The end of my days? The end of the Orbit reign?

[Seifer Black]

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain... To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.

Kevyn Aucoin

I pace backwards and forwards, I can’t sleep this night… I am here in the bathroom listening to Murderdolls on low not to wake anyone up while trying to get my head together with everything that is going on, each time I close my eyes I see the disappointed faces of those that are closest too me standing upon a mountain that seems to be too steep to overcome. Along with the disappointed faces of others I see the faceless drones standing either side of me pushing me backwards and trying to keep me down shouting at me that it is where I belong… I can’t accept this; this is why I cannot sleep… I go and splash water in my face at the sink and as I look up I see a spectral figure behind me with a stern look on his face…

Seifer: Adrian, what are you doing here?

Adrian: Why do you think Seifer?

Seifer: I never know with you.

Adrian: You need to pick yourself back up Seifer, you can’t doubt yourself now, especially at such a crucial moment in your life…

Seifer: I'm not doubting myself…

Adrian: Oh really then why am I here then…

Seifer: I don’t…..

He suddenly starts to laugh for a moment before suddenly slapping me around the face.

Adrian: Don’t you dare say you do not know, you know exactly what I am doing here there is no doubt about that…

Seifer: Why don’t you tell me then so we can get this over with?

Adrian: Where is the fun in that, think about it Seifer, you are in the role of the usurper here they don’t want that do they…

Seifer: I know this Adrian, why are you feeling the need to tell me this now…

Adrian: Because you are not understanding what it really means, the true position you find yourself in.

Seifer: I am the number one contender…

Before I can finish the sentence he slaps me across the face once again…

Adrian: WRONG!! Try again Seifer…

Seifer: I am the numb….

Another slap hits me across the cheek sends me reeling backwards hitting the wall behind me…

Adrian: One more chance Seifer you better get it right this time…

Seifer: I am… I am…

Adrian: Go on Seifer you know the answer to this…

Seifer: I am… The uncrowned champion…

Adrian: There is the answer I wanted to hear, you need to do this Seifer… You can’t have any more distractions… I mean come on Seifer swimming with dolphins what where you thinking…

Seifer: I did that for her, I can’t lose her Adrian…

Adrian: You won’t Seifer you fool, don’t you realise that…

Seifer: I honestly don’t kno…

Before I know it Adrian has picked up the glass from the sink and has smashed it over my head, the glass lacerating my forehead and I feel the blood pouring out onto my face.

Adrian: I told you not to say that again Seifer, I warned you…

Seifer: I know Adrian, I know… I won’t lose her, I need to focus and get the title…

Adrian: Exactly, do this and there will be plenty more time to spend with your family…

He reaches forwards and picks out some small parts of glass out of my hair before he picks up a cloth from the table next to the sink and places it against my head to soak up some of the blood.

Adrian: Be prepared Seifer, this is going to be a war in the truest nature of the word and I will be right there beside you for every step of the way. You need to do this Seifer it is in your nature to do so…You are a killer after all…

Seifer: A killer I may be, but everything I do is for the good of the family I protect…

Adrian: Which is all well and good but why don’t you do something for yourself for once Seifer.

Seifer: I won my chance for the title for myself didn’t I?

Adrian: You say that, Seifer but do you believe it…

Seifer: What is best for one is best for the whole Adrian you should know that.

Adrian: Maybe Seifer… maybe… You need to work through all of this Seifer and see where loyalties truly lie because it can burn you up inside before it does any good.

Suddenly I hear a noise from off in the distance and I snap out of it, blinking Adrian has disappeared and I see clearly around the room once again, the clean tiles of the bathroom reflecting the small light source of my mp3 player… Everything is spinning in my head like some sort of nightmare as the blood drips from my head but there is no fog now and everything becomes clear… Getting up I turn off the mp3 player and get out the bathroom not bothering to even clean myself up as I walk into the bedroom where I get dressed silently without waking up Chelsea, from there I grab a few things including my wallet and a picture of the three of us me Shelley and Chelsea taken at our home in Toronto… A dead weight is piling up again in my chest as I take a pen and paper writing something on it and leaving it on the bedside table… I brush the hair back off her face to take one more look at her before turning on my heel and silently walking out as I think about what I have wrote in the letter…

“ I can clearly see I have been a problem in your life, I can see now that there is only one solution to this… We both need time to clear our heads and I wont stand in your way… Just know I won’t be whole again till I am back here with you…”

Virtue has a veil, vice a mask.

