Post by Eccentrix on Jul 29, 2017 16:22:17 GMT -5
Incomparable Talk: “Breaking Bastard” with guest Troy Wilson
(The scene opens with Trey Carter, wearing a clean all white suit, sitting behind a desk in a studio. It is heavily decorated with Trey Carter Memorabilia and his name is literally everywhere on set. He gives the camera a sly smile)
Trey Carter: Hello and welcome to the first edition of Incomparable Talk. I’m your host The Incomparable Trey Carter! Now for those of you that have been living under a rock hiding from the inevitable Armageddon and haven’t heard of me…the name again is Trey Carter. Former Alpha champion, which I won my first month in the company. Constant threat for John Rabid’s television title. The one true number one contender for the World title…they just haven’t announced it yet. And of course, THE BEST TECHNICAL WRESTLER IN THE WORLD!
Whether you agree with me or not, any of my detractors or skeptics have to know for a fact that I am lightyears ahead of my time. But when you introduce such a massively popular trendsetter like me, you’re bound to get fakes and copies coming out of the woodworks. One such wrestling fake is The Magnificent Bastard Marty Barrett. Yes you heard me right, that is his actual name. No wonder he calls himself “Bastard”, he’ll do anything to take the attention from his first name “Marty”. Nothing quite strikes fear like when you hear “Marty”. When you have a pansy first name, you hide that shit! What the hell is wrong with you, fam? How could you walk into a room and expect to instill fear in people’s hearts with the same name as the kid from Back to the Future? You are about his height and build though. And you can’t seem to stop shaking in my presence… Did you catch that? Because the guy who played Marty McFly has parkin….never mind.
I am in all-out war mode here. I deserve to be top tier and yet I’m overlooked once again. People like “Marty” are getting a free ride while true talent like myself have yet to get a one on one shot at a title. The last time I got my one on one for a title, I won! So the powers that be are scared of me. They’re scared that I’m gonna rip through all their little poster children and expose them for the weak individuals that they are. All the promoting you do for them just to find out they aren’t worth half the ticket prices these fans are forced to pay to see them. I want to set the record straight and make sure everyone knows the truth about what’s going on around here. Then you’ll understand why I do deserve to be on the top of every ranking and polling and I should have had my world title shot long ago.
Again, welcome to the first edition of Incomparable Talk. Today’s guest is newcomer Troy Wilson. He’ll be here to give a little bit of insight of Marty Barrett, as he was the last to face him in the ring. The musical guest is myself, freestyling about my opponent. Let’s start this off with a comparison between the competitors, ladies and gentlemen it’s the Tale of the Tape.
(A giant “Tale of the Tape” graphic appears on screen)
TALE OF THE TAPE
The Overrated Bastard Marty Who-Gives-A-Shit
Height: 5’10” (Seriously? His face comes to most people’s balls. But that’s probably how he got the match…)
Weight: 228 lbs (wait, he’s shorter AND fatter than me?)
Hometown: Ogden, Utah (Mormons scare me…)
Skill Set: None
Finisher: Ineffective as hell
Interesting Fact: Spit and Swallows
The Incomparable Trey Carter
Height: 6’5”
Weight: 220 lbs
Hometown: Anaheim, CA
Skill Set: Best technical wrestler in the world
Finisher: THE KNOX!!!
Interesting Fact: Champion in first month with company! Bad ass entrance music! Future Hall of famer!
Trey Carter: As you can clearly see, I beat this guy in pretty much every category. Aside from the spitting and swallowing of course. That’s no competition there… Now as promised, I like to put together a freestyle for my opponents before I take their ass down in a match. It took me a while to put this together, because I had to research this Marty guy and I stopped caring after the first fifteen minutes. But I managed to fight the need to sleep on the guy and bring you a freestyle diss for Marty Barrett…
(Trey Carter stands up from behind the desk and steps in front of a green screen. A stage hand gives him a bandana, which he immediately ties over his head, and sunglasses. He poses for the camera for a few seconds before a random instrumental plays)
Tha Carter Freestyle!!! “Beating The Bastard”
Unhhhh, yeeeeeahh, what…what….what
I like to call this freestyle, Beating the Bastard….check it….
