Post by Lilith on Jan 14, 2017 20:14:38 GMT -5
Monday, January 9th, 2017
Liliths Thoughts, 2:10 PM
After not even needing to recover from any wounds, with an easy, not remotely tiring victory over, who they told her was the current Internet Champion, Lilith was feeling completely over joyed. In only a couple of weeks from now, she’d once again become the Internet Champion, as regardless who held it, no one would ever be a greater Internet Champion/contender/troll than Lilith, not even Dag "Applejack" Riddik. She’d definitely left a lasting impression on the current champion, following her tag match with him and her effort to lul Dag into a false sense of security had gone well. He was so easily manipulatable. He was such a weak man, certaintly no way near as strong as Lilith... mentally nor physically.
Trying to reel Dag "Applejack" Riddik in over the past week was an incredibly hilarious feat. Of course she never "needed" him, not in any way. All she needed was for the fire in herself to be properly ignited, which of course it always was. Lilith knew there were obstacles trying to hold her back, but she just found this extremely funny knowing full well they never could, they wouldn't even come close to stopping or even delaying her in any way. She had just destroyed the "Internet Champion" and the man who thought she cared about him, the look on his face when he realized who she really was still made her laugh. She could have done that any moment of course, to crush those weaklings in the palm of her hand, but sometimes you just had to wait for the right moment to fully enjoy such a thing. Nothing could have made her laugh more than watching the pain on Teddy Blazes face as she destroyed him on those steel ring steps... and to watch Kidd Krazzys heart literally shatter because of her and her actions... that was truly the icing on the cake.
Lilith smiled wickedly to herself as she thought about how Dag had been ALLOWED to pick up the victory in their match, the fact he actually believed he had genuinely done so by himself just filled her heart with joy. Dag was like a toddler sitting on Liliths lap as she drove her car, although she was letting him hold onto the steering wheel, she was still very much in charge of the vehicle. And how Dag didn't realize this, she did not know. Nothing he did, nothing, not even taking the internet championship from Teddy was done without her being completely aware of it and allowing him to do so. She sure hoped he was keeping the title nice and warm for her, because after she won it again she knew he would never so much as catch a glimpse of it again.
Lilith burst out laughing the moment she saw that she was once again booked in a tag match with Dag as her tag team partner, the mere thought of it just sent satisfying tingles through her body. This was EXACTLY what she wanted and she was once again getting her way.
Lilith: Hahahahahahaha I'm tagging with that retarded pony fucker AGAIN?! That is freaking hilarious! When I asked Seth to book this match I thought he'd say no, realizing that I was trolling "The International Champion"... but then maybe not. Maybe Seth LIKES me toying with Applejack... oh this is going to be FUN!!! And we're going up against who? The returning Adam Young?! The guy who's so fucking stupid not even death itself wanted him! But then... maybe good old AY isnt THAT bad... I mean he DID beat Joey Flash... a fact I still use to this day to rub in his ugly fucking face!
Lilith shook her head as she started to laugh.
Lilith: Dag Riddik… AGAIN! Fucking hilarious! At this point I'm really running out of things I could do to this guy. I mean last week i even took him to fucking Ponycon for crying out loud. You'd have really really thought he'd have figured it out by now! But then this guy is a fucking moron, I mean he thinks he can mold me. ME!!! He thinks I'm a follower, a sponge… he thinks he can fill my pretty little head with his ideals and god only knows what else! Honestly, I just feel sorry for this guy. I really do… if only he knew the truth…
Friday, January 13th, 2017
Marriott Hotel, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
After checking herself into one of the most luxurious hotels she could find, with Dags credit card which she had stolen from him earlier in the night, Lilith made herself comfortable on her small standard double size hotel beds. Dag didn't know it but Lilith had booked three rooms, the one the two of them were in now, another for Dag and the luxury penthouse which she intended to keep a secret, not because she felt ashamed or embarrassed by placing it onto Dags card, but because she knew that if Dag did find out he would be furious and Lilith would just love every moment of his adorable little anger fit.
She had successfully managed to smuggle several puppies into the room, hiding them in her bra, as one of the puppies bounced up and sat down on her stomach as she spread out on the bed. She wondered how Dag was getting on with his dog who she had also managed to smuggle into the room, he unfortunately was too big to fit in her bra and so Lilith had spent a short while disguising the dog placing sunglasses on it and a nice hat, she couldn't help but wonder whether or not the receptionist just thought that it was nothing more than someone's furry grandmother. All that mattered was, it worked.
Lilith: Hey Applejack…
Dag snapped his neck and torso around from facing his new dog, Baldur, to confront Lilith. He pointed angrily right at Lilith’s big mouth
Dag: I’m going to try this one more time. Stop. Calling. Me. Applejack.
Lilith looked up from her phone as she continued to play with her puppy. Dag seemed angry for some reason but she had no idea why. He was probably sad because there was no mini fridge in the room, she knew she was.
Lilith: What are you talking about now? I was talking to my puppy! I named him Applejack…
Lilith smiled sweetly at Dag who seemed to relax as she told him this, again she had no idea why.
Lilith: ...after his Daddy. His full name is Applejack Riddik Junior… ISNT IT CUTE?!!
Lilith smiled big at Dag completely satisfied with how she had become such a good mother in such a short period of time and had named her baby something so cute.
Dag: You are a hopeless case, Lilith. I have very little patience, and you’re pushing it. Now why the hell are we here, and why did we have to bring these damn dogs? Baldur is too big for a tiny hotel room like this!
Lilith sighed as she looked over at Dag who was clearly very uncomfortable being in the room with her and she knew exactly why that was as she nodded her head slowly.
Lilith: I knew it, I knew you'd have been unhappy in here. I swear I totally asked the girl downstairs if she had an outdoor room, maybe even a stables for you… but she just looked at me like I was crazy. This room IS too small for a pony such as yourself, you wanna get outta here? Maybe go to a nice restaurant? I'm pretty sure one of these places around here serves carrots…
Dag heaved himself up from the bed as Baldur cocked his head to the side, excited to see what his owner was up to. He stood straight up and turned around to face Lilith, looking down at her with authority. He pointed his finger right in her face and scowled deeply as he prepared to assert himself once and for all.
Dag: Lilith, you listen to me here and now! I’m so sick of being made a fool of by you and your sister! She may as well still be alive, there’s no difference between you two. Both of you are incapable of recognizing reality even when it punches you in the face with brass knuckles! I shouldn’t need to stand here and tell you I’m not a fucking horse, Lilith, yet still you call me a stupid name. You know what? I don’t need a goddamn win over Adam Young and his skinhead friend. I have established myself in this company, and I won’t allow you to turn me into a joke!
At this point Dag was yelling right in Lilith’s face as his veins popped and he turned red with frustration.
Dag: You need me, Lilith, not the other way around! I demand respect from you if you’re going to keep begging me to team with you against menial opponents like Kidd Krazzy and Adam Young. I am a grown man who could snap your neck in a heartbeat and never think twice about it. I may live by Germanic Law, but I can choose to ignore it just for a minute it if I so choose. You will start by calling me Dagvald, or at least Dag for fuck’s sake, or I’m leaving. Do you understand me so far?