Victor Hugo

As I sit here I think to myself about where I came from and what it took to get here, I sit here backstage at a WCF house show watching a couple of local wrestlers face off in an average match, painfully average if you ask me but the crowd is lapping it up every second as the two of them pander to the crowd more than fighting each other…This is the main event also, I feel sorry for these people having to put up with these poor excuses of wrestlers called Tormenta Roja and Tigre Verde, after the fifth time one of them got up on the turnbuckle to cheer on the crowd I had enough, I walk up to the gorilla position and look at the tech guy.

Techy: Ok sir I get it.

With a few touches on the keyboard I see the lights go out in the arena as the fans scream and shout in anticipation of what may happen until (515) By Slipknot hits the speakers as a collective sound of booo hits my ears, I wait a moment and pick up my black light lamp and switch it on before I pick up a microphone in the other hand and walk out onto the stage just as Babylon AD hits the sound system… I just laugh as I walk down the ramp at the abuse that people are throwing at me, that with a small amount of the crowd chanting my name, clearly there is a few that has seen the light… I have to say it’s comforting to know there is some followers in the arena today… Reaching the ramp I switch off my blacklight lamp and place it on the ground as the lights go back to normal and my music fades as I raise the microphone and look at the wrestlers in the ring who are looking at me with a look of confusion and dread before looking around the arena at the fans.

Seifer: Another day another house show, day by day WCF has been putting on house shows around Mexico to help promote the upcoming pay per view and here is a shock I am not booked at all on any of these cards… I wonder why, maybe it has something to do with the last time I had this microphone in my hand and the blood was shed… Maybe it’s the company thinking that maybe if they keep me distracted with everything else that is available in Mexico City that it will keep the casualty list down to a minimum or maybe just maybe there are people who are scared of what I may do if I am given free rein to do so.

I look back around at the wrestlers in the ring who I can tell is setting their nerves to do something stupid a part of me wants them to stay there in the ring, the other side however is screaming for them to jump.

Seifer: Don’t worry guys I will get to you in a moment don’t worry about that. I want to send a message first…

But before I can finish one of them decided to take a run at the ropes and leaps over them straight at me with a diving cross body, dropping the microphone I catch the Tigre Verde out the air laughing as I pick up his small frame into a military press slamming him back first onto the ring apron with a loud smack making the crowd groan… Still laughing I walk back over to the microphone and pick it up hearing the dark passenger inside roar in pleasure revving my on to do more and more…

Seifer: Ok I like this, a perfect start to a message…

Walking back to Tigre Verde I push him into the ring and climb up onto the ring apron throwing the microphone at Tormenta Roja making him catch it as I leap into a springboard busaiku knee kick sending him flying most of the way across the ring… Nipping back up I pick the microphone back up feeling more and more alive each passing second I am back in a fight.

Seifer: Take notes Orbit… This is going to be a taste of what you have to look forward too at Asesinato del Mayo…

Rolling out of the ring I place the microphone on the ring floor and lift up the ring apron picking out a big long box and moving it to the side before also taking out a table which is covered in barbed wire and setting it up next to the ring… As I do this I feel a blow at my side, not enough to knock me off my feet but it’s still a shock, I turn around and see Tigre Verde going for another kick to my side but I see red and brace for impact and counter it just as it connects to my side before punching him in the face and knocking him over keeping a hold of his leg and grabbing the other one I swing him head first into the barricade knocking him silly. Laughing I look under the ring and see an item there, the dark passenger screams at me too take it and use it so I grab the container from underneath the ring and open it up pouring gasoline onto the barbed wire covered table laughing as I empty it and throw the container to one side and pick the microphone back up.

Seifer: Tick tock, tick tock goes the clock. Counting down Orbits title reign, tick tock…

Putting the microphone back onto the ring floor I take the lighter out of my pocket and light the gasoline on the table setting the table on fire before picking up Tigre Verde for a suplex turning around mid-move and planting him back first with a falcon arrow straight into the fire breaking the table as arena staff dash in with fire extinguishers to put out the fire and get Tigre Verde out of the wire… I watch this for a moment with a big grin on my face before picking up the box and sliding it into the ring before picking up a few cinder blocks and chairs into the ring also before grabbing the microphone and climbing into the ring.

Seifer: I see it all my people, I see the end of an era and the start of another.

Throwing the microphone to one side I run at Tormenta Roja who is getting up in the corner of the ring nailing him with a knee to the jaw which sends him crashing back down to the canvas. Getting back to my feet I walk over and grab the cinder blocks placing them next to each other before putting the unfolded chairs on either side of them. Quickly I look over and see Tormenta Roja get back up to his feet again, laughing he runs at me and I lift up my foot and nail him in his mask covered face making him crumple back to the ground again before I walk to the box opening it up and taking out light tubes laying them across the seats of the chairs suspended over the cinder blocks… Turning around I pick up the man by his head ripping off his mask before grabbing him by his hair and pulling him up back to his feet lifting him up into a suplex position and hitting him with an orange crush bomb onto the tubes with a smash and a thud as he hits the cinder blocks underneath as the fans are now silent in shock… I walk over to the microphone and pick it up still with a smile on my face as the lights go out and a spotlight illuminates the ring.

