Welcome To Tinseltown II: Let's Take A Closer Look
May 31, 2015 17:02:32 GMT -5
Crow McMorris likes this
Post by Raymond Hatcher on May 31, 2015 17:02:32 GMT -5
***The sun reigns over the skies on a beautiful day in downtown Los Angeles. The light is gleaming off of modern style office buildings, the streets are filled with all kinds of variety of people, from crew-cut guys in business suites walking as fast as they can, just short of breaking into a run while gabbing away on a cellphone pressed so close to their ear it’s a wonder there isn’t a giant brain tumor growing right beneath it, to leather-jacket glad spiked haired ladies with knuckle tattoos and a look that says I’ll stab you right here, right now, but yet still wearing some ridiculously over-priced shoes. You see these people and all kinds in between, the one thing you don’t see is anyone who looks like they make under two hundred grand a year. There’s people making their way by in all manners of transport, flashy sports cars that make an average house seem cheap, to motorscooters, to skateboards, bikes, and rollerblades. One thing you don’t see are the average looking, there’s no beat-up rugged guy in paint-smeared jeans and ripped up t-shirts here. There’s no sign of these types anywhere around. No one here looks like they think about much other than how tight their waist is and how bleached blonde their hair is. One of the individuals we see is Raymond Hatcher, his smile as big as the dreams of all those desperate wannabes that travel to this place of decadence. Hatcher is decked out in his usual wardrobe, an expensive three-piece suit with a light green tie to accentuate it. Hatcher lingers for a moment and then begins to speak.***
Bright and sunny filled with hopes and dreams. Here’s a place where anyone can triumph, from smallest poorest soul, to the biggest and richest, of course your chances a greatly increased in you’re the latter, but see I don’t really mind myself with petty statistics. If every person was too worried that their chances of success were so little that it stopped them from going after the things they want then the chances of success in this world would be zero. That’s a number I’m not too fond of. Sure there’s some instances where it is very much the better way go. Say, zero chances of catching a flesh eating virus, or zero chance of getting molested by a camp counselor. Haha sorry, that turned dark really quick. Sometimes the mind can wander into those dark places without you even noticing.
We’re getting off topic here. The point was I don’t zero. I don’t like the way it looks on a bank account, I don’t like the way in looks on shipping slip, or trans-global business merger with a zero equity stake and low buy-out price. I don’t like it at all. And believe it or not this town is less ampt to those numbers than others. You won’t find a whole bunch of zeros here, dare I be silly and subscribe to the childish routine of rhyming by saying there are no zeros only heroes. Yeah, it was a bad choice, I agree, we won’t do that again.
Well, I’m sure you’re all anxious to know what I’m getting at. Well, keep your shirt on, we have plenty of time. First let’s take a nice walk through West Hollywood. Look at this place, it’s ripe with possibilities. It’s ripe with opportunities. Opportunities to excel, to become more than you could have dreamed. The town that took a tall boy from Kenosha, Wisconsin who had a drunken father and mother that died of an STD into the reknowned director, writer, actor, and producer, Orson Welles. Also the same town that took a boy with a very abusive father and the clunky name Thomas Cruise Mapother IV and turned him into Tom Cruise. Or we could talk about the once homeless living in a van only to become one of the highest paid comedic actors of all time, Jim Carrey.
Okay admittedly that last example wasn’t my particular favorite example, none-the-less my point is made. This is the town where dreams don’t come to die like in New York, no this is a place where real miracles can happen and they happen every day. Everyday a new icon, a new idol travel through under the big printed shadow of those giant gleaming white letters that everyone associates with this town, when they’re not being associated with The Simpsons. Every day the chances are high that you could go from no one to someone with just the right casting, or job offer. You could walk down these streets and meet some of the most talented and gift directors and producers of our time. Whether it be movies, music, or one of the many business elite that grace these streets. It was from this town I was born, it’s from this town I made it big. This place was my golden ticket, success being my chocolate factory and I beat down every Oompa Loompa in my way. I made myself a success in this town, and like they say if you can make here you can make it anywhere. Ok, yes, yes that’s actually New York, but I digress because I like my cities sunny and not prone to terrorist attacks. You won’t see the grey bleakness here that you see on the other side of the country. Now, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy New York, I have an office over there, but there’s nothing like the fresh air of Los Angeles.
