy too much and its pissing them off and they have repeatedly told me to get a girlfriend. So we set out newsletters, emails, TV ads, movie trailers, video games, etc about this. The response was overwhelming. There was a total of ten women wanting to be the girlfriend of the biggest, most awesome guy in the world.
Jay Williams: That surely can't be you!
Reckless Jack: Oh but it is! Anyways, now that the explanation is out of the way, let's get this show on the road. Who do we have first Jay?
Jay looks over a piece of paper for a second.
Jay Williams: Our first woman is Marsha [last named edited.] She is from some town in Kansas. She enjoys chick flicks, holding hands and having a wonderful conversation after love making with a man that loves her.
Reckless Jack: Oh christ...
She walks in...
There is a near by chair she sits down in.
Jay Williams: Hi Marsha, I'm Jay, the woman over there is Amy and the man sitting next to me is none other then...
Jack cuts him off.
Reckless Jack: Reckless Jack, the man of the hour. So Marsha, what made come here today to be interviewed?
Marsha thinks about it for a moment.
Marsha: Well, I saw a TV advertisement about it a few days ago and thought it would be a fun experience. I've seen you on some TV shows, not wrestling though. Sorry.
Reckless Jack: Hey no worries.
Jay Williams: What could you offer to my friend over here?
Marsha ponders the question.
Marsha: I can offer him the love of Jesus...
Reckless Jack: NEXT, NEXT, NEXT, NEXT, NEXT!
Marsha: But... what?
Reckless Jack: Baby, I like to fuck on the first date... so yeah, you aren't in the running.
Marsha: But you don't know me!
Jay Williams: Marsha, GET THE FUCK OUT!
Some music plays as she starts to cry and leave. Reckless Jack shakes his head.
Reckless Jack: Jesus freaks suck but not really suck.
Jay Williams: No shit.
Amy Skye Williams: You should have treated her better. I thought she was nice and friendly. Not some dumb whore.
Reckless Jack: Yeah, you'd know about being a whore...
Jay slaps his forehead as Amy glares at Jack while eating her chips. Jay looks over the next piece of paper.
Jay Williams: Alright, next woman is named... Lucy? Wow, how odd is that? Says here she likes to be double penetrated... the hell? Is this a joke entry?
No it's not as Lucy walks through the door.
Reckless Jack: WHAT THE FUCK, NO, NO NONO NONONONONONONNONONONONONO!
Jay Williams: Uh oh...
Amy Skye Williams: Hahahahahahahaha, this outta be good... that fucker Jack will get what's coming to him.
Jay Williams: And apparently, she was came on too.
She sits down on the chair.
Jay Williams: So uh...
Reckless Jack: No, you leave now, get the fuck outta here Lucy.
Lucy: But I still love you! Sure I cheated on you with your best friend, got an abortion of your child and divorced you but I still love you! I'll suck you now!
Reckless Jack: Security, get this whore out of here!
Security comes in and takes Lucy out of here, kicking and screaming.
Amy Skye Williams: I found her to look like a porn star.
Jay Williams: Hey Jack, wasn't she in a porn?
Reckless Jack: ...Yes, while we were married...
Amy Skye Williams: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, YOU MARRIED A WHORE, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Reckless Jack stands up.
Reckless Jack: Okay, we are done for now, fuck this. I need a beer.
He leaves as Jay and Amy stay, looking at the sheets.