Dag was still breathing heavily right in Liliths face as he finished his adorable little rant, Lilith couldn't help but worry that he was on the verge of having a heart attack what with him being so old and all. She paused to think about what she should say at this moment to try and calm him down but the fact she hadn't paid attention to anything he had just said made that very hard for her. Well, she had paid attention to one thing he said, and she knew it was something Dag had said in passing without much thought but Lilith wanted… no, needed to know more. Lilith looked up at the silver haired man with her big golden eyes and for the first time in over two weeks it was in a sincere way, something which shocked even her.
Lilith: Ummmmmmm, Dag?
Dag was a bit surprised that it seemed he may have gotten through the concrete bunker thick skull of the childish girl sitting in front of him. Those eyes, deep as brandy wine as usual, seemed inquisitive and honest.
Dag: “Dag…” That’s a good start, Lilith. What are you trying to ask me?
Lilith once again paused with a confused look on her face, generally speaking when Lilith looked like this she was thinking of something funny or sarcastic to say, but her emotions continued to be genuine as she searched for the words she needed to say.
Lilith: You said that you were angry at me AND my sister….. you know I don't have any family, right? Logan was the closest thing I had to a father figure and… well, I don't know where he is right now but that doesn't change the fact that I don't have anyone… especially not a sister…
Dag: What are you talking about? What’s your last name?
Lilith paused trying to think of a good answer, she didn't have one.
Lilith: I…. ummmmm… I don't have one. Well… I mean I guess at one point I did… but I don't remember what it was…
Dag: What are you babbling about? Your last name is Phoenix, Lilith, just like Katherine Phoenix, your sister. She was exactly like you. She’s supposed to be dead, but her death took place in WCF, and I’ve learned those can very easily mean nothing. I’m just glad I’ve never had to deal with both of you at the same time. Anyway, I don’t have time to sort out your amnesia, intentional blocking out of traumatic family events, or whatever the hell. Do you understand that from now on, you’ll treat me with the respect I deserve?
Lilith stared at Dag, starred for far too long and then when Dag thought that she was finally done and was about to say something, she starred some more. Her eyes turned dry and her eyelid began to twitch for several moments before she finally blinked, keeping her eyes closed for a short while. Out of nowhere she shot up from the bed, with her puppy under her arm as if nothing had ever happened.
Lilith: I'm hungry! You want to get some ice cream? Let's get some ice cream! I want ice cream! Let's go!
Lilith stood up straight and slowly walked over towards the door, stopping in her tracks before she reached it. Once again Lilith stood dead still for several minutes before shaking her head and reaching out to grab the door handle.
Lilith: Ice cream time!
Dag shook his head, disappointed.
Dag: Absolutely fucking not. What did I just say? You need to take these things seriously. I’m only traveling with you because I’m freeloading the shit off of you. I’m not here to be your buddy you get ice cream with. But fuck it, if you won’t listen to me, maybe you need some time for it to sink in. If you want ice cream so bad, go get some yourself. I’ll wait here with these fucking dogs you insisted on bringing along.
Lilith wasn't listening, clearly not in a good state of mind. She pulled down the door handle and exited the room leaving Dag behind who immediately sighed and stretched out on the bed. He was a tad concerned he’d said something he shouldn’t have about her sister Katherine. But how could he know she would deny her own sister’s existence? He figured it shouldn’t surprise him though. It was the kind of loony nonsense she always did.
He took the opportunity to relax and enjoy a moment’s respite from her lunacy. The puppies were busy wrestling on the bed while Baldur watched with amusement. For a big Norwegian Elkhound to be so relaxed in such a small room, Dag patted himself on the back for his training ability. He knew he had to get him some exercise soon though. He began to think about the benefits of traveling with Lilith instead of driving his GAZ cross country. The money, the time, the effort, sure, but being stuck with Lilith was beginning to drive him insane. He may have wanted to do all he could to facilitate society’s collapse, but whether or not it was worth it was beginning to be called into question.
He bent over the side of the bed and patted Baldur on his head. It had taken a good bit of mental preparation before he felt he was ready for another dog following the brutal burning death of Bernadette when he was just a child. For the longest time, he couldn’t bring himself to love another dog, just like he couldn’t love another woman the way he loved Isabella. For such a cruel, sadistic, inhuman, evil man, he sure put a lot of stock into loyalty. He thought he might have loved Robyn, had he more time to get to know her. Sadly for both of them, their paths were separated shortly after the defense of his estate.
The guerrilla organization figured Dag didn’t need a partner after that, and they were assigned to different missions. After the Kalmarists were cracked down on by the UN anti-terrorist forces, Dag split back to the states and rededicated himself to traditional European values. Baldur has been easy to bond with so far, maybe too easy. Dag was still afraid to become too deeply connected to anything or anyone he could have ripped away from him. Of course, it would be next to impossible not to love that dog.
He was four years old, fully mature and grown, but still rambunctious, playful, and friendly. Bernadette had been much more calm and caring, but she had been nine years old at the time. She had probably been just the same when she was a young dog. Maybe even someone as crazy as Lilith could grow to become a calm, mature individual. She certainly seemed to have the mind of a puppy, always running around hyperactivity and thinking she could get the best of anything, no matter the odds stacked against her. This could just as easily have been attributed to being recklessness as it could being courageous or energetic.
Dag and Lilith were polar opposites in many ways, not the least of which being his cold, calculated manner clashing with her brazenness and impulsivity. In a way, no matter how much he may have denied it, that certainly played into their working so well together. Being around her outside the ring for more than three consecutive seconds may have been the equivalent of a complete shutdown of all mental faculties, but in the ring, he could strategize the constantly changing environment of the match while she kept their opponents busy and distracted. Of course, she wasn’t to be underestimated of her own merit, either.
He’d seen her deliver some brutal and punishing blows and grapples. He considered himself lucky in never having to face her sister, though he came close on several occasions. He remembered when she’d try to screw him out of a win against Lucious Starr, but he impressed her so much it led to his inclusion in the Family- for better or for worse. Regardless of how that played out at the time, it certainly prepared him for working with Lilith, which for some ungodly reason Seth has decided is what he wants him to do. With one win under their belts and even the accolade of “wrestlers of the week,” he had to admit it was doing well for his career so far, but before he had time to think about it any further Lilith burst through the bedroom door, almost causing the door to blast directly off its hinges.
The brunettes mouth was covered in what appeared to be the remains of a pink, most likely strawberry ice cream and in her hands she was carrying what looked like nothing more than a wooden box. Lilith immediately threw the box down fairly hard on top of Dag, knocking the wind right of out him and jumped up onto the bed sitting down next to her tag team partner with panic on her face as he continued to try and catch his breath.
Lilith: Oh my god. Oh my god! OH MY GOD!!! We were doing it all wrong! WE WERE APPROACHING IT ALL WRONG!!! I didn't believe it when I saw it… but it was right there! RIGHT THERE!!! I mean I've heard of gimmick changes but this is just INSANE!!!
Lilith looked at Dag who was still gasping for air after being winded by Lilith moments ago. She seemed confused by this as she picked the box off of his lap and laid it down on the bed in front of her.
Lilith: What's wrong with you? You were really that shocked by it or…
Dag coughed and stuttered for a second before catching his breath.
Dag: Damn, Lilith, what the hell is going on? What is in that fucking thing you threw at me?
At first Lilith didn't answer, all she did is reach into her bra, pull out her phone and play around on it for a few seconds before throwing it directly into Dags face.
Lilith: Read that, Applejack! You won't believe it!