***It’s hard to tell if Raymond Hatcher actually believes the ridiculousness of that last line or he’s just trying to force his point through whimsical statements.***
Yes, this is my town, my home by the happenstance of my birth and by my own choice. I have enough wealth to pretty much live wherever I want, but I will always call this my home. Even if I fade away into the great abyss while lounging on Lake Zurich in Switzerland, my final thoughts will be of this town. There is zero chance I would or could possibly be thinking of anywhere else. O zero, you see that? How we came back around to zero. And that brings me to my real point, zero chances, because at Asesinato de Mayo there is zero chance that I won’t walk out of that ring with my hand held high. There is zero chance that I will be beaten by either one of those five…well, I was gonna’ say wrestlers, but I haven’t seen much wrestling acumen from any of them, leaving me to believe maybe they have none. Of course there is also zero chance that I am going to stand here on this beautiful sunny day in this magnificent city and debase the other men in this match. It’s not my style, no, not my style at all. Rather I’m here to enlighten and help. So I’ve decided what a better way to help my opponents then to give them a little insight on my trainer. Now let’s take a magic journey through the power of editing.
***The scene cuts to a gym, it’s a state-of-the-art facility with no less than three rings. It’s clear that this is the best of the best, equipment that looks like it costs more than a Ferrari sprinkle the space. One of the rings is occupied by two boxers take quick shots at each other, but clearly holding something back, some call it sparring. One of the rings is empty and then there is the third ring in which we see none-other-than Raymond Hatcher. Hatcher is no longer in his suit but rather a simple grey t-shirt and a pair of black basketball shorts. Hatcher is standing in a corner, across from him is a guy who is easily several inches taller than Hatcher and maybe forty pounds heavier, all in muscle mass though. Hatcher is stretching a bit in the corner. There’s an older gentleman outside the ring, he looks grizzled and tough, a short stocky little fella with a mean sneer, he starts shouting at Hatcher.***
Come on quit it with your girlie yoga moves I deal with enough of that from my wife. You ready yet?
***Hatcher chuckles a bit at the guy’s assertion. Hatcher steps out of the corner and pronounces.***
Alright let’s go. You ready, Randy?
***We see the big guy nod his head yes and step into the middle of the ring with Hatcher. The two men lock-up in a collar-elbow. Hatcher immediately drops behind Randy into a waist-lock and then lifts Randy up and brings him down face-first to the mat. Hatcher maneuvers around ontop of Randy into a front face-lock. Randy is a fighter though and pushes back up to his feet, Hatcher doesn’t alleviate the face-lock though and is pushed back into a corner by Randy. The old man outside the ring growls.***
Oh, come on let him out of the corner that’s not what we’re here for.
***Randy goes to pull away from Hatcher in the corner, but Hatcher won’t let go of the front face-lock, and then Hatcher whips around and shoves Randy back in the corner and releases the face-lock before nailing Randy with an unbelievably viscous knife-edge chop to the chest. Randy loudly proclaims.***
Holy shit!
***Hatcher then proceeds to start nailing Randy with non-shot forearms and European uppercuts. Randy is taking a real beating and is doing nothing, but covering up to mostly no avail. Hatcher starts shouting at him.***
You wanted me in the corner, huh? Now you’ve got it. You like, huh, you like it?
***The old man outside the ring can’t help, but chime in.***
Raymond, Raymond, come on let ‘im up. Hey! Let ‘im up!