Marty Barrett
Hardly a marquee, no merit
His personality, I’ll bear it
But his leg’s perforated, I’ll tear it
Bomb his ass like a terrorist
Break his wrists, now he can’t carry shit
DDT, his ego took the whole hit
Knox! His head split, how’s he magnificent?
Nothing impressive in his move list
Just kicks, bro do you even lift?
You’re a rambling Mormon, multiple wife having, glorified cruiserweight
Nobody’s gambling on you winning, you look horrified to walk the plank
“The Beholder” I aint sold bro, I’ll beat you with your own submission fool
Take you to E.R. and help you heal, just to beat and readmit you
You got issues, couldn’t beat John Rabid, now you mid card status
I’ll beat you so far into oblivion, they can’t find you on the Atlas
I’m a technician and a tactician, the way you perceive yourself is fiction kid
Everybody hates that “This Is Your Life!” Like the segment Alexa Bliss did
You’re smaller than me, ain’t a baller like me, bottom to my top shelf
Why don’t you make like Vince said Bret did and go “screw yourself”…
Live Interview With Troy Wilson
(The camera goes back to Trey Carter who’s sitting behind his desk again. He has a huge self-satisfied smile on his face before he
begins speaking again)
Trey Carter: That was damn good. You’re welcome! Now we move on to tonight’s interview. Troy Wilson was cool enough to agree to come down and talk shop about The Bastard. As you may know, they had a match not too long ago. I’m gonna pick his brain a little bit and find out more about my next victim.
(“Not Afraid” by Eminem plays and Troy Wilson walks onto the set. Him and Trey shake hands and sit down on their respective
chairs)
Trey Carter: How are you doing brotha?
Troy Wilson: I'm doing pretty good brodie.
Trey Carter: There is a lot of black star power in the room right now. We definitely need to take over this company man, the lack of us in power is embarrassing. But that’s a conversation for another day… Listen, I've fought against The Bastard before and let me tell you, I didn't see any talent or skill there. He actually cost me winning the Television title by getting in the way of me and John Rabid. My question to you is, how was your experience fighting this guy?
Troy Wilson: Yeah man it was a rough experience for my debut match at the WCF. He's not really mentally stable if you catch my drift and he taught me what to expect from wrestlers with his mindset. He came at me exactly how I predicted, utilizing some sort of underhanded tactic or making sure that his girl would get involved to save him from getting his ass beat. He's a little too arrogant, and he couldn't pull off that easy win that he wanted.
Trey Carter: Now I'm completely convinced that this man shoots laxative up his asshole, cuz with all that shit he's talking he clearly has the runs coming out the wrong end. Is there anything he said to you that rubbed you the wrong way when you two last fought Or any message you have for him now?
Troy Wilson: It's not what he said that really rubbed me the wrong way but it was what he did. He had the audacity to harass the innocent people of Brooklyn just to prove in his sick mind that I'm "retarded". All I have to say to Marty is that the next time we meet in the ring, we'll finish our unhandled business.
Trey Carter: Thank you for coming on the show, any last advice for me in taking on this self-obsessed jackass Marty Barrett?
Troy Wilson: Be ready for some weird shit, and please slap up his bitch outside the ring too.
Trey Carter: Any one wrestler out there you want to personally put on notice?
Troy Wilson: Sidney J. Warwick. The Golden Boy's coming!
Trey Carter: Thanks again for dropping by, we’ll keep the show rolling after this commercial break….
New “Magnificent Bastard” Inspired Merchandise
(The scene opens with two friends standing in the mall, Jimmy and Stewart. Jimmy has long blonde hair, good looks, and is extremely fit. His friend Stewart is three hundred pounds, smells horrible, and his gut is constantly slipping out from under his shirt like it’s playing “peek-a-boo” with the passers-by. Jimmy looks stressed out)
Jimmy: Dude this sucks.
Stewart: Hey what’s wrong friend.
Jimmy: I’m just so tired of all these hot chicks hitting on me. It’s getting bad. This hot model said she would do me in any position I wanted and give me the best orgasm I’ve ever had. I’m so depressed. I just wish I could be uglier, in worst shape and less talented than you Stewart.
Stewart: You can be!
Jimmy: What?!
Stewart: Hey if you want to be fat and ugly just like me, you should try “Farty Marty!”
Jimmy: What’s that?