Dag was about to smack Lilith for calling him that stupid name, but he caught a glimpse of the webpage pulled up on Lilith’s phone he had narrowly caught before it nailed him in the eye. He read over it with annoyance.
Dag: Adam Young dead… typical WCF bullshit. Who hasn’t died in this company? Is this why you’re freaking out Lilith? Shit, you probably believe Adam Young is a zombie now, don’t you? God damned fake news again.
Lilith wasn't paying attention to Dag as usual as her face slowly turned white with fear, she quickly looked around the room before trying her hardest to cuddle up into Dag, who didn’t offer much resistance to the busty brunette.
Lilith: HES DEAD!!! A ghost! He's probably watching us right now! You don't understand what's going on right now, Applejack?! We're under attack by ghosts only the Ghostbusters aren't real people so we can't even call them for help!!!
Lilith crawled up the bed and sat directly on top of Dag, hiding her face in his shoulder.
Lilith: I don't want to fight ghosts, Applejack! Look at me! Do I look like a Ghostbuster to you?! I don't even have a cool lazer box thinggy!
Dag really wasn’t sure what to make of this, but he wasn’t against Lilith crawling around on top of him. He knew she was just being too stupid to realize what she was doing though. He just shook his head at her sheer ignorance.
Dag: No, Lilith, despite the liberal media’s attempts last year, you don’t look like a Ghostbuster. You’re far too pretty compared to those monstrosities. Anyway, I assure you, Adam Young isn’t really dead. I just told you earlier, people die in WCF all the time…
Lilith gasped at Dag and put her hand over his mouth stopping him from saying anything else, he really wasn't helping matters. Lilith ripped up the bed sheets and got inside the bed and pulled the covers over her head trying to hide from the scary ghosts who were no doubt perving on her just like normal humans usually did.
Lilith: Adam Young is a ghost, WCF is full of ghosts, there are ghosts in my bedroom… HOW DO I KNOW YOU'RE NOT A GHOST?!! I saw that movie with the guy from that Christmas movie! He looked like a normal guy too until the very end! AND HE WAS A GHOST!!! I don't want to see dead people, Applejack… that is way way way way WAY too scary!
Lilith closed her eyes tight wondering whether or not Dag would vanish as she told him she didn't want to see dead people. She slowly lifted up her hand and placed it onto his face, he was definitely still there.
Lilith: Okay I don't think you're a ghost but you can never be too careful!
Dag shoved her clammy hand out of his eye socket with agitation.
Dag: Of course I’m not a bloody ghost, Lilith. There is no such thing as ghosts. I could get into paganism, but it would mean as little to you as it does that bullshit imposter Odin. Listen to me, Lilith, get a hold of yourself and stop acting like a child. I won’t let you undo all the preparations I’ve done to get you ready for our match this Sunday for fuck’s sake!
Lilith lifted up the bedsheets to give Dag evil looks.
Lilith: Oh yeah? Ghosts aren't real, huh?! HUH?! Well how do you explain Adam Young?! How do you explain everyone else who has died in the WCF?! How do you explain Slimer?! AND HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS?!!
Lilith pointed to the box which was still on the bed.
Lilith: It's literally a toy to talk to dead people, Applejack! ALSO KNOWN AS GHOSTS!!! Nope nope nope nope nope!!! I'm not doing anything until you use it to see if they're friendly or not AND you're sleeping with me tonight! Even if they're friendly ones I don't wanna sleep by myself tonight… not when there are ghosts literally EVERYWHERE!!!
Dag cracked a stupid smile as he laughed to himself.
Dag: I can agree to one of these terms. As for what I’m presuming is the ouija board in that box, that’s a bloody scam, Lilith. You got scammed, and you’re not wasting my time too.
Liliths eyes got even angrier, they were now the sort of eyes a wife would give her husband if she was super annoyed at him… the evil looks were THAT bad.
Lilith: Applejack, I am not going to say it again… Use the ghost talking machine and see if they're friendly! Maybe see if you can contact Adam Young too!
Dag: No, I’m not going to say it again! Stop calling me Applejack or I will leave you here for the ghosts to get you in the middle of the night, all by yourself! That’s step one! Either agree or I’m out!
Lilith paused to think about her options.
Lilith: If I stop calling you your name will you use the toy to see if they're friendly ghosts?
Dag: Will you still need me to sleep with you tonight?
Lilith nodded her head, clearly still terrified about the thought of there being ghosts surrounding her.
Lilith: Mmhmmm, but only if you pinkie pie promise swear on your hometown, Ponyville that you will protect me!
Dag: Gggrrrrr… Yes, Lilith, I’ll protect you from the nonexistent ghosts. I’ll even hold you tight so nothing can get you without going through me. Let’s go with that. Now what the hell do you want me to do with this stupid piece of plastic?
Lilith shook her head.
Lilith: No no no no no! You need to say “I pinkie pie promise swear on my hometown, Ponyville, that I will protect you from the scary ghosts and Adam Young who will no doubt try and rape you in his ghost form like the creepy pervert that he is… or was… before he died”. I know I should be able to take your word for it without the pinkie pie promise but you can't break those! They're super special promises!
Dag: How about I promise you that if you feel like you’re being raped it’s only your imagination manifesting your fears and it’s definitely not real?
Lilith gave Dag such evils that she even managed to scare herself a little bit.
Lilith: PINKIE PIE PROMISE THAT STUFF… NOW!!!
Dag held up his pinky finger, laughing too hard at what he just said to care anymore.
Dag: I pinky promise, Lilith, now let’s just get this over with, please!
Lilith nodded, finally happy that she got Dag to do what she wanted… kind of. She pushed back the covers and opened the box, laying the board down onto the bed and putting the little circle thing in the middle of the board.
Lilith: Okay so what do we do now? Also… I should have mentioned this earlier but I hope you know how to spell because I don't so I won't have a clue what the ghosts are saying!
Dag wasn’t surprised Lilith had bought something she didn’t even know how to use, or really, couldn’t have used if she did, apparently. How she was constantly on the internet boards if she couldn’t spell or read was another thing entirely. He easily formulated a plan.
Dag: Oh, sure thing Lily, don’t worry that pretty little head of yours. I’ll handle this, you just put your hand on this wooden pointer thing and I’ll take care of the rest.
Lilith placed her hand onto the pointer, scared that as soon as she did it’d give her some kind of shock or a ghost would be able to possess her body or something. Luckily, nothing happened. She exhaled before looking at Dag.
Lilith: Okay, now what?
Dag: You ask if there are any ghosts present in the room, Lilith. If there are, they’ll use their ghostly powers to force the pointer to the “yes” letters. You ask, because I refuse to make myself look like a gullible retard.
Lilith: Ummmmmmm… okay.
Lilith took a deep breath before beginning.
Lilith: Ummmmmm hi, my name is Lilith but if you're a nice friendly ghost you can call me Lilo. I was just wondering if there are any ghosts in here? And if so do you think my boobs look good in this top?
Lilith looked at Dag who couldn't help but look down at Liliths cleavage after what she just said, she wasn't aware of what he was doing though as she was now fully focusing on the little pointer. After a few seconds it slowly began moving towards the small word which said “yes”. Lilith gasped and once again turned around to hide her face in Dags shoulder.
Lilith: THERE ARE GHOSTS IN HERE!!! This is way way way too scary!!!
Dag sniggered to himself. Of course he was the one pulling the dial. This was going to be too easy, and much too fun.