***Randy is now collapses in the bottom of the corner, his forearm thrown over his head in an attempt to protect himself. Raymond Hatcher quits his barrage and step back to the middle of the ring.***
Alright Randy get up and get back out there.
***Hatcher challenges Randy to get up.***
Come on let’s go kid, we don’t have all day.
***Randy a bit disheveled climbs up out of the corner and heads back to the middle of the ring. The two men lock-up again in another collar-elbow tie-up. Randy starts to overpower Hatcher and push him backwards towards the ropes, but Hatcher maneuvers into a hammer-lock. Randy keeps trying to reach around to relieve the pressure on his arm, but Hatcher is holding his ground like a pro. Finally Randy is able to reach back through his legs with his free hand and yank one of Hatcher’s legs out from under him. Hatcher loses his grip and falls back to the mat. Randy spins around, but Hatcher is quick and reaches up hooking Randy’s head and bringing him down into a small package. The old man starts pounding the apron in a count***
One…………………….. Two……………………. Three.
Alright, good move Ray.
***Hatcher releases the move and hops back to his feet. He gives Randy a hand to help him up to his feet. The mean immediately lock-up again and Hatcher switches to a side-headlock and then judo tosses Randy to the mat while still holding the headlock. Randy tries to knip up out of the headlock, but Hatcher has it on tight. Randy eventually gets enough leverage to get back to his feet, Hatcher releases the headlock and nails Randy with a hard European uppercut knocking him back to the ropes, Hatcher charges and nails Randy with a huge clothesline sending Randy over the top rope to the floor. The old man doesn’t hold back.***
Jesus! Ray what in the Hell was the point of that? You need someone to work with and you’re trying to break his damn neck!
***Hatcher looks very dismissingly at the old man over his comment.***
This isn’t even a challenge. What do you want from me? Nevermind this.
***Hatcher walks over the ropes and leans forward on them with his elbows. Hatcher stares into the camera***
I hope you guys are more ready than Big Randy is over there. I hope you guys realize now what you’re getting into. This may be entertainment like all sports are, but this is no show. This is serious business. And no one knows more about business than I do. Understand I won’t take it easy or light on any of you. You need to know now what you’re in for or you end up in a lot worse shape than Randy. See believe it or not I’ve known Big Randy for a while. I like Big Randy, but when you challenge me, you’ll find yourself in a world of trouble. Hopefully this was helpful, hopefully you take my word to heart. Hopefully you’ll survive a ride with me in that ring. Only one way to find out. I’ll see you all at Asesinato de Mayo.
***Hatcher turns back to the middle of the ring.***
Alright get him back in here, I’ll take it easy.
***As Big Randy is seen sliding back into the ring and Hatcher looks poised to attacked the scene fades to black.***
Bright and sunny filled with hopes and dreams. Here’s a place where anyone can triumph, from smallest poorest soul, to the biggest and richest, of course your chances a greatly increased in you’re the latter, but see I don’t really mind myself with petty statistics. If every person was too worried that their chances of success were so little that it stopped them from going after the things they want then the chances of success in this world would be zero. That’s a number I’m not too fond of. Sure there’s some instances where it is very much the better way go. Say, zero chances of catching a flesh eating virus, or zero chance of getting molested by a camp counselor. Haha sorry, that turned dark really quick. Sometimes the mind can wander into those dark places without you even noticing.
We’re getting off topic here. The point was I don’t zero. I don’t like the way it looks on a bank account, I don’t like the way in looks on shipping slip, or trans-global business merger with a zero equity stake and low buy-out price. I don’t like it at all. And believe it or not this town is less ampt to those numbers than others. You won’t find a whole bunch of zeros here, dare I be silly and subscribe to the childish routine of rhyming by saying there are no zeros only heroes. Yeah, it was a bad choice, I agree, we won’t do that again.
