Feedback on my RP? Please!

[TheButcher]

I had a good conversation with Bates on how to effectively RP, tell my character's story, but also focus on my upcoming match..

So, I've implemented Bates advice (and hopefully, I didn't mess that up...lol)

And, structured my RP in a different style, etc.

I am DAMN determined to shake off my 15 year absence from efedding, and the rust that comes with it..lol Hopefully, soon..I won't have to ever refer to my 'my rust' and make my RPs enjoyable to read, and also develop my character..)

Now, don't bash too much because I will pout and cry...oh wait, I DON'T HAVE FEELINGS IN THE FIRST PLACE...lol jk)

Thanks you all for support and helpfulness...I do mean that. Great organization, great talent, and great 'family.' *****Night all!*****

[Severan King]

This needs to be moved to the Feedback Board

[TheButcher]

See, I knew I'd screw it up. Ughhh.. Still trying to figure what goes where.. Thanks for the info., King! I appreciate it. *smacks his head in the process* lol