Dag: It’s okay, Lilith, if they had wanted to do something, they would have by now. Why don’t we start with a simple question to put your mind at ease? I’ll ask it: Are you a friendly ghost or a mean ghost?
The marker slowly slid to the left, then abruptly changed direction and slid right to NO.
Lilith jumped back, wrapped her arms so tightly around Dags neck that it was a wonder his face didn't turn blue and began to whimper into his shoulder.
Lilith: I don't like this anymore, Dag! You told me they would be friendly!
Dag: I didn’t say that, I just said they either didn’t want to or couldn’t do anything to hurt us. I think we should at least ask it what its name is and why it hasn’t done anything to us if it’s supposed to be such a hostile spirit.
Dag cleared his throat and closed his eyes in a melodramatic fashion.
Dag: Spirit! What is your name?
The marker glided easily between the letters A, D, A, M, Y, O, U, N, and G.
Lilith really didn't want to know what the board was saying anymore as she continued to cuddle into Dag, she watched the pointer move out of the corner of her eye but had no idea what it said, the whole experience was terrifying her and she just knew that she'd now have nightmares for weeks after this.
Lilith: Ummmmm… do I even want to know what it said?
Dag: Haha, you won’t believe this, Lilith. It’s Adam bloody Young! Don’t you feel good to know we’ve got him so worried about his match this Sunday that he’s trying to follow us around and find out our strategy? How pathetic! He’s always been one to try and get a dirty advantage knowing he can’t win any matches on his own or on clean terms. Oh, there’s a good question: When’s the last time you won a match, Ghost Adam?
The marker slid quickly to get through the letters needed to spell out “SOMETIME IN AUGUST I THINK.” Dag burst out laughing at his handiwork.
Dag: See! Nothing to worry about! This moron hasn’t won a match in forever, and here you are worrying about him haunting us!
Lilith: But but but … what if there are other ghosts here too? They may not be as completely fucking useless as Adam Young!
Dag: There aren’t, Lilith, I assure you, or they would have said something when we asked who was in here. Now speaking of Adam being completely fucking useless, why don’t we ask him why he hasn’t done anything to us?
Dag asks the question and moves the slider around to spell out “I’M AFRAID YOU COULD EVEN KICK MY ASS IN GHOST FORM.” Dag giggles at his handiwork and looks for Lilith’s reaction.
Lilith watched the pointer move around from letter to letter and then finally looked back up at Dag, annoyed.
Lilith: You're cheating! You're so moving that thing around! Adam Young would NEVER be smart enough to spell out that many words! He's even more stupid than I am when it comes to spelling and… other general every day life things! Take your hand off the pointer! Imma do this properly!
Dag: No, no, I swear, this is the real deal! Well, okay, I’ll be honest. I can feel where the pointer is going and I can easily tell what he’s trying to say, so to make it easier for you I’m trying to help him spell it right so I can tell you what it says. Just trust me, Lilith, I would never lie to you. Don’t you trust me?
Lilith shook her head.
Lilith: No! Now Imma do ask the questions! No more helping the ghosts! I gots to see what kind of perverts I am dealing with in here! I'll know when you're pushing it around, Applejack!
Lilith felt Dag relax his arm, now was her turn to ask the questions.
Lilith: Hi, Lilith again. I'm sorry about before … my friend here is just a little bit of a jerk sometimes is all he doesn't mean to be offensive or stuffs. Now… are there any ghosts in here who ARENT Adam Young?
Lilith paid close attention to Dags arm to make sure he wasn't pushing it as the pointer headed over towards the “yes” again. Lilith gasped but she felt much more courageous this time.
Lilith: Okay. Ummmmm… how do you feel about My Little Pony, Kpop and anime? Do you love it just as much as my friend here? His name is Dag by the way but he loves that stuff so much he changed his name to Applejack, I think it's super cute. Do you love that stuff too? Will we be friends?
Dag growled at Lilith again and shoved the slider to the edge of the board.
Dag: Okay, stop fucking with me. You’re doing this on purpose now. Ask the ghost pertinent questions, like why he’s hanging around Adam Young when we all know Adam has no friends. Go on.
Lilith: But… I wanted to know if he loved that stuff just as much as you first! You can't just go straight in being a jerk to people, Applejack! You big time jerk you!
Lilith gave Dag major evil looks again.
Dag: Stop giving me those stupid eyes already. It’s not being a jerk to ask it why it’s giving Adam Young the time of day or how it’s able to tolerate being in the same room as him for more than five seconds. I’m gonna ask the questions again now since you can’t take this seriously. Who are you?
The pointer moved around and spelled out ADAM YOUNG’S DEAD BROTHER.
Dag: Well that explains a lot. I bet you’re happy you two are reunited in death at least, right?
The slider moved to NO.
Dag: No? Really? Why not?
The slider spelled out, I’M BORED OF KICKING HIS ASS, leading Dag to break into another fit of laughter.
Lilith carefully watched Dag play around with the pointer and saw how much fun he was having doing so, but the more she watched, the more she realized how much of a terrible, boring toy it actually was and she could not help but feel like she wasted Dags hard earned cash on something which was essentially useless. Lilith looked up at Dag who was still finding Adam Young super funny.
Lilith: I'm bored now, I think Imma go sleep in a minute. Oh by the way, you may as well keep that toy, Applejack, you paid for it.
Lilith smiled in Dags face before pushing herself up off his chest and playing with her pillow a bit making it as comfortable as possible.
Dag: What the hell are you talking about? I sure as hell didn’t pay for that waste of money. I sat here staring at the dogs and reflecting on the melancholy of my life while you spilled ice cream on yourself.
Lilith: Ummmmmm yeah… about that… I kinda took some cash out of your wallet whilst you weren't looking. I figured you would want to join me for ice cream but since you didn't… Yayyyyyy ice cream and useless toys on you!
Lilith yawned.
Lilith: Applejack, I'm sleepy. Turn the light out on the way back to your room, okay?
Dag frantically checked his wallet and found he was missing twenty bucks. Fuck it, he figured, she was paying the gas bill.
Dag: What do you mean on the way back to my room? I thought you wanted me to sleep in your bed to protect you from the ghosts?
Lilith turned around to face Dag and gently patted him on his shoulder.
Lilith: Applejack, don't be so retarded. There's no such thing as ghosts. Now stop being such a baby and go back to your own room.
At this point Lilith was finding it really really hard not to burst out laughing and the look on Dags face made it even harder not to do so.
Dag: Fucking hell, Lilith. Fine, I’ll go back to the room I made you pay for. May as well. It’s right next door anyway, so when you have a nervous breakdown from your own sheer stupidity in the middle of the night, feel free to walk over and hopelessly knock on my door while I sleep right through it. I’m a very heavy sleeper.
Dag was clearly still unaware that Lilith had paid for everything with his credit card, once again she had to stop herself from laughing.
Lilith: Don't worry, Applejack. Not a lot scares me. For example if I woke up in the middle of the night and bear blood was all over my walls I’d just find it funny. Goodnight pony lover.
Hearing the bear blood comment turned Dag’s blood cold. Why on Earth would she say such a specific, obscure, and bizarre thing? It wasn't the first time he’d been led to suspect something about this Lilith. He was too annoyed with her to give it much thought at the moment. He stalked out of the room, intentionally forgetting to turn the light off. He set himself up in his room, unzipped his bag, and pulled out the tiny drill he’d brought along just for this occasion.
