Post by Jonny Fly on Dec 20, 2011 13:42:11 GMT -5
Jonny Fly is seen on the screen. He’s wearing a black button down shirt tucked into his gray suit slacks. He stands next to a painter’s easel with a smirk on his face. On the easel sits a large white paper flip chart. The chart is about two feet tall and one foot wide. Fly begins speaking.
JF: Today we are going to recap the top five reasons our old friend Aaron Miles is no longer with us. Let’s start from the bottom.
Fly moves toward the easel, grabs the first piece of blank paper and rips it off. The next sheet of paper in large black writing reads:
#5: His love of ladders
Fly explains.
This guy intended to combat his coming fate by introducing…a ladder. It’s bad enough that he didn’t have a shot of standing up to me in the ring, but then he wanted to give me toys!? What a fucking idiot! As I stand here today, I’m pretty damn certain Aaron Miles is never going to want to see a ladder again in his life…if he’s even alive..
..have we ever got confirmation he’s still alive?
Fly shrugs his shoulders and rips off the piece of paper from the chart.
#4: Seth Lerch
Our fearless leader told me that he felt safe putting Aaron Miles in the ring with me before our match at One. I explained to him the possible consequences of that, and he blew me off. Since he didn’t listen, I felt a show and tell would make my message clear. That motherfucker should have been locked in a cage with armed security until our match at One. Now Seth has to scramble to find a suitable replacement and with the urging of some dumb fuck settled on Kaylyn James Evans. I don’t know you call that, but it’s not great leadership.
Fly rips off number four from the chart and exposes the next item on the list.
#3: His costing Jonny Fly a shot at the Hardcore Title at One.
Let’s face it; those other six wrestlers in that Royal Rumble two weeks ago couldn’t beat me. If Miles wasn’t in that ring I would be wrestling for the Hardcore Title and Television Title at One. That means, in two weeks, I would hold two of the three championship belts in the WCF. That’s not something that goes without punishment.
Fly flips to the next page.
#2: He was AARON MILES
I’m pretty sure we don’t need to expand on this one much. He’s Aaron Miles. That’s the fucking punch line. My god, can you believe this guy was actually winning matches here? Do any of you here have any self-respect?
Fly shakes his head in disgust and flips the page. In huge black, bolded letters, we see the number one reason Aaron Miles is a ghost.
#1: ME
That one is pretty obvious, isn’t it? Let Aaron Miles’ fate be a lesson to you all. This is the impending era of Jonny Fly. I..am..taking..over. You’ve watched me win all of my matches, you’ve watched me destroy Aaron Miles, and in two weeks you’ll watch me throw Kaylyn James Evans around like a bitch Frisbee.
Brace yourselves.
…oh, and in true Aaron Miles fashion, and in remembrance of his mediocrity, please be sure to ‘like’ this message.
Fly smirks and the scene fades.
JF: Today we are going to recap the top five reasons our old friend Aaron Miles is no longer with us. Let’s start from the bottom.
Fly moves toward the easel, grabs the first piece of blank paper and rips it off. The next sheet of paper in large black writing reads:
#5: His love of ladders
Fly explains.
This guy intended to combat his coming fate by introducing…a ladder. It’s bad enough that he didn’t have a shot of standing up to me in the ring, but then he wanted to give me toys!? What a fucking idiot! As I stand here today, I’m pretty damn certain Aaron Miles is never going to want to see a ladder again in his life…if he’s even alive..
..have we ever got confirmation he’s still alive?
Fly shrugs his shoulders and rips off the piece of paper from the chart.
#4: Seth Lerch
Our fearless leader told me that he felt safe putting Aaron Miles in the ring with me before our match at One. I explained to him the possible consequences of that, and he blew me off. Since he didn’t listen, I felt a show and tell would make my message clear. That motherfucker should have been locked in a cage with armed security until our match at One. Now Seth has to scramble to find a suitable replacement and with the urging of some dumb fuck settled on Kaylyn James Evans. I don’t know you call that, but it’s not great leadership.
Fly rips off number four from the chart and exposes the next item on the list.
#3: His costing Jonny Fly a shot at the Hardcore Title at One.
Let’s face it; those other six wrestlers in that Royal Rumble two weeks ago couldn’t beat me. If Miles wasn’t in that ring I would be wrestling for the Hardcore Title and Television Title at One. That means, in two weeks, I would hold two of the three championship belts in the WCF. That’s not something that goes without punishment.
Fly flips to the next page.
#2: He was AARON MILES
I’m pretty sure we don’t need to expand on this one much. He’s Aaron Miles. That’s the fucking punch line. My god, can you believe this guy was actually winning matches here? Do any of you here have any self-respect?
Fly shakes his head in disgust and flips the page. In huge black, bolded letters, we see the number one reason Aaron Miles is a ghost.
#1: ME
That one is pretty obvious, isn’t it? Let Aaron Miles’ fate be a lesson to you all. This is the impending era of Jonny Fly. I..am..taking..over. You’ve watched me win all of my matches, you’ve watched me destroy Aaron Miles, and in two weeks you’ll watch me throw Kaylyn James Evans around like a bitch Frisbee.
Brace yourselves.
…oh, and in true Aaron Miles fashion, and in remembrance of his mediocrity, please be sure to ‘like’ this message.
Fly smirks and the scene fades.