Stewart: “Farty Marty” is the newest sensation. It’s a drink that you take. After one cup, my coordination went down, I was much less appealing, and my personal hygiene has never been worse! Watch this…
(A hot brunette walks by and Stewart smiles at her, which causes her to vomit all over her shirt. She runs off screaming. The two high five)
Stewart: Now you try!
(A sexy blonde walks into the scene and heads right towards Jimmy)
Sexy Blonde: Mmm… you like you could use a hug baby. I hug with my legs…around your waist…with my vagina…
(Jimmy smiles at Stewart and grabs the drink off camera. He downs it and immediately turns into the Marty Barrett look-alike)
Sexy Blonde: Ewwwwwwww!!!!
(The blonde projectile vomits all over Jimmy and runs off)
Sexy Blonde: You fuckin Farty Marties!!!!
(Jimmy and Stewart give a cheesy accomplished smile to the camera as it fades to black)
Fan Service
(Trey Carter smiles at the camera as once again he is in front of the green screen. The background shows random tweets and messages about Trey rolling past)
Trey Carter: Before we end the show I do want to take the time to answer a few questions.
Smellmyfinger242: “Sorry to hear about your father being murdered, that’s rough. My dad was too. Hang in there and I’m sure everything will be alright 😊”
Trey Carter: Thanks for those kind words but I’m glad my father’s dead and since you didn’t actually ask a question and more or less made a statement to draw sympathy or relate to me; I’m glad yours is dead too… Next!
Ren&stimpy3859: “You lost the Alpha title almost immediately after you won it, and you lost your title matches for both the Television and Hardcore title. What’s the dizzle?”
Trey Carter: Fuck you!! I was robbed all three of those times, you idiot prick!! This company is biased and that’s why I haven’t had a proper fight for a title. There’s always multiple people in it and interference or something. I swear something is going to happen to change all that. This racism, if that’s what it is, needs to stop. I’m the best technical wrestler in the world so that’s the only damn explanation. Last one, this is much more of a stressful segment than I thought…
Trumpfor2ndterm: "Your career up to this point has been lackluster. Anything you plan to do to change that?"
Trey Carter: (smiling) Well after I make short work of Marty, I have a surprise for you and every single wrestler on the roster. Stay tuned…
(The scene opens with Trey Carter, wearing a clean all white suit, sitting behind a desk in a studio. It is heavily decorated with Trey Carter Memorabilia and his name is literally everywhere on set. He gives the camera a sly smile)
Trey Carter: Hello and welcome to the first edition of Incomparable Talk. I’m your host The Incomparable Trey Carter! Now for those of you that have been living under a rock hiding from the inevitable Armageddon and haven’t heard of me…the name again is Trey Carter. Former Alpha champion, which I won my first month in the company. Constant threat for John Rabid’s television title. The one true number one contender for the World title…they just haven’t announced it yet. And of course, THE BEST TECHNICAL WRESTLER IN THE WORLD!
Whether you agree with me or not, any of my detractors or skeptics have to know for a fact that I am lightyears ahead of my time. But when you introduce such a massively popular trendsetter like me, you’re bound to get fakes and copies coming out of the woodworks. One such wrestling fake is The Magnificent Bastard Marty Barrett. Yes you heard me right, that is his actual name. No wonder he calls himself “Bastard”, he’ll do anything to take the attention from his first name “Marty”. Nothing quite strikes fear like when you hear “Marty”. When you have a pansy first name, you hide that shit! What the hell is wrong with you, fam? How could you walk into a room and expect to instill fear in people’s hearts with the same name as the kid from Back to the Future? You are about his height and build though. And you can’t seem to stop shaking in my presence… Did you catch that? Because the guy who played Marty McFly has parkin….never mind.
I am in all-out war mode here. I deserve to be top tier and yet I’m overlooked once again. People like “Marty” are getting a free ride while true talent like myself have yet to get a one on one shot at a title. The last time I got my one on one for a title, I won! So the powers that be are scared of me. They’re scared that I’m gonna rip through all their little poster children and expose them for the weak individuals that they are. All the promoting you do for them just to find out they aren’t worth half the ticket prices these fans are forced to pay to see them. I want to set the record straight and make sure everyone knows the truth about what’s going on around here. Then you’ll understand why I do deserve to be on the top of every ranking and polling and I should have had my world title shot long ago.