Liliths Thoughts, 2:10 PM
After not even needing to recover from any wounds, with an easy, not remotely tiring victory over, who they told her was the current Internet Champion, Lilith was feeling completely over joyed. In only a couple of weeks from now, she’d once again become the Internet Champion, as regardless who held it, no one would ever be a greater Internet Champion/contender/troll than Lilith, not even Dag "Applejack" Riddik. She’d definitely left a lasting impression on the current champion, following her tag match with him and her effort to lul Dag into a false sense of security had gone well. He was so easily manipulatable. He was such a weak man, certaintly no way near as strong as Lilith... mentally nor physically.
Trying to reel Dag "Applejack" Riddik in over the past week was an incredibly hilarious feat. Of course she never "needed" him, not in any way. All she needed was for the fire in herself to be properly ignited, which of course it always was. Lilith knew there were obstacles trying to hold her back, but she just found this extremely funny knowing full well they never could, they wouldn't even come close to stopping or even delaying her in any way. She had just destroyed the "Internet Champion" and the man who thought she cared about him, the look on his face when he realized who she really was still made her laugh. She could have done that any moment of course, to crush those weaklings in the palm of her hand, but sometimes you just had to wait for the right moment to fully enjoy such a thing. Nothing could have made her laugh more than watching the pain on Teddy Blazes face as she destroyed him on those steel ring steps... and to watch Kidd Krazzys heart literally shatter because of her and her actions... that was truly the icing on the cake.
Lilith smiled wickedly to herself as she thought about how Dag had been ALLOWED to pick up the victory in their match, the fact he actually believed he had genuinely done so by himself just filled her heart with joy. Dag was like a toddler sitting on Liliths lap as she drove her car, although she was letting him hold onto the steering wheel, she was still very much in charge of the vehicle. And how Dag didn't realize this, she did not know. Nothing he did, nothing, not even taking the internet championship from Teddy was done without her being completely aware of it and allowing him to do so. She sure hoped he was keeping the title nice and warm for her, because after she won it again she knew he would never so much as catch a glimpse of it again.
Lilith burst out laughing the moment she saw that she was once again booked in a tag match with Dag as her tag team partner, the mere thought of it just sent satisfying tingles through her body. This was EXACTLY what she wanted and she was once again getting her way.
Lilith: Hahahahahahaha I'm tagging with that retarded pony fucker AGAIN?! That is freaking hilarious! When I asked Seth to book this match I thought he'd say no, realizing that I was trolling "The International Champion"... but then maybe not. Maybe Seth LIKES me toying with Applejack... oh this is going to be FUN!!! And we're going up against who? The returning Adam Young?! The guy who's so fucking stupid not even death itself wanted him! But then... maybe good old AY isnt THAT bad... I mean he DID beat Joey Flash... a fact I still use to this day to rub in his ugly fucking face!
Lilith shook her head as she started to laugh.
Lilith: Dag Riddik… AGAIN! Fucking hilarious! At this point I'm really running out of things I could do to this guy. I mean last week i even took him to fucking Ponycon for crying out loud. You'd have really really thought he'd have figured it out by now! But then this guy is a fucking moron, I mean he thinks he can mold me. ME!!! He thinks I'm a follower, a sponge… he thinks he can fill my pretty little head with his ideals and god only knows what else! Honestly, I just feel sorry for this guy. I really do… if only he knew the truth…
Friday, January 13th, 2017
Marriott Hotel, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
After checking herself into one of the most luxurious hotels she could find, with Dags credit card which she had stolen from him earlier in the night, Lilith made herself comfortable on her small standard double size hotel beds. Dag didn't know it but Lilith had booked three rooms, the one the two of them were in now, another for Dag and the luxury penthouse which she intended to keep a secret, not because she felt ashamed or embarrassed by placing it onto Dags card, but because she knew that if Dag did find out he would be furious and Lilith would just love every moment of his adorable little anger fit.
She had successfully managed to smuggle several puppies into the room, hiding them in her bra, as one of the puppies bounced up and sat down on her stomach as she spread out on the bed. She wondered how Dag was getting on with his dog who she had also managed to smuggle into the room, he unfortunately was too big to fit in her bra and so Lilith had spent a short while disguising the dog placing sunglasses on it and a nice hat, she couldn't help but wonder whether or not the receptionist just thought that it was nothing more than someone's furry grandmother. All that mattered was, it worked.
Lilith: Hey Applejack…
Dag snapped his neck and torso around from facing his new dog, Baldur, to confront Lilith. He pointed angrily right at Lilith’s big mouth
Dag: I’m going to try this one more time. Stop. Calling. Me. Applejack.
Lilith looked up from her phone as she continued to play with her puppy. Dag seemed angry for some reason but she had no idea why. He was probably sad because there was no mini fridge in the room, she knew she was.
Lilith: What are you talking about now? I was talking to my puppy! I named him Applejack…
Lilith smiled sweetly at Dag who seemed to relax as she told him this, again she had no idea why.
Lilith: ...after his Daddy. His full name is Applejack Riddik Junior… ISNT IT CUTE?!!
Lilith smiled big at Dag completely satisfied with how she had become such a good mother in such a short period of time and had named her baby something so cute.
Dag: You are a hopeless case, Lilith. I have very little patience, and you’re pushing it. Now why the hell are we here, and why did we have to bring these damn dogs? Baldur is too big for a tiny hotel room like this!
Lilith sighed as she looked over at Dag who was clearly very uncomfortable being in the room with her and she knew exactly why that was as she nodded her head slowly.
Lilith: I knew it, I knew you'd have been unhappy in here. I swear I totally asked the girl downstairs if she had an outdoor room, maybe even a stables for you… but she just looked at me like I was crazy. This room IS too small for a pony such as yourself, you wanna get outta here? Maybe go to a nice restaurant? I'm pretty sure one of these places around here serves carrots…
Dag heaved himself up from the bed as Baldur cocked his head to the side, excited to see what his owner was up to. He stood straight up and turned around to face Lilith, looking down at her with authority. He pointed his finger right in her face and scowled deeply as he prepared to assert himself once and for all.
Dag: Lilith, you listen to me here and now! I’m so sick of being made a fool of by you and your sister! She may as well still be alive, there’s no difference between you two. Both of you are incapable of recognizing reality even when it punches you in the face with brass knuckles! I shouldn’t need to stand here and tell you I’m not a fucking horse, Lilith, yet still you call me a stupid name. You know what? I don’t need a goddamn win over Adam Young and his skinhead friend. I have established myself in this company, and I won’t allow you to turn me into a joke!
At this point Dag was yelling right in Lilith’s face as his veins popped and he turned red with frustration.
Dag: You need me, Lilith, not the other way around! I demand respect from you if you’re going to keep begging me to team with you against menial opponents like Kidd Krazzy and Adam Young. I am a grown man who could snap your neck in a heartbeat and never think twice about it. I may live by Germanic Law, but I can choose to ignore it just for a minute it if I so choose. You will start by calling me Dagvald, or at least Dag for fuck’s sake, or I’m leaving. Do you understand me so far?