Well, I’m sure you’re all anxious to know what I’m getting at. Well, keep your shirt on, we have plenty of time. First let’s take a nice walk through West Hollywood. Look at this place, it’s ripe with possibilities. It’s ripe with opportunities. Opportunities to excel, to become more than you could have dreamed. The town that took a tall boy from Kenosha, Wisconsin who had a drunken father and mother that died of an STD into the reknowned director, writer, actor, and producer, Orson Welles. Also the same town that took a boy with a very abusive father and the clunky name Thomas Cruise Mapother IV and turned him into Tom Cruise. Or we could talk about the once homeless living in a van only to become one of the highest paid comedic actors of all time, Jim Carrey.
Okay admittedly that last example wasn’t my particular favorite example, none-the-less my point is made. This is the town where dreams don’t come to die like in New York, no this is a place where real miracles can happen and they happen every day. Everyday a new icon, a new idol travel through under the big printed shadow of those giant gleaming white letters that everyone associates with this town, when they’re not being associated with The Simpsons. Every day the chances are high that you could go from no one to someone with just the right casting, or job offer. You could walk down these streets and meet some of the most talented and gift directors and producers of our time. Whether it be movies, music, or one of the many business elite that grace these streets. It was from this town I was born, it’s from this town I made it big. This place was my golden ticket, success being my chocolate factory and I beat down every Oompa Loompa in my way. I made myself a success in this town, and like they say if you can make here you can make it anywhere. Ok, yes, yes that’s actually New York, but I digress because I like my cities sunny and not prone to terrorist attacks. You won’t see the grey bleakness here that you see on the other side of the country. Now, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy New York, I have an office over there, but there’s nothing like the fresh air of Los Angeles.
***It’s hard to tell if Raymond Hatcher actually believes the ridiculousness of that last line or he’s just trying to force his point through whimsical statements.***
Yes, this is my town, my home by the happenstance of my birth and by my own choice. I have enough wealth to pretty much live wherever I want, but I will always call this my home. Even if I fade away into the great abyss while lounging on Lake Zurich in Switzerland, my final thoughts will be of this town. There is zero chance I would or could possibly be thinking of anywhere else. O zero, you see that? How we came back around to zero. And that brings me to my real point, zero chances, because at Asesinato de Mayo there is zero chance that I won’t walk out of that ring with my hand held high. There is zero chance that I will be beaten by either one of those five…well, I was gonna’ say wrestlers, but I haven’t seen much wrestling acumen from any of them, leaving me to believe maybe they have none. Of course there is also zero chance that I am going to stand here on this beautiful sunny day in this magnificent city and debase the other men in this match. It’s not my style, no, not my style at all. Rather I’m here to enlighten and help. So I’ve decided what a better way to help my opponents then to give them a little insight on my trainer. Now let’s take a magic journey through the power of editing.
***The scene cuts to a gym, it’s a state-of-the-art facility with no less than three rings. It’s clear that this is the best of the best, equipment that looks like it costs more than a Ferrari sprinkle the space. One of the rings is occupied by two boxers take quick shots at each other, but clearly holding something back, some call it sparring. One of the rings is empty and then there is the third ring in which we see none-other-than Raymond Hatcher. Hatcher is no longer in his suit but rather a simple grey t-shirt and a pair of black basketball shorts. Hatcher is standing in a corner, across from him is a guy who is easily several inches taller than Hatcher and maybe forty pounds heavier, all in muscle mass though. Hatcher is stretching a bit in the corner. There’s an older gentleman outside the ring, he looks grizzled and tough, a short stocky little fella with a mean sneer, he starts shouting at Hatcher.***
Come on quit it with your girlie yoga moves I deal with enough of that from my wife. You ready yet?
***Hatcher chuckles a bit at the guy’s assertion. Hatcher steps out of the corner and pronounces.***
Alright let’s go. You ready, Randy?
