Post by Deleted on Jul 26, 2009 11:44:15 GMT -5
This advertisement starts out with Mikami in a corner of a WCF ring, wearing his wrestling gear, arms folded. Minor celebrity and recent AT&T spokesman Bill Kurtis walks in from the left.
Bill Kurtis: Professional wrestler Masaya Mikami has some of the fastest moves of anyone wrestling today.
Mikami nods his head.
Bill Kurtis: So I've come to this ring to see who's faster...
Mikami tilts his head and looks quizzically at the former CBS News anchor.
Bill Kurtis: ...on the Internet.
A referee walks in from the right and hands a laptop to Mikami, while Mister Kurtis grabs one from offscreen.
Bill Kurtis: I'll be using the AT&T 3G LaptopConnect card. He won't.
While the host of such shows as Investigative Reports, American Justice, and Cold Case Files explains the features and benefits of this thing that gives you satellite internets or whatever, Mikami frantically types on the keyboard. Eventually, in his trademark crazy-prepared fashion, he pulls a piece of paper from his pocket and places it over the screen. He turns the laptop around just as the pitchman finishes speaking, revealing what looks to be a photocopy of the AT&T homepage. The referee shakes his head and raises Mr. Kurtis' hand.
Referee: The winner, by disqualification!
Bill Kurtis: I'm Bill Kurtis...and I'm faster than Mikami.
Disembodied voice: Switch to the nation's fastest bla bla bla yackity schmakity
Cut to an AT&T boardroom.
Suit: Eh. Nice idea, but I don't think it's different enough from the Floyd Mayweather one. Pass.
: DAMMIT!
All the suits look around in confusion. The one already standing opens a door, revealing Mikami on the other suit holding a cup.
Mikami: I am not that upset, really. The extra exposure would have been nice, though.
Suit: Who let you in here?
Mikami: Oh, it was that nice--
Suit: Just...get out. Please.
Mikami: O.K.
As Mikami leaves, the businessman sits back down in his chair.
Suit: Alright, next commercial.
Bill Kurtis: Professional wrestler Rick Mad is--
Suit: Oh for the love of...PASS.
Fin
Bill Kurtis: Professional wrestler Masaya Mikami has some of the fastest moves of anyone wrestling today.
Mikami nods his head.
Bill Kurtis: So I've come to this ring to see who's faster...
Mikami tilts his head and looks quizzically at the former CBS News anchor.
Bill Kurtis: ...on the Internet.
A referee walks in from the right and hands a laptop to Mikami, while Mister Kurtis grabs one from offscreen.
Bill Kurtis: I'll be using the AT&T 3G LaptopConnect card. He won't.
While the host of such shows as Investigative Reports, American Justice, and Cold Case Files explains the features and benefits of this thing that gives you satellite internets or whatever, Mikami frantically types on the keyboard. Eventually, in his trademark crazy-prepared fashion, he pulls a piece of paper from his pocket and places it over the screen. He turns the laptop around just as the pitchman finishes speaking, revealing what looks to be a photocopy of the AT&T homepage. The referee shakes his head and raises Mr. Kurtis' hand.
Referee: The winner, by disqualification!
Bill Kurtis: I'm Bill Kurtis...and I'm faster than Mikami.
Disembodied voice: Switch to the nation's fastest bla bla bla yackity schmakity
Cut to an AT&T boardroom.
Suit: Eh. Nice idea, but I don't think it's different enough from the Floyd Mayweather one. Pass.
: DAMMIT!All the suits look around in confusion. The one already standing opens a door, revealing Mikami on the other suit holding a cup.
Mikami: I am not that upset, really. The extra exposure would have been nice, though.
Suit: Who let you in here?
Mikami: Oh, it was that nice--
Suit: Just...get out. Please.
Mikami: O.K.
As Mikami leaves, the businessman sits back down in his chair.
Suit: Alright, next commercial.
Bill Kurtis: Professional wrestler Rick Mad is--
Suit: Oh for the love of...PASS.
Fin