Seifer: You know what makes me laugh? Each and every time the thought crosses my mind it doesn’t fail to crack me up.

As I say these words I start to laugh again, a maniacal laugh with no warmth.

Seifer: What makes me laugh is someone who is just a fool, the king walking around the kingdom with delusions of grandeur … Even if that king holds the gold they are nothing but a joke in the eyes of the nation and a king in his own eyes only… You see the king does not realise his place and eventually his demise is going to happen as certain as the sun will rise in the morn and set at night. He looks out at the world and overestimates his power and seeing his position as the right to tread on each and every person he sees as underneath him. Orbit, you are the world champion hence the king of this world we live in and I recognise the fact that you earned it to begin with, but with time stronger warriors appear at the gates to challenge for the throne, you say that I should not underestimate you… Well I am not fool enough to do that, I know you will be coming at me with everything you have this Sunday… I understand that you are the champion for a reason but you also said that you consider me “the best of the second rate mother fuckers” with these words are you not underestimating my own strength, you think that because of me not holding any other titles previous in this company that it makes me an unworthy match.

I laugh as I pace around the ring for a moment.

Seifer: You should learn to take your own advice Orbit, you will underestimate me at your own peril and you will lose the gold you covet the most, the gold which gives you the power in our world… Underestimate me and I will take it all from you and I will start a new era…You call me the joke, you send slander my way that I have heard from every pathetic fool that crosses my path, you do not look like a fool but why does half the words that come out of your mouth the words of the fool. You say one thing and then contradict yourself with the next never saying anything that I have not heard before…

I pace a bit more and look out at the fans once again, a sense of happiness filling me up as I look upon the broken body of Tormenta Roja, his blood pouring out onto the ring canvas.

Seifer: Also Orbit you need to get your history straight, I did do well at war but since then I was not given a chance, I stayed in the mid card floating more and more after that performance people praised me for and not getting anywhere… I got sick of it so I decided to take my own fate into my own hands and send a challenge to the so called great and mighty Johnny Fly… Of course when Twilight heard about this she stuck in the stipulation that if I lost the match she would have me fired… I was in between a rock and a hard place at that time, keep on floundering not even in the mid card putting my all into each match to get nothing out of it or do I try to take the head off the snake and make a name for myself while risking it all on a single roll of the dice… I took the chance and I rolled the dice facing Fly and what did the man do, he cheated to beat me with his feet on the ropes during the pin…

I walk around and drop the microphone picking up Tormenta Roja and throwing him over the top rope to the outside, his blood flying through the air in an arc before he hits the ground with a splat as medical staff go to treat him now he was out the ring. Laughing I walk back to the microphone taking a cigarette out of my pocket and lighting it up before picking up the microphone.

Seifer: My career was at its darkest point at that time and I had only one person that believed in me and that was my wife Chelsea, she knew I would be back when I did nothing but doubt… Eventually I came back because of Seth and Eric and I found myself once again floundering in the nothing, seeing others do well around me being given the chances that I yearned for… Then one day Chelsea joined S-Pac and I didn’t know what to think of that, each day she would talk of this great man Scott Savage and how I should talk to him… How he would change my view and help me back to the best I can be… I talked to him and I joined and I have not looked back since, I won the Trilogy cup through one of the toughest matches of my life to gain this chance at the world title and I will not let it all go to waste… I need this all to justify my actions, I need this more and more every day because I crave it, I crave the violence, I crave the blood, I crave the anarchy and I crave the power which comes along with the piece of gold that you hold over your shoulder.

I take another draw of my cigarette flicking a little of the ash onto the canvas.

Seifer: You say I am not what I say, you somehow know everything about me… You see there is certain things everyone says you need to do before you die whether that be sky diving, seeing the pyramids, ride a gondola in Venice and swim with the dolphins… You see Orbit I am the doomsday prophet but I am also a human being, I love my wife with my entire heart and I would do anything for her so I decided that as something for us both to do we would swim with dolphins, you take the piss out of me for this because I want to spend time with my wife outside the constraints of the wrestling world… You dare to judge me for having one person I can confide in just because of what Orbit? You have no one like that do you apart from your disease ridden whores who complained at you for not being able to suck a cock when they wanted too in the back room. You have no right to judge me for my own actions because what you see here is only half of what I am, I am the Doomsday prophet and I am the family man taking care of people I care about the most in my life. You will realise that I am one of the demons that walk the earth and that you should fear me… Fear and realise that I am every bit as good as I say that I am… RECOGNISE THAT! ALSO!… Recognise that I have lost everything that I have in pursuit of this dream, I have lost my family and I will be damned if that sacrifice will be in vain…

I take another draw of my cigarette as I feel the dark passenger roar up into an inferno inside my soul making me feel stronger and stronger, he is clearly happy of tonight’s events.