***We see the big guy nod his head yes and step into the middle of the ring with Hatcher. The two men lock-up in a collar-elbow. Hatcher immediately drops behind Randy into a waist-lock and then lifts Randy up and brings him down face-first to the mat. Hatcher maneuvers around ontop of Randy into a front face-lock. Randy is a fighter though and pushes back up to his feet, Hatcher doesn’t alleviate the face-lock though and is pushed back into a corner by Randy. The old man outside the ring growls.***
Oh, come on let him out of the corner that’s not what we’re here for.
***Randy goes to pull away from Hatcher in the corner, but Hatcher won’t let go of the front face-lock, and then Hatcher whips around and shoves Randy back in the corner and releases the face-lock before nailing Randy with an unbelievably viscous knife-edge chop to the chest. Randy loudly proclaims.***
Holy shit!
***Hatcher then proceeds to start nailing Randy with non-shot forearms and European uppercuts. Randy is taking a real beating and is doing nothing, but covering up to mostly no avail. Hatcher starts shouting at him.***
You wanted me in the corner, huh? Now you’ve got it. You like, huh, you like it?
***The old man outside the ring can’t help, but chime in.***
Raymond, Raymond, come on let ‘im up. Hey! Let ‘im up!
***Randy is now collapses in the bottom of the corner, his forearm thrown over his head in an attempt to protect himself. Raymond Hatcher quits his barrage and step back to the middle of the ring.***
Alright Randy get up and get back out there.
***Hatcher challenges Randy to get up.***
Come on let’s go kid, we don’t have all day.
***Randy a bit disheveled climbs up out of the corner and heads back to the middle of the ring. The two men lock-up again in another collar-elbow tie-up. Randy starts to overpower Hatcher and push him backwards towards the ropes, but Hatcher maneuvers into a hammer-lock. Randy keeps trying to reach around to relieve the pressure on his arm, but Hatcher is holding his ground like a pro. Finally Randy is able to reach back through his legs with his free hand and yank one of Hatcher’s legs out from under him. Hatcher loses his grip and falls back to the mat. Randy spins around, but Hatcher is quick and reaches up hooking Randy’s head and bringing him down into a small package. The old man starts pounding the apron in a count***
One…………………….. Two……………………. Three.
Alright, good move Ray.
***Hatcher releases the move and hops back to his feet. He gives Randy a hand to help him up to his feet. The mean immediately lock-up again and Hatcher switches to a side-headlock and then judo tosses Randy to the mat while still holding the headlock. Randy tries to knip up out of the headlock, but Hatcher has it on tight. Randy eventually gets enough leverage to get back to his feet, Hatcher releases the headlock and nails Randy with a hard European uppercut knocking him back to the ropes, Hatcher charges and nails Randy with a huge clothesline sending Randy over the top rope to the floor. The old man doesn’t hold back.***
Jesus! Ray what in the Hell was the point of that? You need someone to work with and you’re trying to break his damn neck!
***Hatcher looks very dismissingly at the old man over his comment.***
This isn’t even a challenge. What do you want from me? Nevermind this.
***Hatcher walks over the ropes and leans forward on them with his elbows. Hatcher stares into the camera***
I hope you guys are more ready than Big Randy is over there. I hope you guys realize now what you’re getting into. This may be entertainment like all sports are, but this is no show. This is serious business. And no one knows more about business than I do. Understand I won’t take it easy or light on any of you. You need to know now what you’re in for or you end up in a lot worse shape than Randy. See believe it or not I’ve known Big Randy for a while. I like Big Randy, but when you challenge me, you’ll find yourself in a world of trouble. Hopefully this was helpful, hopefully you take my word to heart. Hopefully you’ll survive a ride with me in that ring. Only one way to find out. I’ll see you all at Asesinato de Mayo.
***Hatcher turns back to the middle of the ring.***
Alright get him back in here, I’ll take it easy.
***As Big Randy is seen sliding back into the ring and Hatcher looks poised to attacked the scene fades to black.***