Again, welcome to the first edition of Incomparable Talk. Today’s guest is newcomer Troy Wilson. He’ll be here to give a little bit of insight of Marty Barrett, as he was the last to face him in the ring. The musical guest is myself, freestyling about my opponent. Let’s start this off with a comparison between the competitors, ladies and gentlemen it’s the Tale of the Tape.
(A giant “Tale of the Tape” graphic appears on screen)
TALE OF THE TAPE
The Overrated Bastard Marty Who-Gives-A-Shit
Height: 5’10” (Seriously? His face comes to most people’s balls. But that’s probably how he got the match…)
Weight: 228 lbs (wait, he’s shorter AND fatter than me?)
Hometown: Ogden, Utah (Mormons scare me…)
Skill Set: None
Finisher: Ineffective as hell
Interesting Fact: Spit and Swallows
The Incomparable Trey Carter
Height: 6’5”
Weight: 220 lbs
Hometown: Anaheim, CA
Skill Set: Best technical wrestler in the world
Finisher: THE KNOX!!!
Interesting Fact: Champion in first month with company! Bad ass entrance music! Future Hall of famer!
Trey Carter: As you can clearly see, I beat this guy in pretty much every category. Aside from the spitting and swallowing of course. That’s no competition there… Now as promised, I like to put together a freestyle for my opponents before I take their ass down in a match. It took me a while to put this together, because I had to research this Marty guy and I stopped caring after the first fifteen minutes. But I managed to fight the need to sleep on the guy and bring you a freestyle diss for Marty Barrett…
(Trey Carter stands up from behind the desk and steps in front of a green screen. A stage hand gives him a bandana, which he immediately ties over his head, and sunglasses. He poses for the camera for a few seconds before a random instrumental plays)
Tha Carter Freestyle!!! “Beating The Bastard”
Unhhhh, yeeeeeahh, what…what….what
I like to call this freestyle, Beating the Bastard….check it….
Marty Barrett
Hardly a marquee, no merit
His personality, I’ll bear it
But his leg’s perforated, I’ll tear it
Bomb his ass like a terrorist
Break his wrists, now he can’t carry shit
DDT, his ego took the whole hit
Knox! His head split, how’s he magnificent?
Nothing impressive in his move list
Just kicks, bro do you even lift?
You’re a rambling Mormon, multiple wife having, glorified cruiserweight
Nobody’s gambling on you winning, you look horrified to walk the plank
“The Beholder” I aint sold bro, I’ll beat you with your own submission fool
Take you to E.R. and help you heal, just to beat and readmit you
You got issues, couldn’t beat John Rabid, now you mid card status
I’ll beat you so far into oblivion, they can’t find you on the Atlas
I’m a technician and a tactician, the way you perceive yourself is fiction kid
Everybody hates that “This Is Your Life!” Like the segment Alexa Bliss did
You’re smaller than me, ain’t a baller like me, bottom to my top shelf
Why don’t you make like Vince said Bret did and go “screw yourself”…
Live Interview With Troy Wilson
(The camera goes back to Trey Carter who’s sitting behind his desk again. He has a huge self-satisfied smile on his face before he
begins speaking again)
Trey Carter: That was damn good. You’re welcome! Now we move on to tonight’s interview. Troy Wilson was cool enough to agree to come down and talk shop about The Bastard. As you may know, they had a match not too long ago. I’m gonna pick his brain a little bit and find out more about my next victim.
(“Not Afraid” by Eminem plays and Troy Wilson walks onto the set. Him and Trey shake hands and sit down on their respective
chairs)
Trey Carter: How are you doing brotha?
Troy Wilson: I'm doing pretty good brodie.
Trey Carter: There is a lot of black star power in the room right now. We definitely need to take over this company man, the lack of us in power is embarrassing. But that’s a conversation for another day… Listen, I've fought against The Bastard before and let me tell you, I didn't see any talent or skill there. He actually cost me winning the Television title by getting in the way of me and John Rabid. My question to you is, how was your experience fighting this guy?
Troy Wilson: Yeah man it was a rough experience for my debut match at the WCF. He's not really mentally stable if you catch my drift and he taught me what to expect from wrestlers with his mindset. He came at me exactly how I predicted, utilizing some sort of underhanded tactic or making sure that his girl would get involved to save him from getting his ass beat. He's a little too arrogant, and he couldn't pull off that easy win that he wanted.