Dag was still breathing heavily right in Liliths face as he finished his adorable little rant, Lilith couldn't help but worry that he was on the verge of having a heart attack what with him being so old and all. She paused to think about what she should say at this moment to try and calm him down but the fact she hadn't paid attention to anything he had just said made that very hard for her. Well, she had paid attention to one thing he said, and she knew it was something Dag had said in passing without much thought but Lilith wanted… no, needed to know more. Lilith looked up at the silver haired man with her big golden eyes and for the first time in over two weeks it was in a sincere way, something which shocked even her.
Lilith: Ummmmmmm, Dag?
Dag was a bit surprised that it seemed he may have gotten through the concrete bunker thick skull of the childish girl sitting in front of him. Those eyes, deep as brandy wine as usual, seemed inquisitive and honest.
Dag: “Dag…” That’s a good start, Lilith. What are you trying to ask me?
Lilith once again paused with a confused look on her face, generally speaking when Lilith looked like this she was thinking of something funny or sarcastic to say, but her emotions continued to be genuine as she searched for the words she needed to say.
Lilith: You said that you were angry at me AND my sister….. you know I don't have any family, right? Logan was the closest thing I had to a father figure and… well, I don't know where he is right now but that doesn't change the fact that I don't have anyone… especially not a sister…
Dag: What are you talking about? What’s your last name?
Lilith paused trying to think of a good answer, she didn't have one.
Lilith: I…. ummmmm… I don't have one. Well… I mean I guess at one point I did… but I don't remember what it was…
Dag: What are you babbling about? Your last name is Phoenix, Lilith, just like Katherine Phoenix, your sister. She was exactly like you. She’s supposed to be dead, but her death took place in WCF, and I’ve learned those can very easily mean nothing. I’m just glad I’ve never had to deal with both of you at the same time. Anyway, I don’t have time to sort out your amnesia, intentional blocking out of traumatic family events, or whatever the hell. Do you understand that from now on, you’ll treat me with the respect I deserve?
Lilith stared at Dag, starred for far too long and then when Dag thought that she was finally done and was about to say something, she starred some more. Her eyes turned dry and her eyelid began to twitch for several moments before she finally blinked, keeping her eyes closed for a short while. Out of nowhere she shot up from the bed, with her puppy under her arm as if nothing had ever happened.
Lilith: I'm hungry! You want to get some ice cream? Let's get some ice cream! I want ice cream! Let's go!
Lilith stood up straight and slowly walked over towards the door, stopping in her tracks before she reached it. Once again Lilith stood dead still for several minutes before shaking her head and reaching out to grab the door handle.
Lilith: Ice cream time!
Dag shook his head, disappointed.
Dag: Absolutely fucking not. What did I just say? You need to take these things seriously. I’m only traveling with you because I’m freeloading the shit off of you. I’m not here to be your buddy you get ice cream with. But fuck it, if you won’t listen to me, maybe you need some time for it to sink in. If you want ice cream so bad, go get some yourself. I’ll wait here with these fucking dogs you insisted on bringing along.
Lilith wasn't listening, clearly not in a good state of mind. She pulled down the door handle and exited the room leaving Dag behind who immediately sighed and stretched out on the bed. He was a tad concerned he’d said something he shouldn’t have about her sister Katherine. But how could he know she would deny her own sister’s existence? He figured it shouldn’t surprise him though. It was the kind of loony nonsense she always did.
He took the opportunity to relax and enjoy a moment’s respite from her lunacy. The puppies were busy wrestling on the bed while Baldur watched with amusement. For a big Norwegian Elkhound to be so relaxed in such a small room, Dag patted himself on the back for his training ability. He knew he had to get him some exercise soon though. He began to think about the benefits of traveling with Lilith instead of driving his GAZ cross country. The money, the time, the effort, sure, but being stuck with Lilith was beginning to drive him insane. He may have wanted to do all he could to facilitate society’s collapse, but whether or not it was worth it was beginning to be called into question.
He bent over the side of the bed and patted Baldur on his head. It had taken a good bit of mental preparation before he felt he was ready for another dog following the brutal burning death of Bernadette when he was just a child. For the longest time, he couldn’t bring himself to love another dog, just like he couldn’t love another woman the way he loved Isabella. For such a cruel, sadistic, inhuman, evil man, he sure put a lot of stock into loyalty. He thought he might have loved Robyn, had he more time to get to know her. Sadly for both of them, their paths were separated shortly after the defense of his estate.
The guerrilla organization figured Dag didn’t need a partner after that, and they were assigned to different missions. After the Kalmarists were cracked down on by the UN anti-terrorist forces, Dag split back to the states and rededicated himself to traditional European values. Baldur has been easy to bond with so far, maybe too easy. Dag was still afraid to become too deeply connected to anything or anyone he could have ripped away from him. Of course, it would be next to impossible not to love that dog.
He was four years old, fully mature and grown, but still rambunctious, playful, and friendly. Bernadette had been much more calm and caring, but she had been nine years old at the time. She had probably been just the same when she was a young dog. Maybe even someone as crazy as Lilith could grow to become a calm, mature individual. She certainly seemed to have the mind of a puppy, always running around hyperactivity and thinking she could get the best of anything, no matter the odds stacked against her. This could just as easily have been attributed to being recklessness as it could being courageous or energetic.
Dag and Lilith were polar opposites in many ways, not the least of which being his cold, calculated manner clashing with her brazenness and impulsivity. In a way, no matter how much he may have denied it, that certainly played into their working so well together. Being around her outside the ring for more than three consecutive seconds may have been the equivalent of a complete shutdown of all mental faculties, but in the ring, he could strategize the constantly changing environment of the match while she kept their opponents busy and distracted. Of course, she wasn’t to be underestimated of her own merit, either.
He’d seen her deliver some brutal and punishing blows and grapples. He considered himself lucky in never having to face her sister, though he came close on several occasions. He remembered when she’d try to screw him out of a win against Lucious Starr, but he impressed her so much it led to his inclusion in the Family- for better or for worse. Regardless of how that played out at the time, it certainly prepared him for working with Lilith, which for some ungodly reason Seth has decided is what he wants him to do. With one win under their belts and even the accolade of “wrestlers of the week,” he had to admit it was doing well for his career so far, but before he had time to think about it any further Lilith burst through the bedroom door, almost causing the door to blast directly off its hinges.
The brunettes mouth was covered in what appeared to be the remains of a pink, most likely strawberry ice cream and in her hands she was carrying what looked like nothing more than a wooden box. Lilith immediately threw the box down fairly hard on top of Dag, knocking the wind right of out him and jumped up onto the bed sitting down next to her tag team partner with panic on her face as he continued to try and catch his breath.
Lilith: Oh my god. Oh my god! OH MY GOD!!! We were doing it all wrong! WE WERE APPROACHING IT ALL WRONG!!! I didn't believe it when I saw it… but it was right there! RIGHT THERE!!! I mean I've heard of gimmick changes but this is just INSANE!!!
Lilith looked at Dag who was still gasping for air after being winded by Lilith moments ago. She seemed confused by this as she picked the box off of his lap and laid it down on the bed in front of her.
Lilith: What's wrong with you? You were really that shocked by it or…
Dag coughed and stuttered for a second before catching his breath.
Dag: Damn, Lilith, what the hell is going on? What is in that fucking thing you threw at me?
At first Lilith didn't answer, all she did is reach into her bra, pull out her phone and play around on it for a few seconds before throwing it directly into Dags face.
Lilith: Read that, Applejack! You won't believe it!
Dag was about to smack Lilith for calling him that stupid name, but he caught a glimpse of the webpage pulled up on Lilith’s phone he had narrowly caught before it nailed him in the eye. He read over it with annoyance.