Seifer: I know you are as good as your word Orbit, I know you have been in some wars in the past and you are more than prepared for another… As am I… I said to you before that I love this environment with all the blood, the pain, the anguish, the broken bones and the crushed souls well this still holds true, I welcome this war that you are wanting to bring to me, I welcome the pain that you are going to bring to me, I welcome the blood that will be shed and the bones that will be broken in this war. I will take all of that gladly with a smile on my face because I know that you will have to kill me to stop me, other great warriors may have said it in the past and no doubt other may in the future but this is the now and in the present in which we live in I say this to you… These words I speak are not an empty promise of cheap words, these words I speak have substance too them and I will bring my fury at you with everything I have to bring you the war you deserve…

I take another draw of my cigarette and throw my head back as I breathe out the smoke. As I tilt my head back down I feel him take over as my eyes turn black.

Seifer: Through light there's darkness, through daylight the night…Through carnage we scream with unfaithful delight… The grasses are burning as trees falling in fright…The limbs they are churning with leaves only a slight… The children are ailing as men's heartbeats are failing with women having seizures and arms all a flailing… With humanity living in fear the whale’s siblings wailing and the moon sheds a tear through darkness we're sailing… Now Orbit don't lie I'll ask with a sigh, does it matter to you if you live or you die? Are you even awake, listen you try you're needed at war now boy don't you cry… Your bones will ache as they try to take fake reasons to live, as their soul moans and quakes as people they know they're all alone so… They try raising boys try helping them grow though it's all just too much… Living life now and such when their family are too far away to touch... it's too hard for sure living life just for the people which you've loved that are slaughtered in their gore while we're out for more…. And just so you know living life is a chore while we're not at war.

I walk into the centre of the ring and sit crossed legged taking another draw of my cigarette, the demon inside telling me I'm just getting started…

Seifer: You see Orbit let me make this plain and clear for you so you can understand… The reason I made this personal to begin with, the reason I have taken it as far as I have is not because of some old grudge from before and it isn’t just the idea of the golden carrot that has been placed in front of everyone’s faces making them strive to become better and better without realising they are doing nothing more or less than running on the eternal hamster wheel, or because there are certain people that are chosen for greatness and there are others who have to scrape for every little bit that they have… It is not because of your actions or anyone else’s… At the end of it all we are all here for one thing, to make a mark on the pages of history and to be able to look back in many years’ time and say to our self and say with pride that we did that… We have achieved something in our lives that is worth fighting the great war for and that is what I want…THIS IS WHAT I NEED TO THAT EVERYTHING HAS A PURPOSE! I need this more than life, I need to win this week at Asesinato del Mayo because it will make the actions that I have taken in the last month justified, I will take the gold from you Orbit if it takes me the last ounce of strength I have in me to do so I will take you down.

I tilt my head back and take another draw of my cigarette before throwing it down on the canvas and putting it out with my hand, laughing again I feel the pain from the burn but I don’t care as I lower my head with a sadistic smile on my face.

Seifer: You make you jokes and laugh when you call me a Marilyn Manson wannabe, calling me a clown who you are going to wipe the floor with… You put me down calling me a dog that does nothing but follow his wife around… You like to talk about the bottom line well this is the true bottom line Orbit… I am something you do not understand and you decide to take the piss and make jokes… You will not completely admit it out loud but I am inside your head, my plans are working and I am making you relive the worst moments of your life in your head and I am driving you insane, when it comes to Sunday you will be charging straight at me and I will make sure you regret it, you will make the mistake and I will end it all in a split second, in that split second your reign will end and when you stare off into the distance realising the end is here. I will take you to the limits of your own humanity and force you to bring out the monster inside, bring out that monster because it’s the only way you are going to be able to beat me… At the end of the day you will be bloody and broken wishing that you never stepped in the ring with me… These are the words of the Doomsday Prophet Seifer Black Armstrong, pay heed to my words or you shall fade to black…

I drop the microphone as my music hits and the lights go out.

I was angry with my friend: I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe: I told it not, my wrath did grow.

William Blake