Trey Carter: Now I'm completely convinced that this man shoots laxative up his asshole, cuz with all that shit he's talking he clearly has the runs coming out the wrong end. Is there anything he said to you that rubbed you the wrong way when you two last fought Or any message you have for him now?
Troy Wilson: It's not what he said that really rubbed me the wrong way but it was what he did. He had the audacity to harass the innocent people of Brooklyn just to prove in his sick mind that I'm "retarded". All I have to say to Marty is that the next time we meet in the ring, we'll finish our unhandled business.
Trey Carter: Thank you for coming on the show, any last advice for me in taking on this self-obsessed jackass Marty Barrett?
Troy Wilson: Be ready for some weird shit, and please slap up his bitch outside the ring too.
Trey Carter: Any one wrestler out there you want to personally put on notice?
Troy Wilson: Sidney J. Warwick. The Golden Boy's coming!
Trey Carter: Thanks again for dropping by, we’ll keep the show rolling after this commercial break….
New “Magnificent Bastard” Inspired Merchandise
(The scene opens with two friends standing in the mall, Jimmy and Stewart. Jimmy has long blonde hair, good looks, and is extremely fit. His friend Stewart is three hundred pounds, smells horrible, and his gut is constantly slipping out from under his shirt like it’s playing “peek-a-boo” with the passers-by. Jimmy looks stressed out)
Jimmy: Dude this sucks.
Stewart: Hey what’s wrong friend.
Jimmy: I’m just so tired of all these hot chicks hitting on me. It’s getting bad. This hot model said she would do me in any position I wanted and give me the best orgasm I’ve ever had. I’m so depressed. I just wish I could be uglier, in worst shape and less talented than you Stewart.
Stewart: You can be!
Jimmy: What?!
Stewart: Hey if you want to be fat and ugly just like me, you should try “Farty Marty!”
Jimmy: What’s that?
Stewart: “Farty Marty” is the newest sensation. It’s a drink that you take. After one cup, my coordination went down, I was much less appealing, and my personal hygiene has never been worse! Watch this…
(A hot brunette walks by and Stewart smiles at her, which causes her to vomit all over her shirt. She runs off screaming. The two high five)
Stewart: Now you try!
(A sexy blonde walks into the scene and heads right towards Jimmy)
Sexy Blonde: Mmm… you like you could use a hug baby. I hug with my legs…around your waist…with my vagina…
(Jimmy smiles at Stewart and grabs the drink off camera. He downs it and immediately turns into the Marty Barrett look-alike)
Sexy Blonde: Ewwwwwwww!!!!
(The blonde projectile vomits all over Jimmy and runs off)
Sexy Blonde: You fuckin Farty Marties!!!!
(Jimmy and Stewart give a cheesy accomplished smile to the camera as it fades to black)
Fan Service
(Trey Carter smiles at the camera as once again he is in front of the green screen. The background shows random tweets and messages about Trey rolling past)
Trey Carter: Before we end the show I do want to take the time to answer a few questions.
Smellmyfinger242: “Sorry to hear about your father being murdered, that’s rough. My dad was too. Hang in there and I’m sure everything will be alright 😊”
Trey Carter: Thanks for those kind words but I’m glad my father’s dead and since you didn’t actually ask a question and more or less made a statement to draw sympathy or relate to me; I’m glad yours is dead too… Next!
Ren&stimpy3859: “You lost the Alpha title almost immediately after you won it, and you lost your title matches for both the Television and Hardcore title. What’s the dizzle?”
Trey Carter: Fuck you!! I was robbed all three of those times, you idiot prick!! This company is biased and that’s why I haven’t had a proper fight for a title. There’s always multiple people in it and interference or something. I swear something is going to happen to change all that. This racism, if that’s what it is, needs to stop. I’m the best technical wrestler in the world so that’s the only damn explanation. Last one, this is much more of a stressful segment than I thought…
Trumpfor2ndterm: "Your career up to this point has been lackluster. Anything you plan to do to change that?"
Trey Carter: (smiling) Well after I make short work of Marty, I have a surprise for you and every single wrestler on the roster. Stay tuned…