Dag: Adam Young dead… typical WCF bullshit. Who hasn’t died in this company? Is this why you’re freaking out Lilith? Shit, you probably believe Adam Young is a zombie now, don’t you? God damned fake news again.
Lilith wasn't paying attention to Dag as usual as her face slowly turned white with fear, she quickly looked around the room before trying her hardest to cuddle up into Dag, who didn’t offer much resistance to the busty brunette.
Lilith: HES DEAD!!! A ghost! He's probably watching us right now! You don't understand what's going on right now, Applejack?! We're under attack by ghosts only the Ghostbusters aren't real people so we can't even call them for help!!!
Lilith crawled up the bed and sat directly on top of Dag, hiding her face in his shoulder.
Lilith: I don't want to fight ghosts, Applejack! Look at me! Do I look like a Ghostbuster to you?! I don't even have a cool lazer box thinggy!
Dag really wasn’t sure what to make of this, but he wasn’t against Lilith crawling around on top of him. He knew she was just being too stupid to realize what she was doing though. He just shook his head at her sheer ignorance.
Dag: No, Lilith, despite the liberal media’s attempts last year, you don’t look like a Ghostbuster. You’re far too pretty compared to those monstrosities. Anyway, I assure you, Adam Young isn’t really dead. I just told you earlier, people die in WCF all the time…
Lilith gasped at Dag and put her hand over his mouth stopping him from saying anything else, he really wasn't helping matters. Lilith ripped up the bed sheets and got inside the bed and pulled the covers over her head trying to hide from the scary ghosts who were no doubt perving on her just like normal humans usually did.
Lilith: Adam Young is a ghost, WCF is full of ghosts, there are ghosts in my bedroom… HOW DO I KNOW YOU'RE NOT A GHOST?!! I saw that movie with the guy from that Christmas movie! He looked like a normal guy too until the very end! AND HE WAS A GHOST!!! I don't want to see dead people, Applejack… that is way way way way WAY too scary!
Lilith closed her eyes tight wondering whether or not Dag would vanish as she told him she didn't want to see dead people. She slowly lifted up her hand and placed it onto his face, he was definitely still there.
Lilith: Okay I don't think you're a ghost but you can never be too careful!
Dag shoved her clammy hand out of his eye socket with agitation.
Dag: Of course I’m not a bloody ghost, Lilith. There is no such thing as ghosts. I could get into paganism, but it would mean as little to you as it does that bullshit imposter Odin. Listen to me, Lilith, get a hold of yourself and stop acting like a child. I won’t let you undo all the preparations I’ve done to get you ready for our match this Sunday for fuck’s sake!
Lilith lifted up the bedsheets to give Dag evil looks.
Lilith: Oh yeah? Ghosts aren't real, huh?! HUH?! Well how do you explain Adam Young?! How do you explain everyone else who has died in the WCF?! How do you explain Slimer?! AND HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS?!!
Lilith pointed to the box which was still on the bed.
Lilith: It's literally a toy to talk to dead people, Applejack! ALSO KNOWN AS GHOSTS!!! Nope nope nope nope nope!!! I'm not doing anything until you use it to see if they're friendly or not AND you're sleeping with me tonight! Even if they're friendly ones I don't wanna sleep by myself tonight… not when there are ghosts literally EVERYWHERE!!!
Dag cracked a stupid smile as he laughed to himself.
Dag: I can agree to one of these terms. As for what I’m presuming is the ouija board in that box, that’s a bloody scam, Lilith. You got scammed, and you’re not wasting my time too.
Liliths eyes got even angrier, they were now the sort of eyes a wife would give her husband if she was super annoyed at him… the evil looks were THAT bad.
Lilith: Applejack, I am not going to say it again… Use the ghost talking machine and see if they're friendly! Maybe see if you can contact Adam Young too!
Dag: No, I’m not going to say it again! Stop calling me Applejack or I will leave you here for the ghosts to get you in the middle of the night, all by yourself! That’s step one! Either agree or I’m out!
Lilith paused to think about her options.
Lilith: If I stop calling you your name will you use the toy to see if they're friendly ghosts?
Dag: Will you still need me to sleep with you tonight?
Lilith nodded her head, clearly still terrified about the thought of there being ghosts surrounding her.
Lilith: Mmhmmm, but only if you pinkie pie promise swear on your hometown, Ponyville that you will protect me!
Dag: Gggrrrrr… Yes, Lilith, I’ll protect you from the nonexistent ghosts. I’ll even hold you tight so nothing can get you without going through me. Let’s go with that. Now what the hell do you want me to do with this stupid piece of plastic?
Lilith shook her head.
Lilith: No no no no no! You need to say “I pinkie pie promise swear on my hometown, Ponyville, that I will protect you from the scary ghosts and Adam Young who will no doubt try and rape you in his ghost form like the creepy pervert that he is… or was… before he died”. I know I should be able to take your word for it without the pinkie pie promise but you can't break those! They're super special promises!
Dag: How about I promise you that if you feel like you’re being raped it’s only your imagination manifesting your fears and it’s definitely not real?
Lilith gave Dag such evils that she even managed to scare herself a little bit.
Lilith: PINKIE PIE PROMISE THAT STUFF… NOW!!!
Dag held up his pinky finger, laughing too hard at what he just said to care anymore.
Dag: I pinky promise, Lilith, now let’s just get this over with, please!
Lilith nodded, finally happy that she got Dag to do what she wanted… kind of. She pushed back the covers and opened the box, laying the board down onto the bed and putting the little circle thing in the middle of the board.
Lilith: Okay so what do we do now? Also… I should have mentioned this earlier but I hope you know how to spell because I don't so I won't have a clue what the ghosts are saying!
Dag wasn’t surprised Lilith had bought something she didn’t even know how to use, or really, couldn’t have used if she did, apparently. How she was constantly on the internet boards if she couldn’t spell or read was another thing entirely. He easily formulated a plan.
Dag: Oh, sure thing Lily, don’t worry that pretty little head of yours. I’ll handle this, you just put your hand on this wooden pointer thing and I’ll take care of the rest.
Lilith placed her hand onto the pointer, scared that as soon as she did it’d give her some kind of shock or a ghost would be able to possess her body or something. Luckily, nothing happened. She exhaled before looking at Dag.
Lilith: Okay, now what?
Dag: You ask if there are any ghosts present in the room, Lilith. If there are, they’ll use their ghostly powers to force the pointer to the “yes” letters. You ask, because I refuse to make myself look like a gullible retard.
Lilith: Ummmmmmm… okay.
Lilith took a deep breath before beginning.
Lilith: Ummmmmm hi, my name is Lilith but if you're a nice friendly ghost you can call me Lilo. I was just wondering if there are any ghosts in here? And if so do you think my boobs look good in this top?
Lilith looked at Dag who couldn't help but look down at Liliths cleavage after what she just said, she wasn't aware of what he was doing though as she was now fully focusing on the little pointer. After a few seconds it slowly began moving towards the small word which said “yes”. Lilith gasped and once again turned around to hide her face in Dags shoulder.
Lilith: THERE ARE GHOSTS IN HERE!!! This is way way way too scary!!!
Dag sniggered to himself. Of course he was the one pulling the dial. This was going to be too easy, and much too fun.
Dag: It’s okay, Lilith, if they had wanted to do something, they would have by now. Why don’t we start with a simple question to put your mind at ease? I’ll ask it: Are you a friendly ghost or a mean ghost?
The marker slowly slid to the left, then abruptly changed direction and slid right to NO.
Lilith jumped back, wrapped her arms so tightly around Dags neck that it was a wonder his face didn't turn blue and began to whimper into his shoulder.
Lilith: I don't like this anymore, Dag! You told me they would be friendly!
Dag: I didn’t say that, I just said they either didn’t want to or couldn’t do anything to hurt us. I think we should at least ask it what its name is and why it hasn’t done anything to us if it’s supposed to be such a hostile spirit.
Dag cleared his throat and closed his eyes in a melodramatic fashion.
Dag: Spirit! What is your name?
The marker glided easily between the letters A, D, A, M, Y, O, U, N, and G.
Lilith really didn't want to know what the board was saying anymore as she continued to cuddle into Dag, she watched the pointer move out of the corner of her eye but had no idea what it said, the whole experience was terrifying her and she just knew that she'd now have nightmares for weeks after this.
Lilith: Ummmmm… do I even want to know what it said?
Dag: Haha, you won’t believe this, Lilith. It’s Adam bloody Young! Don’t you feel good to know we’ve got him so worried about his match this Sunday that he’s trying to follow us around and find out our strategy? How pathetic! He’s always been one to try and get a dirty advantage knowing he can’t win any matches on his own or on clean terms. Oh, there’s a good question: When’s the last time you won a match, Ghost Adam?
The marker slid quickly to get through the letters needed to spell out “SOMETIME IN AUGUST I THINK.” Dag burst out laughing at his handiwork.
Dag: See! Nothing to worry about! This moron hasn’t won a match in forever, and here you are worrying about him haunting us!
Lilith: But but but … what if there are other ghosts here too? They may not be as completely fucking useless as Adam Young!
Dag: There aren’t, Lilith, I assure you, or they would have said something when we asked who was in here. Now speaking of Adam being completely fucking useless, why don’t we ask him why he hasn’t done anything to us?
Dag asks the question and moves the slider around to spell out “I’M AFRAID YOU COULD EVEN KICK MY ASS IN GHOST FORM.” Dag giggles at his handiwork and looks for Lilith’s reaction.
Lilith watched the pointer move around from letter to letter and then finally looked back up at Dag, annoyed.
Lilith: You're cheating! You're so moving that thing around! Adam Young would NEVER be smart enough to spell out that many words! He's even more stupid than I am when it comes to spelling and… other general every day life things! Take your hand off the pointer! Imma do this properly!
Dag: No, no, I swear, this is the real deal! Well, okay, I’ll be honest. I can feel where the pointer is going and I can easily tell what he’s trying to say, so to make it easier for you I’m trying to help him spell it right so I can tell you what it says. Just trust me, Lilith, I would never lie to you. Don’t you trust me?
Lilith shook her head.
Lilith: No! Now Imma do ask the questions! No more helping the ghosts! I gots to see what kind of perverts I am dealing with in here! I'll know when you're pushing it around, Applejack!
Lilith felt Dag relax his arm, now was her turn to ask the questions.
Lilith: Hi, Lilith again. I'm sorry about before … my friend here is just a little bit of a jerk sometimes is all he doesn't mean to be offensive or stuffs. Now… are there any ghosts in here who ARENT Adam Young?
Lilith paid close attention to Dags arm to make sure he wasn't pushing it as the pointer headed over towards the “yes” again. Lilith gasped but she felt much more courageous this time.
Lilith: Okay. Ummmmm… how do you feel about My Little Pony, Kpop and anime? Do you love it just as much as my friend here? His name is Dag by the way but he loves that stuff so much he changed his name to Applejack, I think it's super cute. Do you love that stuff too? Will we be friends?
Dag growled at Lilith again and shoved the slider to the edge of the board.
Dag: Okay, stop fucking with me. You’re doing this on purpose now. Ask the ghost pertinent questions, like why he’s hanging around Adam Young when we all know Adam has no friends. Go on.
Lilith: But… I wanted to know if he loved that stuff just as much as you first! You can't just go straight in being a jerk to people, Applejack! You big time jerk you!
Lilith gave Dag major evil looks again.
Dag: Stop giving me those stupid eyes already. It’s not being a jerk to ask it why it’s giving Adam Young the time of day or how it’s able to tolerate being in the same room as him for more than five seconds. I’m gonna ask the questions again now since you can’t take this seriously. Who are you?
The pointer moved around and spelled out ADAM YOUNG’S DEAD BROTHER.
Dag: Well that explains a lot. I bet you’re happy you two are reunited in death at least, right?
The slider moved to NO.
Dag: No? Really? Why not?
The slider spelled out, I’M BORED OF KICKING HIS ASS, leading Dag to break into another fit of laughter.
Lilith carefully watched Dag play around with the pointer and saw how much fun he was having doing so, but the more she watched, the more she realized how much of a terrible, boring toy it actually was and she could not help but feel like she wasted Dags hard earned cash on something which was essentially useless. Lilith looked up at Dag who was still finding Adam Young super funny.
Lilith: I'm bored now, I think Imma go sleep in a minute. Oh by the way, you may as well keep that toy, Applejack, you paid for it.
Lilith smiled in Dags face before pushing herself up off his chest and playing with her pillow a bit making it as comfortable as possible.
Dag: What the hell are you talking about? I sure as hell didn’t pay for that waste of money. I sat here staring at the dogs and reflecting on the melancholy of my life while you spilled ice cream on yourself.
Lilith: Ummmmmm yeah… about that… I kinda took some cash out of your wallet whilst you weren't looking. I figured you would want to join me for ice cream but since you didn't… Yayyyyyy ice cream and useless toys on you!
Lilith yawned.
Lilith: Applejack, I'm sleepy. Turn the light out on the way back to your room, okay?
Dag frantically checked his wallet and found he was missing twenty bucks. Fuck it, he figured, she was paying the gas bill.
Dag: What do you mean on the way back to my room? I thought you wanted me to sleep in your bed to protect you from the ghosts?
Lilith turned around to face Dag and gently patted him on his shoulder.
Lilith: Applejack, don't be so retarded. There's no such thing as ghosts. Now stop being such a baby and go back to your own room.
At this point Lilith was finding it really really hard not to burst out laughing and the look on Dags face made it even harder not to do so.
Dag: Fucking hell, Lilith. Fine, I’ll go back to the room I made you pay for. May as well. It’s right next door anyway, so when you have a nervous breakdown from your own sheer stupidity in the middle of the night, feel free to walk over and hopelessly knock on my door while I sleep right through it. I’m a very heavy sleeper.
Dag was clearly still unaware that Lilith had paid for everything with his credit card, once again she had to stop herself from laughing.
Lilith: Don't worry, Applejack. Not a lot scares me. For example if I woke up in the middle of the night and bear blood was all over my walls I’d just find it funny. Goodnight pony lover.
Hearing the bear blood comment turned Dag’s blood cold. Why on Earth would she say such a specific, obscure, and bizarre thing? It wasn't the first time he’d been led to suspect something about this Lilith. He was too annoyed with her to give it much thought at the moment. He stalked out of the room, intentionally forgetting to turn the light off. He set himself up in his room, unzipped his bag, and pulled out the tiny drill he’d brought along just for this occasion.